Author's Note: Hello, humans. How are you all on this lovely day? Still not magical? I know, it's sad.

Anyway, I'm here to present my new Harry Potter story. I'm super excited about this one! I've always wanted to write a harem story. This plot came to me out of nowhere, and it stuck like gum. So, like a good little writer I went and surrendered myself to the computer until I had something I liked.

Please, tell me what you guys think, okay?

Disclaimer: I do not own anything related to Harry Potter. Unfortunately. I'm just gonna have to deal with this.

When Harry Potter, freshly made twenty-one, walked into Gringotts on that Friday afternoon, he would never have guessed that his life would change in such dramatic and bizarre way. In fact, he was only expecting a normal meeting with Ragnok. The letter he had received said absolutely nothing about what the problem was, only that he was needed immediately at the bank.

So, when he walked into the all too familiar office, he was not worried at all, just curious about the sudden calling.

It all changed when the following words came out of Ragnok's mouth.

"Mr. Potter, I'm sorry, but it appears that your situation is about to become a lot more complicated than we had anticipated."

"Please, no more bad news." Yes, he was begging. Slightly. It was humiliating, but honestly, he couldn't handle any more bad news. He already had a lifetime of bad news in his short years. There couldn't be anymore.

"Well, that sincerely depends on your point of view, Mr. Potter. Many would consider themselves to be incredibly lucky," The goblin had a solemn face, and yet Harry had a nagging feeling that he was taking great enjoyment out of the situation.

"Yes, yes. Isn't my life just that?" He added sarcastically. "A lot of terrible situations that all the wizarding world finds great and envy-worth? Just tell me already."

"Well in addition to the Black and Potter title, it appears that you are the sole heir to other five houses," The damn goblin said that very matter factly.

"No, not seven," So, he was whining. He had just learned he was to be married to seven different people; he was allowed a little whining.

"I'm afraid so Mr. Potter, or should I say, Mr. Potter-Black-Gryffindor-Slytherin-Peverell-Dumbledor-Le Fey?"

"Fuck you," He answered, beyond annoyed with the situation. "Can't believe Dumbledork left me as his heir. Good God."

Ragnok only laughed, still very entertained by the misery Harry was so lovely presenting.

"So, do you have anyone in mind?" He asked, half joking and half seriously.

"Oh yes, definitely. I'm so choosing from the line of followers standing outside." Harry Potter could be very sarcastic when he wanted to, and at that moment, he really wanted to. "Maybe I'll marry you, and save myself the trouble."

"As if I'd lower myself into marrying a youngling like yourself," Ragnok responded, lifting his chin and adopting the posture of an offended pure-blood lord.

"Ouch, you wound me," He said with all the dignity he could muster. "No, seriously, Hermione will be Lady Black for sure. She has all the poise, the power and the thirst for knowledge. It's a perfect fit, I can't imagine anybody else but her — and she would kill me if I choose another. The fact that she's a Muggle-born is just a plus really; it will end all of this 'Toujours pur.' shit."

"A fine choice," The Head-Goblin conceded with a nod of the head, although Harry was confident that if Hermione were in the room, he wouldn't have admitted that. "A little predictable, though," He added with a smirk.

"What can I say, that's my middle name," He shrugged. "Even though Hermione swears it's 'oblivious.'"

"A fitting name," Ragnok mocked, looking way too happy. "And I suppose Miss. Weasley is to be the next Lady Potter?"

"Of course," Harry added before he was interrupted by Hermione's arrival.

"Good afternoon gentlemen," Hermione Granger, war heroine, and young prodigy, politely greeted as soon as she crossed the entryway.

"You're late." So late, like two whole hours late. That was very unlike her, and it became even more disturbing when she didn't apologize for it as soon as she arrived.

"Yes Harry, I'm very aware of my lateness, no need to be rude. I apologize, but working in the Ministry sometimes obliges me to scream at other workers personally until they do what needs to be done." She smiled a little at the end and, only because he knew her so well, was he able to see the mischief lurking behind it. It always impressed Harry the poise she had all the time these days, her posture and behavior were worthy of any pureblood lady, no doubts.

"And I have every confidence that you did it in the most lovely way possible," Harry added, sarcastically.

"Of course, nothing else would be acceptable," She replied with a wink. Then, turning to Ragnok, she continued. "I had hoped matters wouldn't be so serious but, from the number of papers I see on your table, it seems I was unquestionably wrong."

"Miss. Granger, beautiful as always," The Head-Goblin compliment was a tradition between the two of them, and it was received as it always was, with a nod of acceptance and a little smile. "And, again, as always, right too. Mr. Potter finds himself in the position of having to marry seven different people to assume the seven titles that are, currently, associated with his name."

