I own nothing of Major Crimes. I only borrow the characters from time to time.

Parenthood

Ricky Raydor drummed his fingers against the steering wheel. Occasionally, his eyes would dart between the red stoplight and his mother sitting in the passenger seat beside him sipping tea. A heavy sigh escaped his lips as he silently rebuked himself for thinking the conversation he wanted to have was a good idea. He caught her, from the corner of his eye, looking wistfully out the window. He could only imagine what she was thinking. He swallowed hard and hoped, for his own sake, he would choose his words wisely.

Sharon took a sip of tea from the "to go" cup from the small café near the beach. As she looked out the window at the passing scenery, the excitement of a surprise visit from her son gave way to an uneasiness. He was in a hurry to pick her up, said little while they sipped their drinks, and seemed anxious to leave. She watched as he fidgeted in his seat. "Okay, out with it. What's wrong?"

"Why do you think something is wrong?" he shrugged as he avoided eye contact.

"I know you and something is wrong." She sighed, "Besides, I'm not the captain of the best of the best detectives for nothing." Ricky kept his attention on the road, "look, I know you didn't drive eight hours just to take me out for a cup of tea." Sharon ran her finger around the rim of the cup as she continued. "And I don't believe you said a dozen words the entire time we were at the café."

"It's not about me," Rusty blurted.

"Emily. What's happened to Emily?" Sharon didn't try to hide the concern in her voice.

As they pulled into Sharon's parking garage, Ricky noticed Andy Flynn's car parked next to his mother's. He let out a deep sigh. "It's not Emily either."

Sharon noticed his gaze fixed on Andy's car. She remembered their not so pleasant talk regarding Rusty and her ever so lonely heart. She couldn't help but wonder if she was about to get another lecture, only this time about Andy.

"How are things going with Lt Flynn?" Ricky asked. The seriousness in his tone unnerved her, or maybe irritated her.

"Good. Things are good." She smiled warily.

"I'm not sure how to say this, but I'm concerned." He shifted in his seat. "I know you've been out of the dating scene for a long time… and well…

She put a hand up to ward off further comments. "I appreciate your concern, but we are taking this slow. We both have a lot to consider, our careers, our working relationship, the dynamic of the division as well as possible financial entanglements somewhere in the future." Sharon shrugged, "If there is a future to even consider."

"No, mom, that's not exactly what I meant." He bit at his lip, "I hope you're being careful." He tried to avoid her stare by focusing on something, anything outside of the driver's side window.

Sharon patted his hand, "I already explained, we're not rushing into this relationship." Assuming she'd put his concerns to rest, she picked up her purse from the floor of his car and set it beside her. "Are you coming up? I'm sure Andy would like to say hello."

"No, mom, by being careful I mean I hope you realize if something," he made air quotations at the word something, "would happen… well, Em and I could end up sharing responsibility for a new sibling, given Andy's and your ages." Sharon's hand shot up to her mouth. She choked on the last sip of tea. She sat speechless. Ricky felt like time stood still while he waited on her response. "Mom?"

Then she laughed… uncontrollably. "Oh dear son, the likelihood of that is nearly zero." She snort laughed again. "So are you giving me the talk? What, one little brother is enough?"

He shook his head. Seeing his mother laugh should have made him feel foolish. Probably if he had any other mother than her, it would have. At that moment, he realized how lucky he was, blessed really, to have the kind of relationship where he could try to warn his mother, the captain of the Major Crimes Division of the LAPD, the mother of three, the former wife of one, about a responsible adult relationship. "I'm sorry. We just wanted to make sure you were, you know, taking precautions…."

Sharon looked through a mother's eyes at this man-child next to her. If it were anyone else, she might have been angry. What right would anyone have to meddle in her most intimate relationship? Yet, coming from him, in all its awkwardness, a sincere concern was in his heart. He was looking out for her, as she had done for him. They had come full circle. The thought of it saddened her and made her proud. She brushed the hair from her little boy's forehead, and spoke to the man sitting behind the wheel watching her nervously, "Come up for a while?"

"I probably should get back. If I get tired, I can stop at Joe's… he's half way home." He said as he opened her car door.

"Tell Joe I said hello. I rarely see him since you two graduated from college." Sharon gave him a hug, "I love you, Call me when you get home, okay? And be careful."

