Love me right, a haikyu/ハイキュー fanfic

Heyyy ! I've had this written and completed in my computer for a while but I don't know, I probably just wanted to feel the safety of having something to post while I wasn't writing anything so I kept it hidden.
But now I have no such limits and here you go, read my angst !

This is a songfic of Love me right, by EXO. Please go listen to the song and read the lyrics ! The clip is really pretty and the atmosphere it creates is amazing !

Take your time
For some reason, it's a heart pounding night

Koutarou sees him on the dance floor and should probably call it a night. You'll regret it tomorrow morning. One or two more glasses of that cheap alcohol. You'll regret it even more if you don't do anything. Tooru blasting his insecurities in their ears.

Kuroo twirls with the music and Koutarou can feel the rhythm so deep in their bones it's a wonder they're not already up dancing. Or shattered on the floor.

Fuck this, Koutarou's doing it.

He didn't know Koutarou could kiss, but Tetsurou is glad he does, now. How does it feel, having your best friend sucking on your lower lip ? It feels amazing, it tastes like alcohol and toothpaste, and the whooping sounds of Terushima in the background, and golden eyes gleaming at him.

So tonight
Let's run to the end of the moon

"God, Kou, you're gorgeous," Kuroo says, and Koutarou writhes loud enough to make his bones rattle. Your "best friend", uh ? You wanted to give up on the "no homo" thing and boy, you sure did. Tetsurou will think about this, later, when he isn't coming apart to Koutarou grinding their hips up against his, when the night is over and they'll have to look at each other and clean up and decide what to actually do now that they've crossed the line – Koutarou whimpers in his mouth and Tetsurou does, too, because this night he can.

What do they do, now that they both came ? Koutarou shouldn't be caring about this right now, all warm from the afterglow and tingling from where Tetsurou bit them, but they still ask the question aloud and Kuroo laughs, kisses their shoulder, says they clean up and get some sleep, because they're going to be fucking wrecked tomorrow morning. You just know there is enough vodka in your veins right now to make you forget everything that happened and you're scared, you're so scared.

"Kou. I don't. I don't really remember how you ended up here."

Koutarou would gladly remember, mope about it and how they ruined their chances, and then forget everything, but Kuroo is burying his face in their back again and oh, ok, that's how it works.

"Doesn't matter. 'm sleeping with you now."

"Yeah. Ok."

Just right
Ignite your engine, step on the pedal
Everything is special

Kuroo has always been so beautiful under club lights, but this is obscene – Koutarou can't think, can't think past the glow of his skin and the colour of his eyes and the stretch of his smile. You know his smile is for you, because you're looking at him like he means the world to you. Kuroo starts swaying his hips and Koutarou gets up, touching hands and lips and hair and everything, Tetsurou is their everything.

There is a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach, like someone is stirring lead and shaping his thoughts into a whirlwind – Koutarou has their hair down, their shirt open, their legs apart, Tetsurou is shaking from simply looking at them. You're in so deep, you know you shouldn't even be here, look at you, you're begging for something you already have.

You and I look good together
Whatever you want, Imma make it work

Hiccups and whimpers, Koutarou is crying and tearing at their hair and Tetsurou is lying down on his bed pretending to be asleep. You're the worst.

"I'm sorry, Tetsurou, I'm so sorry."

He doesn't sleep, at all, neither does Koutarou, they're both looking at the stars and wishing they don't fall apart.

They shouldn't have said that. Of course you should have, that's what you're here for.

"I love you."

It's more of a moan than it should be for the first time they say it but Tetsurou won't mind, right ?

Kuroo freezes like Koutarou slapped him in the face.

Shawty, Imma party till the sun down
What is this mysterious feeling?
Come to me, hurry, before the sun rise
Wherever I am, me without you is a nobody

Kuroo is still here when they wake up. You thought they'd leave, huh ? Like Tooru did when you started talking about feelings. It's 2pm and they must have slept through the rain because there are no clouds anymore. You have too much feelings. Kuroo is running his hands through their hair and singing a party song and they can't really help it if they start crying again.

