Author's Note: A huge thank you to all of my beta readers for polishing this story into the best version it can be. You guys are the best and bring such different perspectives to this story. It would not be the same without all of you. Thanks!

To my readers, I will try to update this story as quickly as possible. My goal is about every week, but don't be surprised if those seven days slide into ten or twelve. As always, reviews are welcomed with open arms and they do wonders for a writer's motivation when one is struggling with writer's block. I big pre-thank you to anyone who does review. You are awesome!

Some disclaimers, I own nothing in the Harry Potter universe. All of that can only come from the brilliant JK Rowling. This story is as canon-compliant as I can make it, at least until Cursed Child is released. After that, all of this becomes fanon and possibly AU. One final note, the story and chapter titles are all taken from Marianas Trench's "While We're Young". Give it a listen if you like good music.

Hope you enjoy the story!

Chapter One

i wish somehow we could go back to where we came

.

The interrogation room door opens too easily, swinging in at the slightest touch of my hand. I'm not ready to see him yet, but there he is, sitting in front of me, wrists bound together but resting in front of him as if he wanted them there anyways.

His grey-blue eyes widen a fraction of a centimetre when he sees me, the only indication my presence surprises him. His expression remains blank, the sharp lines of his nose and jaw unmoving as his gaze shifts behind me, waiting, maybe hoping, for someone to accompany me inside the interrogation room.

I close the door.

Scorpius gives no indication that he even knows me as I take the seat across from him, angling it away from the wall where they are watching us: Aurors Bones and Tyson, Lori Grayson, Albus, and Uncle Harry.

Scorpius knows Bones and Tyson better than I, and I can only imagine what it is like to have the Aurors in charge of your training overseeing your arrest and interrogation. Not only them, but your training partner and Head of your department as well. I don't even know if Scorpius knows that Lori Grayson is overseeing the entire investigation. Uncle Harry would have if he weren't personally involved in this case, and next in line would be the Head of Magical Law Enforcement, who also happens to be my mum. The Ministry had to climb all the way to the Senior Undersecretary to the Minister of Magic, and she takes her job very seriously.

I hope the flush that I feel crawling across my cheeks doesn't reach my ears. It took a lot of convincing to get me here today, but if my emotions get the best of me, I'll lose this chance to finally find the truth.

But being so close to him, the truth seems so unimportant. Only yesterday I kissed him, held him, slept in his bed. Today, he's arrested for the murder of my cousin.

~OoOoO~

I remember the first time I met Scorpius Malfoy.

Dad had just told me to never be friends with him and beat him in every exam. I think I despised him before I ever even saw him. So when he arrived at our compartment and Albus invited him in, shocked was the mildest word for what I was feeling.

I refused to talk to him the entire train ride, having made friends with two other first years who had asked to share our compartment as well. Isabel Krew and Samuel Wood, both children of famous Quidditch players, were much better company and would prove to be fine friends over the following years.

By the Sorting Ceremony, I'd forgotten that Scorpius had ridden with us at all until James caught my attention and gave a questioning look to him and Albus standing next to each other. All I could offer was a shrug, thinking I would have time to explain the whole situation after being put into Gryffindor.

The Sorting Hat messed that up, though, along with every other idea I had of what Hogwarts would be like. The one-sided conversation was going according to plan until the Hat paused to think.

"I see, yes, a very loyal and brave heart… and a willingness to work and an honest nature. Never told a lie, I see?"

I wanted to argue, but that would have been a lie.

I ended up in Hufflepuff with Molly, which lacked some surprise since it followed Scorpius being Sorted into Ravenclaw and, a few names after, Albus into Slytherin. There were lasting rumours that the Hat was losing its touch and needed to retire.

Albus made many attempts to bring Scorpius and me to better terms throughout our first few months at Hogwarts, but by the second Quidditch game, Hufflepuff versus Ravenclaw, Albus gave up. He left in the middle of the game, unable to stand our bickering anymore.

The most infuriating thing about Scorpius Malfoy, and there are many, is his unwavering composure. The more he recited past game statistics for the players on both sides, the more red my face became. The odds were so far against me that I would have dropped the topic and moved on to something more in my favour had he been anyone else, but Scorpius's words felt like a hook that dragged out a frustration and a need to prove myself that I had never felt before.

