He couldn't remember a time where he woke without excruciating pain eating away at his mind.

Even in his dreams, he could feel sharp needles stabbing into his nerves and making white hot flames lick his insides. There was nothing but that sensation, that fire burning him until he woke screaming for help. It was difficult to tell if his eyes were even open or if he was truly awake. His brain tricked him. He was left in a constant state of utter panic that made his heart twist painfully and his lungs shrink. Nightmare after nightmare, voices and voices..

If his brothers hadn't come, it was those two..

"There ain't no foolin' the Foot!"

"Yeah. And I thought you were suppose to be the smart one."

He couldn't move, they sat on him..

".. I wanna help!"

"Hurry, Rock, he's squirmy!"

"Comin'!"

NO!

Laughter boomed into his eardrums just as the hammer crushed into his shell.

Donnie screamed.

"Donnie, it's okay," Mikey's voice came through his hell. Even then he was fearful of opening his eyes and still not finding his reality. Peace. Mikey hushed him. His voice came in sweet whispers to calm him and bring him back. There was a sadness in his breathe that brought his attention. Despite his entire frame begging for death, he couldn't possibly ignore his brother's voice. His body shook, a violent tremor as he woke and inhaled. Mikey gently pushed Don's shoulder down to keep him from moving. There was a small pause only filled with Donnie's heavy breathes and whimpers.

"Donnie."

"M..Mike-"

"I'm here."

That's all Don needed to fully surrender and open his eyes. He felt the soft mattress instead of blood stained concrete. A rush of relief filled him. It was enough to make Don let out a choked sob. The nightmares became more and more frequent. Blurring the line so dangerously that it terrorized the very thought of sleeping again. Donnie's fevered skin burnt under Mikey's fingers as he held him. He was getting worse. Mikey knew this despite the panicked lies his family would tell him whenever he asked. He wasn't a child. He understood. Donnie was the only truth that he was granted as he kept him close in his arms. Protecting him, whispering 'sorries' whenever his brother slept during another episode of nightmares.

Thankfully, the thrashing had stopped but Mikey didn't let go. Donnie had opened his eyes, staring down first at the drenched bed sheets from his sweat and dots of blood. He nestled his arm closer into his body, his hand loosely covered his face to hide the etched expression of pain. It only took a few minutes before Don fell asleep again, losing consciousness from the sheer amount of nerve endings blinding him with screams of agony that had not yet ceased. It never would. His shell was permanently damaged and sharp with broken edges like glass. Blood seemed like a never ending supply as it pooled out, soaking layers upon layers of bandages that Leo had helped put on. Nothing was enough. Sleep was the only relief.

Mikey understand but he wasn't ready to accept it.