" It's okay, Steve," she whispered.

The two of them were the only ones left in the empty church- a wide open (and beautiful, for that matter) space that could swallow them whole. The high ceilings captured every breath that left them, and bounced them off the stained glass windows.

Steve held her tight, considering she initiated the hug, but she liked that. Natasha could feel his breathing, his heart beat, almost every part of them. He let them stay the way they were for some time. She questioned if it was comfortable for him to be hunched over like that, but, it was likely that other things were hurting him more at the present moment.

Natasha turned her head towards his neck, nose brushing against the collar of his shirt, and deeply inhaled his usual scent. But, at the second breath, Steve pulled back, just enough to lift his head.

" You really didn't just come here because you want me to sign?"

She looked up at his blue eyes, that had now gotten brighter, with more tears threatening to come through at any second.

The corners of her mouth tweaked, and she rushed her hand over his firm jawline, " no, Steve, this is more important than any of that. I'm here for you."

The Sokovia Accords were minuscule compared to this. Frankly, she thought that when comparing it to most things, but now wasn't the time. She was convinced Tony agreed, and would admit that if he wasn't the stubborn brut he was. But, now wasn't the time for that either.

She saw him beginning to break. He wanted to, but he was clearly (and poorly) trying to hide it. Because he didn't like the attention- he never did.

" You can't be alone right now," she told him, " come back to my hotel, with me."

His eyes bugged.

" Not like that. Just to be with me, nothing else."

Steve gulped for air, breathing deep to regain control of himself, " I- you're suppose to go to Vienna."

" I can go tomorrow."

" No, I can't ask you to..."

Natasha planted both hands on his face, right in front of his ears, " Steve, you're coming with me tonight. Okay? Please?"

With his head still between her hands, he nodded. Because even if he would not admit it, he didn't want to be alone.

And, he as a little afraid of her.

They walked through the London streets. It was hardly sunny, the clouds were going to be taking over soon enough. There was a cool breeze, and an endless array of noises around them. Their arms were looped together, and Natasha squeezed him tighter, which almost hurt with the size of his arm. Despite his horrific depression, he was still a gentleman.

" Are you hungry? There's a cafe right near the hotel."

She felt the shaky breath he endured, " I'm okay, thank you," but then quickly added, " unless you are, of course."

Natasha patted his arm, " don't you worry about me, Cap."

The stopped on the corner, across from her hotel. There was a quaint newsstand to their right, with a small television playing, airing a news program that was discussing the funeral. She would have turned him away, but then he would see it, if he hadn't already.

But, she was quicker to usher Steve through the large hotel lobby, and to the empty elevator that was fortunately ready for them as soon as they got there. She watched as Steve hunched over while gripping the handrail.

" When did you last get some sleep?"

They had learned about her death three days before. If Natasha had to guess, it would have been at least that long would be his response.

" I don't know," his tone was becoming slightly faltered, " it's been a little rough. There was Lagos, and Wanda was having a hard time, so she doesn't sleep, and I don't want her to be alone..."

The elevator came to a stop, so he did as well.

" Okay, we're going to take care of that tonight, Cap." She patted him on the back when the doors opened, " lets go."

She got him inside her room, and locked the door behind them. The room was cold, a result of her leaving the air on before she left.

" This is a pretty room," Steve said.

" I"m glad you like it, because you're staying here tonight."

He turned just enough to face her, " Nat...no."

Natasha nudged him further in to the room, her hand flat on his back, " Nat, yes. You're not going to be alone tonight."

" Just tonight?"

Steve took that shot at himself, and she watched. She was rarely stumped, and simply began rubbing his arm again.

" I'm going to Vienna tomorrow, and you're going home," his face grew sadder, " and then, I'll be back there right after. That way, if you don't want to be alone again, I'll be there."

"If that's even still allowed."

" Okay, Cap, we're not doing this now."

She tugged at the collar of his jacket, which she let her pull the rest of the way off. She then shrugged off her own jacket, " take a shower, I'll order us some dinner."

He wasn't hungry, and he was pretty sure he didn't need a shower, but he had no strength to argue. And, he knew his chances were slim, sympathy or not. She'd probably hit him, if it came that.

Instead, he silently agreed, and turned to go in to the bathroom, closing the two half doors between them. Natasha let out a long sigh, before hanging both their jackets in the tiny closet. She then shifted through her suitcase for two particular items that she then removed and laid on the bed- the only bed that was in the room.

