Author's response:

Keep reading.

For, in celebration of the 244th anniversary of American Independence, I, an American Independent, have penned a chapter about an American subject.

Being Crazy in Paradise

"Ideological subversion."

As she readjusted her head set, Matsu had to admit, for all her knowledge, that was not a phrase she was familiar with.

"Something to do with the Cold War, I think. He said it started 70 years ago."

Matsu rubbed her eyes as they pulsated in her skull, begging for sleep. "I'll look into it. Anything else?"

Silence, then, "Nothing I'd trust over the phone."

"Okay. I'll come see you tomorrow."

"Thanks."

"And, Homura?"

"Yeah?"

Matsu took in a breath, unsure of what she was about to say. "We'll get him next time."

Silence again. "We'd better."

Sighing, Matsu cut the connection. What a night he'd had so far. When she'd lost track of his signal in the hospital, Matsu had feared the worst. Her attempt to gain access to the network proved that the hospital wasn't a dead zone, yet Homura's signal had popped up again soon after.

Poor Homura had staggered his way into checking himself in, forced to put his trust in Minaka's doctors after all he'd endured. That must've hurt as much as the injuries he'd received. Worse still, Hametsu had been out in the open, on a cloudless night, yet none of the MBI spy satellites had been in position to get a look at him.

The first thing Matsu decided to do was tip off the Russian and South Korean governments to the giant death lasers hovering over their countries. She was somewhat disappointed that North Korea hadn't been threatened, if only to force Minaka to parley with another despot with a god complex.

Nothing quite beat the taste of his own medicine.

The second thing to do was to run a search on "ideological subversion". From a glance at the results, a common motif repeated: the name "Bezmenov", first name Yuri. So, rather than sift through the various articles about him, Matsu went looking for the source.

What she found made her sick to her stomach.

Covert demoralization, the weakening and overthrow of a military superpower, the destruction of an entire generation's ability to discern reality, these were heavy, heavy subjects that Mr. Bezmenov broached.

What truly made her nauseous, however, was the mental connection forming between a 36-year-old interview and her 19-year-old Ashikabi.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Minato felt unpleasantly unsquashed that morning. His arms were restrained but hardly immobilized, as he only felt three pairs of feminine funbags instead of the usual four. Come to think of it, he only had three girls on him right then, a sensation he hadn't woken up to since winging Tsukiumi.

The sun peeked in through the blinds. He turned to see Tsukiumi curled up on his left, wearing that sexy black nightgown he loved oh so much. Her wavy blonde hair was spilled across her side of the mat, some of it concealing her cheek and mouth. He wanted to reach up and brush it away, but her big, pert breasts sandwiched his arm, reminding him of his developing muscle as they contorted around his rippling meat. His hand rested on the crease of her hip and smooth thigh. All he would have to do is turn his hand out and she'd be hooked. He actually thought about doing it, but Tsukiumi wasn't the type of woman to wake up to thar. Not to mention, if he had to tease her, he'd rather it end with her on top of him, screaming his name. He knew Tsukiumi would prefer that, too.

On his right was Musubi, wearing that form-fitting T-shirt and red trunks, resting her head on his developing shoulder muscle. It only just occurred to him that when she wasn't in her gi, Musubi basically spent the day working out in her pajamas. Not that he minded: something about the way she smelled enticed him, like a rough-and-tumble perfume peppering her pleasant Sekirei scent. Her breath tickled his face, coming from between those cute kissable lips, framed by her lopsided miko haircut. He just wanted to cuddle her so bad, and then he wanted to tear her clothes off and spank her until his hand marked permanent ownership of her bubble-shaped butt. Feeling it now, as his fingers sank into the curvature of her soft but firm posterior, the only thing more squeezable was attached to her chest.

The best pair of breasts sat atop his stomach, though, as Kazehana had apparently fallen asleep without doing her magic trick for sliding beneath him. Until now, he'd assumed it was instinct, given that she always wanted to be under him anyway, but feeling her lithe curves press on his body (all of it) was certainly sexy in its own right. He just wished she'd chosen to straddle his waist instead of his kneecaps. Curious, though, that she'd worn her purple dress to bed.

His stirring brought Musubi around first. Her big brown eyes fluttered open and beheld his own.

"Moooorning," she softly sang. Scooting up a little, she gave Minato a chaste kiss on the lips. That wasn't good enough for him, so his hand came up her back and pushed her head into a full-on tongue-tying snog. Ah, that was better, seeing her hot pink wings bloom from her crest. Not for long, though, as he closed his eyes and continued to suck face.

Not long after, he heard a growl from his other side. A soft, otherwise delicate hand sank a vice grip around his arm.

"Minato," came an angry hiss. He didn't look, as he was still happily kissing Musubi. "Pray tell, why doth the first thing I see happen to be my husband- Ah!"

When in doubt, deploy fish hooks.

Tsukiumi folded, curling her body around his hand but making no attempt to stop him.

"Mina-!" She was cut off by a sharp but quiet gasp. "Husband! That's filthy!"

Now Minato broke from Musubi, sliding his hand back down to grope her luscious bubble butt. He turned his head to behold Tsukiumi, who had her mouth latched onto his shoulder to keep from crying out. Her moans and whines were turning him on so badly. He wasn't one for having morning wood, but a sexy blonde squirming at his touch was certainly a way to get it.

"Tsukiumi," he whispered, while relishing Musubi's happy mewls in his ear, "how about a kiss?"

He stopped just long enough for Tsukiumi to couple her lips to his. Then, he revved it back up.

The reaction was instant. Tsukiumi's eyes screwed shut and a broken, guttural squeal of exertion left her throat. Oh, she tried to stop herself, tried to keep her legs clenched so as not to flood the bed, but if Minato had learned anything that day on the pier, it was Tsukiumi's extreme sensitivity to touch.

Credit to her, she kept it in her panties. Barely a graze of wetness clung to Minato's withdrawing fingers. He couldn't embrace her due to his arm being on the wrong side, but her free hands were more than happy to cling to him.

After a minute, during which Musubi laced her feet around his right calf, Minato broke from Tsukiumi and just lay there, staring into her ocean-blue eyes.

"You know what I love about you, Tsukiumi?" he said.

Tsukiumi shifted and lay her head on his shoulder. "Limit thyself not to one."

