t was a beautiful day outside, the birds were singing, the flowers were blooming, on days like these...a couple of faggot kids were having lunch like usual. Of these kids, were our main characters, and because they're all generic nerds, I'll have to pick out these intrepid characters for you.

By throwing them through a black hole.

Surprised, and I'm somewhat sure one of them wet their pants, knowing nerds, they all got sucked up screaming. Whoever doesn't die is our main characters.

Now let's have fun finding out.

Across time and space and shit, there twas that yandere goddess chick, with the blond hair, and the boobs. While that isn't uncommon- COUGH cough Hera cough cough -this one was more angelic than well, greek style goddesses.

Hey, hey you fucks, steer your imaginary eyes off those boobs: This is ain't no MA fic, you ain't gettin' nothin'.

Nonetheless, if you live under a rock, I'll have to educate you: Thar be Illias.

Crazy fuckin' bitch.

Anyways, we join her in a nice freeze frame of her getting headbutted in the shnoz.

Now, Illias looks confused as you can guess, getting headbutted in the face and all by some random teenager.

And nearby? There was Alice, also being introduced to the top of someone's head being applied to one's face, a new therapy to counteract consciousness.

Unlike the normalish angelic Illias, Alice was...exotic.

Big boobies, nice face, snake tail instead of legs, purple skin. Yeah, I said snake tail, we're going into THAT kinda part of japan.

Nonetheless, as with mermaids: Top half is fine, and hope to god the lower part cuts off below the important bits.

Anyways, that little tidbit aside, we shall now press 'Play' on these events.

Illias is shot back a bit, knocked off balance while flying over the church, whose church? Her church, located in Illias village, on the continent of Illias, next to Illiasburg the city.

Illias is totally a humble and down to earth goddess, totally.

Totally wouldn't leave a purple haired kid to get unbaptised because her hair was ruffled and her nose was bleeding.

Totally.

Nonetheless, the duo was surprised, previously, when a black portal materialized, materialized? Portals don't really have mass, do they?

Ah fuck it, it's magic, I'm too old for this shit. Generic placeholder magic solves everything.

Anyways, materialized in front of them...and out shot a bunch of nerds, no not the candy, but the 'glasses, D&D, and homestuck' kinda weirdo's.

The rest fell down towards the church...while two shot violently and two opposite directions.

One towards Ilias, and one towards Alice.

Surprised, they couldn't dodge in time as the two young boys, one short haired in a light grey hoodie, and the other with shoulder length dark brown hair and a black jacket slammed the tops of their skulls straight into the chins of the two powerful people. The duo were launched, one surprised and in some pain, the other straight up knocked the fuck out.

Also, safe to say the nerds were the first to pass out.

Falling, (One hitting Alice and flew back far, back where the other nerds were.) then fell through the hole created by the other nerds, landing on them with a 'CRUNCH' and some gross liquid splorching noises. It was pretty gnarly.

Also, a giant electric wheel chair fell as they started moaning, and crashed down in between the long and short haired lads, both being untouched thankfully by the wheelchair.

Unluckily, the rest didn't, and died.

"AH FUCKIN-" were the first words of the long haired one as he awoke, followed by a "-JESUS CHRIST!" The short haired one called out.

Both of the young lads had a wicked headache from something, but they didn't know what. Stumbling up they turned and looked at eachother, recognition dawning on their faces, then disgust, then looking at something else, followed by more disgust.

The events were as such: See friend, see blood and guts on friend, notice pile of dead goo, much, and viscera, get grossed out.

Simple.

"What the...fuck?" The long haired one said, confused "Cody, the fuck? Wheel chair? What? Beard guy with boobs?" He said, taking a brief glance at the old friend he never bothered to learn the name of...Jard? Something like that. Nonetheless the bearded friend had a wicked rack- but was also dead- but damn what a wicked rack.

Ahem.

"Beard guy? You mean...OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK? What the hell happened to Stephen?" The short haired one said, or well, Cody, as he had been identified.

"I don't know man, urp-" he said, before rapidly closing his mouth, his cheeks puffing out. He gulped the contents of his lunch back down and shook his head. "-but fuck man, let's get outta here before we add vomit to this pile of gross junk. Figure this out somewhere that doesn't smell like blood and shit." The long haired one said, looking around for an exit.

