again, some sexually explicit content in this chapter: you have been warned!

You Give Love a Bad Name

)*(

"Nao, don't stop!" Sesshomaru rasped, his writhing body afire. His back arced off the bed the bed then immediately caved back down, searching for that perfect angle, that perfect spot and he wanted, but was denied at the same time.

His legs, almost as erect as his own cock, were planted flush against Nao's sweaty, chiseled torso, his ankles flanked his gloriously undone face. Nao's curls grew like sea serpents during sex and it never failed to make Sesshomaru weak inside though he'd never admit it.

"Never. I make the rules." Nao slung back his hips and bucked back into Sesshomaru with a wet slap of his ballsack. Sesshomaru saw spots; he tore at the sheets of Nao's bed, biting his lip, suppressing a yip of pleasure.

"Nao…" it was great the only syllable he could think of was his name. Sesshomaru opened his eyes from squinting them shut in barely hidden lust. He lifted his neck, but didn't need to much. Nao loomed over him, all passionate black velvet.

Nao, hazy eyed, eyebrows slanted, and jaw loose, crumbled before him. Nao was that beautiful moment of darkness right before dawn, that let you know you had more time to sleep, or party. His shoulders, his arms, everything that was usually so tense and rigid in him melted and softened.

Well, almost everything. He left out one large exception.

Sesshomaru let out an unabashedly loud moan as Nao changed his angle, slamming into his prostate just right. His eyelids fluttered and his toes curled.

"Y-y-yeah Nao." Sesshomaru whimpered and if it was anyone else he was getting pounded from he never would have lived that down. It wasn't a sound he allowed himself to make.

But this was Nao. Nao was his exception.

His cock twitched and tingled, straight and tall as a lighthouse. He was about to come and Nao had hardly even touched it. It wasn't fair, he could hold on for hours before he Nao fucked him for the first time and positively ruined him for other men. He could basically not resist him. He almost resented Nao for his prowess.

It also wasn't fair Nao tied his arm to the bed. That dirty cabrao: fuck.

"Shhhhooo...you're too tight. I am going you defeat you. You're bane of my existence." Nao's voice always somehow got higher during sex. Sesshomaru had to smirk at that, Nao had the quirkiest dirty talk. He could serve it back.

"You're just my filthy little puta. Bow down." Sesshomaru managed to pant out, hair fanned out in tangled, sweaty strands across the bed. Usually the condition of his hair was a high priority, but now it didn't matter to him all. The dorm could burn down and he wouldn't leave till Nao came inside him like a firehose.

"Fuck you. Foda-se. I'll show you little." Nao growled out, himself, in Portuguese. And in a high, lung raking gasp he rocked back into Sesshomaru at a shockingly slow pace. Sesshomaru hips jutted forward begging for all of him.

"Is it in yet?" Sesshomaru knew he was cruising because Nao's eyes flashed bright and sharp. Sesshomaru fought a laugh. He was feeling particularly snarky this morning.

Maybe because it was Christmas.

"I'm going to fuck you through this mattress. I'm gonna make you beg for it like a dog. You won't leave this bed for a week!" Nao's pupils, dilated in a lust only meant for Sesshomaru. His red brown appeared serious, but his voice smirked and gave away his game.

Sesshomaru could usually tell when Nao was lying or hiding something.

Nao took Sesshomaru's quivering erection into his lube greased right hand and began to pump it like a super soaker. Sesshomaru sucked in a lungful of steamy air. Damn Nao. He was helpless against that. He, unable to get any leverage and tied up, trembled vulnerably. Today he was entirely at Nao's mercy, and he was proving to be relentless.

Sesshomaru howled a bunch of garbled syllables into the air, his blood had lava gushing in it and deep within him he knew he was close to eruption.

Nao, who just had slowly pushed in, pulled out quickly just to completely fill him again and tilt his hips, just like he knew how Sesshomaru liked it. Sesshomaru would have to get him back for this later. He was just being cruel.

"Nao Kumo I hate yo-" Sesshomaru spurted all over himself and Nao's hand. Sesshomaru had no idea how he managed to find the brain capacity to make a sentence when his brain had nothing but fireworks exploding in it. His jaw hung loose and his eyes unfocused on Nao who sported a conniving smile. He relished in getting Sesshomaru off first.

Nao took his right hand and licked Sesshomaru's cum from it. It turned Sesshomaru on, but after sex it did weird him out.

But this was the guy who had 'Too Weird to Live, Too Rare to Die' tattooed across his chest.

