A/N and Disclaimer:

Welcome to the Prologue of "From Guilt, Resolve," my own darker take on a Code Geass rewind story. The endnote has a more detailed A/N, but for now, I invite you to read on!

Disclaimer: I own no part of Code Geass or any of the characters appearing in it.

Geass

Thoughts or occasionally for emphasis

"Preludes" followed by -Sources

Prologue: Zero Requiem

Prelude:

"If you are hearing this message, Nunnally, you already know that I'm Zero. I'm sorry. I've failed somehow: either I'm dead or I've fled, too terrified of hurting people close to me. I've tried to distance you from myself when I lose control, but I… there are times when I feel like the only thing that I can feel is rage. Like when I thought you got hurt when… well, I'll explain that later. When that happens, it feels like everything and everyone near me is a target. I am an observer in my own mind, bearing witness to a being of pure, unadulterated hate. And I don't want that for you. You deserve to have a better brother than me, Nunnally, and for that I apologize. I may not be dead when you hear this, but if I'm not I'll be in a place where you cannot—and should not—follow me. Please don't try to find me in that case; I wouldn't do this if I didn't feel I had to, and it hurts me to even say this out loud, but you deserve some sort of explanation for this. For however the public may see me, or my actions. Share it with whomever you wish, but please finish it yourself and think about it before you do so. I'm making the first entry in this Journal just after the Battle of Narita. That was when I realized that foreknowledge couldn't solve everything, and that I could still fail. With that out of the way, let us start at the beginning."

-A recording of Lelouch vi Britannia, to be bequeathed to his sister Nunnally vi Britannia upon his death by the designated executor of his will, his eminence Jeremiah Gottwald, Duke of Virginia.

At last, Lelouch thought with an internal sigh of relief as Suzaku—Zero, he corrected himself—bounded up the ramp towards him. The Emperor had been afraid his friend would lose his nerve. But Suzaku had realized that there were somethings that could only have one solution. In this case, that was Lelouch's death at the hands of his best friend.

It wasn't the best plan ever, nor the most foolproof, but he trusted that Nunnally would make a good empress, in the end, especially with the legitimacy and protection of the new Zero. And Lelouch gave it better than even odds that the inner circle of the Black Knights, like Ohgi and Todoh would figure it out fairly quickly and go along with the plan, even if only because they had no other choice besides another world war. The pieces were all in place, and even if there was some resistance, Kallen would back Nunnally for sure once she figured it out. And with Suzaku's support as well, there wouldn't be a force in the world that could resist the empress when push came to shove.

A sharp, piercing agony brought him back to reality as he heard the wet sound of a sword piercing flesh. I'm sorry, Suzaku. For whatever the thought is worth, I'm sorry it had to be you who survives, and even that is the fault of my Geass, like so much else.

"Lelouch," 'Zero' whispered, his voice breaking with held back tears.

A faint smile crossed the lips of the 99th Emperor of Britannia. His friend regretted it even now, despite all of the logic behind Requiem. As much as it was the antithesis of his own character, it was impossible not to admire it in some ways. Even though Lelouch had killed Euphy and so many others, his Knight still resisted administering the necessary punishment. He raised his bloody fingers to trace the contours of Zero's mask one last time; it was strange, really. He had never believed in the ideals of Zero to begin with. And yet now… now it seems as if it is the true me. Playing the Emperor was as hard as being Zero ever was. To act as if I truly didn't care for others at all, like they were all pawns to be enslaved to my will with Geass… I tore myself apart inside. Without her, I probably would have lost it.

A tear rolled down his cheek as he thought about the person who had sparked it all. I'm sorry, CC. You were my partner, my witch…my friend. Wherever you are right now. I didn't fulfill our contract. I cared for you, maybe even loved you, and yet in the end I have abandoned you like all the others. Except that I discovered your true wish and still broke it. I'm so sorry. The thudding pain in his chest again returned Lelouch to reality, and his purpose for being here, impaled for the world to see. The emperor turned his head toward Suzaku so that the cameras couldn't read his lips. No reason for people to start asking questions now.

"Your punishment shall be this then," he rasped through the pain. "You will live on, defending the weak and always wearing that mask. You will no longer be Suzaku Kururugi, but sacrifice your happiness for the world, forever."

Suzaku said something in reply, but his senses were already beginning to fade and Lelouch couldn't make it out. Tumbling down the ramp, his body came to a rest next to his sister.

"Yes," he whispered finally, at last at the end, able to rest. "I have destroyed the world, and created it anew." Again he thought he heard a response, but he could barely even notice it existed.

He felt his last breath leave his body as he closed his eyes. Darkness consumed him, a pinpoint of light the only guide as he felt himself drawn forward. I guess this is what it feels like to be dead. It's not that bad, really. The light grew in his vision until it dominated his 'sight', though it remained pure white. I'm comig, Euphy. I'll join you soon in the World of C. Finally reaching the glow, he stepped through it. It felt like he was resurfacing after a long dive, resistance to physical movement suddenly lifted, feeling air against his skin, smelling the dust in the air. That was… interesting. Lelouch breathed in deeply. I hope that— he felt his heartbeat flutter as the pure terror of realization cut off his thoughts. Why am I breathing when there is no air in the World of C? Realizing that his eyes were actually closed, the white glow around him fading into familiar patterns of light and dark, he steeled himself against his fear. Only one way to figure out what's going on, I guess.

A/N:

Hello to everyone, and thank you for reading the prologue of my first official fanfiction. I have been a big fan of CG ever since I watched it, and I've read many, many of the stories on this site, so I'm not going to list all of them that influenced me. Let it suffice to say that many did have some influence, but that I wanted to write a Rewind story specifically because I feel like my tone would be different than those before; certainly not better, necessarily, but at least different. Also, I just wanted to do it because I enjoyed writing it.

That said, to those expecting yet another teasing Lelouch, overtly flirtatious and sexualized CC, and a generally humor-focused story, this will not be that story. It would take too long to explain my interpretations of characters, but in short there will be differences in their portrayal in this story as compared to other similar stories. Also, although there will be humor, this will not be a humor-centric story, and even though it is to some extent a romance-driven story (between LL and CC for the main pairing, if you were wondering, and it will be only them, not Kallen or Milly or anyone else), there will probably be no lemons because I have no experience writing them and I am not comfortable trying to do so; if there are a lot of requests for one, I might do it, but don't expect it. For now, this fic is rated M for exactly what it says it is rated M for: Language, possible graphic violence, and protecting my account from the mighty ban-hammer of the God-Administrators of Mankind.

Wait. Wrong universe. sorry. But anyway, that's about all I have to say. If you are curious about choices I made and want to ask me about them, feel free to PM me, and as always reviews, follows, and favorites are much appreciated. I hope you enjoy reading this story as much as I did writing it!