You don't do that to your best friend. Tetsurou knows it's too late but he can still try, right ? He can try to fix this.

He can get back to lazy afternoons of video games and jokes at Kenma's and forget everything that happened here and forget that his best friend is currently wetting his sheets with other things than beer or sweat or come.

On this highway, it's a runway
Your eyes that look into mine are the milky way
Just love me right, baby love me right

"I love you"

It's a prayer. A demand.

"I love you."

It's an apology.

"I love you."

It's a collar around Tetsurou's neck.

"I love you."

It's Koutarou's heart in his hands. And you're breaking it.

There's starlight in Tetsurou's hair. You're painting him behind your eyelids. Koutarou is pretty sure Kuroo's never been that high, or he wouldn't have agreed to shotgun. You know he loves it, you set him on fire. They're moving together, at the speed of light, Tetsurou's hands are screaming galaxies in their brain. He's the only thing you see.

Come to me, don't hesitate
You're alluring, you're my universe
Just love me right
My entire universe is you

"Kou… we can't do this anymore…"

He says it like you don't know. Koutarou just nods, because if they try to speak they're going to cry, and they've done that more than enough already. He says it like he hasn't told you a dozen times already.

It's the same, every time. You've never been able to tell them no. Tetsurou sees them, in class, in the bus, at the club, when they play video games together and Akaashi says he wants to go home early – and Tetsurou falls for it, every time.

Shine a light, run into the starlight
Past the milky way – we can't stop

God they missed Tetsurou, the smell of his hair and the touch of his hands and the burn of his moans. Koutarou misses him like they miss the sun. When Kuroo finally sears their lips in a kiss, it feels like they can breathe again. You miss the days when you still talked even more.

It's not that Tetsurou doesn't try. He just can't fight what already is, what feels like it was made to be, even if it burns, even if it burns his heart out of him. They're your other half and you wonder why you're breaking them like this every time your hand touches their face.

The moonlight that shines on us is always the same
I'm still lost in your orbit
I can do this all night long baby
Because wherever I am, me without you is just half

"Tetsurou. Make love to me."

He'd be damned if he didn't say yes. You're already damned.

Why can't you make this work ? What can they say to their best friend when they're desperately in love and deliberately turning this into hell ? Koutarou kisses him like they're letting go.

A bright, moonlit night, the stars give off their fireworks
Shall we fly a little bit higher
Feels like my heart will explode right now, we're the only ones floating up
Leaving the earth behind, below our feet, love me right

He's high, he's so high, that's probably why he has his phone to his ear with Koutarou on speed dial, but Tetsurou doesn't care anymore. Like you ever did. He wants. He doesn't know what, he just wants.

"Kou, tell me you love me."

"You have a very shitty grin when you know you've won. Your hair only stands up right when you're not trying and it makes you crazy. You bump noses with Kenma to make sure they're ok and they love you for that. You smile at me when you know I'm sad."

You could go on forever and ever with this list, and Kuroo crying on the other end of the line.

So come on baby, your dazzling and even more beautiful universe
Just love me right
My entire universe is you

Kuroo crying live is another experience, it suits him, oddly, but they're not happy with the situation.

"Don't cry, please, stop crying."

You're not touching, not touching him, he came to your home in the middle of the night to cry on your shoulder, he's a million miles away.

You're sobbing, you're in love, you don't want this. Bokuto is in front of him and for once Tetsurou is looking – at the bags under their eyes, at the paleness of their skin, at the tears rolling down their cheeks, everything he doesn't want to see.

"Kou. Kou, please – break up with me."

"We never even started dating."

You're the worst.

Can you love me right, just love me right
I just wanna make you love me
My entire universe is you

It's been two days and Tetsurou is already – what, you're relapsing ? Like you haven't been high for most of the past week. Tetsurou is standing in front of the uni gates and waiting for something to happen. Anything.

Koutarou watches him and pales and turns away.

Being high doesn't help you now.

For once it's them doing the talking, and Tooru the listening, but Koutarou misses the afternoons where they'd both mope about their shitty love lives and forget in in favour of moping about their homework and eat too much ice cream for semi-pro volleyball players. Yeah, when you could swallow up your crush on your best friend like it wasn't much. Tooru keeps giving them that look – it's not quite mean. It's pity.

