Disclaimer: Of course I don't own these characters or make any money from this.

Author's Note: This is my first Star Wars story. Please, please be kind. I have edited the holy heck out of this because I am so new to this fandom (and nervous)! I tried very hard not to make any canon mistakes, but please excuse if I did. (Wookiepedia and I have become friends and have been getting closer every day! LOL) This scene is short, but there is more to come if folks are interested. Ok...eeek...I guess this is it-read on. :)

1

He sat on his bunk, in the Ghost, holding the holocron, watching its bloody glow light up the room. Its whisper tried to dig down into his soul. Since the disastrous mission to Malachor, Ezra had moved it to his quarters on the Ghost, but he'd still felt its pull all the way across the camp.

The mood of the Rebel base on Atollon had changed since their mission. Everyone felt the loss of Ahsoka and the worry about Kanan. They were grounded indefinitely for now; Hera thought it was a good idea. After all they had lost. . . she had said it was time to regroup. And they had lost a lot. It hurt Ezra to even think about it, but he was increasingly forcing himself to face the facts. All of this was his fault. His naive desire to trust Maul had ruined everything. It had been the stupidest thing he'd ever done. He hadn't listened to Kanan or Ahsoka and he deserved...he deserved to suffer for that. But so far it was his friends who had done all the suffering.

Hera had known how he was feeling and she had tried to help in her own gentle way. "He doesn't blame you, Ezra. No one does. We can't imagine what you've been through. What we have to do is be strong for Kanan's sake. He needs us right now." He found himself lowering his head again, just as he'd done when she was speaking to him in order to hide his teary eyes. She'd tried to comfort him, but he'd pulled away and taken off, avoiding all of his comrades by hiding in an overhang of the dusty rocks until all the tears were spent.

Later on, that first day back, it had been hard to try and pretend that nothing was wrong. He'd shrugged off everyone's attempt to "talk about it." He knew he had failed as a Jedi and as a member of the rebellion. He knew what they would say and they would say it because they felt pity for him. Zeb would tell him to put it out of mind...Sabine would listen and point out how anyone could have been fooled with a former Sith as evil as Maul lying out of both sides of his mouth. Hera would provide a warm hug to remind him that they loved him, but he deserved none of it. And Kanan…his breath shook as he fought the tears. He just didn't know what to say to his master. It was impossible. What could he say? That he was sorry that his careless actions meant that Kanan was blind, probably forever? He felt today's tears finally tumble down his face and he wiped them away with his free hand. And Ahsoka. He hadn't even begun to touch the depths of that guilt yet.

And all the time, the Sith holocron had been digging into him, trying to get him to open it once again. Promising him that he would find what he was looking for. The stress of trying to ignore the whispering object on top of everything else was beginning to break him. He'd opened it once, but the evil ichor of the dark side had begun to spill from it and he'd used the Force to push it away. In fact, he felt like destroying it, but had no idea how. And even if he did know how to destroy it, would he actually do it? They might lose the only advantage they had right now. Master Yoda had sent them to Malachor to find a way to defeat Vader and his Inquisitors. The holocron had to hold the answer. If it didn't, they had lost all for nothing.

He returned his attention to the glowing pyramid on his palm, staring into its crimson depths with repulsion and dread. This had to be the way, he thought, but then again, he was afraid. If he opened it what would happen? Would the use of it draw the Inquisitors and Vader to their new base? His eyes widened in terror with that thought, and quickly, before he could change his mind, he placed its whispering evil back in his footlocker and left.