Ch.2

The world seemed to move in slow motion as Megamind ran behind his rock' n 'roll she-devil. A million and one thoughts flew through his mind at warp speed with the predominate battle being between all the colorful ways this situation could blow up in his face and HOW THE FUCK IS THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENING?! And, as long as he was riding that crazy train of thought, what the hell was he supposed to do?

Anxiety caused a damp sheen to cover his large forehead and his palms became more than a little sweaty by the time they entered the back stage rooms. Oh, gross! I knew I should have stolen those gloves. I don't care what Minion says I-

His internal rant came to a dead halt when the dark vixen pushed his body against the closing dressing room door. Every part of him froze and the more she pressed her body against his- splaying her hands across his narrow chest, nibbling on the sharp line of his smooth jaw- the more petrified the teen became.

She snickered a bit when she stopped her ministrations long enough to study his face. Poor Megamind had turned from blue to purple, his body plastered to the door. He looked like he wanted to bolt, screaming bloody murder on his way out. But that little pink tongue of his poked out and licked his bottom lip when she kissed his neck and she could see the part of him that really, really wanted to see this through... and god, it turned her on!

Four quick steps back. A sly smile. Dainty fingers undid the tight bodice constricting the soft skin of two fleshy mounds. She dropped it to the floor. Megamind nearly fainted.

"Hey, Space Candy. Like what you see?" She giggled at his barely nod and deepening blush before she gave him his way out. "Or you wanna run home?"

Some part of his brain-or other body parts- must have been functional, because he somehow manged to shake his head, negative.

The girl leaned against the vanity table, tossing her dark hair behind her. Tilting her head she quietly commanded, "Get over here."

He was happy to follow orders, but his stupid head felt all wobbly and his knees threatened to buckle at any moment. Four steps was turning out to be quite a distance.

And then there was no distance. There was only naked pale skin and blue hands. What was he supposed to do with his hands?

She grabbed his wrists and placed a palm on each breast, and gave a hard squeeze.

Oh...well, then. Okay. That's-yes-that's where the hands go. Yup. Hands, hands go there.

Megamind licked his lips once again and cleared his throat, but only to force down the slightly hysterical chuckle that wanted to bubble up and out at this most inappropriate moment. This really might not end well.

Megamind understood the basics of sex. He grew up in a prison for crying out loud! Randy men with too much time on their hands and long, lonely nights made for some interesting conversation. While many of the inmates at least tried to shelter their alien resident, others could care less what he over heard and some even attempted steer him in the wrong direction.

If you want it, take it.

He remembered the way his stomach wormed when inmate B. Wilson pulled him aside and told him that he was old enough to know the facts of life. Don't pay and don't ask. A man should never go to bed lonely or horny, even a guy that looks as bad as you do.

Fortunately, one of his 'uncles' overheard the tail end of the conversation and slipped a note to a guard to give to the warden explaining that the boy needed The Talk. Later that very evening Warden Jones sat the teenager down to explain how things ought to go: be gentle, be patient, 'no' means 'no,' don't be selfish, always treat her like a lady, always act like a gentleman. It was awkward and possibly held the record for most stammering, throat clearing and averted gazes per minute, but Megamind trusted the warden more than the new inmate that his uncles had warned him about.

Besides, all of his favorite movie and book villains never acted that way. Sure, they did kidnapped the damsel and they did coerce the lady into suggestible positions, but it was about the push and the pull. It was a delicate dance of unconventional wooing. And while it was a known fact that the bad guy never got the girl in the end, it was the challenge of turning her eyes and heart from her savior to her captor that intrigued him. Now that was a game he thought would be fun to play, not brute force and overpowering.

(Interestingly, a week or two afterward, inmate B. Wilson was kept in the protected zone of the prison having suffered from several life threatening "accidents.")

But how was he supposed to be a gentle when the girl was practically clawing his shirt and jacket off of him? She was down to black satin panties in a matter of minutes, so what patience was needed? How was he supposed to treat her like a lady when she was shoving him into the chair, straddling his lap, hurrying to undo his belt buckle? And what did she think about him? Because he surely hadn't had a chance to show her that he could even be a gentleman.

"Um," his belt was undone and the girl was attempting to shimmy the jeans down his narrow hips.

"What?" she looked at him a little breathless and a tad confused. The the realization struck her. "Oh, it's cool that you don't have a rubber. I have one some where 'round here." She began pawing frantically through the clothing strewn about the room.

"Um."

"Ta-da!" she raised the wrapped square above her head, waving it back and forth like she had single-handedly captured the enemy's flag. "Now, let's get this bad boy on ya."

