I'm so, so, SO sorry! This took almost a year and I really won't even try to defend myself.
I don't know what happened, but somehow this chapter's outlines just hadn't felt right to me, so I rewrote it in my head again and again, lost the motivation, only to finally, FINALLY, come back to this!
And here we go!
I hope you like the conclusion.
I wanna thank all of you so, so much for clicking the story, for giving kudos to it and for all the sweet, sweet comments! I will work on answering them over the next few days 3
I love all of you, this if for you, and again, I'm so sorry this took so long!

Also I'm sorry if the whole format/spaces look(s) weird, I'm trying to make it look a little better!

V. Trusting

His gaze rested on the ceiling.

He felt unable to move, his mind reeling with the images he had seen what felt like seconds ago, but which seemed impossible to grasp now.

Nothing of that could really have happened, right?

Alec sat up, looking around the room. It was in the exact same state it had been in when he had left, so the thought of this possibly being just another dimension that simply looked like his shrank, the panic that had accompanied it slowly subsiding.

Closing his eyes, Alec took a few breaths to calm down, forcing himself to simply forget about what he had seen.

All of that were probably just his nerves reacting to the stress he had been through these days, along with the fights and endless discussions he seemed to have had with almost everyone.

Because he was going to marry soon.

He was going to marry Lydia.

He felt the panic creeping back into his bones at lightning speed, his mind going back to the rune on the other Alec's skin, the wedding rune, that had been clearly visible on his hand and still… Still he had kissed Magnus, had grasped his clothes as if his life depended on it.

Everything about it had been so hurt and so desperate that it made his guts twist even now, even after having seen the happy dimension afterwards.

He felt a pounding starting in his head, along with the realisation that whatever all of that had been – there was no way any of that could simply have been a dream.

"I need to talk to you."

Jace looked up from where he had been scribbling down notes for his report about their last mission – Alec knew how much he hated it and it was written all over his Parabatai's face. He seemed to be rather happy about the distraction, shoving the notes away from him more than was necessary, before he nodded to signal Alec that he was listening.

"It's just-. Listen, it's about Magnus."

He knew that he was rushing his words, his usual drawl getting worse with every word he said, but judging by Jace expression suddenly turning serious, he simply assumed that he had understood.

"Did something happen to him?"

Alec finally sat down on the bed and started lightly picking at his fingers, as if that would help him explaining the situation in any way.

He felt like a stupid little kid that had to admit to his mother that he had really, really screwed something up.

"I went to sleep and-", he interrupted himself, his gaze turning towards the windows.

It was pitch-dark outside.

He looked at Jace.

"Why are you even still awake?"

His parabatai rolled his eyes, nodding towards the papers on his desk.

"I procrastinated writing the stupid report. I asked Izzy to do it, but she refused."

He sounded incredibly annoyed, as though the simple thought of him having to do such low duties as writing a report were beyond his imagination.

"Anyway, you woke up, and? I mean, is that it? I would be more concerned if you hadn't."

Alec rolled his eyes at him, before looking back onto his hands. He was wringing them nervously, gulping down a breath, before he looked up again.

"It's just that I had those really strange dreams about Magnus and-", he stopped again, licking his lips and trying to find the right words.

He raised his gaze, almost hoping that Jace had already understood, somehow, what kind of mess he was in and that he was unable to explain.

What he got instead was a mildly awkward expression and Jace opening his mouth in an obvious attempt to say something.

Before he could, Alec realised how terribly wrong his explanation must have sounded and he felt his cheeks heating up, raising his hands before saying "No, no, no, that's not what I meant!"

Jace chuckled, obvious relief in his tone, before he crossed his arms in front of his broad chest.

"Then what was it? Was it bad?"

Alec sighed, trying to finally find the right words to explain the whole twisted situation.

"I saw us, him and me, in different dimensions. It was like some kind of weird dream world where I kept falling into different situations, but...", he ran a hand through his hair, and couldn't stand to look anywhere near where Jace sat.

He knew that Jace knew, since there was no way his parabatai had never noticed Alec's pining, which had included way too many longing stares and lingering hugs.

He also knew that Jace didn't mind, that he would probably be happy when Alec finally told him that he wasn't into girls.

But doing it was a whole different thing than thinking about it, even with the calming thought of Jace not judging him.

He tried to swallow the lump in his throat and finally managed to croak the words out.

"We were together. Like, together together", he managed to look Jace in the eye, his gaze hard, so he would understand.