He chuckled at that. "It's how you flip from one extreme to the other. I love that."

"I am not a hard woman to please," she said, smiling. "I simply shan't tolerate neglect."

"Oh, trust me, I know," he said, before his fingers began making mischief again. Musubi pawed at him, no longer content to simply be groped, so he turned and kissed her in full view of Tsukiumi.

Tsukiumi reflexively tried to growl but due the song that was playing inside of her, all that came out was sort of a hrmp!

"Do you know what 'heat' is, Tsukiumi?" he whispered, breaking from Musubi again. "In pro wrestling, I mean."

"I…" Tsukiumi was starting to curl again.

"Oooo," Musubi cooed, thrusting her tush into his palm. "I think I do."

"Don't tell Tsukiumi," he whispered playfully. "I don't want her to know she was figured out by a, what did she say, 'loudmouth simian peacock'."

Tsukiumi's eyes shot open in horror, before her look and her budding shout of protest dissolved into a low, sensual moan. That look alone was worth anything Miya might do if she caught them.

Stopping his ministrations as he heard an unknown fourth occupant stir, Minato quickly kissed both girls on the lips. "Love you. Love you both so much."

Said occupant turned out to be... Ku.

Oh shit.

Minato bit back the curse. In his half-aware state, he'd completely forgotten about Miya's condition for the girls sleeping with him. Now Ku was sitting up in her green pajamas, rubbing her eyes before crawling over Tsukiumi.

"I want a good morning kiss, too!" she demanded, pretty loudly for someone who just woke up.

A sinking feeling dropped Minato's gut. Just how much had Ku heard?

"Big brother loves me, too, right?!" Ku whined.

Control returned to Minato's situation as Kazehana began to stir. Freeing his arms from Musubi and Tsukiumi, his torso came up with his brow.

"Do I hear a 'please'?" he said with a dash of disapproval.

"Tsukiumi and Musubi didn't say please!" said Ku, standing up and folding her arms. "Just now!"

"We were courteous, brat," Tsukiumi hissed at the girl. "Diplomacy would serve thee well."

"Let's be nice to each other," Musubi said, looking at Tsukiumi while climbing to her feet. As she stepped over the pile, Minato's eyes followed her spherical ass. It oscillated in her skin-tight trunks, so form-fitting that she might as well have not bothered. If not for Ku, that is.

The brunette dropped to her knees and hugged Ku to her chest. The little girl's stink-face remained firmly set even as she sank into Musubu's covered cleavage, arms folded indignantly. It was so adorable that Minato almost laughed, but that would've made things worse.

"See?" Musubi said, pointing to the crack in Minato's facial edifice. "It's not hard to make Minato want to kiss you. Just smile and be happy!"

Ku's eyes wandered up to Musubi, then back down to Minato, then to Tsukiumi, then Minato again.

Stink-face still very much intact, she grumbled, "Can Ku have a kiss, Big Brother?"

That did it. Minato cracked up and laughed, even harder when lightning started flying between Tsukiumi and Ku. Scooting his way from under Kazehana, who he noticed was covering her ears, Minato rolled to his knees. He kept laughing as he drew up to Ku, and took her little face between his hands.

Buddha, God, anyone who's listening, forgive me, he thought as he closed his eyes.

He blanked on the kiss, which was good, since he really didn't want to enjoy this until Ku was old enough to understand… certain things. Musubi must've sensed his unease, because she quickly lifted Ku away and sat her in her arms.

"See?" she said, smiling at Ku, who just now opened her eyes.

And boy, it was like someone threw a switch. Ku's sour mood was gone without a trace, replaced by a thousand-watt smile to rival Musubi's.

"M-hm, m-hm!" Ku nodded, then kissed Musubi on the cheek. "Thanks, Musubi, and Big Brother, too!"

Now the two's stomachs began to growl, so Musubi brought Ku back to her room to change. Tsukiumi, having watched the whole thing from the floor, sat up and seized Minato with a passionate kiss. Unlike with Ku, Minato had no qualms about it.

"I'll not lose to a child," she stated, then stood. Minato said nothing, preferring his blonde wife remain inspired to chase him.

Tsukiumi nudged Kazehana's prone form with her toe.

"Awaken, thou wastrel," Tsukiumi barked. "The day grows no younger, much like thyself."

Kazehana winced, still covering her ears. "Too loud…"

Tsukiumi scoffed. "I've a mind to hang thee out with the laundry."

Tsukiumi walked off, leaving Minato to lay back down next to Kazehana. Her eyes slowly unclenched but remained shut.

"Kazehana," he whispered, "were you up late?"

The busty lady groaned. "I don't remember…"

Minato hummed, then slid a hand along her curvaceous waist. "You know, Tsukiumi's going to take a while to put on her dress."

Kazehana groaned again.

Minato put his forehead to hers and closed his eyes. "How about a special wake-up call?"

Kazehana rolled away from him. "Could you please… get me a glass of water? A really big glass of water?"

Minato frowned. He hadn't seen Kazehana hung over like this in a long time. How much sake did it take to override her bottomless horniness?

Nevertheless, he stroked her side one more time before getting up to oblige. A flicker in the back of his mind told him that Kazehana only drank like this when something was bothering her, something she wanted to avoid. Tidbits of knowledge rose unbidden, forming a pattern on the tapestry of his mind. She'd always liked sake, but only started heavily drinking after Minaka dumped her. She'd gotten wasted after she'd run into him, her soon-to-be Ashikabi when those old stirrings of heartbreak resurfaced. Upon discovering her best friend Uzume was secretly the Veiled Sekirei, she'd taken her to drown their woes.

Minato halted, halfway down the stairs, still in his pajamas. When had she told him that? He couldn't remember.

Then there was the First Match. Much as he'd wanted to take her with him, she'd been far too passed out that morning to be roused. He remembered the stink of alcohol on her breath.

Come to think of it, as he reached the kitchen and grabbed himself a cup, the only times he remembered her coping without alcohol…

He blushed. That night before the escape, when she'd made a man out of him. Oh, and the morning after Hametsu jumped them outside the club.

"Whoops!" He'd lost track of the cup's capacity, and now his hand was all wet.

So, he thought as he headed back upstairs, she's feeling down about something but doesn't want to talk about it. Something that happened last night… No, yesterday. She was getting wasted as soon as we all came back. She doesn't want to talk about it, not to me, anyway…

Re-entering his room, he saw her twitch as he slid the door open. Had he startled her?

