Warning : Tsuna's molesting. Crying Ienari. Inceessssst ( author's guilty pleasure ). Incest. Incest. Incest. INCEST. Inappropriate touching. Perverted side of Tsuna. Unedited.

Title : Please Don't Let Reborn Know I Have A Brother

Chapter 4 : Noooooooooo

Ienari wasn't hyperventilating.

He was fucking wheezing his lungs out in fear and despair.

The doorbell rang for the second time, followed by a voice eerily similar to his own, calling his god-forsaken nickname.

"Nacchan!"

Ienari's brain screamed in panic as he cleaned the place in under five seconds before dashing up to his room faster than his record speed in Reborn's 'bullet dodging' training.

Quick! Change into something difficult to be removed!

Ienari rushed to his clothing cupboard and searched for the tightest pants and most number of buttons shirt. To be safe, he added an extra layer of hoodie which he zipped up all the way to the top.

If he had a chastity belt, he would gladly wear it.

For the sake of his innocence and purity, nothing is ridiculous.

"Nacchan~!"

Oh shit. The demon's voice could be heard from the stairs, footsteps slowly getting louder as 'it' took each step closer towards Ienari's room.

Ienari screamed.

With added strength of his dying will, Ienari pushed his desk to block his bedroom door. Feeling that it wasn't enough, he pushed whatever else pushable to strengthen the barricade. He then grabbed his blanket and wrapped himself in it, pretending to be asleep.

Maybe if he believed hard enough, his brother would go away.

"Nacchan~"

Or not.

Ienari had never screamed so hard in his poor life.

There it was - the abomination called Tsunayoshi, suddenly wrapped inside of the blanket with him. Ienari didn't even hear the door open!

Tsuna…

'… Why must Tsuna be here…?'

"N-Nii-sama…" Ienari forced a smile. "What are you doing here?"

Tsuna laughed. He couldn't handle how cute his brother was! And wow had Ienari grown into such a cutie. Those ass would be so hot given a few years. Hopefully not literally.

Then again, it would be very amusing to watch his twin's ass on fire. He could arrange an event which could lead to one ass burning incident while making it look like an accident.

Yes. It certainly could be arranged.

"I thought you were lonely without me! So I stopped our little game of hide-and-seek for an indefinite amount of time!" The nightmare pouted. "I'm starting to think you're not even trying to find me at all… So cruel to keep me waiting, Nacchan."

'AS IF I WOULD WILLINGLY GO AND FIND YOU!' Ienari cried in his head.

"So… Nacchan…~"

Oh fuck no.

One of the many, many things Ienari hated about his brother was the almost 'irrefutable' perverted side of his brother. It was a wonder how Ienari managed to keep his virginity intact after so many advances his brother made on him. Even more of a miracle that he still have his first kiss saved for, hopefully, someone special.

And when the hell did all the zips and buttons on his shirt and hoodie got undone?

"W-Wait, Nii-sama!"

"Na…ccchan…"

The Vongola boss felt a hand sliding up his torso, brushing dangerously close to his nipple. Another hand not his own worked on the buckle of his belt.

Danger. Danger. Danger.

"Nii-sama… What are you…"

Tsuna flipped them both over so that Ienari was the one straddling him, hips bucking onto each other. The blanket had long been forgotten after getting tossed to the side.

Gosh. Ienari felt like a pervert. His heart sped up at the flushed look on Tsuna's face, his own mirrored his twin.

"You've grown so big, Nacchan…"

That sounded so wrong…

"Nii-sama…"

Yet it felt so righ-

Whoa. No. No. No. No.

Time out.

Ienari tried to push Tsuna away, but he had no strength to fight back, not when the horrifying pleasuring touch of his brother draining every ounce of his control.

Tsuna snaked his arms around the other's neck, slowly pulling him for a kiss on the side of his nape. Ienari managed to pull away before those dangerous lips claim his skin. Tsuna changed target, nipping at his brother's ear.

"Nii-sama… You can't… Ah…!"

"You used to be ticklish here…" Tsuna whispered. "I guess age changed that. Hormones are oh so terrifying, ne?"

Damn. Had Tsuna's voice always been that… sexy…?

"N-Nii-sama… Please… I… I can't…"

"What the hell is going on?"

.