Jace just nodded at him, his expression not having changed on bit.

It hadn't even wavered.

All of a sudden, Alec had the unbearable urge to simply cry. Of frustration, of happiness – he couldn't say.

"And I feel like that wasn't just a dream. It couldn't have been. All these different dimensions showed me that... That marrying Lydia is-", he swallowed.

The word "wrong" burned at the tip of his tongue, but he didn't feel like that could describe it.

Lydia was incredible. She was beautiful and smart and she had suffered so much already, having lost the love of her life.

The thought in mind, Alec realised what he had tried to say the whole time, but what had just felt selfish and stupid to say.

"I don't think it would be fair to either of us, you know? She deserves to be happy."

Jace's expression had changed into something that Alec couldn't read and it terrified him.

Then, suddenly, he stood up from his chair and put his arms around him.

"That might have been the most sentences I've heard you say in a long time", he chuckled, the sound close to Alec's ear.

"I'm really happy that you finally got that into that big head of yours. You might be able to make Lydia happy on your wedding day and you two might even be good at the whole play-pretending, but... Neither of you would enjoy that for long. And I would hate to see that", he put Alec on arm's length, looking him in the eyes.

"I mean it. I think you should talk to Magnus. I can see that he makes you happy and he is really trying, okay? I know I couldn't really stand him at first but he got you to freaking smile again, and-", he sighed and turned his head away, a small smile playing on his lips.

"I really wanna see that more often again."

The apartment-complex was as brightly lit as ever.

Alec stood on the empty street, a tension in his chest that he didn't even feel when they went out into a night just as black as this one to hunt a demon.

He hoped Magnus was still awake – or eve here.

If he was judging by the look of hurt in his eyes when Alec had told him about the wedding, he might have vanished off the radar as quickly as he had when they had first met him and Magnus had escaped them through a portal.

The thought made the nerves in his body flare up and his stomach tighten uncomfortably.

A few moments later and Alec found himself standing in front of the apartment door.

Th only source of light came from a bulb that was hanging from a thin wire, swinging ominously on the ceiling, as if some invisible force was playing with it.

He rang the doorbell.

Seconds ticked by.

Seconds in which Alec considered simply turning around and running down the stairs like a mad-man, hoping that Magnus wouldn't see him and probably never see him again afterwards either.

Just as he considered actually following his plan, the door opened and revealed a fully-dressed and perfectly styled Warlock.

Magnus looked at him as if he were a kid that had rung his bell for fun and had forgotten to run for the prank to actually work.

Instead of saying anything, Alec simply walked into the flat, suddenly scared that Magnus might kick him out before he had the chance to say anything.

He opened his mouth to explain himself, just in the moment that his gaze fell on the countless supplies that Magnus kept storage - for potions, spells and other things only Warlocks could do.

Suddenly, a cold and ugly sensation filled his guts and a thought infiltrated his brain; one that grew and took over his mind way too quickly.

He turned around, faced the completely bewildered Magnus, and asked in a tone that sounded way too sure and way too accusing:

"You did this."

Everything seemed very clear to him now.

Why would he sudden dream of Magnus sobbing his eyes out without him?

Why would he see Magnus and him – and only Magnus and him – happy together.

Why him, of all people?

"You initiated that, didn't you?", his voice was loud now, all his insecurities and fears washing over hi, taking control of his brain.

"You made me see those things so I wouldn't go and marry Lydia."

Magnus still looked at him, his jaw suddenly set and tight.

"I'm sorry to disappoint my dear Alexander, but I'm afraid I have to tell you that I do not have the slightest idea of what you are talking about."

His tone was so sickly sweet that it made Alec even angrier, his hurt expression only fuelling the fire in his gut further and making the whole situation so, so much worse.

"You made me see those things, with, with us both! You showed them to me so I would see that you're the one I should go to and not Lydia!", he was outright yelling now, even when he saw Magnus expression crumble over his words, one the Warlock tried very hard to look cool and collected.

With all the calmness he was apparently able to muster, he asked:
"Could you explain to me what you saw exactly?"

Alec turned away from him, huffing indignantly, before pointing an accusing finger at him.

"You! I saw you the whole time! You were crying over me, and, and you introduced yourself to my parents and we were happy, and then we had this... Thing, but I was married to Lydia. But then I wasn't, but I had this ring from you and we had a house and mom and Izzy... They-", he was rambling, words blurring together.

