A/N: For whatever reason, thanks to a dream I had last night, (I love how all my dreams seem to be Code Geass related) I decided to create a one-shot in which we relive Shirley's death from Rolo's point of view. Why? Heck if I know. My brain is weird. Rolo isn't even a character I care for much, yet here we are.

Warnings: This one-shot is somewhat angst centered and things may get slightly odd later since this whole story was spawned by a dream that I had last night. (Again, I love the fact that my dreams are often Code Geass related. It makes my job so much easier.) I did something different with my writing style too.

Regular: Normal narrative and dialogue

Italics: Thoughts

Bold italics: Eh, you'll see. To explain it would spoil it.

Disclaimer: I do not own the beautiful works of Code Geass. I wish I did though. I'd be overjoyed.

"There is a place where time stands still.

Raindrops hang motionless in the air. Pendulums of clocks float mid-swing. Dogs raise their muzzles in silent howls. Pedestrians are frozen on the dusty streets, their legs cocked as if held by strings. The aromas of dates, mangoes, coriander, cumin are suspended in space.

As a traveler approaches this place from any direction, he moves more and more slowly. His heartbeats grow farther apart, his breathing slackens, his temperature drops, his thoughts diminish, until he reaches dead center and stops. For this is the center of time."

This quote was taken from Alan Lightman's novel Einstein's Dreams

I can't remember how many people I've killed.

Rolo Lamperouge stood before Shirley Fennette within Ikebukuro train station, staring into leaf-green eyes that radiated with a firm resolve. Briefly his eyes darted to the gun in her pale hand. The vice grip she held on it should have frightened him considering his age and the sensitive persona he had showcased throughout his time at Ashford Academy, but instead he was calm, revealing his true nature. He was a trained assassin capable of far more damage with just a mere thumb tact than Shirley could ever deal out with the gun she held.

"Rolo, tell me," she murmured softly, a sparkle of uncertainty spilling into the eyes currently holding the majority of his attention. "Do you love Lulu?"

The mere mention of the nickname almost made the younger teen stiffen, mainly because a part of him was still uncertain about how he felt. Despite all the assurances he had given, Rolo wasn't entirely sure if Lelouch really wanted to look out for him. After all, he was still very intent on finding Nunnally, on replacing him with his "real" sibling.

He was jealous of that, jealous of the fact that Lelouch loved her so dearly to the point where he would suffer endlessly in an effort to change this horrible world. Rolo knew better. There was no changing the world. As an assassin, he had seen the worst of it over and over again and while he believed that his brother could achieve his mission in making a peaceful world for his sister, there was no guarantee that such a world would last long-term.

Lelouch himself may not even see the results of his tireless efforts.

Shirley's question, while simple in nature, prompted a great deal of complicated thoughts surrounding his "older brother". If he were to be honest with himself, he would say that he did love Lelouch. After all, he was the only family he'd ever known. However, whether that brotherly love was returned was another story, a question that pricked the edges of Rolo's subconscious on a daily basis. Lelouch had a keen ability of persuasion, even without his Geass, and his lineage as a prince served him well, granting him impeccable charisma and leadership skills. He was also a common man, living out his days among ordinary people with ordinary dreams for happiness. He was a traumatized child, a boy who understood heartache better than most his age should while also being metaphorically similar to a vampire. Nothing but the blood of his father would satisfy his need for vengeance. However, to survive he needed to spill copious amounts of the crimson liquid wherever he went.

His brother Clovis, his sister Euphemia, the Japanese he unintentionally ordered the deaths of, the civilians of Narita, Brtiannian soldiers, his own comrades, and countless others had died for the same collection of purposes. The first was to eliminate the emperor, Charles Zi Britannia.

The second was to create a gentler world for the blind and crippled brat currently playing viceroy. Just seeing a glimpse of her angelic face made Rolo sick to his stomach.

"What are you saying, Shirley," he responded swiftly without showing a hint of his inner turmoil. "He's my brother, of course I love him."

The smile that broke across her face almost took his breath away. Despite never being very fond of Shirley, he could admit to himself that her smile was the best thing about her. She had a way of making the sun shine with just a glimmer of teeth and the slight brightening of the green in her eyes.

"Then, that means you're on his side, right? Right?"

Rolo noticed Shirley's grip relax on the gun. He wondered what would have happened if he had responded differently.

She would have killed me.

A memory from just a few days ago came to him. Viletta had been making an offhanded remark to Lelouch, stating how Shirley was the perfect girl to exchange hats with for Milly's graduation event because she loved him, enough to kill if necessary.

Viletta hadn't phrased it quite like that, but it was all the same to Rolo.

Lelouch, exhibiting quiet concern, simply stated that it was for that reason he didn't wish Shirley to be part of his life.

