My mom is yelling at me right now as I publish this RIP. I am so done. Thanks for sticking in there, though, guys. Sorry I haven't updated in forever. I was at the Big Sur International Marathon this weekend. If you haven't done so already, make sure you put it on your bucket list. It's 100% the most beautiful thing you'll ever see.

I was sitting on the bed in my room when I heard a knock at the door. It was hard to believe it was my room. It was huge. There was a King sized bed, something I didn't even know had existed. I had a bathroom of my own, with a bathtub, not a tiny, cramped shower. It was incredible.

I got up off of my bed (it was still hard to believe), and opened the door. Steve was standing there.

"Hey," he said.

"Hey," I replied, leaning against the doorframe.

He looked past me into my room, which was half unpacked. I had put all of my clean clothes into my dresser, and set aside my dirty clothes to wash later. "I'm not interrupting, am I?" he asked.

I shook my head. "No, I was just finishing unpacking. What's up?"

"I got a message from Director Fury," he said, "He asked Sam, Natasha, and I to help train you for the Hydra missions you agreed to. You didn't tell me you agreed to do Hydra missions. I thought you were just a consultant."

"Oh, I thought I did," I said, nervous for his reaction. I remembered how Hawkeye had reacted when I told him that I was considering joining Hydra. For some reason, it would feel so much worse if Steve disapproved. "I'm only there for Hydra, though. I'm not going on any other missions."

He raised an eyebrow, leaning against the door frame. "So, you're only there for the most dangerous missions?"

"Steve, I know what I'm doing," I insisted, the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. "You don't have to tell me that it's dangerous. I know it's dangerous. It's not going to change my mind."

"Nefta, I'm just trying to look out for you," he said seriously.

"You don't have to look after me. I've looked after myself for 22 years." I snapped, and slammed the door in his face.

I instantly regretted it.

I could almost see the look on his face.

We'd barely known each other a day, and I could still imagine the way his brows would furrow, the hurt look in his bright eyes, way his nose would crinkle in confusion. I already felt like I'd known him forever.

Maybe this was what it was like to be friends with someone.

And maybe I had just blown it.

"I'm still going to listen to Director Fury," he said through the door, his voice slightly muffled. "I'll meet you in the gym at eight, okay? Eat something small beforehand."

I didn't respond. The words were caught in my throat. I wanted to apologize, but some part of me was still extraordinarily mad. I wasn't some baby that needed to be cared for. I knew what was at risk, and the only way to get what I want is to go through those risks.

"See you then, Nefta," he said, and I heard the faint clunk of his boots as he walked away. His shoes were heavy, but he walked with the kind of grace that dancers did.

I flopped backwards onto my bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. I was pissed at myself for how I treated him, but I was also somewhat pissed at how incapable everyone seemed to think I was. I was skinny and small, but I wasn't some average human. I was a mutant, altered by years of surgeries, two serums, and years of physical abuse. I watched my brother's brains splatter the wall in front of me. I wasn't some innocent little girl. I was four years older than I thought I was. I was an adult. I wasn't a child. I'd never ever had a childhood. I didn't have parents.

Except for Father Tom.

I felt my throat tighten, and my stomach drop. I blinked, feeling tears form in my eyes, and I took in a ragged, shaky breath.

I got up from the bed, some weird part of me feeling like FRIDAY was watching me. And if FRIDAY was watching, Tony could be too. I didn't want him to see me. I knew I wasn't weak, and I didn't want him to think I was.

The shower was warm and loud, loud enough to drown out my heartbroken sobs. And no matter how much of a pervert everyone insisted Tony was, I trusted he wouldn't look at me in the shower. I cried for Father Tom, and all of the memories we'd had together. For the first friend I'd had, the man who acted like my father, who taught me what it meant to love. He'd been the first person to ever show me kindness, and now he was gone.

I cried for the people of the clergy, who had raised enough money for me to go out to New York, and follow my heart.

I cried for the friends I'd made there, who would smile at me every time I ordered a coffee, who would wave at me as I walked down the sidewalk. I cried as I thought of all the people who asked, "Hey, aren't you the girl that Father Tom took in?"

But mostly, I cried because I hadn't been there to save them.