"I hate you more Sho Taisho." Nao's voice sounded gravely with desire. Sesshomaru watched Nao's body shudder and convulse. His face slacked and he almost looked in pain as his lower body thrashed and a choked, high, scream rushed out his lungs. His whiskey colored eyes smoldered, flickering and yielding, like every time he came into Sesshomaru he gave up a part of himself. Besides semen.

The dark and powerful Naoki Kumo, buckled and collapsed. Nao was utterly at his mercy.

Nao didn't care about the mess as he let Sesshomaru's legs go and they both fell heavy and limp on either side of the raven haired man. He pulled gingerly out of Sesshomaru and carefully slid up Sesshomaru's spent body, both breathing heavy and humid. Sesshomaru met his dark eyes and unleashed a rare, candid smile which Nao reciprocated fully. Nao nuzzled his handsome, sweaty face in the crook of Sesshomaru's neck, laying somewhat on the bed, and somewhat on him.

Sesshomaru learned something quite curious about Nao from their first round of sex. The 6'5'' 190 pound, ripped to hell defenseman, who had an arsenal of sex toys: loved to cuddle.

Nao took cuddling very seriously. Sometimes requiring an hour or so of it.

Sesshomaru didn't mind, he could lay with him till the apocalypse occurred, or they got horny again. Or Nao got hungry. Sesshomaru knew which one would occur first, well, Sometimes Nao did get particularly hungry, the man had a voracious appetite.

Nao captured his swollen lips softly. Tenderly, quite unlike the sex they just had, he moved his lips against Sesshomaru's, breathy, tentatively, and completely enraptured. It quietly humbled Sesshomaru that Nao always gazed, kissed and caressed him like he was always surprised and grateful he was in his bed, not bolting to leave.

He would have to work on that, because despite how odd Nao was; he was the best thing to happen to him.

Not that Nao needed to hear that, his ego was already too big.

"We have each other's tattoos." Sesshomaru finally spoke as Nao lavished his attention on his neck and Nao peeled back, confusion and anger flamed in his eyes.

"You are no spider. We've been over this." Nao's voice held a stern note and Sesshomaru rolled his eyes, of course he'd assume the damn spider tat. That wasn't the only one he had, and he knew that. He needed to get the damn thing covered up if he was this hung up over it.

"No, your quote. It suits me better. At first I thought it suited you, but I've realized I'm the weird one, and surviving a wreck like mine is pretty rare…well and the obvious drug use." Sesshomaru thought out loud and Nao still thinned his lips in an angry warning.

"You've been clean for three weeks and two days." Nao missed the point. Damn why did he even say anything.

"I meant in the past. Mine is 'whatever happens, happens'. It defines you much more you than me. You just don't get hung up on life's bullshit like I do." Sesshomaru explained and Nao finally got it, nodding in agreement and continued to kiss down and up his chest. Nipping every so often, until he got back up to his neck

"You…" nip. "can…" suck. "be a little…" lick. "too uptight…" kiss. Sesshomaru flicked his shoulder with a strong fingernail.

"What? It's my job to loosen you up, to be your bad influence." Nao chuckled into his neck. It tickled and Sesshomaru squirmed a bit, smiling softly.

"You're an idiot." Sesshomaru scoffed.

"You chose an idiot, that makes you a bigger idiot." Sesshomaru moved to try to get from under Nao and smack him a pillow but Nao held him fast.

"Merry Christmas Iceman." Nao said in between giving him a hickey and biting his ear. He hoped his father didn't care about the hickey, he owned no turtlenecks.

"Merry Christmas Nao.…What?! I'm not calling you Maverick." Sesshomaru absolutely refused to indulge Nao in that particular pleasure. Nao scowled and assumed his position of big spoon, Sesshomaru's left side up, Nao snaking his left arm around his waist and under his arm to untie it from the bed.

They simply lay, curled together, sweaty and slightly skin on skin, sheets forgotten. Blissed out of their skulls. He found his home, which was convenient because he didn't have one before.

Sesshomaru, sappily, knew this was the best Christmas he could wish for. Fantastic sex and someone who wanted him, and fought for him. Someone he could, and would, do the same for. It also helped Nao just always smelled good. He smiled, and he knew it lit his face.

They had decided to forgo real presents this year. Except not.

Nao was working on getting his license back; he'd be eligible for it soon. Nao promised he would drive him around in Tereza Senda, which he improperly pronounced, Tenseiga, his blue Rx-7. He couldn't wait for that. Sesshomaru, secretly, got them both tickets to the L.A. Kings versus New Jersey Devils NHL game in a couple weeks.

