Summary:

Shepard and her crew start the next part of their mission

Liara wasn't quite tapping her foot as she made notes on her pad. She might have however, had there been an easy way to do so.

Unfortunately, the mildly impatient asari was sitting too awkwardly in her chair to make such an action possible. It was the chair's fault, honestly. The chair was too small. The desk was too small. The goddess cursed room was too small.

The chair in question was practically flush against the wall. The chair's short back and lack of accommodation for an asari crest forced Liara to lean forward in a less than comfortable position. Additionally, the space under the desk was unable to accept her crossed legs, forcing her to draw her legs under the chair, another concession, which left them out of her preferred placement.

She sighed. She was already stiff, the Alliance issue mattress having left her craving her own bed. That monument to comfortable slumber had been left behind on Thessia. Even the bed in her cabin aboard the Petite'aile was far superior to the bed she'd slept on last night. It was difficult to believe how quickly years of being able to sleep on bare ground had been erased by a single month wrapped in the obtrusive luxury of the T'Soni estate. She knew she would adjust once they were back on the Normandy, but she wasn't looking forward to doing so.

Given her own condition, she could hardly believe how quickly and effortlessly Sarah had erupted from bed this morning. The woman had snapped awake as if it were the best sleep she'd had in years. This should not be a surprise, Liara reflected with a smile, as the commander was a young woman of twenty nine.

She paused for a moment to wipe a light layer of condensation from her pad, another mild annoyance. Shepard had left the door to the washroom open, and the bedroom was blasted with steam each time the commander turned the shower on.

That was another thing that Liara had been shocked by as she started her own morning routine. Water on the station was rationed for military personnel, just like it had been on the Normandy. Shepard had leapt in behind her almost immediately when Liara started her shower, reminding her of the strict limit placed on their water allowance. She'd said it with a grin, but behind the smile was a reminder that Sarah didn't want to be the one left unable to rinse once their allotment was reached.

Again, Liara wondered why she hadn't insisted on simply spending their one night on Arcturus in a hotel. Preferably one in the station's small but growing asari quarter, where at least some degree of luxury was practically guaranteed.

She looked up as the washroom door opened fully, revealing Shepard as she stepped into the room wearing a towel and a smile.

"Isn't this great?" The commander took the two steps to the bed, and her open overnight bag. "I've always wanted to draw officer's accommodation when I've been on Arcturus." The smile turned sheepish. "I've just never been able to rationalize needing more than a bunk in the barracks with the other marines."

And that, of course, was why Liara had been so willing to spend the night in a room that might generously be judged to measure eight square meters. Shepard asked for so little, and offered so much in return. When Liara had come back from meeting with Hackett, the commander had already requisitioned a single night in visiting officer's quarters. Unlike Liara, Sarah seemed to view their stay in such as an adventure, a heretofore unknown experience.

Liara brushed all thoughts of discomfort from her mind as she returned her bondmate's smile. "It was certainly convenient, Shepard." The human had grown increasingly happy as their return to the Normandy became imminent. Liara resolved to do nothing that might dampen it.

"I know, right?" Shepard pulled some personal care items from her bag as she dumped the prior days clothing in. "Hackett's office, the mess hall, everything we need is close by." She turned back, returning to the washroom in a wave of coconut, carrying her uniform and brush.

Liara was disappointed that the room contained no mirror outside of the washroom. That meant she would miss the opportunity to watch the commander brush her hair, an activity the asari took no small pleasure in observing.

The maiden originally thought that humans were rather ordinary in their self care. The fact that the Normandy's showers dispensed nothing but pure water, without a hint of scent or softening agent, had originally led her to believe that humans didn't care about such.

It was only when Liara had encountered human women showering in the communal washroom aboard the Normandy that she realized how wrong she had been. Humans had cleansers, conditioners, and moisturizers to rival even the most narcissistic asari. Athame knew Liara had a preference in crest lotion, but some of the women aboard the Normandy had a collection of care products that likely took up the majority of their personal mass allotment.

