a quick upd8 so i can feel vaguely productive today

also it was HARD to find a beyonce song to fit the theme. also there's a lot of new charas texting but you can guess who they are? but if you can't guess, just ask! i'll be more than happy to tell you!

[to: the BEST boyfriend in the whole world]

reborn?

you're literally making me worry now

like holy shit? you're suddenly off the grid for no reason at all ? like-

it's been a week without any updates from you and we here at Vongola HQ just wants to know if you're okay?

no one, not even your handler, is getting anything ? like what the Fuck.

i mean?

i know you're not dead.

you can't be dead.

you promised you fucker. YOU PROMISED? it's bad to break a promise when you're part of the mafia you know. you taught me that.

just-

reply.

let us know you're okay and not doing injured or something

EVEN LAMBO'S WORRYING?

oh my god have you dumped me?

ok, bianchi says if you've dumped me my phone will explode please don't bomb my phone i have important shit saved here.

but, it's okay if you've dumped me.

we can still have a working and professional relationship.

i'll probably cry at night whenever we see each other though so

[to: the BEST boyfriend in the whole world]

what am i saying?

you're not the type of guy to do that?

sighs

i'm worried as fuck reborn.

no one's heard from you or the famiglia you were infiltrating?

not even the former arcobalenos?

i've asked dino and theres no word from the abbaticchio famiglia? there's no word on how they're doing or what they're up to so?

please.

i don't even care about the mission anymore. i don't even care about anything anymore.

just-

reply soon.

[to: the BEST boyfriend in the whole world]

I love you, you know?

that's probably a dangerous thing.

shit, how do I delete messages FUCK.

[to: ex-kid hitman]

Frankly, I don't know ? What the hell's up with you ?

But? Tsuna's like super fucking ? worried

And thus I'm worried

And everyone's worried because I'm also worried.

And it does take much to worry the god damn vongola rain guardian?

So like,

I'd appreciate if you, you know, reply back to everyone? Especially Tsuna?

I MEAN, just reply back to Tsuna because you know how he can be.

But like, I'm worried as hell too.

It's been a week.

And kid? You don't usually just drop off the grid like that.

You don't stop updating us on your mission just like that.

You probably don't like me lecturing you but what the hell.

You won't probably reply anyways.

I'll fucking send you rain memes if you don't reply to Tsuna.

(I mean? the least u can do while on a mission is like keep us all, especially tsuna in the loop?)

[to: Tenth's lover]

Reborn, I have nothing but utmost respect for you.

Although, would it be too hard to reply to us? Vongola Intel?

Or perhaps the Tenth-? You know you're lover.

WHY THE HELL AM I TAKING A POLITE TONE?

YOU DONN'T EVEN DESERVE A POLITE TONE?

Okay, maybe you do because you're the strongest hitman, a pillar in this mafia world.

BUT?

WHAT KIND OF STRONGEST HITMAN?

strongest hitman more like a SHITTY HITMAN

Just fucking text Tenth. Even if you don't reply to us.

(actually, on another note, please reply back to us because Vongola Intel is serious about keeping track on every Vongola member we have that goes out on a mission)

(that includes you, Reborn.)

(Say that you're a freelance hitman all you want, but we all know you're an honorary Vongola member)

(After all you know about the Vongola Christmas Party of 2015 fiasco)

(dios mio, just be safe Reborn. The Tenth's worried to death and doing all his paperwork and the paperwork that he isn't supposed to do nor touch?)

[to: MEANIE REBORN]

fucc?

like what kind of Shit.

like?

is it really too hard to have like?

can't you like do anything better than u kno?

make everyone worry?

especially tsuna-nii? like shit reborn tsuna-nii is a god damn ray of sunshine (skyshine?) and like he gives me candy even if I'm not deserving so? he's literally the purest person ever how are you even dating him?

YOU KNOW HOW HE GETS WHEN HE'S WORRIED?

i'm probably gonna regret this bc you're probably not ded

but on the chance that you're ded

fuck you ? honestly?

bye?

[to: EXTREMELY STRONG KID]

YO KID.

OUR EXTREMELY BELOVED BOSS IS EXTREMELY SAD SO?

BE A MAN AND LIKE? TALK TO HIM AND APOLOGIZE?

LIKE IS THAT EXTREMELY HARD?

ALL OF US HERE ARE EXTREMELY TRYING TO DO OUR BEST?

YOU DO KNOW I STILL HAVE PICTURES FROM THE EXTREMELY WILD PARTY OF THE VONGOLA CHRISTMAS PARTY OF 2015?

THE ONE WHERE YOU AND HIBARI WERE EXTREMELY KISSING?

ALSO

LIKE BASICALLY

EVERY EXTREME SHIT YOU'VE DONE IN THE PARTY I HAVE COPIES OF SO.

(DON'T ASK WHY I STILL HAVE THEM OR HOW I HAVE THEM)

REPLY BACK TO TSUNA PLEASE.

[to: former tutor]

this isn't like you.

what are you even doing?

[to: ex but we're kinda cool so it's ok]

you know you're throwing away the best thing that happened in your life right?

don't let Tsuna be ex#6

[to: carnivore]

did they do it?

[to: Vongola Cloud Guardian]

Yeah.

I may have to go off the grid for a month if everything goes well.

But if shit, then a year.

[to: carnivore]

hn. that's what you get.

[to: Vongola Cloud Guardian]

You know you can't tell anyone about this?

[to: carnivore]

yeah, I know.

everyone's going to be worried.

especially Tsuna

[to: Vongola Cloud Guardian]

Don't remind me. I didn't ask for you to be my moral compass but just my backup so I can return with less casualties and liabilities.

See you in a month or a year H.

Hopefully a month.

[to: carnivore]

likewise r.

the plot thickens!

but you probably guessed what's gonna happen since you're an amazing reader!