For the first time in what seems like forever, nobody in the Matsuno household catches the flu.

It's a winter miracle, honestly—when they're all cooped up together in one tiny room for so long with viruses whizzing about every time one of them goes out, it's almost become a tradition to have the requisite week-long stay in bed, too miserable and feverish and achy to do much more than take little sips of water and eat whatever gentle foods mom brings them until they're well again.

It's almost cause for celebration.

In fact, it is cause for celebration, Osomatsu decides, and he drags them all out into the blustery evening wind to the nearest bar for drinks. They've got just enough to cover it—this bartender isn't as lenient (or easy to outrun) as Chibita, but they're all in such good spirits they don't really mind having to pay for it.

They're well into their sixth round (Juushimatsu is snoring, Ichimatsu looks about ready to drop as well, and Todomatsu's face has gone pink enough to match his sweater) when Choromatsu blinks at his brothers. "Hhhey," he slurs, trying to take stock of…"are we…did someone go out or…or somffing?"

"Mmm…no?" Osomatsu is slightly more sober, so he tries to count around the table, "There's…you, then…Ichimatsu, Juushimatsu, Todomatsu, and…wait that's only four? We're missing…oh, I forgot to count me," he giggles to himself. "So that's…five. Wait. We're six. Where's…?"

"Oh," Todomatsu pipes up, blinking sleepily at him, "uhh Karamatsu-niisan said…he said…something about guitar, I think…? He was gonna…play guitar. Yeah."

Osomatsu's brows furrow, "Oh…so he didn't wanna come?"

Todomatsu shakes his head.

"Hmm…what a drag…" Osomatsu rests his head on his arms, "We're s'posed to be celebrating…don't see how playing stupid guitar is more important than that…"

Collective nods from those still conscious.

Eventually, they have to head home for the night, so Osomatsu hoists Juushimatsu up onto his back while Choromatsu gives Ichimatsu a (somewhat unsteady) shoulder to lean on. They stumble clumsily down the street and even more clumsily through the front door—where it's a struggle to get upstairs to their bedroom. But they manage, except now the room looks…different…than how they'd left it.

"What's…oh. Karamatsu must've…" Choromatsu makes a wide gesture toward the futon laid neatly out on the floor. And though his vision is a little hazy, he can see the man himself, curled beneath the blanket. "Huh…" he muses, "that was nice of him, I guess…"

Though the lights are on, he appears to be deeply asleep, so they all make a decent effort to step around him as they begin the fumbling process of changing into sleepwear. Osomatsu has to shake Juushimatsu awake enough to change into pjs, and Choromatsu is soundly rebuffed in all his attempts to help an increasingly-wobbly Ichimatsu into his own. Todomatsu manages fine by himself, but winds up on Choromatsu's pillow—dead asleep in less than thirty seconds—so he has to be shoved over into his own spot. And then, once they're all in bed, they realize they'd forgotten to turn off the light, so it's a mess of whines and moans over who has to stand back up until Osomatsu is voted in and does it for them.

Everyone is asleep within minutes.

If Karamatsu is curled up a little tighter than usual, or trembling just ever-so-slightly, nobody takes notice.


The next morning—well, late afternoon—is a haze of hangovers and misery, everyone groaning themselves upright as the sun streams in through the window. Choromatsu wins the award for "most hungover" when he bolts to the bathroom to throw up the second he makes it to a sitting position. Todomatsu manages only marginally better, with a little dry-heave that scares the shit out of everyone around him but ultimately brings up nothing.

So for breakfast—or, lunch? whatever—they stick with bland foods. Some white rice here, a tiny bit of protein there. Mom has set out tall glasses of water for everyone, god bless her, which they all resolve to sip sip sip in any attempt to alleviate the pounding headaches they've managed to drink themselves into.

Karamatsu is the last to join them at the table, but nobody has the energy or willpower to greet him properly. He picks at his food, mostly stares at the glass of water, and says little—or maybe nothing at all. No one's taking behavioral notes this afternoon.

It's unanimously decided that today will be a stay-at-home day, on account of how crappy everyone feels and how little they want to go out into the cold. Or get dressed. Or move in general.

