Title Series: A Hairy Situation
Rating: PG-13
Chapter: One
Author: White Werewolf
Category: Buffy/Xander
Spoilers/Timeframe: Season 6. Before Xander's failed marriage, and Spuffy is happening. Willow and Tara are separated due to Willow's magic use. And Dawn almost got killed because of Willow's problem.
Summery: While on a camping trip, Xander starts to go through some changes. And, it's for the better.
Special Thanks: DBrbntKnght, Mims, and Ozmandayus
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lately it seems that my life is like that Jim Carrey movie, The Truman Show. Like people all around the world are watching me and everything I do. I know what people are thinking. I mean, I may not look it, but sometimes I can be very observant. They're expecting me to be the loser, a complete Jimmy Olsen, boy blunder, whatever you wanna call it. What was it that Cordelia called me that seem to work far too well for my own good? Oh yeah, the Zeppo, the forgotten one.
But if you were to look at me today, all those names would be false. They're in my past, long buried, though certainly not forgotten.
How are they false, you may ask?
To quote a famous song, "Just sit right down, and you'll hear a tale." This tale takes place during the year of Buffy's resurrection. Not the first one, but the second one. Here's the scenario: you flip on the television, and turn to A&E Biography. This show is about Alexander "Xander" LaVelle Harris, and it's already in progress.
I was lying in my bed staring at the ceiling. Numerous thoughts filled my brain. Among them was what really was happening in my life. I was engaged to a beautiful woman named Anya. Willow and Tara were in Splitsville. Dawn was feeling neglected, Giles had left for merry ole England, and Buffy was dealing with some heavy depression in a not very good way.
With all those issues in my head, I realized that something had to be done. Something that recalled the amazing friendships I'd had with Buffy and Willow during those golden years at Sunnydale High School.
With the friendships reestablished, I thought that all our problems would easily be solved. Well, actually, they wouldn't be easily solved, but they would be a heck of a lot closer to solved then they were now. Dawn would get her well deserved attention, Willow and Tara would maybe chill enough to get back together, Giles might think of visiting, and Buffy wouldn't be as depressed anymore. She would be the fun loving Buffy I remember from years past.
But how was I going to get the relationships restored? I needed an answer I didn't have. I glanced at my fiancée, and she was asleep. After all, it was 1 o'clock in the morning.
I got out from underneath the covers, and started to pace. I went back and forth, back and forth, trying to come to a solution. I paced for a good fifteen, twenty minutes, but nothing sprang in my brain.
Sighing, I knew that I needed to get out of the apartment. My lungs needed that silly thing called fresh air, and if they got it, maybe my brain would work again. After I slipped on a pair of blue jeans and a red t-shirt, I grabbed two stakes--I wanted to think, not die. Then I took my wallet, my cell phone, and the keys, and placed them in my pocket.
I kissed Anya on the forehead, and left the apartment.
When I got outside, the streets seemed calm, and the only lights came from the moon, stars, and lampposts that bordered the pavement. I strolled down the sidewalk with my hands in my pockets.
Could I take my friends shopping? No doubt, Buffy and Willow would enjoy that, but I wouldn't. I hate cloth shopping. So, scratch that. Take the girls to Disneyland? That would seem too well planned out. There would be a lot of phone calling, and money issues. I didn't have near enough money for that. After all, I had a wedding to plan and pay for being as there hadn't been a convenient Father of the Bride to pay for things for several centuries.
What could I do? As the minutes passed, it seemed that I wouldn't find an answer.
I was fed up. It'd been a good hour, and I hadn't come up with anything. I entered a nearby ally, and I needed to vent my frustration, so I kicked the nearest trashcan, all the while muttering.
"Damn it. What the hell is wrong with me? My dad is right. I'm too stupid to come up with anything."
Then I kicked the can again, and again.
Sometime in the middle of releasing my anger, I fell on my ass, and it hurt. It really hurt. I rubbed it to lessen the pain, then I looked up into the sky. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Well, actually if it was a ton of bricks my skull would be smashed open, and I would be the main coarse for a zombie, but metaphorically speaking, I did came up with an idea, and the idea was camping.
We never did go camping before, and it would be something different. We could relate back to nature like the Indians, no Native Americans. You know, before they started running casinos and giving me vengeful syphilis.
My spirits suddenly lifted, and I wanted to tell someone about it. But who? Anya, Willow, and Dawn would be asleep. Buffy on the other hand would be wide-awake. After all, she is the Slayer. I headed for the cemeteries.
Within twenty minuets, I reached Restful Cemetery and grabbing hold of the top of the fence, I swung myself over. Successfully landed on my feet. And that was Xander Harris who made that jump, my mental sports caster drawled, eat your heart out…uh…uh….who's a famous pole-vaulter? I don't know.