Though Enma managed to overpower them initially, he felt himself getting weaker when both Simon's and Vongola's guardians worked together to free themselves. His concentration finally broke when Reborn shot him with a tranquilizer. The guardians all crash-landed on each other. Being held high up in the air does that to you.

Reborn being Reborn despised having things hidden from him, especially when it has something to do with his own student. He had to admit, it hurt when Ienari didn't trust him enough to let him stay by his side.

A weakness Reborn foolishly held on to.

Angry shouts of protests, blaming, and 'EXTREMES' didn't help his patience. So he added a warning shot in the mix of chaos, which was all it took to shut everyone up.

"Dame-Ie's guardians. Back to the house. Now."

The vongola guardians nodded in unison, then by their own weird method, rushed back to the house they were escorted out just minutes before, leaving the Simon guardians to tend to their fallen boss.

Hayato was hysterical. Takeshi's smile was missing from its usual spot on his face. So even Ienari's two best friends didn't know what happened to their sky.

Oh how they never would've expected the sight they would find behind the barricaded door of Ienari's bedroom.

.

Thank goodness Maman was out, or she would be upset by the total destruction they were causing.

Hayato panicked when he couldn't open the bedroom door. Shy, sweet Chrome who had a little more common sense than the others used a layer of illusion to cancel the noises their chaos made, making sure bossu didn't hear their arrival. Mukuro's vines cleared the barricade from inside.

Of course, Reborn was the first to go inside. Fuck if anything happens to his Ienar-

"You can't… ah…!" Ienari moaned loud and clear for everyone to hear.

The guardians froze.

There on the floor, clothing unbuttoned, hair disheveled, face red and panting, their beloved boss was straddling… a clone?

What the fuck.

Nobody dared to say anything, too busy trying to process what they were witnessing.

The 'other' Ienari whispered something inaudible as he pulled the 'other-other'(?) Ienari ( it was difficult to know who is who/what when they both looked exactly the same ) down for what seemed to be a deep kiss. So close. Oh, so close to each other's lips, almost there.

Hayato fainted. Ryohei, for once, fell quiet. Mukuro covered Chrome's eyes. Fortunately, Bianchi took the kids somewhere else while Reborn and the others make sure the house was safe to return to.

"N-Nii-sama…-"

'Nii-sama'?!

"Please… I… I can't…" Ienari ( Ienari? ) panted.

A hairline before lips touched, Reborn lost it.

"What the hell is going on?"

Both brunets snapped their heads towards the voice. The one on top blushed impossibly red as he stuttered sentences of uninterpretable shit while the bottom one smirked.

The air tense and awkward. Teenagers stared at a very un-innocent scene played by their supposed-to-be innocent and naive boss. ( after all, they tried so hard to keep him innocent, going as far as to lie about where babies come from, censoring his books and TV, prying him away from anything remotely related to anything sexual ). Reborn's question was left ignored when the bottom brunet sat up while the other was still on top of him, effectively pressing their groins together.

Reborn felt the strong need to murder someone.

Jealousy is a dangerous thing.

Good ol' Takeshi was the one to crack the silence with a very casual statement.

"When the teacher talked about binary fission, I never thought it would be like this?"

Mukuro stared at Takeshi as if he was the biggest idiot in the world. The illusionist tried so hard to make his face appear stoic, but the pain was too much.

The bottom Ienari, the one with the smirk, the slightly sinister-looking one giggled, sending chills down everyone's spine.

That was the moment they all knew they're fucked.

"You didn't tell me you have guests, Nacchan~"

"B-But I didn't know you were coming!"

"Haha. Well, you know I love taking you by surprise, especially from behind."

Ienari was sooooo screwed ( a literal possibility in the near future, but he prayed not ). With most of his guardians and tutor watching, the unfortunate boss-in-training could only cry as always, as it was the only thing he could do when those perverted hands wrapped tightly around him.

The rest pretended they heard nothing.

"So…, are you going to introduce them to me, Nacchan?"

"ABSOLUTELY NOT."

"Boo… Then I'll start!"

Tsuna finally released Ienari and stood straight with his hands folded behind him, nodding a small bow as a polite courtesy.

"It's a pleasure to meet you all. I'm Sawashiro Tsunayoshi."

Ah.

That explained everything… NOT.

'SINCE WHEN DID IENARI HAVE A BROTHER?!'