Osomatsu, Choromatsu, and Todomatsu curl right back up into the futon after breakfast, each needing at least three more hours of sleep to become even remotely functioning human beings again. A cat comes to the window, Ichimatsu lets it in, and he too settles down for the day. Juushimatsu feels a little better after the water, so he decides to climb up to the roof and watch clouds for a while.

Karamatsu lays on the couch. He shivers, sniffles, stifles a few dry coughs into the crook of his elbow.

Nobody hears, nobody sees.


When Osomatsu wakes up, he's disoriented—he could've sworn the room was light when they'd gone back to bed, but now…

"Fuck," he mutters, trying to shake himself awake, "Choromatsu, Totty, wake up. It's dark out." He gives them both a little shake.

Choromatsu groans, pushing himself up onto his elbows. "What—" he blinks groggily around the room, "—what time is it?"

"It's—" Osomatsu squints at the clock, "—a little past seven. God, we slept for ages. C'mon, Totty, it's time to get up." He gives the youngest brother another nudge, who only moans in reply—though he eventually lifts his head, too.

"It's dark."

Osomatsu rolls his eyes. "Nice observation. You wanna do something?"

"Like what? It's dark."

"We could watch a movie," Choromatsu suggests, "I think mom rented one for her and dad to watch—that one about the guy on Mars? And he has to like…survive somehow? I heard it was pretty good."

Todomatsu considers for a moment. "Nngh, okay. Where's everyone else?"

Karamatsu gets a rough shake courtesy of the eldest brother, and he jumps awake immediately, a pained look flashing across his face for less than a second before he's rubbing his eyes, trying to wake himself up. "What—" he stops to clear his throat, "what are we doing?"

"We're gonna watch a movie," Osomatsu grins at him. "It's about space. You'll like it."

"Oh…okay."

A quick search finds Ichimatsu exactly where he'd placed himself hours earlier, only catless this time and snoring softly. Juushimatsu, apparently grown tired of the sky, is leaning up against him, sleeping with a big smile on his face. They are both summarily awakened.

With that done, the brothers all gather together—bringing as many extra blankets as they can find—to settle in a big heap on the futon. Nobody's eaten dinner yet, so Juushimatsu runs to the kitchen and brings back as many snacks as he can carry. Choromatsu puts the DVD in, Todomatsu turns the light off, and the opening credits roll.

It's comfortable. Juushimatsu likes to sit up on his knees, so he stays towards the back so he doesn't block anyone's view. Ichimatsu is a little distant at first—as usual—but, as the minutes drag by, he slowly creeps closer and closer to the fifth brother until he can lay his head in his lap.

Todomatsu sits somewhere in the middle—he isn't really sure what this movie is about, and if anything scary is going to happen, he wants to be as surrounded by his brothers as possible. Choromatsu is his chosen candidate for this evening's game of "who should I cuddle with while totally pretending I'm not interested in cuddling with them." They both know it's a farce, and they end up in a comfy pile of pillows within fifteen minutes.

Osomatsu likes to sit front and center—where the action is! and so does Karamatsu, usually, except…

He's sitting towards the back, as far away from the others as possible without making it too obvious he's avoiding them.

And Osomatsu wants none of that, of course. A movie isn't nearly as fun without someone to whisper a running commentary to. Karamatsu's supposed to be his partner in these things—who else is he gonna make "that's what she said" jokes to at every possible moment? So, once it becomes clear Karamatsu isn't going to join him on his own, he turns around, stands up, and ushers his somewhat hesitant brother to the front of the room. "C'mon, c'mon, be a good sport," he chides, wondering where this reluctance is coming from. "It'll be cool, I swear."

So Karamatsu follows him wordlessly and sits cross-legged at his insistence. Osomatsu pulls a blanket over the both of them, and everything is as it should be.

The movie is good, too. Todomatsu flinches a little when the storm picks up, and they all cringe when the main character has to perform emergency surgery on himself. It keeps them on their toes, which is pretty impressive considering a large chunk of the film focuses on just this one character by himself.

However, apparently it's not enough to keep everyone engaged, Osomatsu notes, when the second brother slumps against his side, sound asleep. He huffs, pulls the blanket a little tighter around Karamatsu's shoulders, and turns his attention back to the movie.