"Seven you say?" The brightest witch of her age said, turning to stare at her boyfriend. "You just can't do simple, can you?"

"It's not my fault all of these weird things keep happening to me, honestly," He stated, rolling his eyes. "I have no idea how I'm going to do this."

"Yes, about that, I was about to suggest, right before Miss. Granger arrival, that The Announcement be made," The Head-Goblin said, pushing the paper with the houses names to Hermione.

"Did I just hear someone mentioning The Announcement in here?" Ginny's voice cut through the air with sheer force. The years had been immensely kind to the youngest Weasley; no one could deny that.

"Yes, Miss. Weasley, I just did." If that was even possible, Ginny's arrival seemed to make Ragnok smile even wider. Surely this meeting couldn't be so entertaining? "How nice of you to join us."

"Don't get cute with me Goblin, managing a Quidditch team is not as easy as sitting at this old table all day," She said, not even twitching. Unlike the conspirational friendship the Head-goblin shared with Hermione, his and Ginny's relationship was one of constant disagreement. And they couldn't be happier about it.

"Yes, I'm sure managing thirty people, as opposed to the thousand I employ here, is a very tiring job," He deadpanned, raising an eyebrow. "But, alas, we don't have time to discuss this matter today, unfortunately. Your Mr. Potter finds himself in the position of being applicable to The Announcement."

"I have no idea what this is," Harry said while pulling a chair for Ginny to sit.

"No, you wouldn't," Hermione appeared to be a thousand miles away while speaking. "It has not been used in the wizarding world for many centuries, and it wasn't a very common tradition even then. In fact, I believe it was only used five other times here in Britain." She added, handing the paper in her hands to Ginny.

"It's only used when a single person holds more than four titles to his name, and exclusively if those houses are Nobles and Ancients Houses," She continued, before looking his way and mocking. "With these very specifics conditions, it's no wonder it's so rare. Trust you to be the one to do something so unusual."

"If he chooses to do this you are so being the link," Ginny said. "I'll never have the patience to deal with all the absurd candidates."

"Link? What link? Could somebody just explain what the hell is this shit?"

"Calm down Harry, of course, I'll explain," Hermione patted his leg comfortingly. "The Announcement is just what the same suggests, an announcement. You'll announce to the population that you are in need of five different marriages, with whichever specification you desire. Then you'll select two Lords — they need to be already married — to represent you, alongside with a link. A link is a person you're already in a relationship with. In that case, me, apparently." She said, glaring at Ginny, who was smiling angelically. "Anyway, this three people will receive the resumes, if you will, of the ones interested, and select, usually, three times the numbers of people needed by the Lord in question." She poked him in the ribs to illustrate who she was talking about, although it really wasn't needed, especially with that force. "Anyway, these, in your case, fifteen people, will then participate in the meetings. Gatherings that will happen every week for three months and will allow for the contestants to try and win you over. In the last meeting, you'll present marriage proposals to the ones chosen."

"What? You want me to choose the people I'll spend the rest of my life with, in a competition?" He felt almost betrayed that she would consider something like that.

"Harry, I know this may seem like a barbarian concept for you, but try to see it from the practical point of view," Ginny intervened before they could start arguing. "It would take you a lifetime to meet five different people you liked and that were available at the same time. You'd never have time for anything else. Not to mention that The Announcement will give you a chance of meeting people you'd never talk to if it weren't for this opportunity."

"And it would also give the ladies a chance to get to know the others at the same time as you, Mr. Potter," Ragnarok added, pointing to the women at his both sides. "That often makes for an easier life for all involved."

"Fine, even if I agreed with this insanity, what if I don't like any of the participants? Or if I don't like five of them?" He asked, biting his lip.

"Well, the possibilities are very low indeed, as these people will be chosen for you by those who know you," The goblin answered. "But, if it did happen, you would have to start it all again, as you would be bound to The Announcement."

"Bound? Are you kidding?" Harry got up and started walking around the office, visibly nervous. "You guys can't seriously expect me to agree to this madness. No way."

With this, he strode out of the room without a single word of farewell.

"That went well," Ginny joked, happy to not contribute to the situation.

AN2: Harry is freaking out. What's new? *wink*

Anyway, before anyone comes saying that Ragnok is not actually the Head-Goblin in the books, I wanna make it clear that I'm aware of this. I just took some creative license. Don't sue me.

And, if you guys want someone on the Harem, feel free to tell me. I still haven't decided all of the characters I want in it, so I'm accepting suggestions. I can't wait to hear your ideas.