Even when countless nights come
In my sky, only you shine
Whisper only to me

"Fuck, god, this is- you are- amazing-"

Kuroo is far from being coherent but he's never been good at staying quiet, and not talking to each other for more than two days is a first since they met each other. Koutarou always responded well to praise anyway. You're not thinking this through, or you wouldn't be here and you wouldn't feel like this is the end and the world is crashing down and-

What the fuck are you even doing.

"You shouldn't have what, loved me ? I'm too much of a fuck-up for that ?"

Why aren't you saying anything.

"Tetsurou, answer me. Are you even listening ?!"

How are you letting them go ?

"Get out of my house. Tetsurou."

Fuck.

You and I colour in the night sky
Just love me right
My entire universe is you

Tooru is making his phone buzz with angry, drunken texts about Bokuto being heartbroken like Tetsurou doesn't already know.

[From: Tooru~] u kno the worst? theyr telling me ur the niecst thing that happnd to them

[From: Tooru~] theyre not evn jokin, theyr cryin on my shoulder tellin me ur the best frend they ever had

[From: Tooru~] wtf tetsu? wtf

You're scared shitless, aren't you ? Too scared to even try and make it work.

"Akaashi ?!"

You didn't think he'd come just for you, eh ? They're not even this low. Koutarou didn't go to class after Tooru decided they wouldn't try, that Iwaizumi was worth pining after for an indefinite amount of time, but that they could stay friends – and they did, and it's great. But this time they're ok, almost. Koutarou even went to work yesterday.

"Hi, Bokuto. Kenma told me I should visit."

"You really have a first row seat to watch how fucked-up my love life is, uh."

"Don't say this like dating me was a mistake. We really tried."

Kuroo didn't even say he wouldn't try, and you still got your hopes up. Idiot.

Just love me right
An electric cosmic ride, our own night time flight
I just wanna make you love me

"I'm scared, Bo."

It's Kuroo on the phone, again, crying, again, but Koutarou can't answer him. How does he think you feel, how does he think you feel under the weight of being too much but not being enough ? Koutarou wants to cry and shout and hang up and make love to him.

Is Koutarou sure they want to try ? Tetsurou thinks they shouldn't, Tetsurou warns them that he can't- there are so many things he can't do. When did you change so much ? Wasn't he the one telling Kenma that no action lead to no result ? Telling Tsukki to go and confess to the shrimp even if there was every chance he'd fuck this up ? Coward.

You got to love me
My entire universe is you
You love me
My entire universe is you

[From: Oikawa] So you finally told them no.

[From: Oikawa] Good, keep doing that.

You keep going to their coffee shop and you don't even enter. They're talking to a customer, with their smile and their laugh – it looks genuine. You've missed this so much, haven't you. You're too stupid to kiss them and make them laugh.

He doesn't even enter. Kuroo acts like they can't see him, like they're too busy talking to customers to notice him standing in font of the shop every single morning. Koutarou isn't that dumb. Oh yes you are, how do you think you ended up pressed against his lips in the back shop during your break ?

HC time:
- Oikawa never confesses to Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi is upset about this. Kenma finds them snogging in a room and just shouts "GROSS" before walking away
- Kuroo considered dating Tsukishima before he realised Hinata and him were hopelessly in love, then he started coaching Tsukki on "how to confess Like A Pro". It (surprisingly) worked and Kenma had to listen to Kuroo moping about "lost love" for three weeks
- Akaashi and Bokuto dated in high school but with the low key homophobia in Akaashi's family, it wasn't really possible to do anything and they just stopped talking until they met again in a University volleyball match
- The dorm windows are Shit and if you stand in font of them you can feel the wind in your hair. Or, as Bokuto calls it, "the natural hair dryer". He never caught a cold, Oikawa is jealous

So, that's about it ! I hope you enjoyed, don't forget to leave reviews, follows or favourites to let me know you liked it, even though this website doesn't make it really easy... And a big thank you to all the people that already did so !