It was only when Shepard had begun to reciprocate on her initially tentative expressions of interest that such information became relevant to the young scientist. Upon leaving the Citadel after the Saren mission, the requirements of human self care became of particular importance to Liara. The Petite'aile was originally stocked without the needs of humans in mind, and Liara had personally made certain that oversight was corrected before they departed for Mindoir.

Such research had been required! There were so many functions to human care products. Careful observation of Shepard had revealed the human followed a fairly rudimentary personal care regimen. Sarah did demonstrate a preference for particular civilian brands of toothpaste and moisturizer. Unfortunately, she seemed willing to accept whatever body wash, shampoo, and conditioner that was readily available. That meant that the majority of the time she purchased her products from anywhere near where the ship was docked. Such products tended to be harsh in nature, and have artificially floral scents that Liara found unpleasant.

Once she realized that there were multiple possibilities, Liara worked her way through various alternatives in an effort to identify those that were as agreeable to her senses as the scented waters back home. Unsurprisingly, although the salarians has several high quality items, it was the humans who dominated the haircare market.

Liara eventually settled on a well reviewed and accepted, albeit expensive, line of products. After narrowing down her selections even more, she had been unable to decide between 'coconut' and 'vanilla', scented, eventually deciding to purchase selections of both. The fragrances blended well with Shepard's natural scent, without any of the overpoweringly floral overtones present in most of the commander's original répertoire.

The asari had been well pleased with her results on the hair front. Makeup, on the other hand, left her confused and flustered. Sarah seldom bothered with much, and what she did use was never applied in Liara's presence. Shepard's occasional use was not helpful in providing the asari with enough information to allow her to identify what the human might need. She'd eventually thrown her hands up at the idea of keeping Shepard supplied with makeup, or with any other personal product that lacked a near equivalent for asari.

For such an apparently simple species, humans could be more complex than she'd originally realized.

Shepard again emerged from the washroom, this time in her uniform.

"Ready?" She tossed the last of her personal items in her bag before zipping it closed.

"I am, Shepard." After fourteen hours in this claustrophobic room, the Normandy was going to feel positively roomy.

"Perfect," replied Sarah as she picked up both bags. "We can head over to the mess for a late breakfast, and then we'll head to the docks."

Liara again managed to smile.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

Shepard had a jaunty bounce to her step.

It wasn't often that Liara was fortunate enough to see the commander struggle to contain her enjoyment.

Shepard cut a dashing figure as the pair walked through the promenade on their way to the docks. Shepard was in her smartly pressed BDUs, Liara with her hand on Shepard's elbow. It seemed to be all that all Shepard could do to maintain her professional demeanor and not greet every passerby with a cheesy grin instead of professional nod.

Liara knew that her presence had something to do with the commander's mood, but the majority of it came from the human's anticipation to being back aboard the Normandy. Mindoir, Thessia, and the Petite'aile had all had had their highlights, but Shepard obviously longed to return to the ship she commanded.

Despite Shepard's notoriety and Liara's companionship, their travel to the docks was an uneventful one. An easy transition through security, and a leisurely walk through the Alliance section of the docking ring, and Shepard and Liara found themselves at the Normandy's berth.

Along with most of the crew.

"Hey Commander." Joker approached Shepard from out of a group of crewmen.

"Joker!" The commander's enthusiasm continued to grow. "What's going on? Why isn't everyone aboard?"

Liara took a step away from the commander as Pressly approached and saluted.

"Orders, Commander. Captain Dillard has a formal change of command ceremony scheduled for sixteen hundred. Only personnel involved with the board of inspection or the refit are permitted aboard until the captain is formally relieved."

"I heard the ship was cleared for service days ago." Shepard looked at Joker even as she posed the question to Pressly. "Is Invectus coming to this little soirée that Dillard put together so everyone knows he commanded the Normandy for a couple of hours?"

"No Ma'am. The admiral is supposed to say a few words."

"Hackett?" Shepard turned back to Pressly for that.

