Falling rain
By: Caith
Notes: Alright, this is a Jeice by Zarbon pairing ... That's pretty much all .. no sex, a little bit of suicide mentioning .. I DO NOT own this, of course. That's all.
As I watched you walk away
the rain began to fall
I hope you know I'm bleeding
for you've destroyed my wall
" I don't fell the same way about you. I'm sorry."
He downed another shot, staring through the translucent glass into the mirror hanging in front of him.
" I'm leaving .. I've got to figure myself out."
He turned his head, watching the rain trickle down the window panes. He couldn't really think; what he needed to do now was to not think. About him. About anything.
the bartender glanced at him from where he was polishing a shot cup a little ways away, behind the counter.
" hey, buddy, you gonna be able to make it home, or should I call someone?"
Home. he had to laugh about that. home wasn't anywhere. Not without him. Nowhere could be home.
" Home, Mate? I don't have a home."
he paid for his drinks and left, turning his face up, feeling the rain fall. it felt like the tears he refused to shed.
I stand in this, the falling rain
in hope to cleanse my wounds
and your blackened memory
I pray will leave me soon
" DAMNIT," growled Berter, slamming the phone down. Ginyu glanced up from where he was watching the television. " More bad news?"
" yes," said Guldo, walking out of the kitchen. " Where is he?"
" he's at Raditz's. he found him on his front step at one this morning." Ginyu shook his head, while Recoome tired to calm his large friend.
" This is getting ridiculous! He wasn't so bad before, but every since-" he couldn't finish the sentence. Everyone knew already.
" I'm gonna go get him," said Recoome, picking up the keys form the side table. Guldo sat down heavily, and Berter sighed.
" What are we gonna do ...?"
Ginyu shook his head. " Jeice is old enough to take care of himself, Berter. We can't govern his decisions."
" I know that! You know I know that. But ... I can't stand seeing him like this. He used to be so different.."
I'm beginning to ask myself
what I saw in you
I wonder if you understood
my heart was always true
He sat on his bed, a million emotions surging through him. Anger, pain, sadness, regret, self-pity- all churning in the pit of his heart. The narrow halls of the apartment still echoed with the angry words that he and Berter had exchanged when he came home late again.
" We can't keep letting you do this!"
" You aren't my god-damn bloody babysitters!"
" We might as well be, for all you take care of yourself!"
" Just leave me the hell alone!"
" Not if you're going to act like a spoiled child!"
That had been unfair; they all knew it. Berter couldn't apologize, Jeice couldn't forgive. He had walked, tight lipped, to his room. Everyone else was downstairs, sorting out their confused thoughts.
He shook his head and got up, ready to go to bed- and saw him in a group picture he had forgotten to burn. He took one look at the framed photo and fell to his knees, tears falling uncontrollably as his last defense was shattered.
how can you not understand
my pain deep down inside?
you promised you'd stay here with me;
but you got off the ride.
He gazed languidly out the window; it was raining again. Perfect. Almost dreamily, he made his way to the door, grabbing his leather jacket. Everyone else was out; they wouldn't know until it was all over.
So much the better for him.
Without a look backwards, he walked out into the rain, heading for Destiny bridge. Such a stupid name, he thought, for people who can't get a grip on reality. He was one of those people. Destiny bridge was where he had begun this hellish ride- so Destiny bridge was where it would end.
Oh, the sweet irony ...
I cannot feel the knives
the elements are naught
but as I teeter on the edge
in you're eyes I'm caught.
The wind was really howling now, working it's way up to ship killer status. He stared up at the sky, filled with lightning and booming thunder. rain pounded against his body, soaking through his one jacket. But he didn't feel it. He couldn't feel anything now ...
He sat on the rail of the bridge, thinking that, for once, those hellish gymnastics lessons when he was nine were going to pay off. He stared down into the beast of water below, not feeling, not caring .. What would he put on his gravestone, he wondered? Ah, he had the perfect thought ...
It's all your fault. there you go, that was it. Who said he wasn't creative? getting up on his feet, balancing perfectly on the rungs, he wondered if he should say anything. Goodbye, cruel world seemed so overrated.