As far as dinner went, she wasn't sure what to order, or what he'd be in the mood for. He would eventually be hungry. She stood up, headed to the bathroom door, hearing the shower having already been turned on, but then hearing what sounded like...

" Steve!" she smacked her hand on the door, " Steve!"

" I'm okay," he called over the running water.

She knew better.

There was no lock on the door, so she busted in, where she was immediately overwhelmed by thick steam from the hot water. It even took a moment to see Steve, sitting on the closed toilet, most of his clothing had been discarded, except for a now untucked dress shirt, and his boxer shorts. He was hunched over, likely not noticing that she was there yet.

Natasha dropped to her knees in front of him, she could tell he was crying, his face hiding in his hands. She pulled his arms apart to fit herself between the. He flinched at the contact, but didn't fight it- he was too far gone for that. He sobbed quietly in to the nook between her neck and shoulder. She kept both arms around his back, lightly caressing up and down his spine.

" I'm sorry," he cried.

" No, no, no. Shhh, you have nothing to be sorry for. Let it out...you need to get it out."

She let him carry on, soon leading to a poor man's attempt to rock him back and forth, made awkward with both their positions, but she made do. HIs hands found his way to her back, the thick steam coating her skin, pressing her dress to stick on her back.

" Come on, shower time."

He sniffled, " what?"

Natasha stood, her sore knees cracking from pressing against the tiled floor for so long, " it'll help, come on." She pulled him to stand up before pushing the straps down her shoulders, and her entire garment down her body. She was left standing in black underwear and light blue bra (a rushed packing spurt will do that).

Steve's bloodshot eyes bugged, he watched as her hands began to unbutton his dress shirt. " What? No, I wasn't trying to..."

" It's not that kind of shower, it's just to help." He let her continue, delicately undoing each button before removing it entirely, " get in."

He listened, and when he turned he saw the bruises healing from the Lagos adventure on his back, some wrapping around to his chest. She knew that in times of extreme stress (more than his usual), the serum enhanced healing process was almost non-existent, so now it was taking much longer than usual. She followed him, closing the glass door behind her.

Like most hotels, the waters spray was on the border of painful and soothing. The walls were made of fake, but pretty, stone, and there was just enough room for the two of them. Steve dipped his head under the spray, soaking his hair, water rolling down his shoulders and back. Natasha dragged two of her fingers down his back, wanting him to speak next. Easy enough, he did.

" I knew she was still alive for two years before I went to see her. I wasted those two years."

She leaned in closer to him, " don't do this to yourself."

He had had enough. With everything else that had been happening, this only kicked him while he was already down. And then there was the hint of guilt in her gut, stemming from their (recently) failed attempt at a relationship, and how it could have only added to this. But, that always went unconfirmed. Despite that, she always kept a close eye on him (after all, they were stuck together). She was the best fit for him.

" No, I wasted time. I should have found her as soon as I knew."

Natasha circled her arms around his waist, " you don't have to justify what you did and when you suddenly woke up in to the future, Steve."

Though it went unsaid, she knew he went to see her as often as she could, once he did. He did a decent job of hiding it from everyone else, if not her. Though she would let him believe otherwise.

She felt his muscles strain, he was trying to hide the tears again, which may have been easier with the shower running over him.

" And then all the time I wasted not looking for..."

Natasha tugged him with the force of her hands, immediately stopping him. The issue was to be shelved for another time.

" None of that," she stepped away to retrieve a handful of hotel soap from the small container on the shelf behind her. The gel was worked in to a lather against his back, if anything as a calming mechanism. " You need to go back to the compound, and stay there, and relax for as long as necessary. You need time where you're not bothered by anyone or anything."

Steve sighed, turning to better see her, " but, Tony..."

" No, no, no, no. He will not be like that, he found what little soul he has left and he feels awful. He's going to lay off with his comments and this while accords thing." For now, at least.

Natasha pushed at his arm so he would turn around, and rinse off his back. He looked down at her, and she used the remaining lather on her hands to lightly caress his chest.

" I feel like I can't breathe." Her eyebrows knitted together, and he sniffled as he towered over her, but still felt like the weaker one. " I...it," he choked.

" It's okay," she whispered, lovingly rubbing his back. The water was beginning to catch her as well, " you can tell me, it's alright."