"Hey," he said softly, "thirsty?"

She gave a half-hearted chuckle, rolling over to sit up and take the glass. Immediately his eyes darted to her cleavage, her enormous breasts flopping and swaying with her shifting position. He just wanted to shove his face between them and suffocate himself in fluffy female fertility. Instead, he started with a little feel.

She frowned as she drank, then pushed his hand away when she finished.

Now it was Minato's turn to frown. "Kazehana?"

"I'm just… not in the mood right now."

Sirens screamed in Minato's head. Since when had she ever, in the entirety of their time together, "not been in the mood"? The last time she wasn't in the mood, it was only because he'd kissed and groped and ploughed the urge out of her.

She was always horny. True, Matsu was easily the most perverted out of all his Sekirei. Her mind practically lived in the gutter, and Minato dared not imagine how much storage space in those computers was dedicated to "research material". Kazehana, though, was the most proactive, always seeming to make plans or seize moments that could lead inside his pants. He remembered the naked apron stunt she'd pulled to jump his bones in the middle of the hallway, or how she'd taught him cunning linguistics while Miya was out, or when she'd tackled him from the roof after he came home from a match. He couldn't be bothered to remember which match it was, just the super erotic welcome he'd gotten upon returning.

Kazehana, from his experience, was a woman of many emotional states. The one common thread through all of them was that her entire spectrum, since emerging, be it directly or indirectly, revolved around wanting his attention.

"Talk to me," he commanded, firmly grasping her shoulders. "Right now. I'm all ears."

"There's nothing to talk about," she insisted, shaking him loose. "I just… The last few days have been a roller coaster, all right? All this up and down, it's a lot to handle."

Bullshit, though he didn't say it. This was a woman who'd handled killing a helicopter squadron's worth of people just fine. No extra-dimensional terror roller coaster had rattled her, at least directly, and Minato didn't think it was about to. But her heart? She'd set it herself: her tender maiden's heart was as fragile as a tea cup. Right now, though he was absolutely livid to admit it, he was not the person to fix it.

So he stood, grabbed some clothes from his folded laundry stacks, and approached the door.

"I'll grab you a fresh dress," he said, before shutting it behind him. He didn't want to ask her to leave, but he still needed to get changed. So, he'd change in her room.

He heard feet. He turned and saw feet, peeking out from under a creased pink dress.

"Morning, Matsu," Minato said with a yawn, rubbing his eyes as he stepped away from his room. A twinge of anxiety pricked the back of his brain. He didn't know why, but he sensed it wasn't his own.

"Mh," was all the sound she made, barely an acknowledgement.

"You sleep okay?" he asked, even though her bloodshot eyes gave away the answer.

"I stayed up late," she replied, before passing him by and shuffling down the stairs.

"Find anything on Hametsu, Matsu?"

Her silence spoke volumes. Frowning, Minato opened the door to Kazehana's room, which he'd forgotten was already occupied.

"Oh, hi Minato!" chirped a half-naked Musubi standing next to a pajama-clad Ku (thank heavens). Her turn to him swung her delicious-looking melons around like sandbags on a street sign, and her trunks offered no movement to compete for his eyes. "You're here to help me change?"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Finding a dress for Kazehana took longer than he'd expected. Musubi and Ku, who seemed to be much brighter than yesterday, insisted on playing dress-up with Musubi's wardrobe on Musubi's body. Minato complied only long enough to shoo them both from the room, only to have someone else barge in on him.

"Kazehana," he remarked upon seeing her. She looked at him, leaning on the door as it slid open, one arm lazily drooping at her side. Closing her eyes, her arm came up with a bottle of sake in hand.

"Hey." He covered the top with his hand. "What's going on?"

"What's going on," said Kazehana, shaking his hand off, "is that I'm hydrated, I feel better, and I want a drink."

To whit, she put the bottle to her lips and chugged, before her eyes widened and she started hacking and sputtering.

"Easy," said Minato. "Don't choke on my account."

"I'll choke on whatever I want," she coughed, before shouldering past him, shoving him out of the room, and closing the door.

Minato listened a while longer as his raven-haired wife emptied the bottle down her throat. It clattered to the floor, followed by a soft body dropping on something softer.

He caught Tsukiumi's arm as she emerged from her room.

"Husband, now is hardly the time or place," she remarked, then smiled. "What dost thou wish of me?"

Minato glanced at Kazehana's room, then led Tsukiumi to the top of the stairs.

"When you can," he said quietly, "talk to Kazehana. I think she's in a bad way, but she won't tell me about it."

Tsukiumi didn't look convinced. "Why dost thou believe the gates of her mind would accomodate me?"

"Because just like her, you don't take no for an answer unless it comes from me or the Landlady."

Tsukiumi sighed. "I shall make the attempt. However, do not anticipate my success."

Minato nodded. "Don't worry, I plan on asking the others, too."

A vein bulged on Tsukiumi's forehead, and her fist began to shake at her side. "Thou couldst. Pretend. To disagree."

"But I know you so well," Minato chuckled as he wrapped his arms around her. Kissing the corner of her tight, trembling pout, he added, "You're so cute when you're annoyed."

Still incensed, Tsukiumi nevertheless turned her head into a more frontal peck on the lips. "I'll punish thee later for this."

"Very frightening, kotei-sama," Minato teased, then kissed her for real. When her wings faded, he said, "Just make sure you mean it."

"By my power, thou shalt be made a hobbling cripple."

Minato ignored the threat and tailed her downstairs, watching her dress sway by the power of her curvy hips. Only when he reached the dining table did he realize what she meant. Quickly he took a seat before his arousal could show, the fantasy already blooming to life with full, auditory clarity.

Matsu averted eye contact, instead scrutinizing the table. Minato saw no teasing smirk, no bait to lure him into opening a coded sext message, so what gave? If she hadn't found anything on Hametsu last night, she'd be frustrated to the point of words.

Minato was about to ask when he felt a tug on his sleeve. Ku was now beside him, a wooden breakfast platter having magically appeared in the middle of the table. Musubi followed after, sitting next to Ku with an even larger platter in her hands.

"...Big Brother?" Ku asked tentatively. "Are you mad at me?"

Minato gave her Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's signature eyebrow. "Do I look mad to you?"