There were no pictures, records, or anything to prove the existence of a 'brother'. Reborn ( who really wanted the brother by 'blood' to exist, but now, not really ) never found any evidence of another Sawada in the family bloodline, and now one had presented itself on a silver platter. How lucky.

"Wait." Who else but Reborn noticed the obvious difference first. "Sawashiro?"

"Ah… That…" Tsuna said in a cold tone. He seemed to be remembering a bitter memory.

Yes. He remembered the day Byakuran came home with a 'legit' wedding certificate ( Tsu-chan, I copied your signature! / How?! / Love. ), two wedding wings, and official papers stating their changed names by marriage, all when Tsuna was only four years old. How Byakuran pulled the required strings remained a mystery to the brunet. ( Tsu-chan, I still have bits of knowledge from other parallels, so of course I'm going to abuse it. / Byakuran. We're kids. / We're both kids, and we're both mentally old as fuck, so it doesn't really count as pedophilia? Details. / THAT'S NOT THE POINT. WHY ARE WE MARRIED? WHICH IDIOT ALLOWED THIS? )

Months later, those rings became their 'pacifiers'. Tsuna stopped complaining since.

"That's a story for another time." Tsuna smiled. The others saw how eerily same that smile was to Ienari's.

Heck, the both looked exactly the same. Not a hair out of place.

"Ahaha! I'm Yamamoto Takeshi! It's nice to meet you, Tsuna!"

The other guardians were baffled by how quick the rain befriended a stranger, and already giving nicknames too!

"EXTREME! I HAVE TWO LITTLE BROS!"

Tsuna laughed. The sun always shone the brightest.

"Then I'm happy to have another big brother, onii-chan!"

Ienari was horrified. Ryohei had no idea what he just did, what he had signed himself to.

"Bossu's brother?" Chrome voice came out as a soft, sweet whisper. Her eyes still covered by Mukuro's hands. "Mukuro-sama. I want to see."

Mukuro reluctantly let go.

Purple eyes met brown, gaze locked in an odd tune of synchronization, an invisible bond of understanding. Somehow, Chrome felt as if she had met the 'brother' before. The way brown eyes stared at her was different than Ienari's kind and warm ones. The 'brother', Tsuna's were hiding something, yet trying to break out of silence.

A tearless, soundless cry.

"Your eyes are pretty." Tsuna said to Chrome, which made her blush.

To the others, it was a straightforward flirt on their only female guardian, thus assuming ( if the previous ordeal with Ienari wasn't enough ) that Tsuna was somewhat a pervert.

But Tsuna knew better.

Those were one of the rare times he appreciated receiving the other Tsunayoshi's memories, too glad to intervene fate when needed. Just in time.

"Kufufu. I appreciate it if you don't touch what's mine, Tsunayoshi-kun."

"Don't worry. I already have Nacchan for that. Right, Nacchan?"

"Please don't touch me, Nii-sama. Ever."

"Yet you liked it when I put my hand in your-"

"Oh MY GOD. NO."

As expected, Tsuna only laughed, blatantly enjoying how red Nacchan's face can get with a little teasing. For extra effect, he skipped to his brother's side and hugged him tightly, bodies once again pressed together. A tiny squeal escaped his lips when Ienari's body stiffened at the contact.

"I love you so much, my dear brother!"

Takeshi restrained Reborn from going on a shooting rampage.

"Hey, Nacchan… Later tonight, can we…"

"THEY HAVEN'T EVEN DONE INTRODUCING THEMSELVES AND YOU'RE ALREADY ASKING FOR SOMETHING IMPOSSIBL-"

"It's not impossible. I packed lube before coming here-"

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT. I'VE-"

Tsuna 'accidentally' touched a sensitive spot, at least that was what everyone wanted to believe. Ienari whimpered pathetically as he tried to keep his legs from getting too noodle-y. A rather erotic gasp resonated in the room.

What has been heard cannot be unheard.

No hole would be big enough to hide his shame and embarrassment Ienari felt. He silently prayed for something… anything at all to change the situation he was in. Now that his important people knew of the secret he kept for so long, nothing else mattered.

Done. So, so done with shit.

Ienari slumped onto his brother, body giving in to exhaustion. Tsuna readily caught his brother's fallen form.