And yet now she stands here, directly defying his wish.

"Please, let me join you!" she shouted, her tone reflecting desperation as she brought her free hand up towards her chest. Laying her palm over her heart she continued, saying, "I want Lulu to be safe too. I can help you protect him!"

His violet eyes transformed into sharp razor blades of brilliant color, showcasing a wariness toward the orange-haired beauty who often took her infatuation with his brother too far. She couldn't be trusted. She would do more harm than good to him.

For a few split seconds between Shirley's previous statement and the words that followed, Rolo contemplated methods of subduing the problems she presented without resulting to his default setting, which was to kill. After all, Lelouch had asked him to behave differently, to use his Geass for the purpose of protection rather than assassination. If Rolo had learned anything from his brother, it was to look for different solutions to problems. Ending a life wasn't always the best answer, even if it was the easiest and most certain route to take. In the situation, Rolo understood what killing Shirley would mean for Lelouch. He had spent enough time with him to know that she was important to him and that her death would affect him strongly. Though not in tune with his own emotions, Rolo understood his brother's nature fairly well, could almost read into the core of it, though there were very poignant pieces missing in his analysis.

This situation required delicacy. He would need to knock her out for now and send her off somewhere to prevent her from acting recklessly. He would need to make sure she stayed away until after Lelouch's war was finished. This assignment would be a hindrance for him considering his duties as a Black Knight and brother, but it couldn't be helped. To let Shirley into the folds of the Black Knights would lead to disaster. If anything happened to her, Rolo wasn't sure how Lelouch would take it or if he could take it.

Unfortunately, those few split seconds of consideration came to a screeching halt when Shirley continued, shouting, "I want to bring all the happiness back into his life! Then, maybe he can be together with his sister Nunna!"

Suddenly rage skyrocketed through his system. Unable to control the intense fire of hatred that ignited the second he heard Nunnally's nickname, Rolo activated his Geass, surrounding the unsuspecting girl within a force field of red. A scream retched itself out of his throat less than a second after he called upon the power. It was a guttural sound that would have sent a shockwave of terror through the orange-haired girl had she been able to hear him. Perhaps a scream would have passed through her lips, prompting her to bolt away. She would have held the gun tightly as she ran but wouldn't have let out a single shot towards him. After all, in her mind, Rolo was as much Lelouch's brother as Nunnally was his sister.

However, Shirley had no real knowledge of Geass or of the fact that Rolo had stopped her sense of time. She had no clue that her words had brought out a monster fueled by despair and envy. She wasn't aware of Rolo's past as an assassin or the fact that her words had forced his mind to reset to its default settings with the additive of wrath.

When she blinked, Rolo was less than six inches in front of her. With a startled cry she stepped back in astonishment, and when the initial shock wore off, confusion dominated her expression as she glanced back and forth between where Rolo had been standing and where he had reappeared. The continuous glances back and forth would have been comical if not for what the boy said next.

"There's nothing you can do for him."

Before Shirley could respond, Rolo activated his Geass again. Having expressed his rage through blood curdling screams the girl didn't hear, he moved a little slower this time around. With methodical movements he reached into the inside pocket of his Ashford blazer. With quicker movements he placed the gloves he withdrew over his hands before reaching for the gun Shirley held. Without uttering a word he took a small step back, then pulled the trigger. There was no hesitation, no remorse. He was back to being the assassin he had been during his time at the Geass Order under V.V.'s command, long before Lelouch, Shirley, or anyone else began to influence him.

However, despite reverting to his old self, Rolo hadn't shot to kill.

He had shot to inflict suffering.

The effects of his Geass wore off again just as the bullet hit. The hot lead tore through her insides before escaping her body in a single loud echo of sound.

Rolo almost smiled at the pure look of horror that crossed her features as he used his Geass one final time, aware of his heart painfully pounding against his ribcage when he placed her gun back in her hand. The power faded shortly after and the effort it took to breathe heightened.

Still, even with the ache in his chest, Rolo felt more alive than he had in the course of his entire life.

Rocking back on her heels, Shirley stumbled backward, unable to fathom why she was falling until after she fell. Blood began to pool out from under her, staining the light colored clothes she wore.

With sharp footsteps the assassin carried himself to her side, a look of contempt etched in his features as he looked down upon her.

She stared back at him, her confusion now laced with terror. "Rolo...why?"

"I told you," he muttered, his violet gaze colder than anything Lelouch could ever hope to muster. "You can't do anything for him. He doesn't need you and he doesn't need Nunnally either. All the two of you have ever done is cause him pain. He can't even look at you two without feeling regret and sorrow, but he can look at me and remember the good times we've had." Turning away from her he added, "I turned my back on my whole way of life to support Lelouch while she's been content to let him suffer alone."

