Wakumonogatari

Yukinoshita Cat (Domestic)

001

Another misconception that today's misguided youth lead themselves to believe is that there is a great growth in maturity that one undertakes, magically, when one transitions from a second year to a third year, as if the numerical advance from '2' to '3' or the way everyone else aside from your fellow third years address you as 'senpai', all superficial changes, if I may add, contributes in any significant way to one's maturity.

Yes, I am now in my third year, but I will not delude myself into thinking that I have changed at all, especially when it came to the way people perceived me. Not that I care, but I feel that this is a somewhat significant detail to address.

For example, despite my many attempts to fix my ruined reputation, there are still some who regard me with open animosity, although I didn't expect it to be the case otherwise. And since we are already on the topic of public perception, let me say now that, despite how much I wished otherwise, Hayama was still, in the eyes of many, the undisputed king of the school, as in the way Miura was still the queen bee of the school, and, standing above everyone else, so high that nobody could reach her, was Yukinoshita Yukino.

So everything was the same as it used to be, hierarchy wise, with me being the black sheep and those three still being their glorious selves.

But enough about that already tired subject. Let's talk about Yukinoshita Yukino.

Yukinohita Yukino who was perfect. Yukinoshita Yuikino who was like a goddess. Yukinoshita Yukino who, like Hayama and Miura and Totsuka and Yuigahama and me and everyone else who was now a third year, had remained exactly the same.

In fact, I would even go as far to say that Yukinoshita Yukino, compared to everyone else, had changed the least.

And for a while I was actually relieved by this fact, not seeing anything wrong or unnatural in the static and unchanging Yukinoshita, despite how such an outcome obviously clashes with my desire for something 'genuine'. However, the thought of a Yukinoshita, a service club, suspended in time and unaffected by change, good or bad, was very tempting to me.

I then fell into a case of cognitive dissonance, two mental states warring against each other, and the ambivalence drove me to near insanity. I then recalled a passage from a Hemingway novel, and now that I have the time to give it some thought, I recall that it was from 'A Farewell to Arms'. In it, Hemingway expressed a perspective that, I thought, was congruent to my own perspective towards Yukinoshita. And I paraphrase: "The world breaks everyone leaving only those who are strong in the broken places. And if it doesn't break you, it kills you. It kills the very brave and the very good impartially."

I then came to the conclusion that if I never see Yukinoshita change or age or mature in any sort of way, if she stays trapped in the boundary between second and third year, then in return I'd never have to personally witness the world break her.

These were my subconscious fears unearthed, and I shamelessly embraced them.

Once I had decided on my objective, I spent the first two months with the service club producing, with my powers of subtle manipulation, a faux harmony, mirroring the way Hayama's clique ignored reality and lived in their own little fantasy world. My efforts proved fruitful. Whether Yukinoshita or Yuigahama caught onto my intentions or not, we, the Service Club, fell into a sort of purgatory. Nothing really happened. Empty words were exchanged. We became mannequins, imitating human mannerisms for the sake of appearing human. Were we even human? Just because something acts human and has human-like traits, could they really be considered human?

Although to me, who had undergone those nightmarish events last summer, was not fit to talk about matters regarding humanity.

It was not one day before I had these thoughts when, during the evening strolls I had undertaken as a means to alleviate the stress of being a third year student, among other things, I happened to chance upon Yukinoshita Yukino, changing right before me.

Although, the term 'changing' at this case may not be accurate, in fact, it is completely wrong.

In the first place, there were two Yukinoshita's.

And, really, only one of them was 'changing', although I guess 'shapeshifting' would be a more appropriate term.

The first Yukinoshita, lying on the concrete sidewalk with her uniform all dirty and tousled, was my Yukinoshita, the perfect and ideal Yukinoshita that will not break as long as I am there to keep her locked up in my little fantasy world, away from the real world. Never advancing. Never changing.

And the second, this doppelgänger, standing proudly, with her lips spread wide, revealing rows of sharpened teeth. At least three inches taller than her counterpart, with a conspicuous change in her figure—although it was the sort of change that I was not really all that adverse to—and on top of her head, poking out playfully, were furry, white cat ears. And swaying sultrily behind her imposing figure, was a cat's tail.

To put it simply, this second Yukinoshita was what I'd imagine Yukinoshita Yukino to be in three years' time. Plus with cat parts, for some reason.

Omake

Komachi: Hello, this is your favourite imouto character, Komachi!

Iroha: And this is your favourite kohai character, Iroha!

Both together: And we hope that you liked this first chapter of Wakumonogatari!

Komachi: Still, this is quite the ambitious project, wouldn't you say, Iroha-chan? Balancing the themes and characters of Monogatari and Oregairu seems pretty difficult, especially for this random writer that's never written any stories for Monogatari or Oregairu before...

Iroha: Yeah, he's obviously way in over his head!

Komachi: Well, when you say it like that...

Iroha: Anyways, let's go ahead with our first quiz!

Komachi: Roger! What's black, white, and red all over?

Iroha: This is too easy! The newspaper!

Komachi: Nope! But it's certainly not this fan-fic! I mean, who would read this non-sense!

Iroha: Hey, aren't you supposed to be an optimistic type character?!

Komachi: Even optimism has it's limits!

Both together: Next time! Yukinoshita Cat (Domestic), Part 002!