"Wait!" Megamind shot to his feet, one hand raised to stop her from coming closer and the other keeping his pants from falling to the floor. He licked his lips nervously trying to put into words what he needed to say.

Looking at this beautiful sex-goddess, her hip cocked out and a scrap away from full nudity, Megamind almost slapped himself. This was every man's dream! And he was ruining it! No Minion to blame for this one.

"Space Candy, just relax. You'll freaking love it. I promise."

He could only shake his head and grit his teeth while he straightened his pants and pulled his shirt back over his head.

The girl's face twisted into something fierce and bitter. "What? You think you're too good for me? 'Cause you're not! I do who I want, when I want. You know how many guys are lined up for this," she groped herself, "and you just want to play me? I told you what was gonna happen if you came back with me!"

Seeing dark streaks trail down her cheeks as she tried to cover herself with her arms, Megamind rushed to the young woman's side. He had never made a girl cry before. He didn't like it.

"No, no, no! You're-you're perfect." He tentatively put his hands on her shoulders. "It's me. I just can't do this. I don't know what to do- and it's moving too fast- and I want to do it right- and how can I be a gentleman when I don't even know your name?"

It all came out in one long breath. She looked at him like she wanted to cry harder, and so he decided to search for his jacket.

Thin, toned arms slipped through leather sleeves. Already he felt a little more secure, a little more protected. The night had been a bust in almost every way.

He walked to the door without looking back and turned the handle to leave.

"Crystal."

Two dark brows furrowed. "What?"

"My name- my real name, is Crystal," she sniffed. "My mom said it's 'cause she could see that I would wear my heart on my sleeve. So, now you know why I have to cover it up. It's all about presentation. People can break a girl named Crystal. But no one can break Juliette Heartless...so that's who I am now."

Megamind nodded. He was learning all about presentation.

"That's what you're doing here too? Aren't you?" she continued, wiping her eyes and lighting a cigarette. "I heard people talk about a blue kid trying to make a name for himself. Trying to be real bad."

Megamind shuffled his feet, shrugging nonchalantly. "I am bad. I always have been. It's what I'm good at. I'm going to be the baddest villain Metrocity has ever seen; it's my destiny."

Crystal smiled at that. "Well," she said while letting out a billow of smoke and smothering her cigarette butt on the dressing table, "let me tell you a little something about show biz. People don't care too much about the middle, hell, they forget about it as soon as it's over! But a big entrance and a grand finale- even if it's just one time- now that's something they'll always remember you by." She was leaning forward eagerly like she was telling him the greatest secret ever known.

And it must have been so, because even though she was still topless, Megamind could only focus on the gem of knowledge she had just bestowed.

"A big entrance!" he shouted. "That's it! All I have to do is get the right weapon, the right ambiance and let the drones of Metrocity watch my epic battle!"

"Yeah," she skipped up to him. "And don't forget the right costume and makeup. Play up the special effects. People flip for laser light shows. I'm saving up to buy some for my band."

His entire face lit up with glee. Oh, he loved a good idea. Maybe, maybe tonight wasn't a total flop.

"So, I still have one last song to perform." Crystal started getting dressed, but the blue boy in the room was still lost thought for his big debut. "Hey! You gonna help with the finale or not?"

"What did you have in mind?" he asked, smirking and biting his bottom lip.

"Come here and then I'll tell you the plan," she said as she fastened the last of her bodice. When he came close enough she tugged at the collar of this leather jacket and brought her mouth to his neck.

"Trust me," she instructed when she felt his muscles tense and his feet try to backpedal.

Red stained lips brushed across smooth blue skin. Then gently, ever so gently, Juliette Heartless kissed his neck. Softly at first- so he wouldn't freak out- those red lips opened and began sucking. It grew in intensity as the seconds ticked on and, what was once pleasurable, now caused Megamind to hiss and pull his body from her grasp.

"Ow!" His hand covered his neck. "What was that? I mean, at first it was really...wow, that was really good, but then it just hurt." He watched her swipe a tube of lipstick across her mouth, press and pucker a few times, then stick out her tongue at her reflection.

"Let me see it," she said moving his hand out of the way. There was a deep eggplant tinted bruise taking up a large portion of his neck. Perfect. "That, my blue lollipop, is called a hickey."

"Heekey?"

"Yeah, so this what you're gonna do. I want you to wait in here for three minutes after I go back on stage and start singing, then go to the table with your friend. Sit for exactly one minute. Look like you're real bored. And then get up and walk out the front door. Got it?"

