Don't Cha Wish Your Doctor Was Hot Like Me? Chapter 2: You Can Leave Your Hat On, an one piece fanfic

Disclaimer: The lyrics used are based on "You Can Leave Your Hat On," written by Randy Newman, owned and copyrighted by Reprise records.

I claim no ownership, have credited the original artists, have made the copyright owners of the song clear, make no profit from this, write only for entertainment purposes and have made use of the song's lyrics in a parody manner (i.e.: the lyrics were altered for comedic use and this is protected by 'Fair Use' policy).

It was eerily quiet on the upper levels of the sub that day. Too quiet. No crewmembers traversing the top staircases, enjoying the fresh air on deck as they sailed the surface. No one on duty keeping the upper levels clean. No one performing their ritualistic daily maintenance check of the equipment up here. Certainly no Law lurking up here within his usual domains.

Reaching the first floor landing with a quiet, tentative step, Nayla had a bad feeling about this. A really bad feeling about this. It felt like there was something sour in her stomach. Butterflies fluttered frantically in it, something twisted her gut uncomfortably. She had an unshakeable sense of foreboding, dread, intuition…Something was very, very off and even more alarmingly, very, very familiar about this scenario. This had happened before.

Practically yelping in her shock as she felt a heavy hand fall onto her shoulder, she jumped out of her skin, whirring around to face her would-be attacker only to immediately yell at him for startling her. "Shachi! You scared the hell out of me!"

Brows rising as she slapped a hand over her rapidly beating heart, Shachi lifted his from her. "Wow, sorry. You're so jumpy, are you ok?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine, just a little…Yeah." She managed out, looking up and down the vacant hallway.

Humming unsurely, he looked her over with concern. "You look a little pale, Nayla-chan. You should let Captain check you out. Actually, as a matter of fact, he's over there at the moment."

Following his gesture to the door across the hall, she felt herself pale another shade as she glimpsed the sign that hung above it that read "Theatre 1."

"No, no, no. That's ok, I just need a little fresh air and maybe a glass of wat-"

"Oh, I insist!" Shachi grinned knowingly, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and turning her towards the door before she could get much further in her retreat.

"Really, I'm f-Penguin! Penguin, please help me!" She called out to the man as she saw him stride down the hall towards them. Though he ignored her plea and simply smiled at her as he reached the door and opened it for them.

"Trust me, you'll feel muuuch better after this." Shachi assured.

"Shachi, please don't do this." She pleaded, starting to backpedal against his marching them forward towards the door.

"Come on, Nayla-chan. You'll love it, I promise."

"No. No, no, no, no, no." She shook her head, digging her heels into the floorboards as they got too close for comfort.

"In ya go!" He pushed her into the open doorway of the unlit room.

Whirring around, she immediately tried to leave, his and Penguin's wide, toothy grins the last thing she saw as they immediately closed the door behind her.

"Pen! Shach!" She slammed her hands to its surface, trying to push it open only to find they held it shut on her. "If you love me you'll let me out!"

Hearing nothing but the metallic sound of a lock sliding into place as her reply, she growled in frustration. "You fuckers are dead to me." She hissed vehemently under her breath, taking serious contemplation of breaking the door down, beating them to death with its shattered remains and fleeing the scene befo-

Her thoughts of swift and painful vengeance were stopped in their tracks as lighting was turned on. The centre of the room suddenly flooded with brightness, the same circular, adjustable, overhead lights that hovered above the operation tables within this theatre were all focused on the same bed lying vacant in the middle of the room like a spotlight, the edges remaining shrouded in darkness.

A click of a button and the silence was soon broken by the instantly recognisable, slow, extravagantly jazzy intro of brass instruments to a song she wished she didn't know all too well.

"...Oh god, no."

A flush of heat hit her cheeks as she saw Law stride from the shadows at the back, a confident smirk in place and a playful glint to his eyes as he came to a stop in the centre of the room and stood beneath the bright beam.

His casual attire once again replaced by his smart slacks, his long, white doctor's coat which he wore buttoned up and his stethoscope hung around his neck. The only thing seemingly mismatched to his outfit was his usual furry, spotted hat sitting atop his head.

Deciding she'd rather put an end to this before it started, she licked her dry lips and tried to speak up over the volume of the music, nearing him cautiously so that he could hear her. "Law, if this is some kind of romantic gesture, I appreciate it, but no thanks. If this is some kind of-"

"Baby take off your coat."

The song began, his fingers reaching up to his top button and his smirk growing as her eyes fell to them.

"Real slow."

Blinking away from watching him begin to slowly unbutton his white coat she continued, yelling a little louder over the music. "-Some kind of prank to make me feel awkward, then don't think I'm above trying to make-"

"And take off your shoes."

"-TRYING TO MAKE YOU PAY FOR IT." She yelled louder, getting nearer in her annoyance as he ignored her and continued to undo the buttons of his top, revealing bare, tattooed abs as he began slipping his shoes off.

"I'll take off your shoes."

She looked down as he kicked them off to the side, looking back up in time to watch him allow the long, white sleeves of his coat slide over his muscled arms to fall to the floor. His defined flesh gleaming under the spotlight as his hips moved in time to the music.

"Baby take off your dress."

He curled an index finger at her, ushering her closer, his sly expression telling her what he wanted her to do.

"No." She refused, beginning to back away to a safer distance.

"Yes, yes, yes."

The song seemed to answer her for him as he pushed a thumb beneath either side of his waistband, her gaze following against her will as he began tugging his pants down, revealing a tantalising amount of forbidden flesh as his body undulated in time to the music.