Chapter 12: A Clarification

Chapter Summary: Where Jim demonstrates much insight into human nature, so that if this gig with the Inquisition doesn't pan out, he can put on a jeweled turban and predict futures for fancy ladies in Orlais' salons. It really doesn't take much, according to Morrigan, who says tonight's lucky numbers are 5, 11, and 69.

Jim handed the cup of water to Leliana, lying beside him on the narrow bed.

"Ah," she sighed contentedly. "You were just what I needed!"

Jim smiled, gazing over her lovely figure clad only in a sheet.

"Were you having a rough day?" he wondered, settling back beside her. He turning to face her as he settled his head on the pillow they were sharing.

"Try a rough decade," she snorted lightly. "I am glad you can meet with me as often as you do…I am fully aware that I am keeping you all to myself and probably causing most of the female population in Skyhold to become quite…frustrated." She winked. "I know I was, when we couldn't rendezvous yesterday…"

Normally he'd laugh, even if such comments struck him right in his heart. He adored the spymaster and felt lucky that she had reciprocated the flirtation that had led to their delightful, furtive times in the rookery. When they had begun, he'd thought just meeting with her occasionally would suffice; but more and more, he found himself pining for her: for her smiles, her charming accented voice, how she told him things about the world. As of late, those lighthearted moments had become as significant as their passionate romps. For some reason, her glib comment upset him and he realized it was not going to sit well with him if he said nothing this time.

"Leliana," he began decisively, swinging his legs over the bed, "if you need some stress relief, I suggest you seek a healer who can work your tired muscles…or perhaps consider joining a prayer group at the Chantry. I don't like how you refer to me as just a diversion."

Leliana balked.

"I didn't mean to insinuate that—"

"Did it ever occur to you that there might be more to me than just being a toy for your pleasure? And that I might think of our rapport differently?"

Leliana sat up on her knees on the bed, contemplating a very distraught Jim reaching for his trousers on the ground.

"Jim, why are you getting so upset?" she asked, as he began to pull on his trousers. "I thought we were having fun!" she protested.

"I was having fun! But I am wondering if there could be more between us. I think we could still have fun, and not just between the sheets," he complained. "I would like to spend more time with you…outside the rookery. Maybe take you out to…dinner!"

There. He'd done it. Said what was in his heart. Well, kinda, he surmised.

Leliana squinted.

"A date?" she repeated. "Don't people go on dates precisely to get to the point we are at?" she joked.

"You know, I can't deny that when we first started this," he contemplated the small, cozy room, "it was out of pure attraction," he explained. "But soon after, I realized you intrigued me."

"Intrigued you," she stated, still surprised at his reaction.

"I see how hard you work, how much of yourself you give to the Inquisition, practically living up here, forgoing the comforts of your position. I know you shoulder so much responsibility and have to make peace with so many difficult decisions." He raised his hand at her as she began to interrupt. "I know you are a strong, brave, and intelligent woman."

Someone's inspired! He thought, marveling at the ease with which he was articulating his thoughts and feelings. It's just flowing like something...flowing... today!

"But I also see a more fragile, vulnerable part of you no one else gets to witness," he declared. "I want to be there for you. I want to shelter you when your burdens become too great. I may just be a lowly private, but I don't think you need to have rank to offer someone affection and…" he hesitated, trying to summon the courage. "Love."

Her expression softened.

"That's very…I…" She took a deep breath. "I don't know what to say."

Jim smiled and clasped her hands in his.

"Just say you will let me take you to dinner tomorrow at the Herald's Rest," he asked. "Just say you will give me a chance…That you will try to get to know me and see me as more than an afternoon tryst."

Leliana was deeply touched. Her eyes glistened as she contemplated him, smiling at her so tenderly.

"I don't know, Jim…I am not someone easy to be involved with. As long as we keep things physical, that makes things simpler…but you are asking for an intimacy that is far more complex," she told him. "You know that I am devoted to a cause: that my life has been dedicated to the Chantry's mission, to the Divine…and now, to the Inquisition."

He nodded solemnly.

"You know…there is a high probability I will become the next Divine," she confided. "Perhaps you should offer such a heartfelt proposal to someone who'd be able to be by your side: a companion who'd be able to make a home with you, perhaps raise a family with you someday…"

Jim remained steady.

"Those are excuses. How do you know those are all things I want? Besides, I, too, have dedicated myself to the Inquisition. I think you are afraid," he told her. "I think you hide behind all these excuses and remain distant so you won't get hurt."

Leliana eyes widened with complete wonder.

She had enjoyed her time with him, of course, but had never realized how perceptive he was.

"All I am asking for is a chance, an opportunity for us to get to know each other better, for us to enjoy each other's company," he insisted. "And then we'll see where this goes. What do you say?"

Where was that eloquence coming from? He was being so…eloquent? Was that it? And…Romantic? Who managed to talk about affection and feelings in such a passionate way?

It was as if a little bit of Commander Cullen had rubbed off on him.

She still hesitated.

"How can you give up all the sex you've enjoyed having here? How do you know I'll be enough to satisfy you?" she pointed out.

"Done—and done." He nodded.

"What do you mean?" she tilted her head.

"I haven't been with anyone else since we've begun seeing each other. All I want is to be with you. Give me a chance to prove my feelings," he reiterated, squeezing her hands tighter. "Please," he begged.

Looking at him sitting beside her, so earnest, expressing himself so sincerely…She felt a little flutter in her heart.

"Your name is etched into my every step. I will not forsake You, even if I forget myself," he recited. "You composed the cadence of my heart."

Leliana threw her head back and laughed heartily. He'd mixed the verses up, but they were straight from the Canticle of Trials. Very clever of him, she had to concede. And very sweet.

"All right," she decided. "I will go with you to the Herald's Rest tomorrow. On a date," she confirmed, coquettishly. "I just know I am about to become the most hated woman in Skyhold," she sighed.

He reached for her and hugged her joyfully.

"But you need to clarify something for me…If we are dating…Does it mean we won't be doing this anymore?" she wondered.

He snorted.

"That's just crazy talk!"

He grasped her around the waist, pulling her over him. He kissed her fervently. He could sense she was getting aroused from the way she began to lightly grind her hips into his groin.

"So…what does that make us now?" he asked her between kisses.

"I suppose we are lovers?"

"Hm…I think it's something else," he whispered, cupping her delicious bottom.

"What?" she asked in a faint voice.

"Technically I am your boyfriend now."

She let out an amused cry.

"No, no…Listen: it's true. I think you need me, because, look," he explained, "you get so hot when I recite a few lines from the Chant. Can you imagine if you're Divine and you're reciting the Chant all day? You're going to need me to take care of your…needs. I just know it," he teased.

She slipped her hand down and stroked the large erection beneath his trousers, making him shudder with pleasure.

"Now who is hot after reciting the Chant?" she provoked, licking her lips as she began to undo the buttons. "You really are incorrigible…That is just so wrong," she scolded him affectionately.

"I know, huh? You should punish me," he grinned. "Oh, do punish me!"

A/N: Next chapter is the last one. Stay tuned for the epilogue...and thank you for coming along and being such good sports!