Oh well. Moving on, I searched the cemetery looking for Buffy. I wanted to tell her, and see her face light up. I would love to see that in her face again. Maybe this idea could do that. I'll be honest; I was excited.
But all of a sudden, a vampire jumped out from behind a gravestone. Eyes glaring hatefully at me, he had the gall to tell me, "You shouldn't be out this late at night, boy."
Fear entered my brain, and it swam all over till it reached my toes. I gritted my teeth, and said with all the bravery in my voice,
"Come get some."
"With pleasure," the vampire replied with a grin. Then he rounded up his arm, and punched me in the jaw. It looked like those cartoons where Popeye ate his spinach, rounded up his arm, and let it loose on Pluto. It ended up backwards though. I was Pluto, and the vampire was Popeye.
But I was the underdog, so I should have been Popeye. I grabbed my stake, and said, "Get over here!" I got him right in the heart.
"This sucks!" was his parting retort, not a particularly imaginative or unique death-cry for vampires. I'd heard it before. Then he was dust, and I pulled the stake out from the falling bits.
I'd dusted myself off when two more vampires came out of the darkness.
One of them yelled, "You killed Kenny!"
I couldn't resist, so I returned, "You bastard!"
Then that vampire and his partner advanced toward me with vengeance in their eyes. The first one grabbed me by the arm and threw me. I soared through the air with the greatest of ease and hit my head on the gravestone. Wee.
My head was throbbing, but the vampire was coming to finish me off. So, I shook my head to regain control, and sprang to my feet with my stake in my right hand. I was about to jam it into his heart, when I saw something point out of his chest,
"Bummer," he said.
I looked at my savior, and smiled when I saw Buffy behind the stake. The vampire became dust, and settled to the ground. Buffy's foot swept the last vampire onto his behind, and she straddled his fallen body.
"Slayer," the vamp said, "we meet at last."
The blond pulled her stake into his view and said, "It's not nice to meet you," then she shoved it into his chest, thus disintegrating the undead attacker.
Buffy got up and walked over to me, offering her hand.
"You okay, Xander?"
All I could do was take it, stand up, and nod.
"Why aren't you at your apartment?"
"I couldn't sleep." Then I smiled at her, "And I needed to talk to someone, and knew you were up. So, I came searching for you."
Buffy sighed, "What do you want to tell me, Xan?"
I draped his arm around her shoulders and said, "I got the answer to all our problems."
She withdrew herself out of my arm, and sighed. She's been doing that a lot lately.
"What pray tell do you have to tell me?"
"You, me, and Willow should go away for a weekend. You know get away from the Hellmouth." I told her with my trademark lopsided grin, hoping it would win her over.
"I can't leave Sunnydale, Xander. I got a responsibility to this town."
"Listen, Buffy. You're running yourself ragged slaying every night. It's only three days. Don't tell me that you can't stay away for three days."
She sighed again. "I can't stay away for three days."
"I told you not to say that again," I repeated.
The blond shrugged her shoulders, "Sorry."
"S'okay." It's now or never, Xander. I paused, then said, "You can miss three days. Tara can watch Dawn."
"Its just not Dawn, Xander. Who's going to watch Sunnydale?"
"How 'bout Spike?" I ventured.
My blond friend shuddered when I mentioned his name.
"Definitely not Spike."
Buffy's shuddering gave me the heabie jeebies. Normally, when Buffy hears the name Spike, she doesn't respond with anything. She stays the same as before…but this time she was spooked. It scared the living sh**t out of me. What? I can't use swear words all the time. I don't know who's reading this.
I needed to ask her. "What's the problem, Buff?"
She directed her eyes to the ground, and said softly, "It's nothing."
I definitely knew something was up. But, I didn't want to pry. Not at this moment anyway. The camping could loosen her up, so, I suggested, "We can call Angel." Woah! I never thought I would say that. "I'm sure he can spare three days and return to LA after."
The name Angel calmed her down. I thought it'd do that. "Will that do?"
She nodded.
"I'll call him when we get back to the house. But where do you want us to go?"
I flashed my lopsided grin again, and said, "Camping."
Buffy looked even more confused. "Camping?"
I nodded this time. "Yeah. We never did it before, and Willow, you, and I need to mend the friendships we had."
"And when do you want us to go camping?"
"With Monday being Martin Luther King Day, we can leave Saturday, and spend three days. We'll tell Willow tomorrow, and pack."
The blond smiled. It was a weak smile, but still a smile nevertheless. Progress…so that made me happy.
"I guess we can do that. I'll call Angel tonight."
I reached into my jean pocket, and pulled out my cell phone. Then I gave it to Buffy and said, "Call him now."
I wasn't giving her any opportunity to forget.
Buffy took the phone from my hand, and opened it up. She dialed the number, and placed it to her ear. "Hi Cordelia. I need to speak to Angel."