"Um, that doesn't really sound like a very grand finale. And what is the purpose of this heekey then?" The ways of women are very confusing. Maybe I should postpone Operation: Atomic Cherry for a while longer.

"Don't worry about it, I know what I'm doing." She ruffled a hand through her hair. A band member called through the door. They needed to be on stage ten minutes ago! She opened the door, but paused before stepping through. "Hey, maybe next time I'm in town, we can go all the way?"

Megamind's brows shot up. "You- with, with me- another time?" But she was already out the door, laughing while he sputtered. Maybe there was hope for him after all.

Exactly three minutes and two seconds after Crystal took the stage, Megamind made his way back to the main bar. He fiddled with the popped collar of his jacket self-consciously. I hope that this purple abomination doesn't show. I'll never live down getting punched in the neck by a girl. A few gawking patrons nudged each other as he passed by, pointing to the dark splotch and raised their beers to him. He snarled and put on his best prison face. Let them mock me tonight, soon they'll be begging for my pardon.

A smiling Minion sat at the little corner table, holding his Shirley Temple in one hand and waving at his friend with the other. As soon as the sour young alien sat down, he swiped the sugary drink from his robotic hand and gulped down half of it. The glass almost cracked when he slapped it back down onto the tabletop.

"Sooooo," Minion leaned in giggling, "how did it go?"

Megamind crossed his legs and arms. He looked around the room, then inspected his nails as if they were part of the most interesting fingers he had ever seen. He popped his collar. It was when he turned his head to pretend to listen to Crystal's singing that he heard Minion's loud gasp.

"Sir, what-what is that?!" the little fish scowled and stood up so fast that his chair fell over. "She attacked you?!"

"No!" Megamind raised his hands trying to calm his aquatic companion down. People were starting to stare. "It's called a heekey."

"A hickey? She gave you a hickey?" But before he could even ask how or what exactly a hickey was, the teen was on his feet, walking towards the front of the building.

"Let's go, Minion. This place bores me," he said a little too loudly.

"Hey, Megamind!" a voice boomed from the speakers. The two boys spun around to face the stage. Crystal held out a pair of black panties towards him. "You forgot to do the honors!"

Every patron whooped and howled. One of the brutes from the front door pushed him up to the front of the stage, smiling and patting him too roughly on the back. He stepped up next to the wild girl helping him make a name for himself, and with the bright spots lights on him, the mark on his pale blue neck stood out for all the crowd to see. She handed him the panties with a cheeky wink.

"So, what'll it be boys? He hit it, so should he keep the trophy or pass it along for good luck?"

Men pushed and shoved their way closer to the stage shouting, "Toss it! Toss it!" If that blue, big headed alien could get laid by some hottie like that on stage, then maybe he had special powers. Maybe those panties really would be lucky. A brawl would break out if he didn't do something soon.

Megamind looked at the men bustling and shouting down below him and then stared at the silky fabric in his hands. One time. One time was all it would take for them to believe whatever he wanted them to believe, so long as he made it big and loud enough. And this girl put her bad reputation on the line for him. He wasn't about to let her down.

He raised a finger and turned his back to the group spiraling out of control in front of him. Long fingers reached into his belt, pulling out a blue cube. Grabbing a shot glass full of something off of the amplifier, he poured one solitary drop. A smirk twisted at his mouth when he pulled out one small instrument from his Duffel Bag of Infamy. If they want it, I'll give it to them.

His smirk turned wicked as he spun to face the raging crowd, throwing the black lingerie high into the air. Every hand strained to reach for the falling material, but right before it grazed the tallest of the lot's finger tips, Megamind did the unthinkable. A blazing pillar of fire shot out of the tiny pen-like object in his hand, completely disintegrating the feminine undergarment.

Every person froze in place, flabbergasted at what had just happened. All eyes swept from the ash falling from ceiling to the blue alien on stage, mouths gaping. Show time!

Megamind swooped an arm around his dark lady, tugging her waist, pressing her close to his body. And, with as much gusto as he could muster, he kissed her senseless.

Hearing the crowd come to their senses he pulled away from the dazed face of the girl who had shown him more kindness in one night than he had in his entire life. He gave a little bow to her and smiled like a true deviant. Hooking the duffel bag onto his shoulder, he bolted off the stage, stepping on the heads of some of the patrons while he made his get away.

"Next time you're in town, don't forget!" he called out while he dashed out of the room, Minion right on his heels.

Lacquered nails brushed against still tingling lips. A true smile blossomed. "I won't," she whispered.