Also, because Tessaiga Enterprises helped update the sound system for the Staples Center, Sesshomaru managed to get Nao locker room access to meet the Devils, his favorite team.

He was approximately ninety-eight percent sure he would enjoy this gift.

Sesshomaru had sneaking suspicion Nao got him something as well, he always seemed to be scheming.

Nao's left hand roamed over his arm stump the down his body, and his right scratched his scalp and he hummed in approval.

Sesshomaru was about to ask when they were expected at Nao's father's house for Christmas dinner when his phone went off. Nao, closest to it, grabbed it.

He had learned Nao's real last name was Onigumo. Which explained a lot. Nao's father, Nataku Onigumo was a true legend, well, still is. He successfully defended people who no one wanted to. He could talk circles around prosecutors like he dribbled a ball around defenders.

The public thought he fled America to avoid another attack on his family, but really he just managed to completely change his and Nao's identities. Not an easy feat, but apparently he was just that good, or knew some criminals who owed him some very large favors.

"Blocked number…." Nao murmured, he knew that murmur. It was the suspicious sort.

"Probably just some telemarketer. Let it go." Sesshomaru waved it off but Nao, the paranoid bastard answered it. He was paranoid ever since Magatsuhi's parents posted his bail. All their trials were next month, unless a continuance was granted.

"Speak fast shit stain or I will reach through the phone, fist my hand down your throat and play your vocal chords like a guitar for you." Nao threatened viciously, obviously expecting it to be Magatsuhi. Sesshomaru groaned. Couldn't they just have a normal Christmas?

After that day in November, things went almost precisely how Nao told him they would. The neighbors heard the shot and called it in. That obviously tipped off about the whereabouts of the armed robbers. Byakuya, the only member not involved with the armed robbery, rolled on all of them to cut a deal for the myriad of other charges.

When he asked Nao about how he would deal with what could easily be an attempted murder charge, and Nao's and Bankotsu's assault and battery charges his eyes just gleamed and said he took care of it.

To this day he wasn't sure what exactly Nao did, but Nao did reassure him that, no he didn't kill, nor beat the piss out of anyone. He may have just used Kanna Glass again. He also said that with no gun, Magatsuhi didn't have much on him, especially if Magastushi was drugged up and Sesshomaru was slipped something. It was his word versus his and apparently Nao offered something very generous to Byakuya to ensure he saw Sesshomaru leave before they returned from the robbery.

Nao didn't frighten him, he impressed him, and that sort of frightened him.

"What?! Who the hell is this?!" Sesshomaru stiffened. Not him. No. Not today. Not of all days. He just wanted to go ice skating and make a good impression on Nao's father. Maybe even have a nice dinner that Nao didn't have to cook. His chest clenched, and Nao picked up on it immediately.

"You're calling from a blocked number and you ask who I am?! What kind of insufferable prick are you? I will hunt you dow—" Sesshomaru turned over onto his left side and put his hand out for the phone. Nao gripped the phone like he wanted to throw it into the wall. Nao went through a phone every six weeks, even with an Otterbox. Nao, instead, put the phone on speaker and gave it to Sesshomaru.

He had been working on boundaries with Nao. Nao was slowly learning.

"Inuyasha. You're violating your restraining order." Sesshomaru spoke languidly as possible into the phone. Nao's eyes widened and then narrowed again, he could smell Nao thinking something lethally destructive for his brother.

He put the phone on his lap as he attempted to prop himself up on the headboard. Nao helped him with the endeavor. Having a jacked boyfriend was useful, Nao either hadn't picked up on the fact he sort-of used him, or simply didn't mind.

No. he probably saw it as some form of ego boost.

"Yeah, Yeah, I know. Who in the hell was that on your phone?! He sounds like an axe murderer." Inuyasha sounded a bit shaken up and Sesshomaru cracked a grin.

"I am Sesshomaru's boyfriend. I haven't ever used an axe before to kill, but if you don't have a good reason to be calling, I may prove your particular theory correct." Nao snarled into the phone and Sesshomaru glared at him. He could handle his brother.

"Fuck. I'm on speaker?! Fine, hello Sesshomaru's sadistic, serial killer, boyfriend, I'm calling to apologize so please don't lumberjack me." Sesshomaru stopped breathing. No way he heard him correctly. Sesshomaru swallowed, he couldn't lose his composure. Nao leaned back.

"Apologize?" Sesshomaru asked simply. Maybe he only meant the whole dorm room fight. It felt so long ago already. The bedroom began to feel way too small.