"... Nnnnno?"

"Then why would you think I am?"

"Yeah, Ku," Musubi said, taking her shoulders in hand. "Minato doesn't hide his anger. Remember Tsukiumi and Kazehana?"

Kusano's lip began to quibble. "B-, but, they were bad. I was bad, too."

"You weren't bad, Ku," Minato assured her. "Kagedansu's to blame for what happened, not you."

Ku and Musubi had a joint rebuttal. "No he's not!"

"That was Hametsu making him do all those things!" Ku insisted.

"I know," Minato said, surprising them both with a friendly hair-ruffle. "I was making sure you know who our real enemy is."

Now, Matsu spoke. "Kagedansu isn't?"

"No, he's not!"

Minato turned to her. "He's a puppet. If we cut his strings, he'll stop being against us."

Matsu sighed. "I wish…"

Tsukiumi glared at her but said nothing.

Minato ignored the red head. "So, yeah," he said to Ku, "nothing to worry about."

Ku mournfully shook her head. "But… I was bad. I screamed and cried and made you upset with me."

"Oh, that?" Minato said. What do I tell her? I'm not mad, but… I mean, I was, but I don't want Ku to think she can just do that.

"You were under a lot of stress, Ku," Musubi said, mercifully throwing him a line. "You're not used to dealing with it, and that's understandable. You're still growing. You'll find better ways to deal with it as you get older."

"Oh," said Ku. "Big brother, is Musubi right?"

"She sure is," he replied, ruffling her blonde hair again.

"So, it's like the baby frogs and the water slide?"

Minato, and everyone else at the table, stopped and blinked at her.

"What?"

"Oh, no…"

"What doth she…?

"Oh my gosh, we have a water slide now?!"

Musubi got everyone's attention with that one. Ku soon got it back.

"Don't you all know where babies come from?" she asked.

Matsu groaned. "He didn't…"

"Kagedansu could tell you," Ku said. "He said babies happen when little white tadpoles reach a mommy's tummy and start building the baby. The mommy's in charge of feeding it, and the tadpoles make it grow. While they do that, they also build a water slide, so when the baby is ready it can slide out of the mommy's tummy easier, since it's so much bigger than they are."

Minato's gut was tied into a knot. "Did he say how the tadpoles get there?"

"He said the daddy goes with the mommy and dumps-"

One could almost hear the sound of three rectums clenching.

"-a huge swarm of white tadpoles-"

Clenching hard.

"-into a river."

Aaaand the tension was gone, thank goodness.

"The tadpoles swim up the river, but because babies can't swim when they're born, the tadpoles need to build the water slide to help the baby get back."

Minato would've laughed, he would've guffawed, he would've paid cash money to see this conversation happen in real time… if this were anyone else's eight-year-old ward. Instead, all he could think of was the nightmare of half-truths and metaphors he'd have to navigate

"Are you sure he said river?" Musubi asked.

"Well…" Ku thought for a moment. "He said 'channel,' but like a river, not a television."

"Oh, that makes more sense," said Musubi.

"I asked him how the baby frogs get from the river to the mommy," Ku continued. "He said…"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"You know about body chemicals, Ku?" Kagedansu asked, beads of sweat flicking off his face as his head bobbed to 'In The Dark' by Billy Squier. "The kind that make you feel things."

"Like when I feel hungry?" Ku asked.

Kagedansu reached over to the side table next to him and retrieved her an Oreo.

"In a sense," he said as she nommed on the cookie. "I could go into it, but how the white swimmers get into the channel will eventually lead us to the answer, 'Because the mommy and daddy feel like it.' There's more to it than that, but you really can't understand until you start feeling like it yourself."

"Could I make a baby if I didn't feel like it?" Ku asked, hopeful.

"Probably not."

"But why?!"

Kagedansu pointed at her tummy. "Your hips are too small to hoist a baby around. Wait ten years. You'll be big enough then."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Minato breathed a sigh of relief. Maybe Kagedansu hadn't hung him out to dry after all.

Breakfast carried on as planned, with Kazehana stumbling her way down after failing to get drunk. She took a seat next to Matsu and went at the food like a machine: steady, clean, but alarmingly efficient.

Matsu, who spent the meal eying Minato and now Ku as well, spoke up when everyone was done.

"Homura's in the hospital, non-critical." She stood, and brought her dish to the sink. "We need to go see him."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Homura?"

On his bed, his head propped up on a fluffy pillow, Homura regarded the door and his lip curled in disgust. "Minato."

The Ashikabi tried not to roll his eyes. He'd been worried about Homura, but it seems he had done something again. Maybe because a hot redhead with exposed cleavage preceded him? As a man, Minato knew a sexy woman was inherently a hard act to follow.

Nevertheless, no lines had been crossed yet, so Minato simply closed the door and sat down next to him.

"I heard you got in a fight," he said. When Homura said nothing, Minato asked, "Did you win?"

Homura gestured to his bandaged and splinted state. "Do I look like I won?"

Minato held up a finger, and quoted, "'Victory is not measured in loss, it is measured in gain'."

Homura snorted. "You still trust Kagedansu?"

Now that line was starting to look bigger. "Is there a reason I shouldn't?"

Outside in the hall, the rest of Minato's Sekirei waited for their invitation. At least, that's what they'd led Minato to believe.

"So, what's this big secret you wanted to tell us about, Matsu?" Musubi asked, her back on the door.

Matsu struggled to brace a hungover Kazehana, who wasn't drunk but had managed to dehydrate herself again.

"Homura told me to check a term Hametsu used last night," she said, 'accidentally' groping Kazehana as she stood her back up. "'Ideological subversion.' Ever heard of it?"

All four of them, Ku, Musubi, Tsukiumi, and Kazehana, shook their heads, Kazehana motorboating Matsu's shoulder in the process.

Matsu took a deep breath. "Okay, how to put this…" One thing she had to do when this was over was give Musubi and Ku a better education. Mr. Bezmenov used a lot of words and concepts that Musubi and Ku wouldn't understand, so directly translating them to Japanese wouldn't work. "Ideological subversion is a process where someone is taught to think within a very narrow frame, to the point where you can show them the horrible place their thinking will take them and they won't believe it."

"Thou speakest of my condition before my wings emerged," said Tsukiumi. "'Tis of little concern."

