"You know for the whole year that we dated I tried to figure you out" Joey said brushing her long dark hair away from her face.  She was sitting on the dock next to the man who had made her a woman, who let her love him, who had taken away her inhibitions and let him love her completely.

"Ah, many have tried and failed Potter."  He said smiling and looking out into the sunset

She gave a little laugh and turned and looked at him.  She couldn't get over how handsome he was.  He was her first true love.  Sure, there had been Dawson but with Pacey it had been different.  Pacey made her see herself for what she was and not as part of the Dawson and Joey saga that had ruled her life since she was a kid.

"Well, here we are Witter, back in Capeside, a place we try so hard to escape yet we keep finding our way back here, why do you think that is?"

"The way I see it Potter, is that Capeside is our safety net.  When all else fails and the world throws all the crap that it has at us and we think that we just can't take anymore, we come back here and everything is all sugary and happy again.  Kind of like Dorothy, this is the Emerald City."

"Then why does she try so hard to get back to the crap."

"Because Potter, it's where she belongs.  The people that she loves most in the world are there.  She tried hard to get over the rainbow but when it comes down to it she wants the crap that life throws at her cause she knows that it's making her stronger."

"Ahh Pacey Witter the philosopher"

Joey sat and thought for a moment.  She had to say this before she lost her nerve

"Pace, do you ever think about us?"

 "Every day."  He sighed.  "But we're friends, I have too."

"That's not what I meant"

"What do you mean?  Do you mean do I think about us, about the way we were?"

"Yes!"

"Every day Jo, every day"

"What happened to us Pacey?"

"I guess life happened.  We went out an experienced a world that didn't revolve around you and Dawson."

She sighed heavily.  "You know for years I have had my relationship with Dawson used as an excuse.   I always felt like I was part of a saga.  Will they won't they get together and I'm tired of it.   I want to move on with my life I want to get away from the whole thing and I can't move on with my life if people keep bringing him into the relationship.  Yes, he's one of my best friends and yes he's part of my life but both have us have moved on.  I've had flings with people, Wilder, Charlie, Eddie…"

"To name but a few…"

"And not to mention half the football team" They both chuckled.  "But you know there was always one person who I compared them all too.  It wasn't Dawson, it was you.  I never experienced the love that I had with you with anyone else that I've been with."

"Why are you telling me all this Jo?"  He was still staring at the horizon, the sun had disappeared.

"I was just wondering why we always end up back here.  I've finished college, you've got your career and yet somehow here we are sitting on the dock outside the B & B, in Capeside."

"Don't read too much into this Potter, I didn't know you were coming back to Capeside.  I came here just to say hey to my family cause I haven't seen them in a while but then I may as well have stayed in Boston cause they barely even noticed I was here.  Sure I shared a tete a tete with the Dougster and my father grunted in my direction a couple of times but that's as far as my family reunion went."

"Then why are you sitting on my dock Pacey?"

He stood up and looked over the water. 

"You want to know why I came back here.  Cause it's full of memories.  Sure, there are some good and some not so good but they are my memories. The one memory that stands out among all of them is seeing you for the first time.  Not the girl that I used to tease mercilessly but the girl that I fell in love, the girl that made me feel that I was the only man on this earth.  The girl that I bought a wall for.  The girl that I degraded in front of her friends, the girl that I made life hell for, for loving me.  Don't get me wrong Jo, I loved you, more than anyone else that ever came before you and probably more than anyone that comes after you, but us together, it was destructive.

"How can you say that?  We were both in completely different places.  We were kids for crying out loud.  We didn't know what the world had offer us."

"What are you saying?  I don't get where this is going.  Are you saying that you want us to get back together?"  he shouted frustrated at what she was saying.

She looked up at him and whispered.  "I don't know, Pacey.  I just don't know but sitting here with you beside me it just feels…."

"Right?"

She nodded and a single tear fell from her eye.

"Joey, please don't cry."  He took her face in his hands and wiped the tears away gently.

"I can't help it, sometimes you just get me so frustrated."

He laughed and looked her in the eye.  He could feel the electricity between them it took all the strength he had to pull away from her.

"Jo, I don't know what you want me to do."

"I haven't thought that far ahead.  I just know that I had to tell you how I felt."
"How long?"

"How long have I been feeling like this?"

He nodded.

"A while.  You remember the night that we stayed late at the bar just talking.  We talked all night."

He nodded again.

"It started then.  I just started to feel the excitement that I felt that day when we took off on True Love.  I just knew that I wanted to be with you."

Pacey sighed heavily.

They sat in silence and watched the moonlight bounce off the creek.