"No Commander, Admiral Mikhailovich," came Pressly's reply.

"Whatever." Shepard rolled her eyes. "I'm not going to spend the afternoon looking at my ship through a window. It's time to get out of here."

She walked up to the lone serviceman posted in front of the gangway to her ship.

"Corporal, stand aside. My crew and I have places to be."

The young man stood his ground. "Apologies Commander, Admiral's orders. No one is allowed to board until the change of command."

Shepard grinned. "Spectre authority, Corporal. That's my ship out there."

Liara watched as several conflicting emotions flicked across the man's face. Obviously the Alliance needed to train its soldiers better about where "spectre" fell in the rank structure - outside and at the top.

"Commander, I don't have the authority…"

"Call whoever you need to, but while you're doing that, we're going to get settled in." She turned back to Pressly. "XO, secure the ship and make ready for departure."

"Aye aye, Ma'am." The lieutenant saluted the commander, and started collecting the rest of the Normandy crew with assistance from Lieutenants Adams and Alenko.

While her crew collected their personal effects and started boarding the Normandy, Shepard moved to join Liara where she was talking to Garrus, Tali, and Wrex.

"C'mon guys, time to go. Someone is eventually going to show up try to keep us from leaving before the ceremony."

There was a moment's awkward silence before Wrex spoke.

"I'm not coming, Shepard."

"What? We need you!"

Wrex replied with a deep chuckle. "No you don't. You've got Blue to take care of you, Tali to take care of the ship, and the three of you might be able to keep Garrus from shooting himself in the foot."

"Wrex…"

"Shepard…" Liara watched as the commander started to lose her patience, but the krogan continued just in time.

"Shepard, you've shown me what a galaxy where the the krogan are valued might look like. A galaxy where the genophage doesn't define us."

"I value you Wrex…" Shepard began.

"I know you do, Shepard. We took down Saren together. A krogan made a difference. I'd forgotten what that was like. It's time for me to show others. Time for me to go back."

When Shepard didn't respond, he continued. "I'm a Krogan Battlemaster Shepard. That used to mean something. It's time that it meant something again."

The commander stepped forward and reached up to put her hand on the krogan's shoulder.

"You're sure Big Guy?"

"Yeah."

"Then I'll come by Tuchanka when we're done in the Terminus." She stepped back as she looked up at the krogan with a gleam in her eye. "But you're going to miss out on killing a lot of geth!"

"They were fun for a while, Shepard. It just got too easy. It's time for something hard." The big krogan turned and left, heading back towards the promenade.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

Liara stepped away from the galley, carrying tea for herself and coffee for Shepard. She felt unreasonably pleased with herself, as the commander had deemed her attempts at coffee as "fit for human consumption" a few days before. Honestly, the asari still had no idea how one could tell good coffee from bad. Every brew or blend she'd tried thus far had tasted unpalatably bitter. Her single attempt on Thessia had left the commander choking and gasping. She had no idea what the commander found so appealing about the beverage, or how Denai had not only managed to learn how to brew it to Shepard's liking, but had even started drinking it herself.

It had taken nearly three weeks of testing her attempts on Joker before she'd been confidant enough to again offer coffee to Sarah. She's thanked the pilot for his assistance, but he'd replied that the view was payment enough.

She looked into the coffee cup she carried, wondering again what the pilot had found so appealing about the sight.

Liara placed Shepard's cup to the human's left, in the only space within easy reach of the commander that was free of scattered datapads. Liara confirmed the empty mess with a quick glance before quickly placing a kiss on the top of the human's head. Shepard never even looked up as Liara moved to sit next to her.

Liara took a moment to rearrange her own datapads, sorting between the pads containing data she'd already discounted, and those that might yet hold some relevance.

The crew had grown accustomed to the pair working in the mess. The tables allowed for Shepard's preference to spread her work across an open space, as well as permitted the couple to work together without spending what might be considered an inappropriate amount of time in each other's cabins.