"I give up… Do as you like…" said Ienari in a lifeless voice. "But please kill me after you're done…"

Again with the laughing. The guardians swore they would have nightmares the next time they sleep. They could do nothing but stare as the perverted one snuggled into the crook of their precious boss' neck.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Nacchan. I love you too much."

"Lies…" Ienari whimpered.

He remembered all the hell Tsuna put him through all those years ago. When Reborn came into his life and started the so-called 'spartan training', Ienari only laughed, saying that it was nothing compared to what he had been through in the past, which he still refused to say anything about.

When they were kids, Tsuna always said that it wouldn't hurt.

Yet, it hurt. A lot. Especially when it involves rocks, very pointy rocks, fire, heated iron, ropes, pencil, cotton candies, and many other things down the list. Heck, everything Tsuna touches automatically became hazardous mentally and physically.

Tsuna = Pain and suffering.

"Lies…" Ienari repeated. "I hate you so much, Nii-sama…"

The shock, along with the frustration and despair of Tsuna visiting again were too much for poor Ienari to handle. The exhaustion of having his 'Tsuna senses' distorting his grasp on reality for the past few days finally caught up to him. He passed out in his literal nightmare's arms.

"Whoopsies. Looks like Nacchan is too tired to play tonight. I brought toys too…"

Tsuna laid his brother on the ground and began rearranging the room while the others just watched. Everything was too weird too comprehend. Was he even real?

"Ah. Perhaps you guys want to play with me instead?"

"No." they all said at the same time, except for Hayato who was still out cold on the floor, and Takeshi who stupidly said 'yes'.

Reborn commented, "You don't have any idea what kind of game he's talking about, do you…"

"Haha. Nope."

Idiot.

"But I want to know more about Tsuna. Ienari never told us anything about his brother."

"Those who are not in the game won't know of my connection with Nacchan." Tsuna said as he arranged Ienari's bed. Sleeping on the floor couldn't be comfortable. Nacchan might have a backache in the morning.

Roborn took an interest in Tsuna's choice of words.

'Game'.

What could that mean?

"Let me deal with this. Take everyone else back home and make sure no one is listening." Reborn ordered the guardian currently with the most brain cells, which Mukuro immediately nodded while the others had looks of confusion on their faces.

"I expect some kind of exchange, arcobaleno." Mukuro materialized his signature weapon and pierced the ground beneath him. Illusionary sleeping gas knocked the rest of the guardians to sleep. "I want to know if I can possess the other one instead."

"Omerta…" Reborn warned. Mukuro shouldn't have said anything in front of the civilian twin of Vongola Decimo lest he wanted another imprisonment.

"Fine. Fine. Odd how you gladly dragged two innocent schoolgirls down, but kept this one," Mukuro pointed to Tsuna with his trident, "out of the loop. As Ienari's brother, it's impossible."

With one last swing of his trident, Mukuro disappeared along with all those who were unconscious in a swirl of blinding mist. Tsuna clapped his hands, amazed at the surreal magic trick performed by the pineapple one.

"That was amazing! It looked so real!" Tsuna chirped, eyes sparkled in childlike delight. "Where did they go? I didn't get to know all of their names yet."

"They'll be back tomorrow."

'Besides. They refuse to leave their sky unattended for too long.'

"Enough about them. Tell me more about yourself, Dame-Tsuna."

Tsuna's eyes widened at the name. Reborn did the same. The hitman didn't mean to call the other Sawada he knew nothing about 'Dame', but somehow, the name rolled nicely on his tongue. It felt unnaturally natural.

He liked it.

So he was going to keep it.

"Dame-Tsuna." Reborn repeated. Tsuna creepily smiled at that.

"Well. As you can see, I am Nacchan's identical twin brother. Seven minutes apart. I run a tiny bakery in- Ah! I'm not supposed to reveal it since nacchan and I are still playing. Can't have you giving clues, ne?"

"…"

"What else… I like cakes. I hate paperworks. My number is 27. I live with another guy but that's also a story for another time. Oh! Nacchan said I'm a sadist, but I don't think so? Hahaha!"

Judging by the way Ienari acted, Reborn saw the light in that claim. He himself couldn't get any sort of extreme reaction out of the young Vongola boss no matter what extreme situation he pushed Ienari into, and here Tsuna was, terrifying the poor soul with his mere presence.

How did the brother sparked so much fear in one of the strongest people in the world? Reborn just had to wait and see.