See, in my family, there aren't a lot of logical thinkers, especially on the Potter side. Ask any of them and you'll get a variation of "What does your gut/heart/conscience tell you?" Then all of them, especially Dad, would tell me how I rely too much on facts. Having them used against me, and worse, being unable to fight back, made me discover a new part of myself. I found a deep competitiveness I never exercised because no one before had been able to compete with me.

Perhaps that makes me sound arrogant, but it's the truth. Even my Ravenclaw cousins, Victoire and Fred, compliment my knowledge and creativity. Even bespectacled, nose-in-a-book Lucy admitted I could beat her number of O.W.L.s when the time came. Having Scorpius Malfoy best me sparked a dangerous fire.

"D'you see what you did?" I spat at him after Albus had walked away at the Quidditch game.

"I don't think the fault is all mine," he said, which only infuriated me more because he was right and I couldn't argue.

"Can't you at least try to be nice?"

"Can you?"

I restrained myself from hitting or hexing him even though I wanted to do both, multiple times, and instead glared at him as a spiteful storm of words whirled inside my mind and thundered out. "You're such a typical Malfoy! I don't know why the Sorting Hat tried to give you a chance in Ravenclaw."

I spun around with enough momentum to slap him across the face with the ends of my red curls, slipping into the crowd.

After that disaster, Albus spent his time keeping Scorpius and me apart. At meals, Albus had given up on dragging Scorpius to our table, where a slew of Houses sat. I've heard that, during my parents' time, the students respected the formality of sitting at their own House tables, but after a handful of students broke the unspoken rule, most notably Teddy when he sat next to Victoire at the Ravenclaw table, all the students started to mix together from then on. During my first year, the Slytherins still congregated together, but with Albus and Isabel in their ranks, they were soon with the rest of us.

Albus started to switch his meals between Scorpius and me, sitting next to me one day and with Scorpius the next. He split not only meals but trips on the train, Quidditch games, even Hogsmeade weekends after second year. I didn't have him every other day, as I would have done to keep it fair. Instead, he seemed to choose whichever one of us he felt less bothered by that day.

I hardly ever minded. By then, I had such a wide network of friends, I never wanted for company. I did make note of Scorpius's friends, mostly because none of them befriended me, but what I noticed most? That Jasper Zabini, Scorpius's cousin, and Caroline Nott were not among his friends. It almost made me hate Scorpius more that I couldn't bunch him with the rest of the blood purists.

For the next four years, despite never talking directly to him, he remained a spot in my life. When final exams were over, I listened to enough hearsay to discover he had beaten me as top of the class, an honour I hadn't even thought to fight for. I'd only gotten an E in History of Magic because, really, who paid attention to Binns? Well, after my first year, I never missed another word that ghost said.

Going into third year, I was proud to say Scorpius and I were tied as far as marks were concerned, but then I made the mistake of trying out for the Quidditch team. I never even thought to worry about making it. I'd been trained by my best cousins: Dominique, Molly, James, and Roxanne.

I only made reserve.

And Scorpius? Oh, of course he made his House team. As Seeker. Bloody brilliant.

The next year, I was made Keeper, but by then, all the resentment I felt towards Scorpius while watching him soar around the pitch from the sidelines and hoping Owen Weaver got a Bludger to the head so I could play, had built up from a mild spark to a smouldering flame of hatred.

When I received my Prefect badge, I felt that I might have finally won the competition and achieved something Scorpius had not, until a few days later when Albus warned me that Scorpius had also been made a Prefect. I cursed, knowing that meant I would see him at meetings and, to make matters worse, have to patrol with him.

I planned on asking Louis, the Head Boy that year, to keep us as far away from each other as possible. Instead, Albus trapped us in the same compartment on the train.

"This is the worst idea you've ever had," I told him after taking the window seat and scrunching myself as close to the wall as I could get. "Can I please leave?"

Albus glared at me from his seat next to the door, playing guard. "No."

"C'mon, Al, I promise you anything if you let me go." I batted my eyelashes at him, but he didn't waver. I went in for the kill. "I'll put in a good word about you to Cassie."

Albus's green eyes lit up at the name, and for a moment, I had him. Cassie McLaggen, my closest Gryffindor friend, had caught the eye of my cousin back in second year, and he'd been pining after her ever since. While she held a liking for Quidditch players, she also seemed to only fancy those in her own House. I could change her mind.