TBC
Rating: PG-13
Chapter: One
Author: White Werewolf
Category: Buffy/Xander
Spoilers/Timeframe: Season 6. Before Xander's failed marriage, and Spuffy is happening. Willow and Tara are separated due to Willow's magic use. And Dawn almost got killed because of Willow's problem.
Summery: While on a camping trip, Xander starts to go through some changes. And, it's for the better.
Special Thanks: DBrbntKnght, Mims, and Ozmandayus
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lately it seems that my life is like that Jim Carrey movie, The Truman Show. Like people all around the world are watching me and everything I do. I know what people are thinking. I mean, I may not look it, but sometimes I can be very observant. They're expecting me to be the loser, a complete Jimmy Olsen, boy blunder, whatever you wanna call it. What was it that Cordelia called me that seem to work far too well for my own good? Oh yeah, the Zeppo, the forgotten one.
But if you were to look at me today, all those names would be false. They're in my past, long buried, though certainly not forgotten.
How are they false, you may ask?
To quote a famous song, "Just sit right down, and you'll hear a tale." This tale takes place during the year of Buffy's resurrection. Not the first one, but the second one. Here's the scenario: you flip on the television, and turn to A&E Biography. This show is about Alexander "Xander" LaVelle Harris, and it's already in progress.
I was lying in my bed staring at the ceiling. Numerous thoughts filled my brain. Among them was what really was happening in my life. I was engaged to a beautiful woman named Anya. Willow and Tara were in Splitsville. Dawn was feeling neglected, Giles had left for merry ole England, and Buffy was dealing with some heavy depression in a not very good way.
With all those issues in my head, I realized that something had to be done. Something that recalled the amazing friendships I'd had with Buffy and Willow during those golden years at Sunnydale High School.
With the friendships reestablished, I thought that all our problems would easily be solved. Well, actually, they wouldn't be easily solved, but they would be a heck of a lot closer to solved then they were now. Dawn would get her well deserved attention, Willow and Tara would maybe chill enough to get back together, Giles might think of visiting, and Buffy wouldn't be as depressed anymore. She would be the fun loving Buffy I remember from years past.
But how was I going to get the relationships restored? I needed an answer I didn't have. I glanced at my fiancée, and she was asleep. After all, it was 1 o'clock in the morning.
I got out from underneath the covers, and started to pace. I went back and forth, back and forth, trying to come to a solution. I paced for a good fifteen, twenty minutes, but nothing sprang in my brain.
Sighing, I knew that I needed to get out of the apartment. My lungs needed that silly thing called fresh air, and if they got it, maybe my brain would work again. After I slipped on a pair of blue jeans and a red t-shirt, I grabbed two stakes--I wanted to think, not die. Then I took my wallet, my cell phone, and the keys, and placed them in my pocket.
I kissed Anya on the forehead, and left the apartment.
When I got outside, the streets seemed calm, and the only lights came from the moon, stars, and lampposts that bordered the pavement. I strolled down the sidewalk with my hands in my pockets.
Could I take my friends shopping? No doubt, Buffy and Willow would enjoy that, but I wouldn't. I hate cloth shopping. So, scratch that. Take the girls to Disneyland? That would seem too well planned out. There would be a lot of phone calling, and money issues. I didn't have near enough money for that. After all, I had a wedding to plan and pay for being as there hadn't been a convenient Father of the Bride to pay for things for several centuries.
What could I do? As the minutes passed, it seemed that I wouldn't find an answer.
I was fed up. It'd been a good hour, and I hadn't come up with anything. I entered a nearby ally, and I needed to vent my frustration, so I kicked the nearest trashcan, all the while muttering.
"Damn it. What the hell is wrong with me? My dad is right. I'm too stupid to come up with anything."
Then I kicked the can again, and again.
Sometime in the middle of releasing my anger, I fell on my ass, and it hurt. It really hurt. I rubbed it to lessen the pain, then I looked up into the sky. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Well, actually if it was a ton of bricks my skull would be smashed open, and I would be the main coarse for a zombie, but metaphorically speaking, I did came up with an idea, and the idea was camping.
We never did go camping before, and it would be something different. We could relate back to nature like the Indians, no Native Americans. You know, before they started running casinos and giving me vengeful syphilis.
My spirits suddenly lifted, and I wanted to tell someone about it. But who? Anya, Willow, and Dawn would be asleep. Buffy on the other hand would be wide-awake. After all, she is the Slayer. I headed for the cemeteries.
Within twenty minuets, I reached Restful Cemetery and grabbing hold of the top of the fence, I swung myself over. Successfully landed on my feet. And that was Xander Harris who made that jump, my mental sports caster drawled, eat your heart out…uh…uh….who's a famous pole-vaulter? I don't know.