Not that they were fooling anyone. Their relationship was no longer a secret by any reasonable definition of the word, but Shepard insisted on maintaining a display of professionalism and propriety aboard ship.

They'd been at it for hours now, constantly reviewing the data, trying to understand what they might have missed. Liara took a sip of her tea, and gently nudged the commander as she put down her own cup.

Sarah looked up in surprise, and Liara indicated the fresh coffee with a smile and a glance.

The commander flashed a look of gratitude as she reached for her mug, drinking deeply.

"Thanks Liara."

"Have you found anything new?" Liara this time indicating the pile of datapads spread across the table before them.

"Not for lack of trying." Shepard's frustration was obvious. "I don't think there's anything here to find."

Liara nodded, having reached the same conclusion nearly a day earlier. Drawing conclusions from incomplete data was something she'd done her entire career. In this case they'd reached what appeared to be the correct conclusion. They just had nothing to show for it.

"Nothing new anyway," Shepard repeated. "The data's incomplete, but I can't find anything wrong with the analysis. Stallura's team did an amazing job." She offered Liara a smile. "And you were able to dumb it down for the human."

"Shepard," Liara began. "All I did was…"

"Successfully point to a system on the galaxy map where we'd find geth," Shepard finished. "Each and every time. We found geth or proof of geth activity eight times in seven systems."

"But nothing in the last four days," reminded Liara.

"I think nearly four weeks of success earns you a pass," soothed Shepard. "Besides, even I can see the pattern now. The geth should be here, they just aren't."

"Stallura believes their activity is indicative of a search. It appears they are attempting to investigate as many systems as possible using the remainder of their forces."

Shepard nodded. "I read that in the report." She took another sip of coffee. "What we don't know is what they're searching for, or how many forces they have left. We destroyed a lot of geth at the Battle of the Citadel, but we have no idea how many remain on this side of the veil."

"Or if any are massing on the other side of it, ready to invade," added Liara seriously.

"We've been living with that possibility since the Geth War. I'm not going to take the Normandy through the veil unless we absolutely have to. There are just too many unknowns."

"It has been four days, Shepard. If we've lost the trail, what are we going to do now?" Asked Liara.

The commander sat quietly for a moment. "We're in the right place. You're sure of it, I'm sure of it, even Stallura's analysts are sure of it." She paused again. "What if we're early? We're searching for the geth, the geth are searching for… something. We have a stealth drive and they don't. Maybe they're just being cautious and we got here first?"

"So you suggest we wait?" A smile danced at the corners of Liara's lips. "Lieutenant Pressly will be elated with your decision."

"He is getting a little stir crazy, isn't he?" Chuckled the commander. "There are five planets in the Amada system, and who knows how many smallbodies. We give it another day or two, a really deep look. If we don't find anything we start working on the other systems in the cluster."

"Unless they are here, and they're just waiting for us to leave?" Mused Liara. "Even without a stealth drive, a geth ship doesn't need many of the other systems a ship full of organics does. If they're running cold, they could be harder to find."

The commander smiled, and Liara immediately knew it was because she'd said something foolish. Try as she might, her lack of experience in military matters was still evident in discussions regarding strategy and tactics.

"They don't need as many of the systems we do, that's true. But over ninety percent of the heat generated by any ship is going to be generated by the drive core. It doesn't matter if the crew is synthetic or organic." She continued when Liara took a breath to interject. "And they're probably not waiting for us to leave, either. Even though they don't have a stealth drive, we do. There's no way they have any idea where we are."

"And yet they are nowhere to be found." Liara paused for a moment, hesitant to speculate a second time. "Unless they have located what they are looking for? Perhaps they have already departed?"

Shepard shook her head slowly. "Not if they're looking for what I think they are."

Liara's tone turned from uncertain to exasperated. "You know what they are searching for?"

"Maybe?" Shepard responded slowly. She took a long breath before revealing her suspicion. "I think they're looking for the reapers. Maybe not all of them, not if they're truly in dark space. But at least another scout or 'vanguard'. They followed Sovereign through the veil into Citadel Space as if it were nothing. There had to be something in it for them. I think the geth are looking for the reapers, or at least whatever the reapers promised them to buy their allegiance."