"…Myoga. He found out the rest of the documents from that Private Investigator, Kanna Glass. The one about dad's accident. He found some other's too, like the ones about how your grandparents weren't actually Nazis, and your custody case. Kimi fought the courts for two years in O.C., way after my mom and our dad got together, to get custody and take you to Brazil. She finally proved to the judge that dad, in a coked-out rage, threw that ugly sculpture in the foyer, the Meido Stone, at her while she was holding you as a baby. He missed, obviously. That stupid sculpture was still in the damn house. I tossed it out." Sesshomaru's pupils constricted. Nao told him about this, but it constricted his lungs to hear Inuyasha say it. The blood drained out of his face.

Kimi Silverhound was, still is, a strong woman; she did what she had to. She truly was getting better. The mental rehabilitation clinic she was in said while she was still currently 'No-Contact', she had stabilized and was doing great. If she continued to improve with her electroshock therapy, which the doctors anticipated, she'd be out of the clinic by spring break easily. He had Power of Attorney over her funds, and had already begun to search for a new condo to purchase for her. One that was pristine, white and one he'd buy a red carpet and white suede sofa for. He and Nao planned on flying to Rio to see her for spring break.

Yeah, that's how serious they were, planning spring breaks and stuff like that. Sesshomaru would never admit it but he was so relieved he could plan things in advance together.

"I knew dad wasn't ever father-of-the-year, but he'd put on this big song and dance for whenever you came around. Like we were some happy-cutesy shit family, but we weren't. I resented that you never saw what dad could really be like." Sesshomaru didn't move a muscle. He didn't dare breathe. His skin pricked with chills.

"You know, he watched like every video your mom sent of you doing that weird martial art, Karaoke. And he loved your soccer games. I had to bring home every goddamn trophy in existence to get him to give a shit about my games. He put you on some freak pedestal, but I think what he probably did was play us off each other. I remember when you would come around, it was all about what the fuck I was up to." Inuyasha confessed. Sesshomaru could tell his brother was getting emotional over the phone. He never rambled like this. This was new territory for the both of them.

He really wanted to get some Vicodin. He had a bottle of Valium that he hadn't touched. He didn't know if Nao knew about the bottle or not. His chest started to pinch and his throat clenched.

"It wouldn't be surprising if he had." Sesshomaru finally found his voice. It sounded enough like him but he didn't remember signaling his brain for the words. He could tell Nao next to him was watching him like a hawk. His eyes burned his temple like a sniper scope.

"Yeah. My mom played me too, I just…I…I just. You were an easy fall guy. I lied to you, I cared mom cheated on dad, even if he was an alcoholic cokehead. Your P.I. had no evidence he ever threatened my mom; I can believe that. She should have just left. I think…I think she stayed because she got used to the lifestyle, and to embezzle. I still love her though." The bedroom now positively felt too small, he languished to get out. Maybe he should hang up. Sesshomaru knew the whole report Kanna Glass found.

She had been eerily thorough, like that hacker from the 'Girl with the Dragon Tattoo' book. His blood began to itch. This conversation was headed a way he couldn't possibly handle. His lungs rattled.

"Listen. I know we haven't been close since I was like, ten or something, but if dad wanted you to have some shit, it should be yours. I'm not getting cheated; we're well taken care of, I know you won't like kick us out of the house like some grinch. I don't even want the company, I don't know anything about running one or outdoor music festival stages, sound equipment, lights, or stage effects. I'm gonna drop out of the case." Sesshomaru's eyes shot wide open. What had he said? He wanted to cede the inheritance to him? Nao leaned forward, as if inspecting the phone. Time stopped. Sesshomaru' hand clenched shut and opened again, spasaming.

"Inuyasha…" Sesshomaru started but he didn't exactly know where he was going after it.

"No just…let me get this out otherwise I'm gonna pussy out of it. You're not a bad guy, I'm sorry. My life is a fucking train wreck. Kagome, as you know purposefully lied to me about being on birth control, just now found out about Kikyo and I, and not because of your P.I. Kags went through my phone. She called off the engagement and won't talk to Kikyo. Shippo, our son, is due in the next couple weeks and I can't handle any of it. I shouldn't have judged you for all your rehab stints, because honestly I get it." Inuyasha's voice got a bit ragged towards the end. Sesshomaru couldn't handle it. This was seriously too much. His brother was apologizing? After all this time? On Christmas?

Why couldn't he just stay away from him?

Inuyasha was letting him win; letting him have his things back. He was letting him have his life back while his own was falling apart. Not like Sesshomaru cared about the failed engagement, he brought the baby mama drama on himself. But, what in the hell?