"No, Rose," Albus said, shaking his head. "You are not leaving."

I wanted to scream, but I settled on groaning as loudly and obnoxiously as I could, throwing my head back against the seat. "Can't I just tell you how this is going to end? No matter how many hours we sit here, Scorpius and I are never going to be friends."

Scorpius sat between us on the opposite bench, a stoic expression on his face as he watched the two of us argue. The left side of his mouth pulled up in a grin but the right was slightly down-turned in a frown. I would later learn it was the most uncomfortable expression Scorpius ever wore.

The thing about Scorpius Malfoy is that he's harder to read than anyone I've ever met. He mastered the art of detached indifference when he was young, or so he told me once. It's a habit he picked up from his parents, even without them encouraging it. I imagined his family like one of the old portraits, all the occupants raising an eyebrow at their watchers' antics while remaining unimpressed themselves.

Albus and I, however, tended to be open with our emotions. I glared at him. He glared at me. Neither of us wanted to look away first.

But where I was stubborn, Albus was compromising.

He sighed as he dropped his gaze. "Look, I am not asking you to be best mates. All I ask is that you be cordial in each other's presence."

"We're cordial!" I shot back, standing up.

Albus mirrored me. "Cordial is not shouting."

Scorpius cleared his throat from his seat. "I don't believe I've partaken in any shouting. May I go?"

"No," Albus and I yelled in unison. Scorpius pursed his lips in response.

The interruption was enough to calm both of us down and sit again, though I glued my gaze out the window. Albus attempted to make conversation, all of it revolving around various Quidditch cups: The Montrose Magpies winning the European Cup but losing the League Cup to Puddlemere United, the upcoming World Cup that would happen next summer, Ravenclaw stealing the cup from Gryffindor after their best season in a decade at the end of the previous year. But Scorpius kept his comments short and uninviting. I refused to speak at all. Albus quickly gave up and fell silent.

After a few minutes, Scorpius stood, announcing he had patrol duty next and left the compartment. My gaze followed him out, then rested on Albus. "Did you really think that would work?" I asked.

"I hoped," he said, settling into a more comfortable position in his seat. "I did think it might be nice to have a year where my two best mates got along."

Oh, the guilt tactic. Albus knew just where to strike. I thought about telling him that it was a miracle a Malfoy was friends with a Potter and that he shouldn't push his luck trying to add a Weasley to the mix, but I knew he'd argue that Potters were known for fate working in their favour.

"I don't make promises I can't keep," I warned him, but he smiled, knowing what I meant. I would make no promises, but I would try not to yell at Scorpius as much.

I didn't have to see Scorpius again the rest of the train ride, having patrol duty after him then escaping Albus's attention as he went to his own patrol duty. Really, I didn't see much of Scorpius for nearly two months. Louis did a fantastic job giving us differing duties until Scorpius messed it up and switched midnight patrols with Cassie so she could attend the Hufflepuff Halloween party without interruption.

No one really knows how the Halloween celebration became the legend it was when I was in school. I think it started with someone just wanting to have a party before the first Quidditch match of the year. The Slytherins and Gryffindors would be too busy with practices to plan one, and Ravenclaws aren't really known for their fun-loving nature. All responsibilities fell to us Hufflepuffs, and the first one must have gone well because there'd been one ever since.

Now, on most occasions, I'm a well-organized person and never forget anything - I make lists for a reason - but there are times when I try to avoid a task so avidly that I procrastinate writing it down until the very last moment.

And then there are even rarer times when that task never makes it to parchment, like the time I forgot about my midnight patrol on Halloween night with Scorpius Malfoy.

By the time midnight came around, I was flitting from group to group, taking sips from others' drinks as I went. I'd grown tired and light-headed enough to plop myself on the armrest of Albus's chair to watch Sam Wood and Troy Spinnet play Exploding Snap, though with their slowed reflexes, there was a lot more exploding than snapping. I flung my head back in a laugh when all the cards in Troy's hand combusted at once, patrol the farthest thing from my mind.

Until a pair of long fingers tapped my shoulder.