I hate you ...
And he jumped.
I can feel my breathing
slowing to a halt
I hope you know my heart
is still locked in your vault.
He felt something grab him around the waist; and then everything went black.
When he woke up, he was back in the apartment, lying on his bed. And someone was sitting at his desk, watching him. Someone with blue skin and long, green hair, pulled back in a braid. He lifted up the picture frame, the one he had slammed down the night before. And then, as though just realizing it, he turned to the man on the bed.
" Oh, good. you woke up."
God, he didn't know whether to scream or cry or kill the man sitting in his bedroom, acting like saving him from jumping off a bridge was the most normal thing in the world.
" Jeice, I'm sorry. I want to talk -"
" It's a little damn late for talking, Zarbon."
I do not want to see you
I just cannot forgive
but something about you're feelings
forces me to live
Zarbon sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the man. Jeice drew back inside of the covers , glaring angrily at him, struggling not to cry.
" What are you doing here?" he hissed, eyes beginning to water. The other man shook his head.
" I .. was keeping in contact with Berter. He came home early, and saw you were gone ... so he called me."
Jeice said nothing for a while, then laughed.
" Why did you bother? I don't want you're help, Zarbon. I don't want anybody's help."
his patience finally wearing off, the green haired man slammed one fist into another, drawing dangerously close to the man he had saved.
" Jeice, I came back because I care about you, damn it! You need help, and I refuse to let you crash and burn because of-" he cut off, voice choking. He began again in a softer voice, and Jeice was surprised to hear tears there. " Because of me."
Jeice tried to harden his heart, but he could feel himself thawing.
" you don't have the right to try and help me. And you know it."
Zarbon stared at him. Then he exploded.
" You are trying to die! And I - I don't want you too!"
And, suddenly, he threw himself forward and grabbed Jeice, kissing him deeply.
I think I finally understand
why you had to go
but now you're back, and here with me
no more burdens for me to tow.
Jeice stared at him when he broke the kiss. Zarbon glared at him, tears falling.
" Stop this," he whispered, gently brushing the hair out of his lover's face. " stop trying to convince yourself that you have to die to be happy."
Jeice tried to harden his heart, but it didn't work. he could feel himself thawing.
" you left me there," he said softly, turning his head. " you left me there, on Destiny Bridge. What was I supposed to do? You were my whole world, Zarbon. It shattered then."
Zarbon gently pulled Jeice into his lap, where, from long experience, he snuggled up.
" I .. was a fool. I didn't think I knew enough to love you. I wanted to make sure you would always be happy, and I thought that if I left, you'd be able to find someone who wouldn't hurt you. I was wrong."
Jeice said nothing. Zarbon's whole body started to shake. Jeice glanced up- to feel salty tears falling on his cheeks. He gently touched the other man's face. Here, with him. this was all he wanted.
" Zarbon ... it's alright .. don't cry ..."
" I'm sorry ..."
" I forgive you ..."
The larger male stared down at him. Jeice smiled. " that's enough crying ."
" Yeah." Zarbon wiped his eyes with the back of his hand, giving a poor stab at dignity. He failed miserably. " Care to try again, love?"
Jeice sighed, a feeling of complete content falling over him. " Only if you are."
Listening at the door, Berter smiled to himself and walked away to go to sleep.
My life has re-booted
I know what to do
I no longer cry
because I'm here with you.
" And there's the flag! The winner for the third straight season , Jeice Blade!"
The crowd went wild as the winner of the race got off of his custom motorcycle to receive the cup. No one recognized the man that came up and hugged their motorcycle champion, with long green hair and blue skin, but what did it matter? he had just won the racing championship for the third time in a row. Everyone was celebrating.
Jeice grinned as Zarbon twirled him around in a circle. " You did it!"
" We did it." said the small man softly, gently planting a quick kiss on his lover's cheek before going off to meet the rest of the team.
As I glance up at the sky
the rain ceases to fall
I'm no longer alone in here
because I have you all.