He had no idea how to be anything else but the big-bad, big brother. The warning sign, don't be this guy, avoid turning out like Sesshomaru Taisho. Make sure he doesn't get his coke nailed hand on any of the inheritance. Don't be the guy with a crazy Nazi mom and the ingrate who killed his father on the 405. That's who he was, it was easy to play that part for Inuyasha, for everyone. The pressure to be something more weighed down on him like wet cement.

"I judged you as well. I may have referred to Kagome as a whiney slag, and that your only skill was CounterStrike." Sesshomaru almost smirked when he heard Inuyasha crack out a laugh on the other side of the phone.

He made Inuyasha laugh! Merda.

He was going to be sick. This was too much. He had to leave. He needed a fix. Something deep within Sesshomaru began to seize up, about to rupture. His chest ran cold, like he inhaled ice water. He hated the cold.

"You're an asshole, just not a…bad guy. I'm not going to forget the shade way you sent the blackmail and appeal paperwork to our house. It having an actual dagger in it was a bit much, Julius Caesar." Nao had not told him that. Sesshomaru clenched his fist again, the dagger Inuyasha had on him when he visited his dorm now made total sense. He felt his throat knot up and his pulse race icily. He didn't know what to do.

Nao next to him flinched and shrunk back, clearly forgetting about that little detail.

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying we should bust out Christmas stockings and chug egg nog. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if there was too much bad blood between us to start over. I could be just yammering like a gossipy housewife just to clear my own conscience too. But, fuck it. It's Christmas, and well, if I can't tell my brother I don't blame him for our cokehead father's death, when can I?" Inuyasha concluded over the phone. And Sesshmomaru could feel the pulse beat like his favorite EDM in his ears.

His hand trembled. He had to get some drugs in his system. Now. He couldn't process all of this. His entire body twitched invisibly, going haywire, like beast inside him fought to get free.

"Oh, and sorry about that stuff I said about your mom, it was shitty. I've never even met her." Inuyasha added, his voice breaking. Sesshomaru almost lost his damn mind. That apology mattered more to him than anything else.

He had everything he had fought for. For two and a half years he fought for this and now he was terrified of it. If he got the company he could tank it. He'd be responsible for the upkeep of that cruise boat of a house in Orange County. He'd be responsible for all their investments. They had financial advisors but damn. It would all be on him. He would have to run it all, this sounded like a disaster.

He'd be the face of their company. He'd be the new legacy. No room to screw up, no room to manuever or escape. He would be it.

He'd, in probably ten years, be fully running his father's legacy. Did he seriously think he could? Did he even want to anymore? He didn't expect to win. He expected to go back to Rio and scrape by…maybe start his own sound system and stage effects company.

Could he really be responsible for all those employees!? Their jobs? The image? The brand?

"… apology accepted Inuyasha. Merry Christmas. I'll… work on removing the restraining order. Don't call, I'll call you." Sesshomaru's voice sounded hoarse and he knew it. His whole body frosted over and every muscle in body hardened like granite. He became ice.

"Yeah. Merry Christmas. Kay. Um bye." He saw the call end and he just stared at it. The only thing rattling in his head was the line: 'Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.' Sesshomaru needed get out, why couldn't he just be happy?

Wouldn't normal people be happy? Wouldn't they be jumping on the bed screaming 'Best Christmas evar #shameless?' Why was he such a catastrophic nutjob?

"…I'm gonna go wash up." Words found him, he couldn't let Nao see him get sick over this. He didn't even hear Nao's reply as he rolled out of bed and shuffled to the bathroom as if in a trance. His hand trembled on the door knob, his joints stiff and jittery at the same time.

They had a no locked door policy on the bathroom, god Nao would be livid he didn't just remove the lock. He would be kicking himself he trusted a druggie. He'd be so disappointed in him, just like everyone else.

Just like his future employees.

He went in the bathroom and in slow motion locked the door behind him. The doors on handicap bathrooms opened out, there would be no kicking down this door. Nao would just have to do Christmas shit without him.

Sesshomaru stood at the counter, he flipped open the non-child safety lid on his Valium. He hadn't used in over a month. He had a full twenty count bottle.

More than enough.

He stared at his reflection, he had slowly started to like it. He savored the scalp massages Nao gave him when he insisted on putting his hair up. He didn't regret looking like his mother knowing how much stronger and better she was getting. He hadn't had any nightmares about his arm nor the wreck. He had made progress.

Now…he just. Damn. Could he do it?

Could he really do all that he promised that stupid lawyer Bokuseno, his backstabbing stepmother, and his 'rego do cu': ass crack of a father? That he could run the company, that he could do it all?