Shirley sucked in a shuddering breath as her body started to shake. "That's...not true...Nunna..."

"Don't say her name," Rolo cut in, a bitter laugh escaping him. "I hate her and everything she stands for. She's in the way. If you brought her and Lelouch together again, I'd end up alone."

"Y-you're wrong...Rolo..."

The younger teen inclined his gaze over his shoulder, an incredulous look in his eyes. "Am I? Am I really, Shirley?"

Silence met his answer but not because the girl didn't have a rebuttal. She did, but that was lost to the dizziness threatening to claim her.

If not for that taking over her focus, she would have told Rolo that Lelouch could love them both. It didn't have to be just Nunnally or just him. All three of them could be happy together. Shirley was certain of that. She just couldn't say it. She didn't have the strength.

Without another word, Rolo left her lying there, deciding to wait in the wings until Lelouch arrived and saw his handiwork. Truthfully, the boy wasn't proud of what he had done. He had acted on an impulse, but he could easily trick Lelouch into thinking he had done this out of fear that she was out to kill the man who had murdered her father.

The exiled prince would choose to believe in Shirley's love for him. Being the kindhearted person she was, she wouldn't say anything about Rolo shooting her or even about his thinly veiled threat to kill Nunnally as soon as he got the chance. Shirley would use her final moments to express her love for Lelouch, to say how she wanted to be someone who would be truthful to him, someone who wouldn't hide behind a mask.

I can't remember how many people I've killed.

However, eliminating Shirley Fennette was the first kill I enjoyed. When I am face to face with Nunnally Vi Britannia, she will be the second and last.

After that mission is complete, Lelouch and I will continue to live on as brothers at Ashford Academy, enjoying simple days without them around to trouble us, and when Japan is free from Britannian rule, our future will finally begin.

Moving forward, Rolo realizes that the mask of a younger brother is what holds him to this world. He lives for the future he may never grasp in his hand. Deep in the core of his soul he realizes Lelouch's true intent. He knows Lelouch hates him and is only keeping him around because of his Geass ability. Rolo is no fool. He's seen the worst of the world and the worst of his brother too. He is Zero, after all, the masked terrorist who will stop at nothing to fix this rotten world for the person he loves most in the world, even if she is against him and his method in every single way.

It is not Rolo's goal to replace Nunnally, not really. What he wants is to have his own place in Lelouch's heart. By the end of this war he wants to have gained his brother's love or even just a hint of care from the man that made him human.

His actions today won't help him. He knows killing Shirley was a mistake on some level, but refuses to let himself regret it more than he needs to. What's done is done and while his Geass can alter a person's sense of time, he is unable to turn back the clock and reverse the damage created by his sins.

But then, no one else is capable of that either.

Time marches forward. It never stops and it never retreats. It is only capable of altering its rate of movement as it toils from moment to moment. In the same way, Rolo cannot completely revert to who he was before nor can he be an entirely different person. He can only evolve into a more complete self as time goes on. That is what makes him human even if his actions reflect those of a demon.

Still, what would happen if time decided to move in reverse?

The next morning, when Rolo awoke, he was immediately aware that something was amiss.

After the events that had taken place in Ikebukuro Station, Lelouch had violently set about finding the location of the Geass Order to which Rolo and their new ally, Jeremiah Gottwald, were all too happy to give. The meeting between the three men had been a very tense one, and Rolo had no doubt that Shirley's death was the cause of Lelouch's hostile demeanor. However, despite his knowledge of Rolo's crime, he said very little about it and even praised the boy for it.

His overwhelmingly positive review on Rolo's choice was a dead giveaway. Lelouch wasn't happy about the situation at all, but the younger teen ignored this, opting to place his trust in the hope that the older teen would be merciful in delivering his eventual punishment.

When the meeting was done, the two boys returned to their quarters in Ashford Academy. Lelouch went straight to his room without so much as word while Rolo went to grab dinner in the kitchen. For a while he simply sat at the island bar, twirling his favorite switchblade in his left hand with fitful, sporadic movements as he ate using his right. The events of the day were slowly coming back to him, playing out like a strange film.

Everything had started normally enough. He worked on homework in the O.S.I. security room and had a pleasant, although short, conversation with Lelouch as he left for Ikebukuro.

Jeremiah's appearance is what threw things off for the entire day. That cybernetic man had really caused a ruckus, killing two of the school's security guards in his search for Lelouch. How ironic that he was on their side now after learning his sworn enemy was the late Empress Marianne's presumably dead son who was once 17th in line to inherit the throne of the Holy Britannian Empire.

He had a powerful ability to negate the effects of Geass. It was that ability that allowed Shirley to regain her memories. It was also this ability that nearly got him and Sayoko killed. Had it not been for Viletta, Jeremiah would have ended them both.