He took an a weak breath, "I-I don't remember being frozen, but, I think back on it like I was missing time, and being kept away from her, and there was nothing I could do, but I knew it was happening." Another sniffle, " when I was brave enough to see her, I thought she would feel the same, but...the Alzheimer's. It was like we were both still being kept away."

Natasha raised a hand to the side of his head, fingers lightly tugging at his ear, because she knew it comforted him in the past, " she was thrilled to see you, Steve. And no matter what she thought the circumstances, she had you. And only you were able to provide that."

" I could have done better. She was all I had from before...sorta. And I love her, and it wasn't supposed to be like this. I can't grasp that she's gone, it physically hurts."

Natasha leaned against him, holding him close. There was nothing to make it better, he was going to hurt, but he didn't have to be wandering around by himself during the ordeal. She could at least help to prevent that.

The water began to run cold, they both shivered (which said a lot of him). She reached behind him to shut up the water, and grabbed two towels from the rack right outside the shower door.

They stood in their damn under garments. Natasha stepped out first, draping the towel over her shoulders, Steve held his length wise in front of him, like he was now suddenly bashful.

" I don't have any other clothes," he said quietly.

Natasha smirked over her shoulder, " it's a good thing you have me."

That was certainly true.

She briefly retreated, the open bathroom door causing a quick escape for the thick air, and returned with the pile of clothes from before, " spare clothes for you."

He accepted them, and studied them before staring back at there, " why did you bring these? Did you have this planned?"

" I just wanted to be prepared. There's still some of your clothes in my room..sometimes I wear your old shirts to bed."

Steve shrugged, " that sounds fair."

She left him in the bathroom to change, and did so herself out in the bedroom- a worn pair of cotton shorts and a tank top. The room only had one bed because she hadn't planned that far ahead. But, it was king sized bed, and he hopefully wouldn't make a fuss.

He emerged from the bathroom as she was turning down the bed, wearing the dark gray sweatpants and black t-shirt that maybe he had missed.

" Are you sure you don't want anything to eat? The menu had a lot of options."

He shook his head, " I'm okay, thanks. I can sleep on the floor."

Natasha climbed between the sheets, " I'm sure you could," she patted the spot next to him, " get in."

" Nat, I don't know if..."

" Now, Steve." She had her way of being bossy while still being comforting.

He cave. He was too exhausted and far too needy to argue against something he did actually want. So, he walked around to the vacant side, and kneeled on to the mattress. The sheets were cool and a little stiff, and cold, but it was better than being alone.

Natasha switched off the lamp, the room went dark. He heard her shift down in to the bed, and he did the same. he had secured himself under the blanket, when he felt her hand brush his.

" Come here," she whispered.

And he did.

He scooted closer, rolling in to her side. She stayed on her back, his head coming to rest in the area between her upper arm and chest. Her fingers came to stroke his hairline, when she heard him sniffle again.

" I'm sorry I can't make it bette.r. And I'm sorry you keep getting hurt."

He let out a sign against the fabric of her top, " she'd probably get mad at me for being like this, say I was being dramatic."

Natasha smiled, her fingers moving to lightly pluck at his hair, " she wouldn't want you to worry. You're going to be okay, you will."

Steve began mumbling as he was finally drifting to sleep (her doing), forfeiting his fight against it. His last, barely coherent babble was about finding some well deserved luck to find Bucky. But, he did cuddle her closer before finally going out cold.

She kept stroking his hair, and when she was sure he was asleep, she lightly kissed his forehead.

" I've got you," she whispered.

The next morning, Steve woke spooning a pillow, and nothing else. The bed was empty, and the events of the last twelve hours came rushing back. He didn't know if he should still be upset or whatever else. The pillow next to him still smelled like her.

There was a note on the bedside table, from Natasha. It explained that she had to go to Vienna, but would meet him back in New York the next day- under any circumstances. IT came off as eager and helpful, so had had that to look forward to. He wouldn't be alone much longer.

Much longer ended up being only another hour or so, until Sam was knocking on the door. He wasn't sure how he was found, but that was probably also Natasha's doing. However, there was no time to ask.

Sam told him to turn on the news, and they did. There was a bombing at the United Nations in Vienna. The first thought he had was that of panic, that Natasha had been harmed, or worse.

But, then came the surveillance camera footage, showing the current suspect in the bombing.