"That could explain their behavior," Liara conceded. "But they are not here now."

"No, and we have those three missing ships to worry about as well."

The reminder got Liara's attention. "You believe the missing ships are a related occurrence? That whatever happened to them also happened to the geth?"

"I don't know what to think, Liara. It is possible that the Alliance ships ran into the geth."

"And the geth 'ran into' something else?"

"It makes about as much sense as something else happening to both the geth and the alliance ships." She finished her coffee, putting the mug back in the table in frustration. "There's something I'm missing, some piece to this puzzle that I'm not seeing." She looked to Liara for reassurance. "But I have no idea what it could be."

Liara put her hand on Shepard's arm for reassurance. "Shepard, I…"

Suddenly Joker's voice broke in over ship wide PA, "Brace for evasive maneuvers!" Joker's announcement was immediately followed by a sharp lurch to starboard, too extreme for the inertial dampeners to completely compensate for.

Liara was wide eyed, "Commander!" No 'Shepard', no 'Sarah', not now. Liara had been in battle many times, but always on the ground. The Normandy was home, was safety. Disorientation momentarily froze her in place.

The ship lurched again, this time harder, more violently. She was thrown against the bulkhead, narrowly missed by the chair she'd just vacated. When her eyes refocused it was on Shepard's hand, reaching down to her.

"Get up, Liara! Put on your hardsuit! Get to your station!"

Liara grabbed Shepard's hand as she staggered to her feet. 'Hardsuit. Station.' It took a moment for her rattled brain to make sense of the order, to remember her training.

Shepard waited until she nodded in understanding. "Aye aye, Commander." Liara turned and ran to the elevator, Shepard heading to her locker as she sought her own hardsuit.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

Liara had been gone less than two minutes, but it felt like hours to the panicked asari. She'd stripped in the elevator on the way to the cargo deck, ran to her locker for her hardsuit, and then put it on as the elevator returned to the crew deck. The pressure drills did what they were supposed to do however, and she was able to tune out the chaos around her as she suited up. She stepped out of the elevator fully encased in her armor, helmet in hand, ready for whatever Shepard needed of her.

Liara rounded the elevator into the crew area. The compartment she'd just left was now filled with roiling smoke. There were several small fires visible. Bare wires hung sparking from the ceiling.

She kneeled by a fallen crewman, checking for a pulse or respiration. Nothing. The lights flickered, urging her forward. 'Goddess be with you,' she mouthed silently as she left her fallen colleague behind on her way to the medbay, her duty station.

It was only when the medbay hatch failed to open that she began to wonder how severe the damage actually was, why she'd never heard a call to general quarters, and how badly they'd been hit.

Dr. Chakwas manually released the medbay hatch from the inside. The intense, yet calm demeanor radiated by the human doctor helped soothe Liara's nerves somewhat. "There's no power to the medbay, Liara. There's nothing we can do here."

"What do you need from me?" Liara tried to match Chakwas' composed tone even as she was nervously wringing her hands and shifting her weight from one foot to the other.

Chakwas heard the question behind the question. She put her hand on Liara's shoulder as she met the young asari's gaze. "I'm going to tend to the injured on this deck. Deck one is open to space. Jeff won't leave the cockpit, and anyone else who didn't make it into the pods are… lost." She waited until she saw understanding in Liara's eyes. "Go to Shepard, all right? Stay with her." At Liara's nod the doctor brushed past the asari in search of wounded crewmembers.

Liara hesitated for the briefest of moments as she processed. 'Find Shepard, find Shepard.' She turned her eyes from the retreating physician's back, and again looked around the compartment.

Shepard was nowhere to be seen.

She moved deeper into the compartment. Shepard's locker was standing open, empty. The commander's hardsuit was gone, her uniform and most of her weapons in a pile on the floor.