"No, it's much worse than that," Matsu said.

Tsukiumi's brow rose at that. "Oh? Please, enlighten us, who do not have so much spare time."

"To understand, a little history," Matsu began, then sat Kazehana down on the tile floor. Well, not 'sat' so much as 'slumped.' She really seemed out of it. "Back when the Soviets were a thing, they ran anti-American campaigns via the Communist Party U.S.A. as well as many front groups in the American film industry, like the Hollywood Anti-Nazi League. Declassified Soviet papers say as much."

Musubi folded her arms. "Didn't the Americans try to catch them?"

Matsu tilted her head back and forth. "Well, they sort of did with the Un-American Activities Committee, but they also sort of didn't. Apparently, though, there was an even bigger operation, undermining American ideals through education. That operation, and the education process itself, were both called 'ideological subversion.'"

Tsukiumi looked at Ku. "Dost thou understand, Kusano?"

"I think so," she said, before pointing at herself. "Is that why you don't let me go to school, Matsu?"

Matsu chuckled. "No, no, you're safe," she said. At least I hope so.

"So," Matsu continued, "apparently what this program did was indoctrinate kids to Marxist-Leninist thought patterns, where they'd behave a certain way and only focus on certain things, completely neglecting important issues like military and economic growth in favor of distracting but non-critical issues. It made them think only the way the Soviets wanted them to think. They'd want things that sounded nice on paper, but in practice would take them to a Soviet-style government."

On the floor, Kazehana groaned.

"That's awful!" Musubi said.

"It is?" Ku asked.

Musubi nodded. "If MBI were like that, they could make it against the rules for us to tell Minato we love him."

Ku gasped. "No!"

"Indeed," said Tsukiumi, before nodding at Matsu. "The point, if thou wouldst."

"The point is Hametsu mentioned this program last night," said Matsu. "The reason it's so diabolical is that it relies on a student's trust in their teacher."

Tsukiumi's eyes narrowed. "Out with it, then."

Matsu glared back at her. "Why bother? You know it, too."

"What?" said Musubi. "That Hametsu's saying he's really Kagedansu and he's been teaching Minato bad things?"

Matsu nodded. "In a nutshell."

"Well that can't be right," Musubi said. "If he was at Maison Izumo the whole time, why wouldn't he take our crests?"

"Because then we'd know," Matsu replied. "We'd know and then he'd have to deal with five of us, not to mention Miya. He'd need to get all of us…"

Her eyes widened. "At the same time."

Whirling on her heel, Matsu whipped a phone from her cleavage and hastily dialed a number. It rang twice before a voice answered.

"Hello, Matsu. Is my son-"

"Call off the Squad."

"... Pardon?"

"I know Homura trashed the hospital last night, but you need to call the Squad back right now."

"He what?!"

"Wait, you didn't know?"

"No, I didn't know! You- Urgh, put Minato on."

"No, hold on a minute. You're supposed to be in the loop for MBI's Sekirei hospitals," Matsu said, starting to pace. "Homura got into it last night with Hametsu. Like, really got into it. Half of Floor 5 was trashed."

"Why is this the first I'm hearing about this?"

"I don't know." Matsu grinned devilishly. "Why don't you ask Minaka?"

"I plan to. Regardless of what happened, the Squad hasn't been dispatched. Benitsubasa is overseeing some renovations being done to the old Yamamoto building, Karasuba's chasing a runaway, and Haihane's a few floors down from me."

Matsu breathed a sigh of relief. "Okay. Thanks, Takami."

"Take care of my son."

Silence, followed by a dial tone.

Matsu flipped the phone shut, then caught up to a doctor as he exited a room. "Excuse me?"

The doctor, to his credit, didn't even glance at her boobs. Very professional for a guy who looked no older than 35. "Trouble, miss?"

"I just wanted to apologize for the commotion on Floor 5 last night."

The doctor's eyebrow came up. "Floor 5?"

"Yeah," Matsu sighed, looking down. "That was us."

"There was no commotion last night."

Matsu's head sprung up. "What? Really?"

He nodded. "A colleague of mine was working the 5th floor last night. She said it was slow as always."

"Oh." Now Matsu felt embarrassed, a feeling which quickly turned to confusion. "Well, um, thanks?"

An equally confused look mirrored her own. "You're welcome?"

As Matsu walked back, Minato emerged from Homura's room. His expression was unreadable. His gaze swept the hall until it found her.

He gestured to the room. "You're up, Matsu."

Nodding, Matsu entered and closed the door behind her. Why was it so quiet in here?

Homura looked far better than Kagedansu or even Minato had upon their respective hospital visits. A cold pack was taped to his forehead, in order to reduce what he'd assured her was a sizable welt. His arms were propped up in cloth supports suspended from above, but were unweighted and uncast. So, he hadn't broken anything. Between his collar and the neck brace he wore, the white of padded bandages peeked out. The bulk of his chest and abdomen suggested more bandaging lay beneath his gown.

So, Hametsu hadn't come anywhere close to killing him. This was good, but still bad. It spoke of a lack of desperation on his opponent's part, that he'd never panicked and lost control. Be he Kagedansu or Hametsu, Matsu knew both incarnations of the enemy could've punched Homura's head off his shoulders, if they were so inclined.

"So," Matsu said, leaning over Homura, "how do you feel?"

"Awful," Homura sighed, head sinking into his pillow. "Everything hurts, even the things that don't."

"Is that what was so important that you couldn't tell me over the phone?"

"No," said Homura, weakly beckoning her closer. It was a little awkward, as on the second beckon his finger poked her boob. "I think Kagedansu's gotten to more than just Minato."

Matsu frowned. "How so?" she asked hushedly.

"When we fought, he told me he used Chiho to get Uzume away from the Inn," Homura explained. "He said he cured her when Kagedansu touched her so Uzume wouldn't stick around for his move on the Jinki. Then he showed me his face."

"And?"

Homura closed his eyes. "It was Kagedansu."

Matsu, despite herself, was still taken aback. She'd been confident it was him and dead-set on proving it to Minato. Between the personal connection between them, the proximity of their appearances, the file, and not to mention the explosive traces she'd found at the site of the First Match, all signs pointed to "Hametsu" being an elaborate hoax. At the same time, she didn't want to be right. She wanted to be wrong, to find out her would-be lover's mentor was all right after all. Being so adversarial to Minato was no fun, not to mention it ensured her newfound freedom was a sexless one.

