This is my first fanfiction, so be nice. Rated T for mentions of self-inflicted harm and depression.

I couldn't take it any more. Looking back at the days before her, the way he used to try to make me smile and laugh. The way he tried to make me feel included. I wish he would give attention to me, to make me feel wanted. The way he did all those months ago, before she came. Before she came, I had been happy, content.

Now he has eyes only for her. The way he looks at her, a look filled with such affection, love, and desire. I know he will never look at me that way... who am I kidding right? Who would want to love a monster like me? A demon who can destroy the world with a snap of her fingers. Still I wish, hoping she is just a diversion. A way of release for him, but still it hurt, it hurt so much. I just wanted to crawl into a ball and cry. Cry until I had no tears left, until all the pain was released, until... until what? Until he loved me? Right, like that will ever happen.

I couldn't help the fact I loved him. I had fought it for so long and when I could finally accepted my love for him, it was too late. He had been there so many times for me, trying to cheering me up, and include me. In the end I guess he finally got tired of trying. I wish I had the courage to face him and bare my soul to him, to the things he forced me to feel, the pain he caused me by being with her. I wish I could hate him. It would be so much easier to hate him.

I almost committed suicide yesterday. I was so close, all I had to do was swipe the knife across my wrists. All I had to do to end my existence in this world of heartbreak and agony. I wish I had done it. No one would miss me. Terra made sure of that once she was freed from that stupid rock, she had taken everything from me without even trying. My home, friends, and my one true love.

Without Starfires interruption, I might've died. Now I'm contemplating leaving the Titans. I've been hurt too much. I couldn't bear seeing them each and every day, pretending to be happy for them when I am not. I wished Terra never captured his heart. I wish I could hate her. I wish he would love me... but that's all they are, wishes, and nothing more.

I'm thinking of creating a story out of this little one-shot. What do you think? Leave questions and comments!