It's not until about twenty minutes later that he notices something is…weird. It's too hot. He thinks it might just be him, so he shrugs his half of the blanket off, but quickly realizes the heat is actually radiating from the body next to him. He squints in the dim light of the television, trying to get a closer look at Karamatsu's face, and when the screen suddenly goes bright white he can see how flushed he is. Like, really flushed. And he's breathing kinda funny, too, and…

"Karamatsu," he whispers, shaking him gently, "hey, wake up."

It takes an agonizingly long time for Karamatsu to open his eyes, and the first thing he does is look around the room like he doesn't know where he is—before finally settling on Osomatsu. "What's…?"

"Are you okay?"

A slow blink. "Yeah, I'm…" he thinks for a minute, "…I'm good, I just…I don't…really feel very well, actually…sorry…"

"What're you—" Osomatsu sputters, "Don't apologize, stupid. Hey, Choromatsu!" he breaks the concentration of everyone else in the room, "Can you pause the movie for a sec?"

Muttered complaints, but Choromatsu does as requested, flicking the light on for good measure. "What's the matter?"

"Karamatsu's not feeling good." That gets everyone's attention. "He's all…spacey, and way too hot."

"That's what she said," Karamatsu mumbles. Osomatsu isn't sure whether to laugh or smack him.

"Why didn't you sayanything?" Todomatsu asks, distressed. "We did all that drunk celebrating for nothing if you're sick now. Or were you…" he gapes, "you were sick yesterday, too?"

Karamatsu looks confused, and he slowly studies each face before responding, "Yeah, but…I didn't think it would matter? Nobody really noticed until now…and you guys don't, uh, usually…care, really. Like when I tell you things, you ignore me…which is, um, okay, but…"

Silence.

Then, "You gotta tell us everything now," Ichimatsu growls. "Everything we can do to help, right now."

A little dazed, Karamatsu glances around the room again. "Is—is that what you guys want?"

Everyone nods.

"Okay, um—shit," he sniffs, scrubs at his suddenly watery eyes. It's now incredibly obvious to everyone how unwell he must be feeling, and they're all awash with shame that they didn't notice before. "I didn't expect you to—okay. I guess I would like it if you, um…paid attention to me? Even a little…?"

Eyes widen as one by one they understand how messed up that request is. He shouldn't have to ask for something like that, not when he's sick…but they all know that the reality is he does have to ask for it, because nobody will give him the time of day otherwise. Nobody had even thought for a second he might be under the weather, and they probably never would have noticed if Osomatsu hadn't picked up on it just now. Their second brother doesn't think they care about him at all—and it's no wonder, really…

"Christ, Karamatsu…" Osomatsu doesn't even know where to begin, "Of course we're gonna… Okay, we're gonna take really good care of you this time. Is everybody cool with that?"

"Yeah!"

"I mean, we basically have to—"

"—since we've been—"

"—so terrible."

Karamatsu looks shocked, face frozen for a beat so long they're almost worried they've broken him. But then huge, fat tears well up in his eyes and he buries his face in the crook of Osomatsu's neck, shuddering like a house in a windstorm but making no noise at all.

"Shit…" somebody whispers—Ichimatsu. His expression is guilty, and everyone knows why.

"Hey, shh, it's okay," Osomatsu tries to soothe, wrapping his arms around his brother and petting the back of his head, "You're sick and over-emotional and we've been crappy brothers, but you don't have to cry."

"You haven't been—you haven't—"

"We have, come on. It's okay. We're gonna try to make up for it, just a little. Is there anything you want?"

He shakes his head.

Osomatsu sighs. "Okay, for now, let's—is everyone alright with stopping the movie for tonight? Karamatsu should probably get to bed ASAP."

Nobody disagrees.

"Alright, c'mon Karamatsu. You can stop crying, okay? Everything gonna be alright."

Karamatsu nods into Osomatsu's shoulder and allows himself to be maneuvered the few feet to his spot on the futon, where he sits up and finally allows Osomatsu to pull away—revealing his bright pink, blotchy, tear-streaked, snotty disaster of a face.