Even more shocking, Hametsu just flat out told them. Why? She almost didn't believe it, from how far Hametsu went to hide his identity.

"So that settles it, then?"

Homura shook his head. "He wants us to think he's Kagedansu, but he also doesn't. It doesn't matter. We have what we know, and what we know is Kagedansu acted against us, and that he can cure Izanagi, too."

The pieces started to fall into place. "And you think he plans on cutting a deal with Minato."

"More likely Minato will try to cut a deal with him."

Matsu put a finger to her lip. "That would fit his preferences. Hametsu likes to put himself where people need to be, then bring them in on his terms. Even Kagedansu's story fits his character, with how he used Izanagi to goad Kagedansu into staying."

Homura's eyes opened. "Then Kagedansu was planning this even before then. How far back does his plan go?"

"I don't know," said Matsu, "but I agree that we can't tell Minato. Kagedansu set himself up as a prisoner of MBI Tower. Maybe it's figurative, maybe it's literal, but it points toward him wanting us to attack the tower… in exchange for reviving Izanagi. That's his angle. That's why he didn't take our crests. He's looking to take out the Discipline Squad and needs all of us active to do it. The night of the escape plan, he had no trouble with MBI's troops but ran as soon as the Discipline Squad appeared. No Squad means he can do whatever he wants without MBI retaliating. He could simply kill Higa and the other Ashikabi with Jinki, then win the whole Plan."

"You really think he'd do something like that?" Homura asked.

"I went over his fight with Uzume. He had her back exposed but didn't go for her crest. He was fighting to hurt her, not to win."

Homura glanced at the door. "Then we should make sure no one else tells, either."

Matsu nodded. "For Minato's sake."

"Find Hametsu," Homura said, gripping her hand. "Find him and end this farce. That's the only way to save Minato."

Matsu stood from her chair and made for the door. She opened it slowly, in case anyone happened to be leaning their ear on it.

"Why am I still here?" Homura asked her.

Matsu closed the door and turned towards him. "What do you mean?"

Homura winced. "He had me. I was out for who knows how long, and he didn't take my crest. Why?"

Matsu shrugged. "The same reason he didn't take Ku's crest when they had their little sleepover. He needs you for something."

"Any idea what?" Homura asked.

Matsu put a hand to her head. Her thoughts were hazy, half-coherent, like she was looking through smudged glass. "I want to say for an attack on MBI, but something's not adding up. I can't put my finger on it."

Homura hummed. "I guess I'll work on it. Not like there's anything else to do around here."

Matsu gestured to the wall opposite his bed, where a flatscreen TV hung above a cable box. "You could watch something."

Homura shook his head. "My head's scrambled enough, thanks."

Matsu chuckled. "Whatever you say, Homura." She pulled down the bottom of her chest, flashing Homura the full view of her cleavage. Instantly his eyes lit up and his cheeks flushed.

"Can't be that scrambled," Matsu said, smiling as her dress snapped back into place. "Get that testosterone flowing, mister. Think horny thoughts. Your muscles will thank you for it."

With that, Matsu checked the door again. When it showed no extra force in its swing, she opened it fully and stepped out.

"Good talk," she said, looking at Kazehana (who was still on the floor), Musubi, and Ku. "Where's Tsukiumi?"

"Big Brother had to go to the bathroom," Ku said, pointing down the hall. "He asked if Tsukiumi could show him."

Show him what, Matsu thought, the seams on her panties?

Sighing, Matsu held up a hand. "Wait right here. I'll go get him."

Navigating the hallways was easy, thanks to the overhead signs. There were few patients on this floor, a testament to the cutting edge medicine at Minaka's disposal. Doctors and nurses walked about, some wheeling strange-looking monoliths consisting of smooth, H. R. Giger-esque patterns of joined metal. The screens looked almost out of place on these things, bolted on to the curved metal by screws inserted into hard metal corners.

Looking at the long, dome-topped design of one, Matsu's perverted mind began to wander. Someday, she wanted to try sitting on one.

She found the bathroom soon after. It was easy to tell which one was right, as she caught the fading glow of cyan light from under the door. She rapped her fist on the door, hearing the panicked hush of a woman and the chuckle of a teenage boy.

"I know you're in there, Minato," Matsu announced, leaving her irritation unmasked. "You might as well come out."

To Matsu's surprise, it was Tsukiumi who answered the door, face flush and golden hair slightly disheveled.

"As one who was isolated, surely thou knowest the value of privacy," Tsukiumi said in a weak attempt at scolding her.

"'Private' isn't the same thing as 'safe'," Matsu said.

"That's part of the fun," Minato said, appearing behind Tsukiumi. The blonde stiffened, no doubt from something Minato was doing. "At least, that's what Kazehana told me. Want to come in, Matsu?"

"No," said the two Sekirei, Tsukiumi glaring at Minato over her shoulder.

Minato shrugged. "Suit yourself." He leaned forward and kissed Tsukiumi, not enough to trigger her wings but her expression softened regardless. It was starting to dawn on Matsu just how much Minato got away with thanks to his kisses. Tsukiumi's wrath, which at times nearly drowned an enemy Sekirei-

If only, Matsu thought.

-disappeared after just a little tongue-action. It was like a sedative for Tsukiumi, and Minato knew that.

Which is why, as she led Minato and Tsukiumi back to the group, Matsu pushed him off when he tried to sneak a kiss.

"Playing hard to get, Matsu?" Minato teased. "That's not like you."

"It's not safe here," Matsu said. "We need to get going."

"In an MBI hospital?" Minato said, skeptical.

"We thought Maison Izumo was safe," Matsu said. "What if Musubi or Ku had wandered outside?"

"They're not stupid, Matsu."

"They don't need to be. All they need is a distraction."

"If this place is unsafe," Tsukiumi said accusingly, "then why dost thou abandon Homura here?"

"Because there's no place to rig him up back at the Inn."

"You mean Maison Izumo," Musubi said as they approached.

"Whatever," Matsu replied dismissively. "The point is he needs medical equipment, and we don't have the set-up at home."

"Could we ask Seo to build it like he built the secret door?" Ku suggested.

"Hey, yeah!" Minato exclaimed, before he pulled out his phone. "I should get Seo in on this, tell him to keep an eye out for Kagedansu and Hametsu."