He used to know. He used to be certain.

He had no clue. He got fantastic grades his first semester, but this was undergrad. First semester didn't mean anything. His blood seemed to rush in reverse, his muscles not getting any oxygen, the stomach sinking realization he was a fraud seeped into his system.

He was a fake, an imposter. He was going to ruin everything again. Something inside him wanted to bust free. He wanted to scream as loud as he could.

He took the bottle and sunk like a stone to the floor, he spilled the Valium tablets across the freshly bleached linoleum. He hated dirty bathrooms, filthy anything. Nao thought he was a bit obsessive, like he was one to talk.

The green tablets just mocked him. Take me! Pick me! What's the harm in just one, five, nine?!

Somewhere, deep down, he knew he was better than what he constantly succumbed to. Was it too deeply buried to reach? That little crescent of himself, was it too small to save him?

He heard a knock on the door and his name.

Nope. He couldn't let Nao see him like this. Not this trembling, naked, hyperventilating wreck on Christmas. He'd have to wait. Nao would just have to wait to see his whacked out, letdown of a boyfriend curled up on the floor like a goddamn psycho.

They had been doing so well in therapy too. They both decided to go to someone good together, some old bat named Dr. Kaede. She was sharper than they gave her credit for. Much smarter than the quack the college provided. Nao was going to start legitimate anger management next semester. He would see a substance abuse specialist.

Was he just going to throw it all away? Wasn't that the same question Nao asked him once?

He wasn't thinking of a permanent solution to a temporary problem, he just needed a fix. He needed to feel loose, not this heaving, white knuckled, brittle as glass, chaos storm. He gripped his hair in tangled wad, about to pull it out, he embodied the word 'stress-case'.

Maybe pulling his hair out would make him feel better…maybe he should claw his skin off too.

His knees became damp against his cheeks. Jesus fucking the Easter bunny was he crying on Christmas?! He really could Pisar na Bola, drop the ball. Screw up.

Nao could do so much better. If he could find someone to deal with him having an Amazon Prime account solely for replacing gaming controllers, phones, and phone cases, that is.

The knocking became erratic, panicked pounding. Nao's voice was yelling now, almost shrill. Nao knew. Nao hated him. It was only a matter of time before he couldn't put up with his shit.

Sesshomaru pushed the pills around on the floor. Was he really hesitating? He never had before. What had changed? Was it that he promised his mother he'd visit and show him his sobriety chart? Well sober off drugs at least.

Was it Nao? No…not even Nao. Nao definitely held him together through some dark times. But still, he wasn't the reason he hadn't swallowed six Valium. He certainly was a partial reason…

Sesshomaru's inner musings were interrupted by a most impossible event. He heard a splintering, cracking, scrape and a devaststing crash. He jumped out of his skin, his whole body reacting like one would an explosion.

Sesshomaru tipped his head up, pupils like pinpricks.

Nao had literally ripped the bathroom door off its hinges and thrown it back into the common room. The wild, feral, unrestricted expression on his face and his flexed, tense shoulders told Sesshomaru one thing:

He had to be absolutely pissed.

Nao was going to kick his ass till next Tuesday. He didn't blame him; he broke his trust. He locked the door. They had worked on their trust issues in therapy.

Nao hastily approached Sesshomaru, balled on the floor, and instinctively Sesshomaru flinched and brought his arm up to block, waiting for the pain.

Nao stopped stock still, frozen in place. They were trapped, underwater in some sort of torture barrier, Sesshomaru thought. He shivered and couldn't breathe right. His lungs stung in his chest for air. He had to have hypothermia again. Had to.

"Sho no…no..no..no..I wasn't… Fuck." With a hard thud the floor quaked as Nao dropped to it.

Huh.

Sesshomaru chanced a peek over his knees and brought his arm down.

Nao was in some sort of contorted child's pose in front of him. It had to be uncomfortable. What was he doing? Nao was all burned skin, frizzed out black curls and his body rocked like an ocean during a hurricane. His chest was rising and falling, almost like in deep sobs.

Sesshomaru's chest gradually stopped rattling in his chest like a spray paint can. He was worried, Nao had never done anything like this before. He could usually predict Nao's behavior well, he relied on it. He didn't predict this.

Nao wasn't trying to touch him, he was just lying on the floor, over most of the pills. Sesshomaru had even forgotten about the pills.

"I'm sorry. I didn't… don't be scared of me. You are the only one who isn't. Fuck. I'm making this about me. I hate myself." Nao's voice croaked and echoed off the clean bathroom floor. Sesshomaru lifted his head, was Nao having a breakdown too?