Tsuna abandoned his brother's side in favor of picking up the infant. Reborn noticed how gentle Tsuna was.

A bit too gentle.

When skin touched skin, in comparison to Ienari, the first difference Reborn noted was how hot Tsuna was. Literally. Ienari's average body temperature had always been 38.8°C. Tsuna's could possibly be higher than 40.

Then there was that split second jolt Reborn felt in his chest. All of a sudden, the pacifier around his neck weighed a little heavier, though not in a literal sense.

"What is your name, little guy?" the brunet asked. His smile softened when it was just the two of them ( the unconscious didn't count ) in the room.

"I am Ienari's home-tutor, Reborn!"

"Home-tutor? Then you must be very smart!"

"…"

Reborn remembered the first time he met Ienari. Ienari's reaction wasn't the most welcoming. Heck, Ienari's intuition immediately kicked in, painfully weighing at the idea that the 'home-tutor' wasn't really an infant.

Did Tsuna suspected anything? Or did he not inherit the same hyper intuition Ienari had?

"So how did my brother do in school? I hope he's behaving well when I was away."

"He's a genius." Reborn admitted. "But for some incomprehensible reason, he never give it his all, unless things are on the line."

"Oh? Mind elaborate, Reborn-chan?" Tsuna sweetly asked, which made the great Reborn shiver in disgust.

"He wouldn't bother unless it involves something or someone he cares deeply for. If we forced him to do something he deems unworthy of his attention, he would violently retaliate."

'In fear.' Reborn wanted to complete the sentence. Simply revealing too much would be too rash. Leaving out details would be too suspicious. He had specific orders as to what actions to take when dealing with potential allies and civilians, but a civilian brother?

Being the blood brother to the heir destroyed the poor lad's clean future. A life tied to bloodshed and suffering was inevitable, unless orders were given, in which Vongola prepared none.

For the time being, Reborn would be on standby until further instructions. It was bad enough with Xanxus' case.

Tsuna pondered at Reborn's words, eyebrows knitted in a fit of concentration before he shrugged it away like it was nothing.

"Mmmhmm. That doesn't sound too healthy, but I guess I can understand why Nacchan is like that."

Especially when it was partially his fault Ienari acted so selective.

Reborn briefly caught the guilt in Tsuna's eyes, but it was gone as soon as it appeared. The hitman wanted to manipulate and bend the brunet like how he did to many others ( dragging Kyoko and Haru into the underworld ), but his hitman instincts strongly insisted that the teen holding him was someone nobody wanted to or should get involved with, be it the normal world or the dark side.

"Anyway, Reborn-chan. I really need to unpack my bags. Do you mind if I leave you two alone for a bit?"

"Sure."

Not like Reborn knew what else to say. A lot of things happened that night, and the fatigue was catching up to him.

A tiny part of him wanted to ask Tsuna what he would do if Ienari was awake. Would he be 'playing' instead of unpacking? Reborn scratched that question out of his range of humor after seconds of internal debate.

"Fantastic!" Tsuna gently tucked Reborn in bed beside Ienari. The orange blanket appeared out of nowhere, almost like magic. "I'll call mom and tell her I'm home. Then I have a whole basement to clean."

"Basement?" Reborn didn't know the Sawada residence have a basement. Yet another surprise to add in the mix.

Sawashiro Tsunayoshi was a bundle of surprise, one revelation after another.

"Yeah. When we were 8, Nacchan cried whenever I was in the same room as him, so we had to move rooms. I asked mom if I can make an underground secret chamber-… Wait…" Tsuna pouted as if trying to sort his thoughts out. "Come to think of it, I wonder why Nacchan cried? Maybe my tutoring sessions were a bit too extreme? Or was it the games?"

Reborn decided not to ask, reserving the question for another time.

For the time being, he needed to discretely bring Bianchi and the kids back to the house without having a carbon copy of Ienari terrorizing them.

The guardians needed a meeting to adapt to the sudden twist of event in their regular and 'totally normal' life in the mafia.

Iemitsu needed a few rounds of ammo through the head for being an idiot. What the fuck was he thinking, hiding another legitimate heir like that? Vongola's power balance was already weak to begin with. They couldn't afford to make room for another heir.

'Sigh.'

"You and Baka-Ie have a lot of explaining to do tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?"