His heart was beating two hundred miles per hour and he buried a hand in his hair, tugging a strand as if that could possible wake him from this disaster.

"I can't do that."

The statement was simple. There were no emotions in it.

Magnus had his arms crossed in front of the silky, purple shirt he was wearing. His expression was serious.

"What do you mean?"

The warlock shook his head, as though he were disappointed in Alec. And maybe he was.

"We can not create feelings. The only thing we can do is enhancing them, meaning we can take feelings, thoughts, insecurities or fear that were there before and enlarge them."

Alec stared at him. He felt his pulse quickening at the same time that his mind seemed to go completely blank.

"What you saw has not been created by any Warlock. The only thing that is capable of making you see those things is your own brain, Alec. I had nothing to do with that. And neither did anyone else. I would suggest you looking at yourself first instead of lashing out at others", Magnus voice was still calm, but he wasn't trying to hide the pain in his voice anymore.

Alec looked back at him, a bottomless shame spreading in his gut.

He was so stupid.

He had talked to Jace for that not to happen, didn't he?

He knew that what he had seen, that none of that had been made up.

Of course the situations had never played out like that, but his feelings...

All of the feelings those Alecs had displayed were real.

"Magnus, I'm sorry."

The words tumbled out of his mouth without Alec really thinking about them.

He saw Magnus stopping in his tracks to the door – he had probably been about to kindly ask Alec to leave his apartment, so he weren't able to throw any more hurtful things into his face.

Alec's stomach twisted at the thought of how often he had done that in the past few days.

But Magnus?

Magnus had only ever been kind to him.

He had given him space, had talked to him for hours about mindless things to keep his nerves from betraying him.

He had told him that he wanted him to be happy, that he knew he would do anything for his family but that Alec needed to do something for himself every once in a while too.

All this man had done for him had been selfless and all Alec had ever been was terribly selfish and hurtful.

The words he had meant to say, the confession that was long overdue, died in his throat.

In this moment he realised that whatever he did, he wasn't able to right the wrongs he had done to Magnus and that the Warlock deserved so much better than a self-pitying, closeted and fearful Shadowhunter that only hurt him and even accused him of playing mind-tricks on him.

How much more could one single person fuck up?

Magnus still looked at him, his gaze questioning and – hopeful?

Alec just shook his head, walking the steps that took him to the front door.

He had the words to say goodbye to the Warlock already at the tip of his tongue, when all of a sudden, Magnus grabbed his arm and stopped him in his tracks.

"Tell me what you wanted to say. You owe me at least that, Alexander."

Hearing this name again - the name only Magnus had been able to say with so much kindness – without any venom to it made Alec want to give up and simply cry until there was nothing left of him.

And then, pushed on by these emotions, Alec finally found the words he had originally wanted to tell Magnus.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I dragged you into this mess. I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to get you involved into this whole Shadowhunter-Business. I seriously never wanted to make you feel like I was just calling you whenever you felt useful to us and I, I stopped Jace from calling you all the time and, I... I mean it, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have accused you of these things, but I was so scared and honestly, I'm still terrified, because everything that I saw only proved what I've been hiding from, from me, and everyone else and..."

He stopped his rambling, looking at Magnus with pleading eyes, begging him to forgive him and to understand, even though he deserved none of it.

But Magnus simply looked at him, the hand still on his arm, and Alec only now noticed how close they were standing.

"And what was that?"

He could just leave now.

He could leave and not look back and marry Lydia and make his family proud.

He could do all of that and be unhappy for the rest of his life.

What he did instead was none of that.

Alec leaned forward and pressed his lips to Magnus.

He could feel the hitch of Magnus' breath, could feel the way the Warlock immediately melted into his touch, which filled him with a happiness so bright and honest that it made him feel light headed.

He buried his fingers into the soft fabric of Magnus's shirt and pulled him impossibly closer, the tiny scratches of stubble against his cheeks and jaw adding to the sensation of almost-dizziness he was experiencing.

When they parted after what felt like minutes or hours or days, Alec leaned his forehead against Magnus', catching his breath.

What followed were five words that he had never thought he would ever hear himself say.

"I'm in love with you."

And Magnus looked at him, happiness so evident in his eyes that Alec felt the shame from before, shame over all the bad things he had said, overtaking him again.

"I'm in love with you, too, Alexander."

It was everything he had hoped for and so much more – and so much more than he deserved.

But, just as he had realised before, Magnus had always been too good to him.