Matsu's lips pursed. He said that like they were two different people. "Didn't Homura tell you, Minato?"

"What, about Hametsu wearing Kagedansu's face?" Minato held the phone to his ear. "Yeah, he told me. I don't buy it. Hey, Seo!... I've been fine."

That was a lie and Matsu knew it. The question was, did Minato know it?

"Just calling to let you know to keep an eye out for Kagedansu… Yeah, that's him. How'd you know?" He smiled at Musubi and Ku as they got back to Homura's door. "Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Listen, could you do me a favor and keep an eye out for him?... He took the Jinki… Well, he's not exactly himself right now."

Another lie, one Matsu knew Minato believed.

"There's another guy to watch out for, Seo. He's not a Sekirei, but he's involved. He calls himself Hametsu… Scary yellow eyes… That's all I have. He only appears as a black silhouette, and whatever clothes he wears hide his body type. He's big, though, at least as big as Kagedansu… That's what we're trying to figure out."

Minato frowned at what Seo said next. "It's not about what's safe," he said, "it's about what's fair."

And that was all Matsu needed to hear. That one turn of phrase told her that Minato would never see reason, never heed her no matter what she said, because he'd already made up his mind to do things his way. Her mind drifted back to something Kagedansu once told him.

'Safe ain't gonna get you shit in this world.'

However, for Minato's sake, she'd still try to break his programming. It was only fair.

She'd tuned out of the conversation, so the next thing she heard Minato say came after he'd hung up the phone.

"I got a text from Uzume while I was in the bathroom."

Had she been in a more cheerful mood, Matsu would've chuckled. He made it sound so innocent.

"Apparently," he said, "Izanagi gave Chiho the spare key to his apartment. They're going over to check it out, see what's up."

"Can I come?" Ku asked. "I wanna see his apartment!"

Sorry Ku," Minato told her, "but I don't know if Musubi can carry two of us at once. Ow, ow, Tsukiumi!""

"Sure I can," Musubi chirped. "I'm a fist-type, silly."

"Why," said an irate Water Sekirei, "wouldst thou requisition Musubi before me?"

"Ngh, because I have a- Seriously, Tsukiumi, cut it out!"

Tsukiumi released his hand, but did not apologize.

"I have a job for you and Ku," he said, gesturing to the slump on the floor that was Kazehana. "Get Kazehana home, hydrated, and maybe a nice hot bath."

Kazehana groaned. "I don't need any help, Minato. I can get home just fine."

"Well, you clearly need something." Taking her hands, he pulled her to her feet. "You can tell Tsukiumi and Matsu what it is while you take your bath."

"And me?" Ku asked, tugging on his shirt.

Minato stroked her blonde hair. "And you, Ku. Besides," he said, turning back to Tsukiumi, "I want to poke around that apartment a little, maybe find a clue."

He smiled at Musubi. "You'll think of hiding places I wouldn't have dreamed of, right, Musubi?"

She shrugged. "That's a lot of places. All you ever dream about is us."

Matsu raised an eyebrow at that. "How do you know?"

"I guessed it!"

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Hiii, Musubiii!"

Chiho beamed at her rescuer as she and Minato stepped off the elevator. The apartment floor was as mediocre as Minato remembered, well-kept enough to justify the modest rent Izanagi and Kagedansu paid for it. Although, Minato paid less for a nicer room.

"Hi, Chiho!" Musubi called back, running over to her. "Have you guys been here long?"

Uzume's head swayed from side to side, making her breasts jiggle. "Eh, not too long. Our hotel's a few blocks down the street."

"Hotel?" Musubi looked disappointed. "Does that mean you're not coming back to Maison Izumo?"

"We will," Uzume said as she knocked on the door. "But Chiho wants to wait a few more days."

"Why is that?" Minato asked.

"Apparently, Kagedansu moved into Uzume's room," Chiho explained, "and I'll never get any sleep if those two share a room."

"I can be quiet!" Uzume insisted.

"I can say from first-hand experience," Chiho retorted as she inserted her key, "no, you can't."

Uzume sheepishly smiled. "I can try."

At that moment, the two Sekirei stiffened. Minato heard it, too. It sounded like a crowded socialite gathering had sprung up in Kagedansu's apartment. It also sounded like one of the party-goers had a really bad sinus infection.

"Oh, baby," he said, "this stuff is great."

"It's better than great," said another man's voice. "You do enough of this stuff, and you can be able to fucking both of us."

Minato frowned. Was that garbled speech or was his English slipping?

"Jonathan," said a woman, "I want you to meet a friend of mine, Tanya."

Uzume's eyes widened and she turned the key in Chiho's hand. That door flew open so hard the knob smashed a hole in the drywall.

The next voice put it rather succinctly. "Jonathan, Jonathan! What the bloody hell's goin' on here?!"

The apartment was empty, but it sure didn't sound empty. The party noise was ambient, just like yesterday's city-wide rock concert, only here it was obviously coming from the mini speakers, duct taped to the furniture, walls, and ceiling. A larger set of speakers sat hooked up to a CD deck beyond the kitchen, sitting under a flatscreen TV opposite a small couch.

"Well, if it isn't the world-renowned Alex Rodman," sneered the sinus-infected, "the best manager money can buy."

"You've got all the friends money can buy!" snapped Mr. Rodman. "You know damn well you're supposed to be in the studio tomorreh! And here you sit with these fucking leeches all around yeh, and if you don't stop this fucking debauchery, I'm leaving you, ya got it? This little party's officially over. Get out! Everybody get out!"

Uzume was frantically looking around, the uncanny tidiness of the room standing in stark contrast to Minato's last memory of it. Gone were the smells of rotten take-out, the old pizza boxes, the dirty laundry, everything was spick and span. The kitchen garbage was empty, and no crumpled-up papers lay near it. Even the carpet looked clean, no small feat for all the things that had once been strewn on it. When had Kagedansu found time to clean a place he'd barely visited?

"Kagedansu!"

Uzume's voice drew Minato's attention to the window by the TV. It was wide open, with no screen impeding the air. Uzume was halfway out, her toned stomach leaning on the frame as she called out to the air.

"Kagedansu, come back!" she cried. "We can work through this!"

"Uzume, you'll fall!" Chiho said, rushing over and pulling at Uzume's shirt.

