AN: ...I'm just gonna leave this here.

Chapter 6: Umami

Shadow was confused. Probably not as much as Sonic was right now, but still.

Sonic loved him.

Sonic loved him.

Sonic the freaking Hedgehog loved him.

Shadow felt as if his brain was short-circuiting, failing to comprehend just how something like that could have happened. Was this some kind of cosmic joke that he didn't understand? How could Sonic, probably the most lovable person on the face of the planet, have taken liking in someone like him, a bad-tempered antagonistic loner that for the most part had only ever traded punches and insults with him? It just didn't make sense to Shadow.

Just...how?

He had never been kind to Sonic; at best he was neutral—and only when the situation called for it—but majority of the time he undoubtedly spend being downright hostile to the hero. To this day, he doesn't really understand what had driven Sonic to keep coming back and trying to befriend him.

Sure, Sonic was always offering olive branches left and right, but all Shadow had ever done with them was take them, break them in half and then even set them on fire to add salt to the injury. Why would Sonic want to even associate with someone like him? Had Sonic truly believed that if he was being insistent enough that Shadow would change his tune eventually? He knew that Sonic was optimist through and through, but that...

Well, clearly not so much of an optimist at the moment, a voice in his mind pointed out, the miserable image of the bandaged-up hero he had seen just ten minutes ago flashing through his mind. A scowl marred Shadow's lips as he recalled the dejected slump of the blue shoulders and the odd emptiness that filled him when Sonic's voice came out void of its usual cheerfulness and instead filled with reluctant resignation.

Sonic thought he hated him..

Shadow wasn't sure why that one hit him as hard as it had. Why had he been surprised? Of course, Sonic would think that considering what the majority of their interactions looked like. But still...

Back before all of this, Sonic had never seemed bothered by any of the many insults or comments Shadow kept throwing into his face, the hero coming back to him again and again to try to poke through his defenses and reach him, seemingly just brushing off the whole name-calling. It had never occurred to him that Sonic might not shake himself off from the experience like he'd always do with Dr. Eggman after a battle.

Though he supposed things like these were harder to just brush off when you had feelings for the other person...

Shadow wondered. Would he have said the same things if he knew that Sonic actually took them to heart? Probably not...

He hadn't meant for his word to actually hurt Sonic, only to wound the hero's pride enough that Sonic would fight him. Anger was emotion that was most familiar to Shadow and so getting into shouting matches with Sonic was a way for him to get his mind off other things; when he'd finally regained back his memories he'd had a lot of time to self-reflect on his emotions and try to sort through his issues—which hadn't really gone well as he didn't really know how to handle it all—and when he'd actually taken up the Commander's offer to join GUN, the stress of his job just added fuel to that emotional turmoil.

However, then Sonic had come along, unknowingly offering him a let-out for all this build-up. Shadow knew he ought to have been more reasonable and not manipulating Sonic into distracting him from his his personal issues regardless of how 'harmless' it might have seemed to him...

He let out a bitter laugh. Was this how his whole life was going to be spend? Wrecking the life of others? Bringing misery where he goes? After all, all of this, could have been prevented if he let himself open up just the slightest, just asked Sonic to help him distract himself with a fight instead of cowardly hiding behind his walls and throwing insults in Sonic's face in hope of getting the same result...

Red eyes glanced to the green gem that he still held in his hand, a reminder he had once more been a coward, opting to to flee before Sonic could even have a chance respond to what he had said instead of staying and offering Sonic the same honesty he had demanded from the hero—honesty that made Sonic confess his love for a person that he thought hated him...

Gloved hand curled tightly around the powerful gem in its grasp as Shadow considered his options of what to do now. Being honest himself was the smallest apology he could offer for forcing Sonic to literally bare his heart to him and all the stuff he had put Sonic through. But that wouldn't do. There had to be something else...

-O-

Guests were a kind of rare thing to witness in the heroes' household. Considering the (to most people inconvenient) placement of their house at the edge of forest, far from any kind of civilization, they had a very few visits from their friends as most people counted on them to make their way to them instead.

Therefore, when somebody loudly knocked on their door early in the morning, Sonic was reasonably confused.

Sonic didn't particularly feel like playing a host right now and would rather have some time for himself after all that had transpired in the last few days. However, knowing Tails was most likely still dozing off after the long flight they had yesterday, he knew he couldn't count on his friend to do that and so he just pushed himself off the couch, grabbed the crutch and limped over to the door to greet the mysterious visitor, pondering who it could be; Tails promised not to tell anybody of his 'accident', so it definitely couldn't be Amy coming to take care of him in the meantime or something similar...

Then again, Amy probably wouldn't yet want to see him even if she knew he was injured...

Sighing, Sonic opened the door, not having expectations of who to expect to see on the other side. But despite having no expectations, it still somehow surprised him to see Shadow standing there of all possible people.

A mixture of apprehension and curiosity twisted the hero's stomach as he took in the other's stiff body posture and the almost unnoticeable jitteriness of the gloved fingers tightly curled around black arms. The air felt tense but Shadow lacked his usual hostile aura, so Sonic took the liberty to scratch the option of the agent looking for a fight off the list of the possible reasons behind his visit.

Sonic felt a bit of his own tension melting off at that, but still he remained on guard, not knowing what to expect of the other.

"I was a total jerk," fell from the agent's lips just a moment later and it was enough to convince Sonic that he, indeed, had absolutely no idea what to expect from Shadow anymore.

Then it struck him. "...I'm dreaming again, aren't I?" he voice aloud, considering that the most likely explanation; just because the imaginary Shadow had given himself a vacation after his run-in with the real deal, didn't mean he wouldn't come back at some point, right?

A frown marred Shadow's face at the hero's flippant disregard of his attempt at apology. "Do us both a favor and pinch yourself."