Ricky gave his mother a long hug in return. "No YOU be careful." He laughed. "Love you too."

She watched his taillights fade rapidly into the distance and he was gone.

Andy was watching the ballgame when she unlocked the door. He looked past her. "Where's Ricky?"

"He had to get back, but he says hello." She took off her shoes at the door and curled up on the sofa next to him.

He rested his arm across her shoulder and pulled her close. "Is everything okay?"

"He warned me to be careful."

"That's understandable. He doesn't want to see you hurt." He gave her a squeeze, "and neither do I."

"He warned me to be careful." She made quotation marks in the air. "In other words, I got the talk." Andy had a blank stare for a moment while what she said took a minute to sink in. "He was concerned, at our advanced ages, about the responsibility of raising a new sibling," she continued.

He laughed, "Worse things could happen."

Sharon turned toward him, "so, if I were to tell you I was pregnant, you would be okay with it?"

"If you told me that right now, hell no, I wouldn't be okay with it…" She felt a twinge of hurt, which flashed obviously across her face. "Since we aren't doing anything to cause it…." He quirked his brows, "I would most definitely have a problem with it." He gave her another squeeze.

Sharon relaxed at his explanation of why he would have a problem if she ended up expecting. It wasn't that Andy wouldn't be happy, it's just that they haven't progressed that far in their old fashioned relationship. Andy went on to explain there would have to be a homerun if she were to score that type of announcement and presently they were somewhere between the dug-out and first base. She started to giggle until he asked about the moment most kids and parents alike dreaded, "So was his version of the talk anything like the version you gave him back in the day?" Sharon tilted her head in a questioning glance. "You didn't give your children the talk?" Andy asked in mock surprise.

Sharon shifted from under his shoulder to look at his face. She needed to see his reaction, "Of course, I gave them the talk, but it probably was not as eloquent as the one I got tonight." A broad smile spread across her lips. "I said, behave yourself, I'm too young to be a grandmother."

"You did not," Andy laughed. "You actually said that and expected them to listen?"

Sharon looked around the room. "You don't see any grandkids running around here, do you?" Then she snort laughed. She stood up saying, "I'm fixing some popcorn, sound good?"

Andy nodded as he turned his attention back to the ballgame. She was putting the finishing touches on the popcorn when Andy said, "I'd feel guilty." He said it more to himself than to her. He repeated it in a softer tone, "I'd feel guilty."

Sharon sat the popcorn on the table in front of them along with his cranberry soda and her iced tea. She took his hand, "Guilty? What are you talking about?"

He shook his head and let out a sigh. "Having another kid… I'd feel guilty for being the dad to this kid that I wasn't to my other two." He shrugged, "Not that I wouldn't like the chance to prove I could be a great dad…"

"You are a great dad, and grandpa… you don't have to prove anything." Sharon curled her legs under her and rested her head on Andy's shoulder. After a moment's thought, she said, "a do over."

"What?" Andy asked, his eyes not leaving the ballgame.

"I wish I could have a do over," she said with a sigh.

Andy focused his attention back on her, "why do you need to do over? Your kids turned out great because of you." He shrugged. "And mine turned out great in spite of me."

"It isn't a do over to change things, but to experience it all again." She studied his expression. "You don't understand, do you?" He shook his head and waited on her to continue. "Emily was a surprise. The first child, things were still hopeful with Jack. When Ricky came along, I knew he would be my last child. Jack wasn't interested in being a husband or a father, so I would be on my own. I was heartbroken knowing I would be experiencing my last firsts with Ricky."

"Last firsts?" Andy questioned.

"You know the last first time I felt a baby move in my belly. The last first time I would have a newborn placed on my chest, only seconds old. The last first time he would smile, or talk, or walk…." her voice drifted off.

She reached into the bowl and scooped up a handful of popcorn. Andy reached for her hand and gave it a kiss, "I wish we could have been back then what we are now."

"What, old?" She said with an arched brow and a small smirk.

"No…together." He raised her hand to his lips again, and with a grin he took a bite of her popcorn.

He settled back and drew her close. She fit perfectly snuggled under his arm, her head resting on his shoulder once again. It was a tie ball game, but they watched it in silence. It was a comfortable silence; one that quietly takes hearts and thoughts by the hand and gently leads them on a journey from what might have been to the hope of what is yet to come…