"Yeah I know, whoever decorated this place should be fired!"

"Looks like an edgy 13 year old who went fuckin' whacko on angels. Also-" he points towards a door at the far end of the hall. "-I think that's the exit. Let's fuckin' go before I hurl." He said, shaking his head and moving towards the door.

"Oh come on, it's not that ba-" and at that moment, Cody realised he had fucked up. "Yeah, let's fucking go"

The duo set out on a grand quest! Facing many challenges along the- oh wait wrong script.

The duo walked to the door normally, and popped it open. They blinked in surprise at what they saw: Utter fucking chaos, and shitty wood houses that you'd see in some gay ass Renaissance know,something similar early age houses in Age of Empires 2. Everyone even looked the part.

Now, the duo was unsure what to do...that is, until they saw a mop of purple hair rushing through the crowd in the other direction.

"Purp- Purple hair? The fuck?" He asked, quirking a brow. "Who dyes some twelve year old kids hair purple?" The long haired one was the one talking.

"Wait, this seems oddly familiar, maybe we should go check out who the fuck that kid is."

"Sounds like a plan, but maybe we should get some weapons or some shit, I mean, everyone has to be running for a reason y'know?" He said, looking around and spotting a shovel leaning against one of the nearby buildings, and started walking over to it.

"What do you think they're running from?" Cody asked, eyeing the crowd.

The long haired one shrugged, "Fuck if I know, bandits, fire...TAXES?!" He said overly dramatically, before chuckling "But yeah, one outta three we're gonna need something to bludgeon a fucker with so-" he picked up the shovel and slung it over his shoulder, before he turned around and paused, blinking.

"Uh, man, do you feel that this place looks a little...odd for some reason?" He said, looking around. It wasn't really that it felt odd, or looked odd, but the fact that he looked at this and it didn't look odd was what was well, odd.

"Maybe there's a glitch in the matrix, I mean, we did get sucked through a black hole, or something like that, to tell you the truth, I've never watched one of those movies all the way through."

"Neat, I guess, but no sunglasses so we're not in the matrix, that's for sure. I dunno, something about everything is just...different…" he sighed "But fuck it man, find a bludgeon and let's go find that kid, he might even have answers or something." The long haired one said.

"All right, that axe over there looks promising, not exactly a bludgeon though."

"Pop the top off and it will, but fuck it, grab it and let's go." He said, turning around and heading through the waning crowd, eyes catching onto the purple haired kid talking to some big woman, not big in the good sexy way, but in the 'I'm old with like 20 kids' kinda way.

"Fucking hell man, I've never actually seen you run before" Cody said, catching up to the long haired nerd.

Y'know, the long hair thing is getting old, it's not like its a big fucking surprise.

The fucker's name is Tristan, there, congrats.

Anyways, Tristan just shrugs "Not like we do anything in person together that isn't just chilling at lunch time, anyways, I think I saw the little fucker run off into the forest with a sword...soooo, yeah, bandits probably. We should really keep the little shit safe." He said, and pushed past the last few panicking commoners, breaking out in a jog after the young boy.

"I'm surprised they let him get this far, considering he's just a boy."

"A boy with the balls to head out with a sword and try and kill a fucker, compared to the other guys who are shitting themselves back there." Tristan said, taking a more leisurely pace as he rested, trying to catch his breath while looking for the kid.

"He couldn't have made it far, so, how the hell did we lose sight of him?" Cody asked, slowing his pace just ahead of Tristan.

"We're unathletic nerds, I'm pretty sure a 9 year old could out run us, and out stamina us." He deadpanned.

"Well, i doubt that, you're not giving yourself enough credit, jabronie, wait, do you hear a little girl screaming?"

"Aw fuck, did the bandits get a hostage or something? Let's go dude, I don't wanna deal with this shit on my conscience." He said, heading towards the noise at a decent pace.

"Wait, that's not a little girl, that's just a very feminine boy, I think. Not, sure."

"Why the heck would you know what a girly boy sounds li-" he said, before stumbling forwards, tripping on a branch and falling through a bush.

"God fucking, FUCK YOU, ya god damn, fuckin, mother nature." He said, getting up and kicking the bush off him as he stumbled into the small path...where a... a...what?

