Chapter 1: Miura Yumiko's plan is wrong as I expected.

It is me, Hikigaya Hachiman, bewildered in an empty hallway. Well, it's not actually empty, as I am standing with another person, a rather peculiar person for me to be alone with nonetheless. Her eyes pierce right into my face, a fiery look that absolutely contrasts with her glossy green eyes. That's right; in front of me is no other than Ms. Popularity, Miura Yumiko the Fire Queen.

"Hey, do you like Yukinoshita?" her voice is as sharp as a razor.

"Eh?!"

…

Club meeting was held today like usual with just the three of us. Yukinoshita made tea, I continued with my light novel while Yuigahama was trying to chat things up. Not every day there was people barging into our doors; maybe it was for the best, at least I could enjoy my time in peace.

But that day was not today.

The noise of the door crank drew my attention, as I quickly caught a glance a pair of white thighs exposed by a skirt that was definitely violating school regulations. It wasn't that I was some kind of pervert, it was just in my face and I was just stating the facts.

Either way, the figure who just stalked into the room was other than Miura Yumiko. It wasn't the first time she came to this club room, but this was the third time already. Had she already became one of our regular customers?

"Yahallo Yumiko!" Yuigahama quickly gave a cheerful greeting.

"Hey Yui." Surprisingly the Fire Queen only gave her subject a short half-hearted welcome. She seemed to be focusing on something else.

Meanwhile, Yukinoshita was still nonchalantly sipping her tea.

With her arm crossed, she surveyed the room like a lioness stalking her prey. Suddenly, her head turned directly to me.

"Hikio, got a moment?" it's like she gave an order.

"Yeah." I gave a half-ass response.

"I need to talk to you," her eyes darted to Yukinoshita, "alone."

Wait, what?

"Eh!" Yuigahama startled. "Yumiko, if there's anything that bothers you, talk to us, we can solve this together. I mean, three person thinks better than one, right?"

I wholeheartedly disagreed.

"Sorry Yui, but I just want to talk to Hikio."

Yuigahama was in shock, and so was I. Why would Miura have anything to do with a lowly peasant like me? What was this, some type of rom-com situation?

Yuigahama looked over to Yukinoshita, in hope that she would say something, but the girl with night-coloured hair just kept a silent, emotionless look.

"Fine by me," Yukinoshita said, "I don't know what you want to do with him, but despite our differences; I must warn you that you should be careful when you are around him alone."

"I don't need you to tell me that much." Miura smirked.

These women! Being opposite like fire and water like those two, they sure had a common interest of treating me like insects.

After a final and almost nonexistent glance at me, Miura Yumiko left the building.

…

And here we are again.

"Eh..eto…" I stutter, "I don't actually hate her, I guess."

"What kind of half-assed answer is that?! Do you like her or do you not?" Miura lashes at me.

"Kch!" I flinch. "And why should I tell you that? My interest is none of your concern."

"Normally that would be the truth, but this time it's different."

She just flat out admits that she doesn't care about me. Well it's not like I care about her anyway, maybe just a little bit.

"Look! If you really like her, you should go and get her, got it?"

"First of all," I put some weight into my tone and address her carefully, "Why do you care about me and Yukinoshita together?"

"Because-"

She looks away from me.

"Because if she is taken, Hayato will…"- Miura speaks with a weak, airy voice.

Oh, so that is what it is about.

Basically, right now it is no secret for me, Yuigahama and Miura that Yukinoshita and Hayama had a history together. The relationship between those two could have been deeper than any of us could have ever imagined; which means, at the moment, Yukinoshita is possibly the biggest obstacle in Miura's conquest of Hayama Hayato.

By having me going out with Yukinoshita, she can effectively get rid of that obstacle without resulting in more violent, bloodier method.

Note to self: lay off yandere shows and games, even though I do partly sympathize with their desire to kill everyone they can.

But as flawless as it sounds, there is a problem.

"Unfortunately, I can't help you with that."

"Why not?"

"First, do you think that I even have a chance with Yukinoshita?"

"That's true, but-." Miura mutters to herself.

It's not like I disagree with her, but her flat affirmation irritates me a little bit. You still haven't been able to dig your claws into Hayama either, you hag!

But back to the topic. Second, I can't go out with Yukinoshita just to separate her from Hayama, because if so I would be playing with her feeling. As bitter as I might be, I understand the boundary and the fragility of a person's emotion.

"But you like her right? So it's a win-win for both of us."

"I-I never say that I like her!" I stutter, my eyes avoid hers.

"Why not? I mean she's good looking, good at school, good cook.. good manners.. and all of that useless stuff," Eh Miura-san, don't you sound a little bit bitter while saying that?

"It's not as simple as that" I make a dull remark, almost like I'm just muttering to myself, "If the feeling of love and admiration can be rationalised through such simple features, there would be no pain and suffering because of love. Love, like the rest of humankind, is chaotic and irrational."

"Huh?"

"Never mind." I quickly dismiss myself.

"So you will do it?"

"No."

"But you are the Service Club! It's your duties to help other students with their request, isn't it?"

Hey missy we are the Service Club, not the Genie club, even though how nice it would be if we actually were.

"Like I already told you, there is no way Yukinoshita would agree to go out with me." No matter how you ask for it, the simple truth is still there, and it has nothing to do with me.

"Tch!"- Miura looks away, clenching her teeth.

She stays like that for a few seconds, her expression is mixed between frustration and deep thought.

"Fine!" Closing her eyes, Miura lets out a compensating sigh as she says.

Looks like she have given up.

"If that is your problem, I can help you with that."

"Huh?"

"Of course in this current state of yours, it's would still be impossible."

Huh.

"But let see if I can fix that rotten look of yours. Your chance would be better that way. It would be hard, but I can see it as a challenge."

Damn you woman. You and Yukinoshita are actually pretty much the same, aren't you? But wait, this is not about me dating Yukinoshita, it's about love and its emotional values, its unpredictable, chaotic nature.

"Huh?!" She raises her voice even higher and fils it with pure authority. "I already offer to help you already! You still got a problem with that?!"

Uwahh that's scary. It seems like the Queen has lost her patience.

At this point, it's pretty much confirmed that she will not back down. For now, I will just roll along with her scheme until I can come up with a way to get out of this.

I sighed to myself. "Fine then."

"Good." She extends her palm toward me.

"What?"

"Your mail and phone number, are you stupid?!"

"Oh yeah."

Yukinoshita's insult is like a winter rain, piercing and sinks deep into your skin. Miura's insult is like a summer fire, spontaneous and roasts you on the surface.

"Alright, I guess, see you Hikio."

Putting her phone away, she quickly turns and walks away. Her hair flutters as I scent a poppy fragrance sent straight into my nose.

You see, Miura-san, it's not that I am stupid. It's just that I cannot believe.

I stand there dumbfounded. My phone is still in my hand and the screen is still lit up. The name Miura Yumiko, that belongs to the Fire Queen, the top of the social food chain, shines brightly on my contact list.

I feel like hearing something crackling. Something Thou Art I and I Am Thou I don't know.

A/N: Hi guys, there doesn't seem to be enough Miura fanfiction I thought I'm making my own this time around. Hope you enjoys reading this.

Also, this is the updated version, I fixed some grammars and make some slight adjustments.