"Aw, you really are a mess, aren't you?" Osomatsu leans forward to plant a kiss firmly on Karamatsu's forehead. "You're burning up, too. And you thought you couldn't tell any of us this. Geez, we've been really horrible to you, haven't we?" he's mostly mumbling to himself. "Is there a box of tissues in here somewhere? And can somebody get a bowl of cool water and a washcloth? And a cup of water, and the thermometer?"

Juushimatsu jumps up and thumps down the stairs to get a bowl. Choromatsu follows him out the door at a slower pace in search of water and the thermometer. Todomatsu peeks inside the closet and quickly finds the tissues, handing them to the eldest brother. Osomatsu takes a moment to try and wipe the tears from Karamatsu's eyes—a fruitless effort, since they just keep coming—before he sighs and hands Karamatsu the box himself. "Blow your nose, okay?"

Karamatsu nods and does as he's told. It takes him four tissues, and he looks embarrassed and miserable by the time he's done. Choromatsu and Juushimatsu return at the same time—Juushimatsu sets the bowl on the floor behind Karamatsu, while Choromatsu kneels in front of him. He turns the thermometer on. "Under your tongue."

It's a long wait as both Choromatsu and Osomatsu lean in to watch the number rise—before they realize they're completely crowding Karamatsu and probably making him uncomfortable.

Choromatsu gets to it before the final beep has a chance to sound. "39.9," he announces, sighing. "How were you even hiding this?"

Karamatsu shrugs. "My…dazzling acting skills?"

Osomatsu snorts, but takes the thermometer from Choromatsu regardless so the third brother can help Karamatsu drink a little water. His hands are too shaky to hold the cup himself.

When he's had enough, Osomatsu gets him settled into bed, tucking him in much more gently than he usually would. He's just about to reach for the cloth in the bowl of water, when—"Wait."

He stops, blinks, looks around the room. He knows who the voice belongs to, but he still has to check, because—

"Can—" Ichimatsu tries again, "—can I do it? Please?"

The room goes dead silent.

Ichimatsu flounders. "I—I want to. Because…I've been the worse. And it won't make up for it or anything, but…" he's staring firmly at his feet. "Um. It's up to Karamatsu, if he doesn't want me to, then…"

Osomatsu looks to Karamatsu. His eyes are welling with tears again, but his vigorous nod couldn't make his answer any more clear.

"Okay, you got it, Ichimatsu," Osomatsu relinquishes the cloth to him. "Is everyone else ready to go to bed?"

He gets a bunch of noncommittal noises in response. They're all still in their pajamas, but most of them had slept the day away so nobody is really tired yet. Still, Karamatsu needs the rest, and everyone rustling around the room in the dark later on won't aid in that at all. They haven't bathed, and they're still kind of gross from the night before, but that can wait for now.

Todomatsu clicks the light off.


Time passes.

Ichimatsu is tired.

He's been doing this for…for…he doesn't know for how long exactly, or even what time it is now, but he knows for sure that he is tired.

Karamatsu had fallen asleep ages ago, but he's still going to keep it up, of course—he'll keep doing it until he drops. Dutifully changing the cloth every fifteen minutes. Dip it in water, wring it out, fold it into a rectangle, place it on Karamatsu's forehead. It's sort of mechanical by now. He's had to go back for fresh water twice when the water in the bowl had grown warm from fever heat, but he doesn't mind. He needs to do this, needs to do something, because he's part of the reason Karamatsu's this sick to begin with.

He'll take responsibility for anything, at this point.

Dip. Wring. Fold. Place. Dip. Wring. Fold. Place. Dip. Wring. Fold. Pl—Karamatsu's eyes open.

Ichimatsu almost shrieks. Almost. If anybody asked, he'd never admit it, but the fact that he jumps about six feet in the air likely tells it all.

"Did I scare you?" Karamatsu's voice is raspy, but he's sort of…smiling? It's hard to tell, since he's upside-down from Ichimatsu's perspective.

Ichimatsu decides to humor him. "Yes," he mutters, going to put the cloth back in place.

"Oh, you can—you can stop doing that, if you want… God, Ichimatsu, what—what time is it? Have you been awake all this time? You look tired."

This only makes Ichimatsu press the cloth more firmly to his forehead. "You look tired, stupid. Don't get all big-brotherly on me. Sick people need looking after."