Still, her action to tell Jeremiah exactly where Lelouch had gone is what really sent the day into a tailspin for him. The entire time Sayoko was being treated for her injuries he had sat fuming, wondering why Viletta would betray them until she explained herself and arranged for him and Sayoko to fly over to the station undetected. By that time his nerves were at their highest. He knew his brother was an excellent strategist but Jeremiah had become a literal killing machine. With how physically weak Lelouch was, he didn't stand a chance.

Just thinking of what could have happened terrified him.

And then he'd run into Shirley.

Looking back on it now, Rolo began to feel more shame for his actions though he questioned the reason why. He did what he did to protect Lelouch, didn't he?

Deep down he knew the answer to his own question, but ignored it in favor of believing he'd done the right thing.

He stayed in the living room for most of the night, watching the news coverage of the chaos that had erupted hours prior until he fell asleep on the couch dressed head to toe in his school uniform.

So, when Rolo woke up, he had expected to be on the couch still clothed in his school uniform from head to toe. Instead he was lying in his bed, wearing his pajamas and what woke him was the sun shinning in through his window, just as it had yesterday. When he looked at his clock on the nightstand it read the exact same time it had the previous morning when the sun's light had forced him awake.

Did Lelouch...no he wouldn't have...

Sitting up in bed, Rolo stretched his arms over his head before swinging his legs over the side of the bed. Once his feet were on the floor, he hoisted himself up, feeling refreshed. With a soft sigh he inclined his head toward his desk where his workbook haphazardly lay.

The teen raised an eyebrow at the sight of it. He had left the book in the O.S.I. facility yesterday. Did Viletta bring it back? He quickly decided she hadn't because even if she noticed the forgotten workbook, she wouldn't have cared enough to bring it to him. Once again he wondered if Lelouch had brought it up, but given the circumstances of the previous day, that wasn't likely.

Thoroughly confused, Rolo walked over to the desk quietly, his hand reaching for the book with slight hesitance. Once the book was in his hands, he opened it to his assignment that was due today. The page was void of any of his writings from the day before which not only caused a glimmer of suspicion to swell up in his mind but a sense of bewilderment which increased even further when he realized that there were no hints of erasing anywhere on the page or even a tiny, faded remnant of what he'd written. It was as if he hadn't worked on it at all.

Unsure of what to think, he opened one of the drawers of his desk, searching for the personal log he kept. He wrote in it every day, even if it was just to record the date. He had written in it yesterday with a firm hand as complaints about a difficult assignment had rolled from the pen. At the same time he had mentioned being glad that Lelouch was back at Ashford as well as being glad that Milly had finally departed from the campus. In fact the boy expressly remembered writing, "She's the only person in the world aside from my brother and V.V. that I find intimidating."

However, when he opened the small pocketbook to where his entry would have been, he found it missing just as the equations written down in his workbook were missing. There was no date written either. It was just a blank page.

What...what's happening!?

The assassin stepped away from his desk, dropping the log on the floor as he backed away. From the corner of his eye he noticed his reflection in the full-length mirror as well as a glimmer of red in his left eye.

His heart stopped.

Turning, he faced his reflection fully only to jump back in horror.

His right eye was glowing red without his consent, sending out a wave of red ahead of him through the walls and across the academy. He was able to stop the wave of red from expanding much farther than the whole of the campus, but the Geass itself didn't dissipate, even after the time limit had been reached. Black spots were beginning to dance along his vision, stealing it away little by little as he became shrouded in complete darkness.

Am I dying? My Geass is out of control! What do I do? How do I stop it!?

You don't. This is your punishment, Rolo Lamperouge, for defying the laws of time.

Rolo couldn't make sense of the voice that spoke to him. He fell to his knees, tears streaming out from his eyes as he begged for something to save him.

If you don't wish to die, then you must correct your mistake and make things right. Only then can you live.

"I'll do anything," he rasped out, closing his eyes as he completely fell against the carpet. "Please...I want to stay with my brother."

Very well, I shall give you the tools to fix the damage caused by your actions. However, if in seven days you fail to open your heart, it will cease to beat and your soul will be condemned. Do you accept these conditions?

"YES!"

With his shout of acceptance, the red light emanating from his eyes diminished. Time once again began its flow.

A/N: Did I call this a one-shot. My bad. I meant to say that this is a multi-chapter story. After all, it's based on a dream. Also, while this story started out in a very angst centered place, the tone is going to lighten up...somewhat. I think. Not sure yet. Stay tuned. Special thanks to Shadow at Midnight for being one of the people that inspired this work. Be sure to check out his stories. He's great! Thanks for reading guys! Let me know what you think in that comment box below.