Seriously, if only everyone could see the dumpster-fire that they were right now…

On damn Christmas. Thanksgiving was awful too. Rin had started to date some cock-up of a guy, Kohaku, who cheated on her. Nao and he, together, put Gatorade in gas tank of his ugly Dodge Charger, totaling it.

Rin was devastated someone did that to him. She was too kind. Wait. Why was he thinking about this!?

"I hate me, too. I know you wouldn't hurt me... I'm not scared of you; I'm freaked right now. I'm not me." Sesshomaru still didn't move, he wasn't quite ready. The only thing he could focus on was that he didn't want to leave. He also couldn't just leave Nao on the floor like this either.

Nao gradually lifted his messy head of raven curls, eyes red and not in the normal way. They were puffy. Nao had broken down. He had broken Nao down. So much for a Merry Christmas.

"I wasn't mad. I was afraid. I should've…" Nao put his forehead back down on his arm, banging his other fist on the floor, skin probably sticking to some of the tablets.

"You trusted me… I…" Sesshomaru trailed off. That's all he needed to say. Shame. What a chest grinding feeling. His body filled with heavy, liquid lead. He let Nao down, the only person he really wanted to hold up.

"Everyone, even Reddit, says you can't be in a relationship if you don't like yourself." Nao's voice sounded shredded in defeat. Sesshomaru's heart stopped like it had been knifed through. Nao didn't just say that. Kaede said something like that once but they were working through it, together. Them. Together. Maverick and Iceman. They were a team.

"I'm no good at any of this." Nao shifted and with lats still tense like razor wire, he stiffly sat up.

"Neither am I." Sesshomaru admitted. He never knew how much was too much or too little when helping Nao get his temper under control.

Maybe they were too screwed up to be with each other.

"Are we doing this? Are we ending us?" Nao asked, his voice just a low whisper, eyes unfocused on Sesshomaru's feet. Nao looked up, in horror at what he said and they locked eyes. Sesshomaru's insides shattered and like shards of a broken mirror, sliced him wide open. Maybe he really was internally bleeding. He already had hypothermia. His icy blood drained from his face and throbbed in his throat like a jagged ice block.

Life wasn't the movies. They weren't going to break up to work on themselves and have that magical reunion a year later with birds chirping and both of them miraculously being better at the same, in the same place.

If they ended it here. It ended. They ended.

Sesshomaru didn't say anything as Nao messed with the pills on the floor, putting them in four piles of five. Sesshomaru supposed he could take Kouga to the NHL game instead, but the thought it just filled him with a crushing, freezing, avalanche of agony.

"You… you didn't take any. You had plenty of time and you didn't take any…. Don't look at me like that. I know you had a twenty count bottle." Whiskey brown eyes lit up in amazement in the harsh fluorescent light.

No… he didn't, and yes he had time.

"And you didn't rip the door off its hinges because you had a temper tantrum. You did it because were concerned over me." Sesshomaru observed the battered door had been thrown over their sofa. Nao's face opened in surprise at Seshomaru's realization.

Nao, if properly motivated, could probably tear an entire castle apart. Mario had the wrong idea, you just tear the castle apart to find your former cokehead ice princess.

Nao gazed back at the door then to him, a glimmer of warmth flamed in his eyes. That reassured Sesshomaru.

"You wouldn't answer me…I thought maybe you had taken too many and were…I should have trus-" Sesshomaru didn't need him to finish his sentence. Sesshomaru just started laughing, a brittle, slowly warming laughter. His chest began to thaw out.

They still had more issues than Playboy, but they were… actually getting better. He could do it. He would give it all his best shot. Upper right ninety. He would try his best to do it all, run Tessaiga Enterprises, manage the mansion, graduate with honors, help his mother, win every soccer game, stay sober.

Stay with Nao.

He heard Nao laugh too, his rich, black licorice laugh.

"Let's shower. Then go ice skating and see if your dad hates me." Sesshomaru suggested in between laughs. He really wanted a shower. A shower with Nao in it. Sesshomaru slowly, methodically, began to uncoil. His muscles finding their rhythm, as he rose off the floor. His ass was sort of asleep. He didn't know long he has been sitting like that.

He was going to be so sore. Maybe Nao was right about him not walking straight. Whatever. He was still going ice skating. Nao promised he'd teach him and not be a prick about it.

"I trust you Nao." Sesshomaru this time, leaned over and gripped Nao's strong chin tilting it up, forcing him to look at him. To really believe and understand him.