Liara stepped around the pile, her pace quickening with every stride. Her destination was the passageway that contained the sleeping pods, life support, and the main computer. From there perhaps she could

'Find Shepard,' "Shepard!"

Assess the ship's condition, and even determine where the commander was likely most needed.

She coughed as she ran up

"Shepard!"

the stairs and into the passageway.

Almost immediately she could discern a form in front of the

"Shepard!"

console of the main computer. The commander was activating the distress buoy as Liara came up being her, calling 'Shepard!' one last time as the human put on her helmet.

"The distress beacon is ready for launch," said the commander, Shepard's motion reminding Liara to put on her own helmet.

"Will the Alliance get here in time?" Liara wondered, not for the first time, why the Normandy didn't carry a Council distress buoy as well. Although the Alliance had demonstrated fewer misgivings than other races about demonstrations of force in the Terminus, it was likely that an asari or turian ship was closer than any Alliance vessel.

Liara was yanked back to the moment as the ship lurched again, causing her to stumble forward into Shepard's arms.

The commander steadied her before reaching for a fire suppressor. "The Alliance won't abandon us."

Liara focused on the steel in commander's voice even as she caught the suppressor that the commander turned and tossed her.

"We just need to hold on. Get everyone into the escape pods."

Not everyone was going to make it to their escape pod, Liara knew. "Joker's still in the cockpit, he won't evacuate." She turned to give the commander a meaningful glance that was invisible through her helmet. "I'm not leaving either."

Shepard came over and pulled the fire suppressor out of Liara's hands. "I need you to get the crew into the escape pods. I'll take care of Joker." The commander started down the corridor.

Liara watched as the human walked away. Her feet were rooted to the deck. Her arms loose at her sides. "Shepard…" 'Shepard, don't leave.'

Shepard looked over her shoulder one last time. "Liara go! Now!"

"Aye, aye." She turned and ran.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

Liara ran with everything she had, stopping in front of one of the few remaining pods.

She spun at the entrance, turning to call to those behind her. "Everybody in! Go, go, go!" Her suit speakers added some needed volume to her voice even if it did nothing for the fear she could hear in her tone.

Dr. Chakwas made it safely aboard the pod Liara had stationed herself in front of, causing Liara to sigh in relief. Two additional crewmen followed the doctor into the pod before another explosion killed a third. The explosion effectively blocked the path of any other crew who might still be trying to reach the evacuation station, as well as prevented Liara from being able to search for other survivors.

Reluctantly Liara entered the pod herself, lamenting the unfilled seats. The hatch slammed shut as she pulled the restraint bar down over herself. Seconds later the force of the ejection slammed her sideways, the pod being far too small for a mass effect core, and a corresponding inertial dampening system.

Liara was counting the seconds, waiting to hear Shepard's voice. The commander would rescue Joker, Liara knew she would. Shepard never failed at anything. Even if she ended up having to throw the pilot over her shoulder, she'd get them both into the escape pod behind the cockpit.

The asari shook her head. She recognized that she wasn't thinking clearly yet, still operating under her body's reaction to stress, fear, and anxiety. Despite that, she was unable to come up with a reason that Shepard had needed to collect Joker at all. Why had the man not obeyed the evacuation order? More importantly, what was taking Sheaprd so long?

She looked around the pod, trying to distract herself for a moment. Chakwas was holding a bandage to the forehead of the man next to her, but his wound seemed superficial. Two seats taken opposite her, with a crewman seated on her left and right. Five survivors then, in a pod meant for eight.

She turned on her external speaker. "Is everyone all right?" Four nods in response. Good. She gave a human style thumbs up in acknowledgement. Shepard would have wanted her to take control, to maintain control. Would have wanted her to focus on the survivors, not on those left behind. Well, for now at any rate. If anything, Shepard would likely need her help later, when she tried to come to terms with those they'd lost. The commander still wasn't over losing Ashley. This was going to tear her apart.

