This isn't my life

Neko-chan: Hey guys I am back at it again with a new story, sorry if you don't think I am making you guys waiting but there has been several self-insert stories I been reading that has gotten me wanting to write something like that, not like my One Piece story if you read that but different.

Chapter 1: Infant years

You know that tight feeling you get in your chest when you get out of breath? It makes you want to throw up and take deep breaths, that's how I was feeling right now. When that feeling was finally gone I could only cry out in relief. As I cried I was coated in warmth and placed into someone arms as they shushed me to sleep.

It took me a couple of days to keep focus or in other words awake to know what was going on... I was a baby, a crying drooling baby ok maybe take away the crying part but I did drool a lot. If I wasn't drooling on myself I was drooling on the cot that I was placed in, the feeling was mutual to say the least. I formerly Silvia age 21 has somehow been turned into a baby, either I died and got reborn or technology has really come far the past month.

Its most likely the former one, as I let my mind wonder I heard the door open I turned toward the noise and spotted a young woman she looked about in her late 20's she had long ebony hair, I couldn't tell the colour of her eyes as the room was dark, she wore what looked like a kimono, but again it was too dark to see what colour it was. She walked in the room and glanced over me smiling picking me up as she held me before pulling her... Dear god please don't tell me this woman is going to.

After what felt like a lifetime which in this life wasn't that long, but either way now after a face full of breast I was able to see the woman's face, she had black eyes she had a kind smile on her face as she bounced me in her arms it was different from what I was use to back when I was a child. Mother was there for me and my siblings but distant, she and father was a worker their feelings were mainly anger, not abuse anger but the yelling scolding type. It felt foreign to see someone smile at me like this... It was unsettling to me.

The rotation of sleep, cry, sleep, stare at dust and... Eat for the next few months nothing happened I didn't know if I was a female or male, what I looked like ,who was my father, was there any other people in this house? And most important what did the outside look like. Right now I am just sat there staying silent the woman which I guess was my mother came in a kept checking on me wondering if I moved, cried out or really anything. Every time she looked in on me I looked back at her, only for a moment before turning back to the wall, she seemed to have made a huffing sound and she picked me up and did something surprising she took me out of the room.

I blinked it was strange she was taking me out from my room she babbled on as she smiled at me, she seem excited about something, maybe she was taking me to the park. I glanced about my surroundings and found that the house we were in was an old fashion wooden house, it had sliding paper doors as the woman entered a room my eyes settled on a man, he looked rough scruffy beard sharp blue eyes with black hair in his mouth he had a pipe it wasn't lit but he held it there. My eyes drifted down as I spotted a katana on his hip, who carries a weapon in this day and age more less then a sword.

He stood up smiling as he came in with open arms hugging the woman tightly, though this also meant partly squashing me making me protest against this and squirmed. As he backed away looking sheepishly I gave him a huff and a glare causing him to laugh rubbing my head making the woman slap his hand back yelling at him. Serves him right, I clutched on to her tighter I could easily guess who this man was but I won't really say it, both of these people are my 'parents' I just that term loosely as I knew who was my parents were and it wasn't these people, maybe sometime in the future but for now they were nothing but strangers to me.

My routine was changed up I was allowed out of my room, the lady who I found out was called Honami and the man called Kirihata both Japanese names, while they kept calling me 'Fuyki-chan' unknown what to make of the name I just gone on my way with crawling and exploring the place testing the limits I could crawl away from I guess you can call her mother. She seemed to have a simple life of sitting in the house cleaning, writing, taking care of me and basic house wife stuff. While father... Well I don't get to see him often, he seems to come and go as he pleases, mother wears a frown on her face when he leaves and become very attached to me for the next couple of days, I curse the man as the woman didn't let me out of her sight.

One day she sat me in front of mirror, so now I could finally see this Fuyuki person was, I was chubby but I was a toddler tuff of dark hair that actually looked like it was a very dark shade of red, large blue eyes stared back at me. I was looking at a stranger, who was this? Was this me, I gave a small frown and crawled away clutching onto mother's sleeve she was surprised as I was a quiet child she picked me up trying to comfort me but it didn't work. As I looked back into the mirror reality came crashing down on me, that wasn't me they were too pale, they had dark blue eyes, I did the only thing I could think of and that was scream.

I screamed out in pain

In agony

In despair

In anger

I screamed till I choked and felt the bouncing and soothing coos the gentle rubbing of my back, putting me to sleep. I was too tried to protest as tears leaked from my eyes, tears for the memories of the people I left behind, darkness engulfed my vision the last thing I heard was mother's voice she sounded worried.

It had been a couple of months since of that moment, I had not made a sound since then which caused my mother to be very concerned about me she tried to get me to notice her, interact with her. Though I just sat there where ever she placed me staring and just be had a glazed look over me. Mother always looked at me with concern eyes wet as she picked me up muttering something into my ear as she weeped, she sounded so sad and surrowful... It was something I didn't want to hear again so I reached up and wiped her tears and gave her a small smile.

She jerked back in shock or surprise I couldn't tell which one it was but she gave out a chocked sob and hugged me tighter as I gently cooed in her arms. Mourning about the past didn't bring it back nor will I go back in it, I guess looking to the future and staying with this new family will be the best for me.