Sonic blinked in surprise. Shadow sounded annoyed. That was unusual for the imaginary Shad. Green eyes looked up the agent up and down once more, the hero even giving himself a small pinch on the arm. "...It is you," he said in the end when Shadow didn't actually dissolve into a thin air.

"Yes," Shadow hissed, clearly aggravated. But realizing how he had sounded, the agent forced himself to rein his anger in, his tone neutral as he added, "I've come here to talk."

"Talk?"

"Apologize, to be precise. For..." Shadow shifted uncomfortably on his feet, glancing away as he tried to formulate his thoughts. "...being a jerk and all that..."

"You've come here to apologize..." Sonic repeated, surprised green eyes watching as the other continued to awkwardly shift his body weight and red eyes barely meeting his, the display so different from the arrogant demeanor Shadow normally carried himself with.

Sonic pinched himself again to double check he really wasn't dreaming. But, nope, Shadow was still there.

Clearly taking his silence as a signal to proceed, Shadow started to explain, red eyes locking with Sonic's again. "I realize my behavior was...reprehensible. I was a jerk and treated you poor even though you did nothing wrong—I won't deny that." There was a pause. "However, I just wanted to say it was not out of malice towards you—I don't hate you," Shadow stressed. "...I hate myself."

"I..." Sonic was at loss of words; he had never been blind to Shadow's general dislike for people...but it never occurred to him that Shadow might included himself in the group. And it was not just that he dislike himself but hate himself...and when you knew Shadow, you knew that he wasn't one to exaggerate...

"You weren't supposed to get caught in the crossfire of my misery. That was never my intention. I just... I..." Shadow paused, clearly trying to collect his scattered thoughts, dark brows furrowing and lips automatically twisting into a scowl when they continued to elude him. Sonic was sure the agent had rehearsed his speech before he came here—he was the type of person to do that—but the fact he was struggling now... Well, it very clearly said that Shadow was genuinely trying to apologize. There wasn't the distant coldness and business like manner when you delivered a sorry you didn't really mean but instead wild emotions getting worse of you...

Nonetheless, that didn't mean he was going to forgive the agent right now on the spot. Even for someone like Sonic, it was impossible not to feel just a tiny bit of indignation for Shadow for having treated him so poorly for all this time. One apology was not going to erase history.

However, Sonic wasn't one to hold grudges—especially, not if the other person made genuine effort to make amends. If Shadow continued to work for his forgiveness, he would be willing to give it to him after some time. But the agent needed to work for that.

"—Fighting you was my way of coping with things," Shadow added finally and the way the red eyes flashed told Sonic that these 'things' encompassed way more than just Shadow's hate for himself. Most likely the frustration with how the world had changed so drastically while he was in stasis...and that all the people he had once known were actually gone now...

A pang of sympathy twinged in Sonic's chest at the thought. Was that why Shadow was lashing out all the time? Because everything was just wrong and there was no way for him to fix it...?

After all, it was easier to be angry than sad...

"In retrospect, I see it was a spectacularly bad one." Shadow gave a dry, empty laugh and Sonic felt that pang again when the crimson eyes met his. They had always seemed so intense when they burned with anger during their fights. Now they were just as intense but burned instead with sadness and regret. Though if you didn't look close enough you'd might mistake their look for the former.

Sonic wondered whether he might have mistaken that look sometime in the past.

Shadow took a deep breath, re-composing himself again. "I don't expect you to forgive me. I just figured I should set things straight and try to make up for I've done."

It was at this point that Shadow took out a a Chaos Emerald from his quills, the gem glowing faintly in his hand. Figuring the other planned to use it to teleport himself away, Sonic felt a bit offended at Shadow trying to cut his apology short, however it quickly changed to surprise when Shadow instead gestured to his bandaged-up leg.

"I can heal that for you if you want," the agent offered and even though he tried to hide it, it was obvious the hero's answer mattered to him.

However, Sonic himself was too excited for the news to really note that. "Wait, you can use a Chaos Emerald to heal my leg?" he asked to confirm he had understood right. Shadow nodded.

"Neat!" A grin spread across the peach's lips. He wouldn't have to wait weeks for it to heal!

A bit of the tension disappeared from Shadow's posture at his enthusiastic reaction, but the other's nervosity of the lack of 'no' or 'yes' from him was still quite obvious. Therefore, Sonic just said, "Well, I can't say 'no' to an offer like that, can I? Get right in!"

Then he gestured dramatically into the house. Shadow looked a bit surprised—At what, Sonic wasn't sure. Maybe that he was being friendly with him?—regardless the agent entered the house. Sonic closed the door and with the help of the crutch limped into the living room, Shadow trailing right behind him. Once there Shadow instructed him to sit on the sofa and prop his leg up on the low coffee table, which Sonic did. Shadow sat himself in an armchair so he wouldn't have to stand during the whole procedure.

Then Shadow explained to him what exactly he was going to do. It sounded pretty simple to Sonic but for whatever reason Shadow still seemed a bit tense as if he expected to be thrown out any second now.

Therefore, Sonic tried to elevate the atmosphere. Just as Shadow was about to start, he nudged the other, giving a friendly grin when the crimson eyes turned him. "What do you say to a race after we're done here?" he asked, wanting to show the other he wanted to associate with him even after they finished this—by once again offering an olive branch as he was known to do.

Shadow let out an exhale that bordered on a relieved sigh. When the red eyes met his again, they held a hint of an emotion Sonic had not seen in them before—playfulness.

"Well, I can't say 'no' to an offer like that, can I?" Shadow returned his words to him, tan lips twitching ever so slightly. Sonic felt his stomach do things at that. He inconspicuously tried to pinch himself. Shadow stayed where he was.

Sonic let out a chuckle escape him. "You bet."