When I woke up the next morning, swaddled in the bed sheets, my eyes were dry and crusty. I had been crying until I fell asleep. It felt a little better, but not much. I still missed everyone. I still felt like a piece of my heart was missing without Father Tom there.

I got out of bed, and changed into a new outfit that I had brought with me. There were crease marks from where they had been folded, but I didn't mind. I didn't have an iron, either. I wore dark gray leggings, a black tank top, and black off-brand tennis shoes. They were my workout clothes. I could feel the large tears in the back of the shirt from my wings, but I didn't mind. I didn't know what Steve was going to make me do in the gym this morning, and the fewer clothes I had to ruin, the better.

"FRIDAY, what time is it?" I asked the empty room, hoping I didn't look completely ridiculous talking to thin air.

Nobody answered for a second, and I thought that I had just made a compete fool of myself. "It's 6:02," Miss Nefta." Said a voice from nowhere.

"Miss Nefta," I murmured to myself, remembering when Steve had called me ma'am.

"I apologize. I would refer to you by your last name, but according to my databases, you don't have one," FRIDAY interrupted my thoughts.

I shook my head, and then wondered if FRIDAY could register that. "Oh, no. It's okay, FRIDAY. Just calling me Nefta is fine. You don't have to worry about all of the miss stuff."

"Very well, Nefta," she responded. She? I mean, it was a computer. Was I allowed to call it a female?

I sat down on the bed, unsure of what to do. I rolled my shoulders back, feeling my wings ripple under my skin, and the tears in the shirt pull against my skin. I always did it when I was nervous. It seemed to calm me down, for some reason. It just let me know that I could escape, if I ever needed to. It was only six, and my meeting with Steve was at eight.

"FRIDAY, is anyone awake right now?" I asked.

"Master Stark is in his laboratory right now. He is working on a project."

I stood up from my bed. I could thank him for taking me in (if he even knew I was here. Was he aware?), and ask him if he'd made any progress on the serum I'd given him. I was curious and terrified to know if it'd had some other effect on me that I had no idea about. "What floor is that?"

She answered, "The top ten floors are dedicated to research and development. Master Stark is on the top floor."

"Thank you," I said, stepping out of my room into the long hallway. There were several rooms, and I knew that a couple were vacant. I didn't know if they were for team members who had decided not to live at Avengers Tower, like Thor, and occasionally Clint and Natasha, or if Tony was anticipating adding more people to the team.

The elevator made absolutely no noise as it cruised up to the top floor. It frightened me at first, because all of the other elevators I'd been in had made noise before. I guess Tony was just that advanced.

Speaking of Tony, when I reached his lab, the elevator doors opening silently, I saw him. He was hunched over his desk, peering into a microscope, looking at a small dish. I noticed on a wall too his right, there were several cages filled with mice. They were scrambling around, the wheels rolling, the water dispenser clicking.

"Tony," I said, my voice breaking the ambient noise.

He jumped slightly, nearly taking his eye out on the microscope. "Birdman! How're you doing? Pepper told me you came to stay. She seems to have taken a liking to you. Probably because you're a girl. She has a thing for girl Avengers. You should see her, Nat, and Wanda. They're like the Powerpuff Girls."

"Thanks so much for taking me it," I told him, taking a seat at one of the spin-y chairs across from the table from him. "My apartment kind of sucked."

He nodded, "Steve told me you were watching Spongebob. How heartbreaking is that? I'm so glad you're here. Now you can watch quality television, like Family Guy."

"He told you I was watching Spongebob?" I said with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, not exactly. He tried, though. He said you were watching SpongeRobert. He tried. He sure as hell didn't succeed, but he put a little effort into it."

I smiled, and rocked back and forth in the chair. Of course Steve got the name wrong.

I needed to apologize to him later. I had overreacted. Some part of me was worried he wouldn't forgive me, but another part told me he would. I was torn.

"What progress have you made with the serum I gave you?" I asked, trying to get my mind off of the guilt I felt from yelling at Steve.

"I'm glad you asked. I have a couple theories to test," he said, getting up from his desk, and nearly strutting over to the shelf by the mice cages. I could hear the gentle clanging of glass as he sorted through the flasks.

I continued rocking back and forth in the chair, ignoring the faint nausea I got. "Like what?"

"Think fast!" Tony cried, turning back towards me, and whipping a glass bottle towards my face.

