Everyone and everything familiar belongs to Janet. The mistakes are mine alone.

Although it's happening right in front of me, I still have a hard time believing it. Even being a cop, a fucking good one, too, who relies on eyewitness accounts and irrefutable evidence to solve a crime, the puzzle pieces never come together for me when it came to them. I should be standing here in his place, by her side, being the guy she looks to for everything. But whatever Manoso wants, Manoso gets. And he wanted Stephanie from the moment he saw her. I wouldn't put it past him to have wanted her more just seeing that she was supposed to be with me. It took him some time, but I was eventually reduced to being just the guy standing between them.

When I first saw Stephanie years after our bakery encounter, and subsequent broken leg incident it caused, I thought she'd be something to do to pass the time, which is the reason I didn't think Ranger's interest in her would last. And I for damn sure didn't think it'd ever amount to anything. I was wrong, and they had the last laugh at how stupid I'd been. They're here and still very much together, while I'm the one skulking around like a fucking stalker rather than the 'party' crasher I actually am.

My suit looks good even being a few years old. And the extra hours I've put in at the gym recently are paying off if the image reflected back at me in the bathroom mirror this afternoon is accurate, but Stephanie didn't glance at anything except my face after I bit the bullet and tapped on her shoulder.

I probably should've just left without letting her know I was even here, but a part of me needed her to see me, maybe to make her question if she'd made the right decision, but the polite expression that didn't go away even when she turned and saw me standing there, uninvited, was proof that my last minute decision didn't have the desired effect I'd been hoping for.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, but there was nothing in her tone to suggest she's angry about me just showing up.

If anything, that made me more sick. She doesn't even have anger about how I'd treated her left for me.

"I wanted to offer you whatever support I could," I told her.

That's the simplest version of the truth.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I know it may not have seemed like it at the time, but I really only wanted what was best for you, Cupcake."

She rolled her eyes at the old nickname, but clearly is no longer charmed or angered by it.

"There were days, months even, when I would've argued that," she admitted.

"Me, too. Our thoughts on what would make you happy obviously weren't the same. I guess I wasn't the best you could do."

Her gaze strayed across the room to the man dressed all in black. "Sorry ... but no ... you weren't."

Ranger was talking to an older woman I'd guess is somehow related to him. As if he sensed Steph's blue eyes on him, he turned. He raised a single eyebrow when he saw her talking to me. That's all the reaction my presence got. It was more than a little insulting at how unjealous he appeared. He didn't go all alpha asshole and demand I stay the hell away from her like I half-expected him to. The nutcase was just curious why I picked today to walk back into their lives. If I had an answer for that, I'd give it to them.

He cut his eyes to Stephanie and I watched her give him a small side-to-side shake of her head. That subtle movement made me want to bury my hands in her loose curls again, but her mind wasn't even remotely on me. She continued saying what I didn't need, and really didn't want, to hear.

"He's the man for me," Steph said, pointing at Ranger who'd gone back to his conversation but had adjusted his body so we'd be in his periphery. "I should've seen and admitted it from the very beginning and saved you a lot of trouble."

"You weren't any trouble, Steph."

She let out a strangled laugh and I missed hearing it so much, I couldn't stop myself from joining her. Her laugh turned into a mini-cry as various emotions came at her all at once, but it didn't last long. No doubt she was thinking Ranger would be over here beating the shit out of me in a heartbeat if he saw her visibly upset with me nearby. She wiped her eyes with the long sleeve of her distractingly fitted dress and grinned ruefully at me. That's classic Stephanie, putting up a good front even when she's hurting.

"I was a trouble magnet and single-handedly kept Rolaids in business thanks to your frequent purchases of their products."

"I shouldn't have said stuff like that to you."

"No ... you shouldn't, but I suppose in some ways it was true at the time."

"Still ..."

She tapped my arm like an indulgent parent would. "You'll know better for next time. And there will be a next time."

"You aren't going to give me dating advice, are you?"

"You probably need some, but no. That would be weird."

"My life really will never have you in it again, will it?"

Her head was shaking in the negative before her answer even came out. "No. I've never been, and will never be, one of the fawning numbers desperate for your attention. Honestly ... I feel I've had too much of it already."

"I am happy for you, Steph."

"I'm glad, but it wouldn't change anything if you weren't."

"Ouch. You really know how to hit a guy so it'll hurt."

"With my knee or my words." Her smile turned heartbreakingly sad. "I like to leave a lasting impression."

I knew we were done talking about what we used to be. "I'm sorry about your mom."

"Me, too. In the grand scheme of things, I know children are supposed to outlive their parents, but I never gave it much thought until I got the call in Miami saying she'd had a heart attack. Grandma claims it was all the worrying she did that did her in. I always assumed my father would be the first to go for no other reason than I could picture 'Helen Plum' so easily in the role of the 'grieving widow'. Grandma Mazur has been preparing herself and making every arrangement for her own funeral ever since my Grandpa Harry died, and she just had to say goodbye to the only child they had together."

She took a deep breath to compose herself. I gave her a moment to herself and looked to where Frank was talking to Valerie. Both of them are sporting red, tear-swollen eyes and still appear more than a little dazed. Stephanie will be okay, but those two will need a lot more time. I haven't seen Edna yet, but I'm betting she's behind the scenes causing someone to reach for his or her own Rolaids.

Steph glanced to where I was looking. "You won't believe it, but Grandma is going to stay at the house with my dad until they both figure out what to do with the rest of their lives."

"I can't picture how that would work ... or that house without Helen inside it. She would've enjoyed what you and Grandma Mazur planned for her today."

"I hope so. I didn't make her happy very often in life ... but maybe she's looking down at us and can say that I managed to accomplish the impossible now."

"Steph ..."

She put her hand up in a 'Stop it!' gesture. "It's okay. I'm okay."

"It's alright to be upset."

"It is, but today is about her, not me. It took my mom a while, but she did end up actually liking you, so I'm glad you came."

"Really?"

"Yeah. You and I put each other through various forms of hell. I'd say we're even. I have Ranger and you'll find your equivalent eventually ... if you don't screw it up."

"Ouch again."

"Take care of yourself ... okay?"

"I always do."

"Yeah, I know."

And she walked away from me as easily as she did over a year ago. I've had my share of women before and after Stephanie, but I've yet to find one who got to me like she did. Maybe that's what drove me here today, to see if I'd used the good memories I have of her to build her up in my mind to be more beautiful, funnier, and sexier than she is in reality.

Just from talking to her for five minutes, I know I hadn't been exaggerating shit. She's still everything I want and more. Manoso was smart to marry her while he had the chance. There are nights I can't sleep after a long day where I still lay awake and wonder if I would've pushed the issue, would I be the one she's married to right now? But then I see the two of them together and I'm forced to admit I didn't have a fucking chance in hell of anything permanent with her. I turned into the pastime I originally thought she'd be to me.

I didn't move except to stick my hands in my pockets as I tracked her progress across the Hall Manoso had rented for the somber occasion. I tried without much success to swallow down the bile that rose when she slid an arm beneath the jacket of Ranger's suit to wrap more intimately around his waist. She leaned heavily into him, seeking comfort from the man I'll never be. His own arm came around her shoulders as he whispered something in her ear that had her relaxing even more into his body.

After all the dinners she'd invited me to, and the encouragement she'd given me when she realized that I was seriously considering marrying Stephanie, I should be mourning Helen on the day of her funeral, but I found myself selfishly remembering and burying the past I'd had with her daughter instead.