The quick assessment helped get her mind off the group's predicament. Their attackers didn't seem interested the escape pods. That meant they were probably safe for the moment. Not that she could do much about it if they weren't. The pods had minimal maneuverability, and a distress signal that couldn't be deactivated. They were in no position to run or hide if the mystery cruiser decided to finish them off.

Thoughts of the enemy cruiser snapped her disoriented mind back to Shepard. The mystery ship continued to circle back, taking random shots at the Normandy as it passed. Still no signal from the lone unlaunched escape pod, the one on the bridge. Liara tried not to focus on what that meant, that likely no one on the bridge or CIC had been alive to use it.

One more pass of the cruiser. Firing. Severing the cockpit from the rest of the ship. Liara was on the verge of crying out when miraculously, the final pod's distress signal went active. Liara sank into her seat, practically sobbing in relief.

Then Shepard's hardsuit beacon activated as well.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

It took a moment for Liara to realize what the additional signal was, what it meant.

The beacon's activation indicated that Shepard's hardsuit was exposed to vacuum. Something had happened. The pod must have been breached, or its life support system had failed.

'Poor Joker,' she thought. At least Shepard had seen to her own pressure status. Just like Liara would be the only one to survive a pressure integrity issue on her own pod, Shepard would be the only survivor on hers. 'Poor Shepard,' was the next thought to enter her mind. For the commander to have to watch Joker decompress… it would be a horrible experience.

Liara was overcome with the desire to help, to comfort. She did the only thing she could think of, and that was try to reach out to Sarah. The link between them was stronger than many, she knew. She'd heard the occasional comment back at the estate. Saw the looks when Shepard would anticipate her mood, or finish one of her sentences. They'd melded just this morning. Shepard's essence, her uniqueness, was still strong in her mind, and Liara reached out for it.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

Her vision went black as the pod and her companions faded from view. She opened her mind's eye, expecting the vistas of Shepard's mind. The familiar surroundings were distorted, muted. Liara pushed harder, thinking the distance was the problem.

Something was wrong. The connection was there, but she couldn't sense Sarah. Colors were greyed, sounds were muffled. Was Shepard… asleep? Liara refused to allow her self to see another alternative.

She turned, looking around her in the altered landscape.

Familiar sights pushed forward. Shepard on Mindoir, meeting with Maître Marchand. The human's proud smile at their victory. Another moment, Sarah in bed with her, touching her, complimenting her, holding her after an eventful day.

She was blown back into her seat as if struck. She put her hand to her helmet, shocked by the sharp pain in her head. The pain was receding quickly. Perhaps it wasn't hers? She reached out tentatively to find that their connection was still active.

*Shepard?*

'Liara…' Faint, as if from a great distance.

Liara dove in again, more deeply this time. Shepard was there and she needed her help.

Again she faced the strangely altered landscape, but this time the memories were different.

They were still on Mindoir, and this time she could see herself through Shepard's eyes. Nothing unusual there, this was a common occurrence in the meld. One, she didn't mind admitting to herself, that usually left her with a fairly significant bump in her self esteem.

This time was different. Again, the colors were muted, but Shepard seemed to be clinging to her image with a peculiar intensity. They were at the party before leaving for Thessia. She was telling Shepard to go clean up, but this time Shepard wouldn't go. She stood there, unwilling to leave, rooted to the spot as if terrified. Her perspective changed and she could see Sarah. Her eyes were wide, panic obvious in her demeanor. Liara reached out to brush the dirt from the human's face…

This time she was hurled forward against her restraint. The pain had been stronger this time, but it had definitely come from Shepard. Liara felt it across the link like a spike driven into her flesh, or an electric shock. The pain was all encompassing.

Something was horribly wrong.

For the third time she strengthened their joining, and this time she could sense the human, actually feel her, not just the memories.

*Shepard?* Less tentatively than last time.

She could hear Sarah's thoughts, even though they weren't directed at her.

'At least I won't die choking.' The words weren't clear, as if Shepard were drunk or otherwise slightly incoherent. She caught other words like 'hyperventilate', 'nitrogen', and 'cortical stimulation', but nothing that seemed to form a coherent sentence.