"Ahh!" I screamed, hitting the floor with a heavy thud. The glass whizzed over my head, as my heart pounded in my ears. It shattered on the elevator doors behind me.

Tony groaned, "Damn it, Nefta! You were supposed to punch it, or something."

"Punch glass?" I half-screeched, scrambling to my feet.

He gave a whole new meaning to the phrase 'mad scientist'.

He shrugged. "I mean, yeah. I wanted to test a theory."

"What theory?" I said, my heart still pounding. My eyes watched his hands, making sure he wasn't going to throw another glass at me.

"Remember in the Hydra base, you ripped those bolts off from the wall? You shouldn't have been able to do that. Those were firmly bolted into the cement, and you tore them down like tissue paper. I haven't confirmed it yet, and I probably won't unless you cooperate," he gave me a dirty look, like I had ruined his experiment by not punching the glass. "But I think you have some kind of heightened strength. Rogers has it too, and if they were trying to replicate his serum, it would make sense that they achieved that."

I shook my head, "I don't think so. Those bolts were weak, and I was filled with adrenaline. I don't know if you should keep barking up that tree. And please don't throw anything else at me to test a theory. I'll cooperate, you know. Tell me to punch something, and I will, but I'm not going to punch glass. That's ridiculous."

"Fine," Tony said in a disappointed voice. "I've tried injecting the mice with a little of the serum. We can see what kind of effect it has on them after it's settled. I still think I'm right, though. I always am."

"I'm working out with Steve this morning," I told him, "I guess we can try your theory out. You know, without any glass breaking. But I don't think you're on the right path. When Sam took me into the base, he had a firm grip on me, and I couldn't break loose. If I had super strength or whatever, shouldn't I have been able to?"

He didn't answer my question. "So, you and Steve, huh? On a first name basis and everything?" Tony purred, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"I call you by your first name, too, Tony, just like do with anyone else." I said, but my face turned bright red at the thought of what he was implying.

He leaned back against the table full of glass instruments. "Yeah, right, Tomato. So, you're working out with him, huh? Getting all hot and sweaty together? It's great practice for the future."

I didn't answer. My bright tomato face did the answering for me.

"What time are you meeting him?" he asked, pushing away from the table, and going back to his microscope.

"Eight in the gym. Where's the gym?"

"43rd floor. We have about an hour, that's enough to do what I want to do. Take a seat," he told me, and I sat down on one of the lab stools, still shaking a little from my near-glass encounter.

He approached my left arm, or lack thereof. He pushed his thick-rimmed glasses up his nose, and peered at the stump. He tilted his head, reminding me remarkably of an owl. An annoying, cocky owl, but still an owl.

"FRIDAY, shoot me some measurements." He said, and I almost responded, but the AI did instead. It would take a while for me to get used to.

"Circumference of 10.724 inches, 3.981 inches off from the joint."

He nodded, and stepped back from my arm. "Keep those measurements, Friday," he said.

I remembered what Fury had said, "You opened Director Fury's memo about getting me a prosthetic?" I asked. "he said you never open them."

"Oh, no. I open them, I just don't reply to them, or listen to them. But Steve reminded me last night, so I had to remember to get your measurements before you do anything. I'm not sure how long this will take. I'm thinking of giving you an arm like the one Rhodey and I have on our suits, but that will take a little while longer, because I'll have to build a miniature arc reactor to give you the blasts that we have." I wasn't sure if he was speaking to me, or just thinking out loud. It was hard for me to tell.

"Thank you so much, Tony," I said a bit loudly, just in case he was off in his own little world.

He didn't even look up as he searched around his desk, looking for the pieces he needed. "Huh? Oh yeah, sure thing kiddo. Just know that if you break it, I'll murder you."

I laughed, "Okay, sure. Do you mind if I stay here until it's time for Steve and I?"

"Yeah, you can wait for your date here," he said absent-mindedly.

"It's not a date," I reminded him. "It's a mandatory workout that Director Fury is making me go to."

Tony shrugged. "It's a date, Birdman."

Update- mom is still yelling at me from downstairs. I haven't said a word back, and she's telling me to calm the fuck down.? Love life.

Anyway, you know the drill. Favorite, follow, review, etc.

-ElleLupin