Oh well. Moving on, I searched the cemetery looking for Buffy. I wanted to tell her, and see her face light up. I would love to see that in her face again. Maybe this idea could do that. I'll be honest; I was excited.
But all of a sudden, a vampire jumped out from behind a gravestone. Eyes glaring hatefully at me, he had the gall to tell me, "You shouldn't be out this late at night, boy."
Fear entered my brain, and it swam all over till it reached my toes. I gritted my teeth, and said with all the bravery in my voice,
"Come get some."
"With pleasure," the vampire replied with a grin. Then he rounded up his arm, and punched me in the jaw. It looked like those cartoons where Popeye ate his spinach, rounded up his arm, and let it loose on Pluto. It ended up backwards though. I was Pluto, and the vampire was Popeye.
But I was the underdog, so I should have been Popeye. I grabbed my stake, and said, "Get over here!" I got him right in the heart.
"This sucks!" was his parting retort, not a particularly imaginative or unique death-cry for vampires. I'd heard it before. Then he was dust, and I pulled the stake out from the falling bits.
I'd dusted myself off when two more vampires came out of the darkness.
One of them yelled, "You killed Kenny!"
I couldn't resist, so I returned, "You bastard!"
Then that vampire and his partner advanced toward me with vengeance in their eyes. The first one grabbed me by the arm and threw me. I soared through the air with the greatest of ease and hit my head on the gravestone. Wee.
My head was throbbing, but the vampire was coming to finish me off. So, I shook my head to regain control, and sprang to my feet with my stake in my right hand. I was about to jam it into his heart, when I saw something point out of his chest,
"Bummer," he said.
I looked at my savior, and smiled when I saw Buffy behind the stake. The vampire became dust, and settled to the ground. Buffy's foot swept the last vampire onto his behind, and she straddled his fallen body.
"Slayer," the vamp said, "we meet at last."
The blond pulled her stake into his view and said, "It's not nice to meet you," then she shoved it into his chest, thus disintegrating the undead attacker.
Buffy got up and walked over to me, offering her hand.
"You okay, Xander?"
All I could do was take it, stand up, and nod.
"Why aren't you at your apartment?"
"I couldn't sleep." Then I smiled at her, "And I needed to talk to someone, and knew you were up. So, I came searching for you."
Buffy sighed, "What do you want to tell me, Xan?"
I draped his arm around her shoulders and said, "I got the answer to all our problems."
She withdrew herself out of my arm, and sighed. She's been doing that a lot lately.
"What pray tell do you have to tell me?"
"You, me, and Willow should go away for a weekend. You know get away from the Hellmouth." I told her with my trademark lopsided grin, hoping it would win her over.
"I can't leave Sunnydale, Xander. I got a responsibility to this town."
"Listen, Buffy. You're running yourself ragged slaying every night. It's only three days. Don't tell me that you can't stay away for three days."
She sighed again. "I can't stay away for three days."
"I told you not to say that again," I repeated.
The blond shrugged her shoulders, "Sorry."
"S'okay." It's now or never, Xander. I paused, then said, "You can miss three days. Tara can watch Dawn."
"Its just not Dawn, Xander. Who's going to watch Sunnydale?"
"How 'bout Spike?" I ventured.
My blond friend shuddered when I mentioned his name.
"Definitely not Spike."
Buffy's shuddering gave me the heabie jeebies. Normally, when Buffy hears the name Spike, she doesn't respond with anything. She stays the same as before…but this time she was spooked. It scared the living sh**t out of me. What? I can't use swear words all the time. I don't know who's reading this.
I needed to ask her. "What's the problem, Buff?"
She directed her eyes to the ground, and said softly, "It's nothing."
I definitely knew something was up. But, I didn't want to pry. Not at this moment anyway. The camping could loosen her up, so, I suggested, "We can call Angel." Woah! I never thought I would say that. "I'm sure he can spare three days and return to LA after."
The name Angel calmed her down. I thought it'd do that. "Will that do?"
She nodded.
"I'll call him when we get back to the house. But where do you want us to go?"
I flashed my lopsided grin again, and said, "Camping."
Buffy looked even more confused. "Camping?"
I nodded this time. "Yeah. We never did it before, and Willow, you, and I need to mend the friendships we had."
"And when do you want us to go camping?"
"With Monday being Martin Luther King Day, we can leave Saturday, and spend three days. We'll tell Willow tomorrow, and pack."
The blond smiled. It was a weak smile, but still a smile nevertheless. Progress…so that made me happy.
"I guess we can do that. I'll call Angel tonight."
I reached into my jean pocket, and pulled out my cell phone. Then I gave it to Buffy and said, "Call him now."
I wasn't giving her any opportunity to forget.
Buffy took the phone from my hand, and opened it up. She dialed the number, and placed it to her ear. "Hi Cordelia. I need to speak to Angel."
TBC