"You're—" Karamatsu pauses, clearly wondering how to phrase his next thought.

He takes too long. "I...?" it comes out sharper than he'd intended, and he flinches even though Karamatsu does not.

"You…think you have to make up for being mean to me, don't you?"

Almost automatically, "I treat you like shit even though you're nice to me." It's been in the front of his mind, on the tip of his tongue, and it's out there now so he has to keep going. "And it—you're obviously all fucked up because of it. You didn't even think you could tell us you were sick? That you needed help? That's—" he chokes on his own words, hating himself, knowing he has to cut himself off before some other important thing slips out. "Never mind. It's stupid."

Karamatsu is frowning. "It's not—lay down with me for a while. Forget about the water."

Ichimatsu hesitates, but…drops the cloth back into the bowl and carefully slides down into his position in bed.

And then Karamatsu is pulling him in for a hug.

His first impulse is to push and kick because no, no, no, he does not want to be cuddled by Kusomatsu—or anyone else, for that matter. Even though that's not…true…exactly. So he forces his body to still, knowing he's far too tense for this, and wraps an arm around Karamatsu as well.

"You don't have to try and…make up for anything," Karamatsu murmurs, his breath rustling Ichimatsu's hair. "I know I'm painful and you don't really like me, so—"

"That's not—!" Ichimatsu panics, and he has to stop himself for a second. "That's not true. I don't…not like you."

He can hear Karamatsu open his mouth, then close it.

"You're definitely painful, but you're my dumb, idiot, painful older brother, so…" is that really any better? He prays Karamatsu can't feel how fast his heart is beating in his chest. "When we were kids, we all loved each other, right? And I still…do. Even now."

Silence. Then he feels a drop of water on his head.

"Hey, don't—" he protests as Karamatsu sniffles, pulling him closer, "—don't cry on me, you jerk."

"S-sorry," Karamatsu takes a moment to compose himself. "Thanks."

Ichimatsu is baffled. "For what?"

"For telling me that."

"It's not like—I should've—you didn't—even when I'm—I'll…try to be better about it, I guess." He sighs. This short conversation has been far too draining for whatever-o'-clock it is in the morning.

"You're…weirdly honest when you're tired," and now Karamatsu has the nerve to tease him.

"And you're weirdly annoying when you're awake." Though he flushes despite himself. "Go back to sleep. Sick people need sleep."

"Healthy people also need sleep."

There's not a lot of arguing with that, so Ichimatsu scoots further down, pressing the side of his head against Karamatsu's chest.

Surprised, Karamatsu asks, "What are you doing?"

"Getting comfortable. Are you comfortable?"

He considers the question. "Yeah… Goodnight, Ichimatsu."

"Goodnight, Karamatsu…niisan." That's embarrassing, but Karamatsu huffs a little laugh so it was probably worth it. Soon, he can hear his brother's breathing even out—it's regular, if a little wheezy, and more relaxing than he'd expected it to be.

What really lulls him to sleep, though, is the steady sound of the heartbeat right against his ear.


Everyone lets Karamatsu and Ichimatsu sleep in the next morning. Karamatsu for obvious reasons, and Ichimatsu because he's so entangled in Karamatsu's limbs that it would be impossible to wake him without disturbing their sick brother as well.

The minute Choromatsu sees this, he mentally chalks Ichimatsu up on his "definitely going to get sick" list and reminds himself to buy orange juice.


Of course they all catch the flu, in the end. The winter miracle is broken—but with Karamatsu up and bouncing around, trying to care for them all the second he feels better, it isn't so bad after all.

Choromatsu can barely hold anything down, Juushimatsu's ability to sleep through anything has increased tenfold, Osomatsu's voice has been reduced to a sad little whisper, Todomatsu's nose is running like a faucet, and Ichimatsu's fever could probably break records. But each and every one of them still manages to croak out a "thank you" every time Karamatsu comes around with water or broth or extra blankets or cool towels.

And each and every time, Karamatsu responds with, "It's no trouble at all, my brothers."

And they groan and roll their eyes.

But the wide grin Karamatsu flashes—because he knows they're only joking this time—somehow makes it all a little more bearable.