By: Caith
Notes: Alright, this is a Jeice by Zarbon pairing ... That's pretty much all .. no sex, a little bit of suicide mentioning .. I DO NOT own this, of course. That's all.
As I watched you walk away
the rain began to fall
I hope you know I'm bleeding
for you've destroyed my wall
" I don't fell the same way about you. I'm sorry."
He downed another shot, staring through the translucent glass into the mirror hanging in front of him.
" I'm leaving .. I've got to figure myself out."
He turned his head, watching the rain trickle down the window panes. He couldn't really think; what he needed to do now was to not think. About him. About anything.
the bartender glanced at him from where he was polishing a shot cup a little ways away, behind the counter.
" hey, buddy, you gonna be able to make it home, or should I call someone?"
Home. he had to laugh about that. home wasn't anywhere. Not without him. Nowhere could be home.
" Home, Mate? I don't have a home."
he paid for his drinks and left, turning his face up, feeling the rain fall. it felt like the tears he refused to shed.
I stand in this, the falling rain
in hope to cleanse my wounds
and your blackened memory
I pray will leave me soon
" DAMNIT," growled Berter, slamming the phone down. Ginyu glanced up from where he was watching the television. " More bad news?"
" yes," said Guldo, walking out of the kitchen. " Where is he?"
" he's at Raditz's. he found him on his front step at one this morning." Ginyu shook his head, while Recoome tired to calm his large friend.
" This is getting ridiculous! He wasn't so bad before, but every since-" he couldn't finish the sentence. Everyone knew already.
" I'm gonna go get him," said Recoome, picking up the keys form the side table. Guldo sat down heavily, and Berter sighed.
" What are we gonna do ...?"
Ginyu shook his head. " Jeice is old enough to take care of himself, Berter. We can't govern his decisions."
" I know that! You know I know that. But ... I can't stand seeing him like this. He used to be so different.."
I'm beginning to ask myself
what I saw in you
I wonder if you understood
my heart was always true
He sat on his bed, a million emotions surging through him. Anger, pain, sadness, regret, self-pity- all churning in the pit of his heart. The narrow halls of the apartment still echoed with the angry words that he and Berter had exchanged when he came home late again.
" We can't keep letting you do this!"
" You aren't my god-damn bloody babysitters!"
" We might as well be, for all you take care of yourself!"
" Just leave me the hell alone!"
" Not if you're going to act like a spoiled child!"
That had been unfair; they all knew it. Berter couldn't apologize, Jeice couldn't forgive. He had walked, tight lipped, to his room. Everyone else was downstairs, sorting out their confused thoughts.
He shook his head and got up, ready to go to bed- and saw him in a group picture he had forgotten to burn. He took one look at the framed photo and fell to his knees, tears falling uncontrollably as his last defense was shattered.
how can you not understand
my pain deep down inside?
you promised you'd stay here with me;
but you got off the ride.
He gazed languidly out the window; it was raining again. Perfect. Almost dreamily, he made his way to the door, grabbing his leather jacket. Everyone else was out; they wouldn't know until it was all over.
So much the better for him.
Without a look backwards, he walked out into the rain, heading for Destiny bridge. Such a stupid name, he thought, for people who can't get a grip on reality. He was one of those people. Destiny bridge was where he had begun this hellish ride- so Destiny bridge was where it would end.
Oh, the sweet irony ...
I cannot feel the knives
the elements are naught
but as I teeter on the edge
in you're eyes I'm caught.
The wind was really howling now, working it's way up to ship killer status. He stared up at the sky, filled with lightning and booming thunder. rain pounded against his body, soaking through his one jacket. But he didn't feel it. He couldn't feel anything now ...
He sat on the rail of the bridge, thinking that, for once, those hellish gymnastics lessons when he was nine were going to pay off. He stared down into the beast of water below, not feeling, not caring .. What would he put on his gravestone, he wondered? Ah, he had the perfect thought ...
It's all your fault. there you go, that was it. Who said he wasn't creative? getting up on his feet, balancing perfectly on the rungs, he wondered if he should say anything. Goodbye, cruel world seemed so overrated.