I whirled around, feeling the end of my hair whip across the person behind me, and came face-to-face with Scorpius Malfoy. Well, face-to-face would be a generous statement on my part. It was more face-to-chest since all the height in my family skipped over me and he'd gained every inch of his parents' heights. It was one of many annoying characteristics about him.

"What're you doing here?" I said.

"I came to find you," he said. "We have patrol tonight."

I cursed under my breath at the same time Troy and Sam broke into fits of laughter.

"Skiving off your Prefect-ly duties already?" Sam teased.

"You can scratch Head Girl off your to-do list now," Troy added between chortles.

At the same time, Albus and I tossed a couple of Stinging Hexes their way to shut them up, giving each other admiring looks as Sam ducked behind his hand of cards and Troy fell over the back of his chair.

"Guess I better be off then," I said, bumping shoulders with Albus before standing and ushering for Scorpius to lead the way out. With his back turned, he couldn't see that I stayed a few paces behind him, dodging glances and hoping no one would see me leaving with him. There were enough rumours about me at the time, and I didn't want to add any more.

"Oi, Rosie!"

I cringed at the sound of the person whose name was next to mine in the most prominent gossip. I looked over to see Ashton Peakes walking towards me, though I'm not sure I'd call what he was doing walking. He was tall and burly and used those around him like a railing as his tipsy steps caused him to sway.

Some things to know about Ashton? At this time, he was a seventh year Hufflepuff and Captain of the Quidditch team. He's also the only person besides my family that calls me "Rosie." Oh, and in my fourth year, there had been a rumour that I only made the Quidditch team because he fancied me.

I tried not to take offence against my flying skills.

"There's m'favourite Qui'itch star!" he slurred, stumbling to a stop in front of me. I leant a hand in steadying him before he toppled over on a lot of second years. "Nah leaving without saying goodbye, are ya?" he asked, putting an arm over my shoulders for balance. It really was no wonder why his girlfriend despised me.

"I'll be back," I told him, attempting to steer him in the direction of a good babysitter. "Before you get too pissed to make memories, I promise."

"Oh, I shee, sneaking out for a quick shag, eh? With… that's nah Malfoy, is it?"

I gave him a withering look. "You're disgusting, and no. I'm on midnight patrol."

"Pfft, prefect stuff. Come an' have a drink."

"I'm going," I said, setting him off in the direction of some sixth and seventh years that included Roxanne, knowing they'd take of him till I got back. "Goodbye." He waved as he staggered towards the group.

When I turned around, Scorpius stood less than a meter away, a slight quirk of his left eyebrow and a wrinkle at the right corner of his mouth. I stabbed a finger at his chest, taking the expression as smug. "There is nothing to those rumours, so don't look at me like there is." I grabbed a handful of his shirt, an uncomfortable formal looking thing for the weekend, and yanked him out of the room.

I headed straight up the staircase to the Entrance Hall, hoping to keep ahead of Scorpius, but he kept pace with his long strides. I shot glares at him. Having him stay beside me so easily while I worked up a sweat was about as frustrating as working for top class and only making second or training all summer and not making the team while Scorpius just walked onto the field and made Seeker.

I said nothing as we walked through the corridors, not having anything to say to him, but the quiet was killing me. Every thought in my mind begged to come out of my mouth, and I pressed my lips together so hard they hurt. I could only take it so long before I started rambling.

"I feel like I have to explain the whole Ashton situation since it seems most everyone here wants to write me off as a slag." Scorpius gave no indication that he wanted me to continue, but I did anyways. "See, in third year when I was made reserve, Ashton took a liking to me. He wasn't even Captain then, but I think he wanted me to make the team. We would go down to the Pitch any chance we got, and he helped me."

Scorpius was silent, and I thought for a moment that he wouldn't say anything. Then he asked, "How does a Chaser train a Keeper?"

"He actually taught me to be a better Chaser. Something about 'knowing your opponent' and such. I dunno why it worked, but it did. And I probably shouldn't have told you that," I said, glancing at him in hopes for some kind of promise that he wouldn't pass that on to his own Quidditch team. His face was blank, unreadable to me at the time, so I kept going. "Anyways, I guess more people noticed our disappearances than I thought, because when I made the team last year, everyone assumed it was because we were dating. When it became obvious we weren't, the gossip got a lot nastier. Which is absolute rubbish. I spent years training, and that accomplishment got dwindled down to snogging. Not to mention that it completely ruined my dating life."