"What's wrong, Dame-Tsuna? Hiding something?"

"Nothing… It's just… Nacchan and I are going on a date tomorrow! Ah. But he didn't know that yet. I want to surprise him first thing in the morning!"

"…"

.

Extra ( 1 / 3 ) :

42 seconds.

Fourty-fucking-two seconds, Byakuran looked away from his dear Tsunayoshi to answer a phonecall from a satisfied customer.

Then Tsuna suddenly disappeared, leaving only a 'Visit Nacchan. Brb.' note tucked under a marshmallow ( Sorry, Tsu-chan, but not even this can make up to it! ) cupcake.

Tsuna's 'brb' could last for a few hours to several months. Usually months. No letters. No phonecalls. Nothing. Not even a text message.

Byakuran locked everything in their little bakery, packed his bags and flew out of the window. He needed to find Tsuna, especially when it was almost time for the cursed rainbow arch to begin, seeing that they're both connected to the current sky arcobaleno.

Fuck anyone who saw him flying.

'AN ANGEL SPOTTED' would make the local newspaper a little less boring.

…

Extra ( 2 / 3 ) :

Aria leaned against the balcony fence with Yuni, both looking at the sunset.

"Will you be free soon?" Yuni asked. Her childlike innocence shone bright in her eyes.

"Now, now, Yuni." Aria patted her daughter's head. A fond smile played on her lips. "You know I don't understand your cryptic words. And it doesn't help that I can't see any future with you or your two friends in it."

"Of course you don't, mommy! Only Tsu-chan and Byaku-chan know! And only Tsu-chan, Byaku-chan, and I know! The Trinity Sky will always be together forever!"

Aria was glad Yuni grew up in a bloodless childhood, all thanks to the two mysterious skies known as 'Tsu-chan' and 'Byaku-chan'. She foresaw her own death which was due a little more than one year ago. But ever since Tsu-chan and Byaku-chan came into her life, her visions were all… off track, as if those two did something to change fate.

She had a lot of questions regarding the two skies.

Who were they?

What did they want?

Why did they seek Yuni out?

And the biggest question of them all… What in the world did they do to change fate so much that even deaths were defied?

"Hey, Yuni…" Aria called as she picked Yuni up. "You sure you don't want to tell me who Byaku-chan and Tsu-chan are?"

"Yup! Tsu-chan and Byaku-chan are mine, and I am theirs! Not yours! Besides, you already have Gamma."

"What."

"When are you getting married?"

"M-Married?"

"I want another sister. Hurry up and-"

"Yuni!" Aria couldn't stop her face from going red. "Where did you learn all of these things?"

"Tsu-chan and Byaku-chan~!"

Figures.

"And you know, mommy? Tsu-chan said you and Gamma's wedding would be soon, once one-third of the chains disappear! Then nothing can hold you down, ne?"

"I'm not getting married, Yuni. Mommy's too busy with-"

"Tsu-chan said the ship will sail, so the ship will sail." Yuni stubbornly said.

Aria didn't understand a single thing Yuni said afterwards, something about ships and rainbows and un-rainbows? At least Yuni's innocent passion for 'ships' wouldn't be of harm to anyone.

Besides… how dangerous can ships be?

…

Extra ( 3 / 3 ) :

Before he strolled into the Sawada residence to visit his adorable Nacchan, Tsuna stood on the welcome mat of the entryway, breathing in and out to ease his nerves. He knew that as much as Ienari was afraid of him, he was equally terrified.

One careless move, and everything would be over.

All he had to do was to keep himself under control. No depressing thoughts. Don't let psychosis win.

Sparks of inky black swirled in the stone of his ring.

No.

No.

Don't.

He would be fine.

Tsuna breathed out through his mouth, prepping himself for a proper reunion.

He would be fine…

Putting all effort into one big smile, he knocked loudly on the front door of his childhood house.

"Nacchan~!"

To Be Continued

...

What if… ( 1 / 1 ) : Chrome didn't cancel the sound all the way through and Hibari woke up during Tsuna's introduction?

The guardians stared in shock at the rather unholy ( and guiltily erotic ) sight of their boss, and even more so at what Hibari Kyoya did after the prefect entered the room through the window.

"H-Hibari-san…" Ienari slowly started. He was sure the cloud guardian was sleeping on their rooftop seconds ago. His intuition hummed in agreement. "Umm… Why did you give me these…?"