"I trust you too, Sho." Sesshomaru brushed his lips against Nao's. They'd figure this out together. Nao wasn't the only one who could be possessive.

Nao was his. He would be no one else's dark, enthralling creature.

"You were right when we first met. You know." Nao had finally stood; still looking shaken and pale in the harsh light. He ran a strong hand through his rogue curly hair that Sesshomaru liked so much. Nao's eyes though, had returned to their usual sly, foxy humor.

"What are you referencing now?" Sesshomaru needed more context than that, his brain still felt like pulled taffy. He gracefully turned and put his hand on Nao's chest. Nao had some chest hair, but not as much as someone would think with curls like his.

"Figure skater. Took lessons and competed for like six years as a kid. Had the fucking spangled outfits and everything. My mom loved it, she was always so stoked about it. She filmed like every performance if you want to blackmail me later. I'll even give you a dagger go with it." Nao chanced humor. Again he had been right on the money about Nao, Sesshomaru smugly thought.

"My mom would have liked you. My old man already digs you. He likes your choice in cars. You and your 'ricer-mobiles'. There's no replacement for displacement. American muscle all the way." Nao continued and glided his hands up Sesshomaru's sides. His grip had a tentative edge, like he couldn't believe they were still standing together. Sesshomaru decided to ignore the jab at his preferred vehicles; he blatantly baited him.

"If Bankotsu and Jakotsu ever saw…" Sesshomaru grinned wickedly. He pulled Nao by his dark mane into the shower stall with him. Nao followed him with glee, scheming all the way.

"Don't get too ahead of yourself or I'll lift you like the princess you are on the rink in front of everyone today." Nao's full lips vibrated into the crook of his neck as he pressed Sesshomaru gently, but completely, against the grey fiberglass wall of the shower. Sesshomaru took in a lungful of breath, smelling the coconut of Nao's hair.

"… you do that and I will certainly leave you." Sesshomaru fumbled with the shower control, finally managing to turn on the water, not nearly hot enough yet.

"Not if I'm holding you. And if you get free I'd just catch you again. You may be faster on the ground, but I'm faster on ice." Nao began to suck and work his lips against the crook of his neck. Like a vacuum, Nao vied to leave another hickey and Sesshomaru just wound his fingers deeper into his curls as Nao lifted him up by his hamstrings. He never wanted Nao to do this to anyone else.

He would keep Nao. Nao was his. They would stay Team Top Gun…despite Nao's awful taste in music.

"Stalker." Sesshomaru fired back and the water finally got hot enough, the goosebumps on his skin weren't due to the freezing water. He had to have all of Nao, more of him wet, enamored, and strong against him. He took their soap and began to suds up Nao's lower body, causing him to shiver and close his eyes.

"Priss." Nao lifted his head up, his curls absorbing the stream of water like seaweed. His bourbon eyes were glowing and entrancing Sesshomaru like a sort of haunting curse. He lathered his ass, which never failed to catch Sesshomaru's attention as he walked away, and then the other part of Nao's anatomy that could never not have his attention.

"… what are you going to tell Res Life about the door?" Sesshomaru remembered why the bathroom wasn't steaming like it should. Nao's lips peeled into a devilish smile that reached his eyes which melted in heady lust.

"I'll tell them we never had one. I'll patch up the frame. They won't see it coming." Nao owned Sesshomaru's lips in a deep, longing kiss, tongue tangling in Sesshomaru's mouth. Sesshomaru had no idea he could yearn for so someone so much, someone who made his chest erupt like a forest fire.

Sesshomaru smirked into the kiss. Nao would probably totally get away with the door prank, his manipulation skills were eerily effective.

He deepened the kiss against Nao, still tasting of scotch, plums and pepper, before pushing him away slightly, making Nao gingerly lowered him back down, regarding him like a puzzle in his games.

"You didn't see this coming." Sesshomaru instantly went to his knees and as elegantly as someone could take a dick in his mouth he did. He was definitely going to get Nao back for what he did in bed earlier.

Nao's voice peaked high like a frightened girl in the horror movies they watched and Sesshomaru began to consume him whole.

They weren't ok. But that was ok. Because they were getting better together.

'Slapshot through the heart,
and you're to blame.
you give trust a bad name.
I bicycle kick,
and you play your game
you give love a bad name.'

Fin

Thank you all who have read this fic! This fic is my little baby to the big epic fic I am currently working on. I will be writing a sequel to this from Nao's perspective, it's in the works but no eta on when I will post it.

Please let me know how you liked it! :)

-TL