Abruptly Shepard seemed to become aware of her presence. Finally! She saw her own pod in the distance through Shepard's eyes.

Wait.

Shepard could see her pod?

Oh no.

.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.o0o.

*Nonononononononononono*

This time Liara held nothing back, throwing everything she could across the link, into their connection. She dove as deeply into the human's mind as she could.

'Liara…' Shepard's response was languid, sluggish.

*Shepard, listen to me. You have to tell me what's wrong.*

'Liara…' Not really a response. More of a mantra now.

*Shepard.* Liara's tone allowed for nothing but obedience. *I'm going to help you, but I need to know what to do.*

'1. 2. 3. 4.' Came the ominous answer.

*Shepard!* Liara screamed across the link.

That seemed to generate a response, at least. Wordlessly Shepard reached out to her, held her essence, consoled it.

*Shepard, no.* Sobbing now, Liara could feel what was coming, knew what the effort was costing the commander.

Liara was suddenly overwhelmed with Shepard's love. Sarah cherished her to a level that the young asari wouldn't have believed possible. Liara could feel the raw emotion pouring from the commander. The adoration, the affection, the idolization. Every bit of it directed to Liara, while maintaining a wall between her and the majority of the pain the human was enduring.

When Shepard knew that Liara had received all the comfort she could offer, she started drawing back, leaving Liara alone in her own mind.

*No!* Desperate again, Liara dove further into the link, even as it began to unravel.

*Shepard!* She could feel Sarah pulling away from her, faster than she could follow.

*Sarah!* Now she could feel the human's mind beginning to shut down around her. Higher consciousness already disintegrating, she began to feel the failure of Shepard's autonomous functions in her own body as she choked and seized.

She was entirely unaware of her podmates panicking around her, as they tried to understand what was happening, what was wrong,

It didn't matter. She maintained the meld even when there was nothing left to connect to. She cast about, desperately seeking any remnant of the commander. A feeling, a memory, anything.

She left almost nothing of herself in her body as she pushed herself further into the unknown. Her bondmate (truly her bondmate, she knew that now) had to be out there, and she would find her.

A shout brought her back to the pod against her will. Her helmet off, she found herself staring into the eyes of a concerned Dr. Chakwas.

But Chakwas wasn't the human she sought, the human she needed. She pulled her face away from the doctor's hands, as she thrashed against the locked restraint.

Shepard was out there, somewhere. She would find her. Find her bondmate, find the more important half of herself.

She would search until her own final breath. Until there was nothing left of her to do so. She would hunt for Shepard until she found her, saved her. She knew it was hopeless, but she didn't care, didn't stop. The search was all she knew, all she was.

Shepard would return to her, hale and whole. She had to. The search could end no other way.

Until it did. The last of the young scientist's efforts ended under the influence of Chakwas' drugs.

Liara would be reeled in, returned to companions and colleagues. She would be delivered to the care of friends and family, to recover and heal.

But of her own sanity, she would find only fragments.

Notes:

And so ends Fragments, 22 months and 140,000 words later (much longer than I intended by either measure).

Yes, I've known the final word of this chapter for two and a half years (since Obligations). It's been a painful wait!

Fragments is by far the longest segment of the Cari'ssi'mi saga, which is now a little under 285,000 words in both series.

For those confused by the ending, this was Liara's POV for the equivalent scenes at the end of chapters 19, 20, 22, and "Heartbeat" in "Cari'ssi'mi Drabbles". That means that from Shepard's POV what we've been seeing are her flashbacks as she suffocates since Chapter 19. "Secrets" in "Cari'ssi'mi Drabbles" is a tie-in to this chapter as well.

Cari'ssi'mi continues in "Asunder"

Assumptions here include:

FemShep/Liara
Post ME1 ending - after the Battle of the Citadel, technically before the beginning of ME2 (but not for much longer)

Shepard is:
Colonist / Vanguard / War Hero

As always, feedback is welcome and desired.