Tsuna stared at two wrapped condoms the black-haired teen threw at Ienari. He blinked and blinked before smirking. The Kyoya of this world was more generous than the other Tsunayoshi's Kyoya, and possibly a bit kinky too.

"Protection." Kyoya cooly said.

"But why." Ienari dared ask.

"Doing it is fine, but I don't want any Nami-chuu students getting pregnant under my watch."

"But Hibari-san. I'm a guy."

"Details."

"… Why do you even have these…?"

"Details."

"… Why did you give me two?"

"In case you want to switch roles with your partner mid way."

Tsuna decided to intervene, but not for the better. "Hmm. I guess it would be refreshing if Nacchan tops me once in a while. How about it, Nacchan?"

"NO."

Chaos soon erupted, or in a more precise description, violence caused by failure of their brain rebooting. The only people sane enough to not add oil to the fire was surprisingly the three most violent people in the room - Reborn, Mukuro, and Kyoya.

Reborn watched the copy mentally scarring the guardians with very graphic descriptions of what kind of games he and Nacchan would do. He had to admit, while he was jealous of someone else inappropriately touching the light of his life, it would be a waste of good mayhem to simply stop it all.

So he allowed the world to burn just a bit longer…

… all the while with a video camera in his hand.

Mukuro sighed. He didn't remember signing up to babysitting a group of overgrown babies. He remembered attacking Sawada Ienari, had his ass dragged back to Vendicare, struct a deal with Vongola, made the mist arcobaleno explode in the ring battle, had a bunch of memories from the future transferred to him, possessed by an ancient ghost…

Where did things go wrong?

He planned on staying on the 'sane' side of the group for as long as possible, but fuck it.

If the others are crazy, he had the rights to be just as impulsive and insane.

"If you don't mind me asking, Kyoya-kun-" Mukuro dodged a tonfa to the face. "Do you keep condoms on your person at most times?"

Kyoya smirked. He might as well have a bit of fun if he were to sink with the rest of those herbivores in their mafia madness.

"I carry a lot of things for multiple protocols."

"Then… Do you have anything for me? Perhaps more of those condoms for the both of us to have a bit of fun later on?" Mukuro shot a seductive grin at the prefect, winking his right eye in a suggestive manner. It was fun to mess around with someone seemed to have zero sexual drive.

However, his plan backfired when Kyoya actually approached him in an equally suggestive grin, swaying hips and all. The prefect slipped something thin into Mukuro's pants pocket.

"I believe this might be of great help. Come find me if you decide to follow it through. I'm always available to help." Kyoya whispered too close to Mukuro's ear, easily making the illusionist blush a brilliant red before exiting in the same fashion as how he entered the room.

Mukuro was speechless. His brain tried to process what just happened. Looking around, he saw Reborn filming new blackmail materials, his fellow guardians trying to put out the fire they accidentally started in the middle of the room, his boss half-naked with the also half-naked copy pinning him to the ground, and of course, to the 'thing' Kyoya slipped into his pocket…

… which turned out to be an orchidectomy pamphlet.

"…"

For the first time in his life, he regretted messing with his arch-rival.

To Be… Continued…?

Orchidectomy : ( or orchiectomy ) is basically the surgery to remove your balls.

Planning to put 'vasectomy' ( basically sterilize by sealing tube ) instead of 'orchidectomy', but I figured Hibari preferred the more painful method for his rival.

A/N : You know. I love how half of you people are mad at me for the cliffhanger ( I didn't realize it was one ) and asking-for-updates-please-don't-do-this-again while half of you are laughing at Ienari's pain.

This was supposed to be a SERIOUS fic. I have a 'proper' ( yeah right ) plot planned down, but I'm still stuck at how I'm gong to introduce Byakuran's brother into the story, because, umm, I mean, Byakuran and Tsuna shouldn't exist in this universe in the first place. In a sense, Ienari was supposed to be 'the' Sawada Tsunayoshi of this world, and the not-yet-introduced brother should be 'the' Byakuran. If anyone has any idea, please slap it on my face.

Nobody got the 'M' right. No cookies for you people. *eats all cookies and get fat*

I've dropped a lot of hints for what the future might be for our babies.

Tell me, what do you want to see in future chapters?