Minato heard a phone being dialed over the speakers. A woman's voice answered, then a pattern of soft, tentative guitar note played a haunting, depressing melody.

Mournfully, Uzume ducked back in from the seventh-story wind. "Where could he have gone?"

"A better question," Minato said, looking around for something, anything, to give him a clue, "why did he leave?"

Uzume began shifting the furniture in the TV room, maybe looking for a stash of something. Musubi rummaged through the cupboards beneath the stove, then inside the small fridge. "Nothing in here."

"What were you expecting?" Chiho asked, going through the CD rack near the TV. "A body?"

Musubi shrugged. "Maybe something to eat. I'm a little hungry."

Minato chuckled, moving to the bathroom door. "You're always hungry, Musubi."

"This is bad."

Once again, Uzume drew everyone's attention. She stood before the CD deck, having shut off the music and withdrawn the album in question: The Crimson Idol, by the band W.A.S.P.

"He must've come here to relax after setting up the broadcast yesterday," Chiho surmised. "He knew we'd come looking for him eventually."

"Then what was with the projection on MBI Tower?" Uzume asked, returning the CD to its case, then the case to its slot on the rack. "I would've kicked in the door if not for Karasuba."

"That must've been Hametsu," Minato said. "I guess tangling with us was his backup plan if you didn't take the bait."

"And now we're on Song Number 8, 'The Idol'," Uzume said forebodingly, looking out the window. "Jonathan's found the dark side of his fame and tries to reconnect with his parents. They still don't want him, and the depression sends him into a downward spiral."

Uzume hugged herself, no doubt imagining Kagedansu in her arms. "I... I don't like where these clues are going," she murmured.

"Me neither," Minato agreed. "Kagedansu knows this deal with Hametsu won't end well for him. If Hametsu told him Homura attacked Izanagi last night-"

Uzume whirled. "He WHAT?!"

"Hey, Minato, should I open it?" Musubi called from the bedroom door.

"Uzume," Minato said, turning to the other sexy brunette, "mind picking that lock?"

With a roll of her eyes, a strip of cloth slid from beneath Uzume's shirt, coiling around her hand. "I hate how you just... assume I can do that."

"Well," Minato replied with a smile, "what's a thought-controlled veil if not a skeleton key?"

That clothed hand rested on Uzume's hip. "Better idea, smart guy: how about I just slip under the door and turn the latch?"

Minato blinked. Then he felt stupid. "That works, too, I guess."

Uzume walked up and grasped the door knob. Her eyebrows furrowed in concentration as her veil slipped beneath the door and snaked up the other side. After a few seconds, the lock clicked and the knob turned.

"I am so having a talk with Kagari later," Uzume muttered as she eased the door open.

Flicking on a light inside, the group were unnerved by what they found. Kagedansu's bedroom was clean. Like the rest of the place, the trash and old food had been removed, and the carpet left in immaculate condition. There was now a side table by the bed, upon which sat a printer. Next to the printer was Kagedansu's cell phone, turned off and plugged into the wall. A slot beneath the tabletop held a small laptop computer.

"Wha-" Uzume reached out. "What is all this?"

Taped to the wall was row upon row of printed paper. Each one was riddled with black sharpie, written in English by an unknown hand, and all had a black-and-white picture of a Sekirei on it. Meticulously categorized, they were arranged in numerical order. Minato skimmed through and found no paper for Numbers 28, 43, or…

He turned to Musubi. "Hey, do you remember the number of that girl you fought, the one who was after Homura?"

"Katsuragi?" Musubi put a finger to her cheek. "Hmmm…"

"Never mind," Minato said. Her name confirmed the pattern: eliminated Sekirei were not included.

Minato pulled off the one for Musubi. "'Easily distracted, possibly bisexual, kinetic, possibly photo-elemental, blindly faithful,'" he read.

Musubi peered around his shoulder. "Yup, that's me!"

Uzume tore down the one for Kazehana, rightfully located on the top row. "'Kineto-elemental, pragmatic, alcoholic, harmless, twice-burned'. Since when is a Single Number harmless?"

"Hametsu seems to think so," Minato said. "I guess we know where he's been hiding."

Chiho shivered. "Having to live with his own captor. No wonder he spent so long at the Inn."

Uzume's eyes widened. "So… Hametsu's been here since the day I left, and the day Kagedansu moved in."

"Hey, here's one for Tsukiumi!" Musubi exclaimed, pulling one from the top row. "'Kineto-elemental, ill-tempered, classically trained, water metal integrity, fanatically devoted… Lots of big words. Why doesn't he just talk to her on the phone?"

Minato's blood flared. No one, but no one, pined for his wife. "What do you mean?" His answer was a perplexing scribbling of the phrase, SPEAK WITH AT ALL COSTS.

Chiho pulled down the one for Kujou. "'Timid, weak bond, melee type, psychologically vulnerable'. That's accurate, but…"

"How so?" Uzume asked, reading over her shoulder.

"I met with Kujou when Kagedansu came to see me," Chiho explained, then smiled fondly. "We had a nice long talk about things. She really doesn't like working for Higa."

"Maybe she could have you," Uzume suggested. "For an Ashikabi, I mean."

"No you don't 'mean'," Chiho teased, then frowned as she pulled Uzume's profile off the wall. Unlike the others, this one was practically obscured with how much sharpie was on it.

"No. 10, Uzume"

Kinetic

"Photo-elemental?" had been crossed out.

"Sociopathic" was as well, replaced by the phrase "Needfully ruthless".

Strong-willed

"Blackmailed" had been overruled.

Use Hidaka; strong bond

"Cloth: metal integrity?" was out, replaced by, "Less than metal, more than flesh". Oh, so that's what Musubi meant when she read "water metal integrity" on Tsukiumi's page.

Range/elasticity of cloth?, though the word "elasticity" was crossed out.

Lesser to No. 3

Psychologically disciplined

Easily refocused

Isolated

PERFECT

That last word was circled, as was Uzume's photograph. Interestingly, hers seemed to be the only profile with her name included. After double-checking for a profile on Katsuragi, he concluded only numbers were listed, as if Hametsu couldn't be bothered with remembering them. Only Uzume and Tsukiumi were exceptions.

"Perfect for what?" Musubi asked.

Somehow that was the most vexing question of all.