Summary: Tag to 1x01 - In the aftermath of Jess' death, Sam wants to do nothing more than block out the world forever. Dean tries to offer reassurance to his little brother.
It felt like they had been driving for hours when only twenty minutes had actually passed since his whole world had literally gone into flames around him. He was sat in the Impala, head resting against the cold, condensated window riding out the vibrations as they drove through the night. He was sure that there couldn't possibly be any more water in his body left for him to cry out. His hands were still shaking, and so was his frame as he tightly gripped the edge of the leather bench with one hand. His breath would hitch every so often as he screwed his eyes closed.
Jess was gone.
Dean had pulled him from the room they once shared together and out the front door. He had been unaware of his brother's return to the apartment until hands gripped him by the shoulders and forcively pulled him from the scene.
When they made it outside, Sam had swung a punch at his brother for not allowing him to attempt saving Jess and Dean had let it strike his chest instead of blocking it. Sam couldn't stand the look of sheer sympathy and pity on his brother's face, and on any other day would have set about wiping it from him with a comment, but he didn't care. Seeing the pain in Dean's expression too just made everything evermore real. It cemented the fact that it wasn't a dream, it was reality, and it had happened to him. Jess was dead, and he was alone.
Well...maybe not fully alone.
When his anger had drained and his emotions simply became too strong to contain, Sam had broken down. He quickly found himself being pulled in close to his brother's arms. Sam rested his head against his brother's shoulder as he sobbed painfully, Dean tracing 'O-K-A-Y' onto his back in comfort over and over again. They had stayed like this for a few minutes before Dean had guided him to the Impala.
Dean had tried to offer reassurance but Sam had simply closed his eyes and leant against the window. He hated how easily Sam could block out the world, but simply accepted that his little brother needed some time to process everything that had happened and so simply fired up the ignition and got them both out of there.
Looking over at his little brother, Dean took in his appearance. Pale with red eyes from crying, Sam was shaking and unbeknownst to him, whimpering lightly. He sighed before gently tapping him on the shoulder gently, pulling him away from his own mind.
Sam looked up and over at with lifeless eyes.
"Sammy." He spoke softly.
And that was all it took before Sam once again began to cry.
Dean reached out and pulled his little brother closer so that he was resting against his side as he kept his other hand on the wheel.
'Nowhere' He signed before bringing his hand up to his chest. 'Me nowhere'
And with that, a small smile came to Sam's lips before he buried closer into Dean's side.
'You are so strong. We get through this together'
'I feel like I want to die'
Dean's heart wrenched.
'You can't do that, remember? Years ago you made deal'
Sam sighed.
'Anyway, if you go, I go'
"D'n..." The youngest Winchester grumbled, and in any other situation, Dean would have rolled his eyes and groaned back. But in this instance, he couldn't be happier.
Scared that the death of Jess would cause his little brother to shut down, Dean knew he had to get Sam talking as quick as possible, and he'd managed, even if it was just a groan.
It marked stone number one.
He knew he was going to have to be vigilant. In the back of Dean's mind there was always a worry that Sam was going to do something stupid. Again. And he was never going to let that happen if he could do anything to stop it. Which meant reassuring his little brother with everything he had to make sure that Sam grieved as healthily as possible.
Sam, obviously having sensed concern in his older brother looked up at him.
"Jerk." He spoke up, simply.
A smile came to Dean's face in an instant.
"Bitch."