I hate you ...
And he jumped.
I can feel my breathing
slowing to a halt
I hope you know my heart
is still locked in your vault.
He felt something grab him around the waist; and then everything went black.
When he woke up, he was back in the apartment, lying on his bed. And someone was sitting at his desk, watching him. Someone with blue skin and long, green hair, pulled back in a braid. He lifted up the picture frame, the one he had slammed down the night before. And then, as though just realizing it, he turned to the man on the bed.
" Oh, good. you woke up."
God, he didn't know whether to scream or cry or kill the man sitting in his bedroom, acting like saving him from jumping off a bridge was the most normal thing in the world.
" Jeice, I'm sorry. I want to talk -"
" It's a little damn late for talking, Zarbon."
I do not want to see you
I just cannot forgive
but something about you're feelings
forces me to live
Zarbon sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at the man. Jeice drew back inside of the covers , glaring angrily at him, struggling not to cry.
" What are you doing here?" he hissed, eyes beginning to water. The other man shook his head.
" I .. was keeping in contact with Berter. He came home early, and saw you were gone ... so he called me."
Jeice said nothing for a while, then laughed.
" Why did you bother? I don't want you're help, Zarbon. I don't want anybody's help."
his patience finally wearing off, the green haired man slammed one fist into another, drawing dangerously close to the man he had saved.
" Jeice, I came back because I care about you, damn it! You need help, and I refuse to let you crash and burn because of-" he cut off, voice choking. He began again in a softer voice, and Jeice was surprised to hear tears there. " Because of me."
Jeice tried to harden his heart, but he could feel himself thawing.
" you don't have the right to try and help me. And you know it."
Zarbon stared at him. Then he exploded.
" You are trying to die! And I - I don't want you too!"
And, suddenly, he threw himself forward and grabbed Jeice, kissing him deeply.
I think I finally understand
why you had to go
but now you're back, and here with me
no more burdens for me to tow.
Jeice stared at him when he broke the kiss. Zarbon glared at him, tears falling.
" Stop this," he whispered, gently brushing the hair out of his lover's face. " stop trying to convince yourself that you have to die to be happy."
Jeice tried to harden his heart, but it didn't work. he could feel himself thawing.
" you left me there," he said softly, turning his head. " you left me there, on Destiny Bridge. What was I supposed to do? You were my whole world, Zarbon. It shattered then."
Zarbon gently pulled Jeice into his lap, where, from long experience, he snuggled up.
" I .. was a fool. I didn't think I knew enough to love you. I wanted to make sure you would always be happy, and I thought that if I left, you'd be able to find someone who wouldn't hurt you. I was wrong."
Jeice said nothing. Zarbon's whole body started to shake. Jeice glanced up- to feel salty tears falling on his cheeks. He gently touched the other man's face. Here, with him. this was all he wanted.
" Zarbon ... it's alright .. don't cry ..."
" I'm sorry ..."
" I forgive you ..."
The larger male stared down at him. Jeice smiled. " that's enough crying ."
" Yeah." Zarbon wiped his eyes with the back of his hand, giving a poor stab at dignity. He failed miserably. " Care to try again, love?"
Jeice sighed, a feeling of complete content falling over him. " Only if you are."
Listening at the door, Berter smiled to himself and walked away to go to sleep.
My life has re-booted
I know what to do
I no longer cry
because I'm here with you.
" And there's the flag! The winner for the third straight season , Jeice Blade!"
The crowd went wild as the winner of the race got off of his custom motorcycle to receive the cup. No one recognized the man that came up and hugged their motorcycle champion, with long green hair and blue skin, but what did it matter? he had just won the racing championship for the third time in a row. Everyone was celebrating.
Jeice grinned as Zarbon twirled him around in a circle. " You did it!"
" We did it." said the small man softly, gently planting a quick kiss on his lover's cheek before going off to meet the rest of the team.
As I glance up at the sky
the rain ceases to fall
I'm no longer alone in here
because I have you all.