"I doubt it was only the rumour that did that."

"What's that supposed to mean? Are you calling me undateable?"

"Not at all." Again, with the calm responses while I flared up. "But you are quite the legend around Hogwarts. I imagine you intimidate most."

I blinked at him, hearing the words but unable to connect words like "legend" and "intimidating" to me. I was a short little thing with a too high-pitched voice and an emotional range that made me useless in a situation requiring a cool demeanour. Who the hell would be scared of me?

Scorpius understood my silence meant confusion and carried on. "You are one of the greatest Keepers at Hogwarts. You only let in two goals last year and are guaranteed to be Captain next year. You were made a Prefect, and everyone knows the Head Girl position is yours. And you have incredibly high marks in all your classes. I would not be surprised if you made top of our class."

I scoffed at the last one. "That'd be a bloody miracle. Unless, of course, you're dropping out."

"I was not planning on that," he said, seemingly genuinely confused at the statement. "But I do think after O.W.L.'s, you could surpass me."

"Why's that?"

"I expect to have a rather heavy load of N.E.W.T. courses."

"And you don't think I will?" I hadn't been planning on it, but I would've signed up for every N.E.W.T.-level lesson possible if it meant having more than him.

"I have no idea. What career are you striving for?"

"Career?" I scoffed. "Well, I guess I should know that by now… I dunno." The whole concept of a future and job seemed so far away until that point. "How do you decide what you want to do forever anyway?"

"I suppose one figures out what makes them truly happy."

He said it like it was the simplest thing in the world, and maybe for other people, it was. I, however, never thought much about what made me happy. "Well, there's lots of things that make me happy," I mused. "I enjoy all of my lessons and flying, of course. Being with friends, being with family, reading a good book. I don't do much in my life that doesn't make me happy."

"Which is most likely because you live off the happiness of others." I stumbled in my surprise at his words, shooting him a look of shock that he must have mistook for malice because he added, "Just an observation."

His haughty tone ignited that fire of anger in me. "If you think you're telling me something I don't know about myself then you're wrong." I quickened my pace for a second or two before coming down from my rush of anger. As my steps slowed, my voice softened. "I've always had a lot of attention drawn to me, whether I did something to deserve it or not. There was a Daily Prophet article written about me on the day I was born. My entire family has certain expectations of me: brightest witch of my age, Head Girl, Quidditch captain. Everything. And when I meet those expectations, yes, there's nothing that makes me happier. And I've known that for a while," I added quickly, not wanting him to think he helped me discover some new part of myself.

"But," I continued, "making your family proud isn't exactly a job."

We walked together for a quiet minute, our footsteps no longer competing against each other but settling into a matching rhythm. I started to roam my mind for a new topic of conversation when Scorpius said, "So what would you do if no one would ever see or hear about it? There must be some activity that would bring you happiness by simply doing it."

Yes, there must be, but what was it? It was a tougher question than on any exam. I barely knew who I was, living for what everyone told me they enjoyed. The school work and revising were for the marks that would bring proud smiles to my parents' faces. Quidditch was for the cheers. I couldn't imagine playing a game that my friends would never hear about. Even during my private lessons with Ashton, I'd flown to hear him say, "Curse it all, you're amazing."

"I don't know," I finally answered. "That may be the strangest and maddest thing you've ever heard, but honestly, I don't know what would genuinely make me happy."

"I think not knowing is normal, if a little sad."

"Thanks for the honesty," I grumbled as we ascended a staircase to the second floor, but on my last word, the staircase lurched to the right. I slammed into the bannister while Scorpius nearly crashed into me, coming up short only because of the length of his arms, which were able to reach around me and brace against the railing. Our close proximity was gone as soon as we were steadied, which was quick considering we'd been battling these stairs for over four years, but I felt something new swirling around in my chest when my nose brushed against the collar of his button-down, something stirring where my fire of hatred had once lived.

My mind flashed to our conversation, feeling like I'd been talking to an old friend rather than to Scorpius Malfoy. I had no words to describe the closeness I felt towards him, and not the brief physical closeness we had shared. It felt as if the fire of hate had smouldered to embers, the smoke drifting out of my ribs and floating to him, connecting us.