Located on the path, staring at him was...Luka, from monster girl quest, and a slime girl from that said game...both staring at him wide eyed and surprised.

"Wut." was his intelligent observation on the situation.

"Hey man, you okay?" Cody asked, walking around the bush, and stopping next to Tristan "you look like you've seen a ghost."

"Wuh, buh, wuh, huh?" He replied, before shaking his head, reaching over, and placing his hands on Cody's cheeks, turning his head towards the duo who were staring at the other duo.

"Holy fucking.. What? Is that...ARE THEY?" Cody had a horrible time speaking, and was never very good at english in the first place.

He stepped back and looked over Cody then gasped "Dude, you look like...the ANIME'S!" He said, pointing an accusing finger at Cody "But why does that feel NORMAL?" He asked himself, pointing at said person, being himself.

"I look like an anime character? Is that what you're trying to say?" Cody asked, confused.

He nodded "Fuck man, do I look like weeb god too?" He asked, looking at his hands "Holy fuck, I do! Haha, awesome." He said smiling, then looked up "Even shed some, well, visual pounds. I'm drawn skinnier or som- wait." He paused "Drawn? I'm okay with?" He pinched the bridge of his nose "No, no, stop thinking about it." He said, then looked up, and noticed everyone staring at his impromptu self talking session. He blinked in reply.

"As much as I like to hear you ramble, can we please try to figure out what the fuck that blue liquid thing is?"

"Dude, its a slime girl. Look at the boobs." He said, pointing at aforementioned jiggly bits. "We're in monster girl quest." He shrugged, not too messed up about this...mainly because he's denying that it's truly real, but eh, whatever, simple semantics.

"I guess that explains alot, but, there's no way this is real, yo. I'm just dreaming, right?"

He shrugged "Maybe, but hey, let's pretend like it is, and laugh when we wake up." He said, smiling, before glancing over to the slime girl, who had gotten out of its stupor.

"Oooohhh~! Looks like some fresh meat arrived." She said, trying to sound as sensual as possible...but came off as trying too hard, and that just kinda annoyed Tristan personally. Nonetheless he waited, walking forward a bit as she monologues.

She sniffed "And un-baptized too? Three in one day? Lucky me~!" She said cheerfully, then a lascivious smile spread on her face "So just pu-" it was then then her entire head exploded as Tristan swung his shovel in a baseball like swing, smashing her head open, and watched as the slime flew everywhere to the side...and onto Luka.

Blink, blink, blink…"Woops." He said simply.

"Bitch got what was coming to her, we didn't even need to attack as a group, or any of that tactical shit that no one in fantasy ever does" Cody said, than gave a chuckle at his own stupid joke.

He shrugged with a smile, then took a step… or he would have, if a pair of blue arms didn't wrap around him.

"You big meanie, attacking me while I'm talking. Now I've got to pu-" she pronounced the words slowly "nish" and as she spoke the last words, the damning words of "SPLORCH" oh wait, no, that's just her getting slammed in the face with a shovel.

"OW FUCK." she screeched, gripping her face as she stumbled back, or well, slithered, gooped, shlorped, (whatever the fuck slime movement is called), backwards.

The next combo was both brutal, and sudden. She felt the shovel slam into her stomach, bending her over, and then felt her smooshed midsection get chopped in half...by the shovel.

"BOOM BITCH, GET OUT THE WAY, GET OUT THE WAY BITCH, GET OUT THE WAY!" He sung happily as he golf swung her head off, which also got flung right onto Luka...who was currently running around, yelling and trying to get the goop off of him.

"Look T, that's not how you meme, you can't just say it whenever"

"It's also a meme to use memes badly." He retorted as he repeatedly slammed the shovel into the recovering slimes regrowing head, keeping it blind as he wailed on it...oh wait, it's already dead. He's just beating the shit out of a pile of goo.

"Yeah, fair point, now let's get this toddler to calm the fuck do-" he said, but was cut off by a THWONG.

The THWONG of a purple head meeting grey flat metal.

"Woops-" but then was interrupted by a loud fucking voice saying thus:

Tristan has Leveled Up!

"Wat." They both said at the same time.