A Choice With No Regrets

Attack on Titan fanfiction

By

Blue Sonnet (Nana_41175)

Author's Notes: Please note that this story has fem!Levi and deals with the issues of forced marriage and fake relationships. It's a historical AU set in a different frame, where the military observes a rigid and traditional structure that bars women from enlisting as soldiers. The story is based on Aivelin's fabulous book cover which can be seen in my Tumblr.

Enjoy!

Chapter One

It was only a matter of time before Levi's luck ran out, and when the time finally came, things had become too complicated— with the Corps, with Erwin, with everything; but then, life was never kind to Levi.

Things could rapidly unravel during an expedition outside the walls. In Levi's case, the injury incurred was not even due to a rampaging titan, but to a shower of falling debris steep in shards of glass and flying shrapnels of wood.

"You're bleeding," cried Hange, and it was only then that Levi looked down and saw the blood, rapidly blossoming, like a red flower. There was so much blood, it was unbelievable. Levi's fingers came away all slick with red. That was when the pain struck.

"Don't," said Levi, collapsing on the cobbled streets even as Hange hurried over to staunch the flow of blood. "Don't touch me."

"Levi, the wound is deep," warned Hange, hurrying to strip Levi of jacket and shirt to use as a pressure bandage when their hands were insufficient. "I won't be able to help you if I can't see it properly. Stop fighting me!"

Black was rapidly encroaching on Levi's vision, but panic made Levi strike out at Hange's hands. They musn't see. Nobody must know.

"Musn't…see…" muttered Levi, finally succumbing to unconsciousness.

For a while, there was only darkness and a deep silence before the strange, inarticulate noises began to intrude on Levi's consciousness. Little by little, the muffled voices began to make sense as Levi gradually resurfaced.

"Hey, she's awake."

Levi blinked uncertainly, and the vague colored shapes looming above gradually coalesced into Hange's bespectacled face as they peered down at Levi.

Levi's voice was a dry croak: "Where…?"

"Base hospital," Hange said, sitting down on a chair beside Levi's bed. "We got you into surgery just in time."

Hange watched as Levi lifted a hand to touch the bandages wrapped tight around the abdominal area, and they actually smiled as Levi, as though suddenly remembering, jerked a hand upward to check the bandages wrapped even tighter around the chest. They were still there.

"I've got to say, Levi," said Hange wryly, nodding at Levi's bound chest. "That was some secret you were nursing there."

Was.

Levi's tongue was dry as it ran over equally dry lips. "Who knows?"

Hange's voice was apologetic as they said, "we had to do first aid on you in the field, then we had get you into surgery, so…"

"Just fucking answer the question, Hange."

For a moment that sounded so much like the old Levi that Hange obliged, "a lot of people, I can imagine. It's not something that can be kept a secret, after all."

Hange's gaze was unbearably soft as they took in Levi's face, the wide eyes, and said, "I'm sorry, Levi."

"Erwin?"

"Of course. In fact, he's been over to see you while you were asleep. I suspect you'd want to speak to him, tell him everything."

Levi did not want to see him.

Hange stood up. "In fact, I'll go get him now. He did give orders to be informed when you've awakened."

"Wait, Hange!"

But Hange was gone, leaving Levi inside the bare hospital room with a nurse. Judging from her awkward stance at the foot of the bed, it seemed she knew, too.

Everyone knew.

"Fuck," whispered Levi as she turned her head to burrow deeper into the pillow.

Erwin- that bastard- did not come immediately, nor within the hour, and Levi was finally dozing off, facing the wall and with her back to the room, when she suddenly felt the bed mattress dip beside her. Levi froze as she felt a large, firm hand on her shoulder, turning her over. She jerked once, hissing in pain as it shot through her abdomen, but it was nothing compared to the shock of seeing Erwin, sitting on her bed. He was so close that she could only see his face. She had not even heard the door open.

The nurse had gone; perhaps Erwin had dismissed her. They were the only ones in the room. There was no greeting, no words exchanged as Erwin turned urgent fingers to Levi's shirt, quickly undoing the buttons.

"What are you doing? Stop it, Erwin!" cried Levi, weakly grasping at her rumpled shirt and trying to pull the gaping vee shut, but Erwin's hands were relentless as he swept aside her fingers, revealing once again the bound chest and her true identity, so carefully hidden all these months.

Levi flushed hard as she stared at Erwin's grim features, the intense blue eyes ablaze with something like anger, but not surprise. She opened her mouth to speak, but he was ahead of her: "They will be coming for you any minute now, Levi. They're already here. They will take you away and I am going to do everything I can to stop them. Do you trust me?"

Mutely, Levi nodded.

"Don't say anything, just follow my lead."

"Erwin—"

"Later. There will be time later, Levi," Erwin said, his voice incredibly gentle, "but right now you must allow me to take certain liberties."

Barely ten minutes passed and the Military Police did arrive, filing into Levi's room without so much as knocking, only to find Commander Erwin perched on the patient's bed and tenderly holding her hand.

The sight was enough to stop Nile Dok in his tracks.

"Erwin! For the love of god. You do realize what the Captain– Levi–" Nile began. Words seemed to desert him rapidly as outrage took over and he gestured at Levi with a contemptuous hand.

"I do realize," Erwin replied evenly. "I always have."

Levi's eyes widened as she turned her head sharply to regard him, ignoring the throb of pain deep in her belly. The ice-cold feeling running down her spine was much worse. Something was going on; something big was at the end of the thread of lies that Erwin was industriously weaving, but would it be enough to throw off the likes of the Military Police?

"Then surely you realize the many rules you've broken by taking a woman into the Corps!" roared Nile. "She can't remain within the ranks–"

"But she can," Erwin murmured, maintaining the quiet, unhurried tone with a hint of steely authority that Levi knew so well, "because we are betrothed."

There was a short silence as the group stood thunderstruck several feet away from Levi's bed. Levi stared at Erwin, unable to believe her ears. She would have torn her hand away if his grip were not so tight.

Nile stared at Erwin, then at Levi before going back to Erwin again. "You can't be serious," he finally said.

"I am."

"Erwin, you can't-"

"Invoke such a thing through a Commander's rights and privileges? Rest assured I can. I just did," Erwin said, completely unperturbed. "The next step would be to take me to court, if you wish, Nile. It's a shame that it would take some weeks though. By that time, we're probably already married."

Nile began to splutter. "You can't do something like this and think you can get away with it, Erwin!" he exclaimed.

Erwin merely shrugged. "Then we'll see each other in court."

It took a while for the Military Police to leave, but once Levi was sure that Nile Dok and his men had stormed away down the corridor, she twisted her hand free from Erwin's.

"That's your plan?" she hissed. "That's your fucking plan?"

"Do let me know if you can think of anything better under the circumstances," said Erwin, already moving to stand from the bed.

"Fuck you! I'm not going to marry you."

"Get some rest, Levi," Erwin said with infuriating calm as he walked away towards the door. "Everything will look better in the morning. Good night."

Just like that, the Commander was gone.

Breathing hard, Levi stared at the door. This was not happening. There was no way this was happening. She would like to punch something- the Commander's face preferably- but with Erwin out of reach, Levi would have to contend with the pillow, and an oath that could be heard well into the corridor: "Fuuuck!"