That description may seem a little intense for the moment, so emphasis on the "smoke" part.

Whatever it was, it drew words out of me. "I mean it, though. Thanks for being honest."

"Can I say one more honest thing?" he asked as we left the stairs behind. "Being honest is not normally a character trait of mine."

"Maybe I'm rubbing off on you," I teased, trying to lighten the mood before I darkened it again. "Or at least enough to get one more honest answer from you?"

He inclined his head, though it seemed more a sign of curiosity than affirmation. I went for it anyway. "It was me this whole time, wasn't it?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean the whole fighting and competing thing between us. It started because my family expected it to happen, and we already discussed me and my family's expectations." I stopped our patrol to look him in the eye when I asked, "You never had an issue with me, did you?"

"No, I never did."

"Right," I said, ducking my gaze away from his. "Okay, yeah, I guess I'll go down this way and you go down that way. Make this patrol go a bit faster?"

He nodded, glancing from me to the corridor I suggested, then started down the corridor alone. He glanced back. "I apologise if I said something to upset you."

"Upset me?" I cursed myself for making it sound like I wanted away from him, but I smiled anyways, feeling strangely happy that I had enough of a hold on him to make him care about my emotional wellbeing. "You just gave me a lot to think about."

"Well, you know how us Ravenclaws can be."

"Did you just make a joke?" I asked in disbelief, looking up to see a small but definite crooked smirk on his face, giving him just the glimpse of smugness that my parents always warned me ran in the Malfoy family.

"I can be funny on occasion." The crookedness of his mouth straightened into a genuine smile for just a second. This would be the first moment I saw the way his right eye crinkled when the right side of his mouth lifted, the reason he always smiled with only one side of his lips, but I did not know yet how few people had seen it or how familiar it would become over the years.

No, at that moment, all I could focus on was his retreating form, noticing for the first time that he walked with his hands in his pockets and in the exact centre of the corridor.

When I started walking in the opposite direction, I felt an ache in my cheeks that took me a while to figure out meant I was smiling wider than I had in ages. I even felt my mouth to make sure it was really there, then forced it away as fast as I could.

~OoOoO~

What to say in this situation? I was never good with words, I never had to be, but it's clear Scorpius is waiting for me to make the first move in this delicate game. This calls for strategy, a talent I lack. I charge head first into things and figure it out as I go. I want to blurt out, "Please, Scorpius, tell me the truth. Did you kill her?"

But that won't do any good. According to my Uncle Harry, Scorpius hasn't said a word since he was arrested. I'm the last resort and, five minutes in, I'm failing miserably.

I glance towards the door, expecting it to open at any moment to either Ms Grayson finding this meeting too inappropriate to continue or Auror Tyson saying this is a waste of time. They've already said both, but Uncle Harry and Auror Bones insisted that if they wanted to find out how deep this case went, they needed to use every advantage they had to get Scorpius to talk.

And if I fail? Scorpius will be sent to Azkaban for life and, if any of his hints these past few years mean what I think, my entire family could be killed, including me. Especially me.

See, I was the one who was supposed to be in Diagon Alley that day, not Molly. No one besides the two of us knows that, and I will not tell anyone else because there's something they wouldn't understand: if it weren't for Scorpius, I would have been there. I would be dead.

I have to make him say the right things, the whole truth, because I know he's innocent. He has to be. Failing is not an option.

"D'you know why I'm here?" I ask, hoping to sound authoritative and confident but coming out desperate instead.

I stare at him, keeping our eyes locked, hoping I can bring out that honesty that he claims to only have with me. He's never lied to me, not even a white lie, not a single untruth. But to get him to be honest, I have to get him to speak first. My blue eyes are pleading, begging, screaming at him to answer me. Please, answer me.

His face is unmoving but his stormy eyes never stay still. They stray from my gaze for a moment before gravitating back. Neither of us blinks. We are still but a battle is happening, not only between our eyes but between that connection in our chests that formed on that staircase so many years ago. It's been broken quite a few times, but here we are again, mending it.

I feel the exact moment it returns to steel.

"Yes."

End Note: Please let me know your thoughts! This story has been in my head for a very, very long time and finally getting to write it and bring it to you guys is such a relief. I hope that you enjoy reading this story as much as I am enjoying writing it!