A/N: This chapter was brought to you from Reference Hell. Cookies to anyone who spots them all. Hey peeps! Today we present you with a special edition chapter! Yay (hopefully)! If you couldn't tell already, this note was not written by the beautiful Blue. But me, the lovely Llama! Yay (hopefully)! *cough* Anyway. This chapter was also written by me, as I felt the need some months ago to write my own addition to this giant story of ours. However, I didn't want to mess with the characterization already established and my writing style is quite different from Blue's so that would be bound to happen. Pre-Strawhats, though, Llama was mostly alone so I got to explore what she's like by herself and some of her weirdness that slowly comes in when she's more comfortable around those closest to her (which reflects me and I hope it's not too weird).

I took a page out of Blue's book and based some of what happened/happens here off stuff that I actually went to (though some things needed to be changed since Beyblades didn't exist yet for Llama when she poofed. They're basically tops, anyway).

Songs featured; It's All Your Fault - Pink, Somewhere Better - Muppets Treasure Island, Somewhere - Within Temptation, Someday Soon - Great Big Sea, It's Ours This Time - The Nightmare Before Christmas, Carrot Juice Is Murder - The Arrogant Worms, Tourniquet - Evanescence, Shiver My Timbers - Muppets Treasure Island. Hopefully they are all easily indicated.

There are a few short poems in this fic that are original to me. Mostly because when I'm down that tends to happen if my writing ability isn't shot.

Which brings me to my final point. More of my mental state ended up transferring over to Llama than I initially intended. Well nothing is named in this chapter I ended up giving her similar or the same issues that I actually have in real life. This means I feel the need to issue a warning for this chapter in case any of this is triggering.

WARNING: This chapter contains descriptions of self-harm, mental illness, and self-deprecation.

She was swimming. Or was she? She wasn't entirely sure. It was the same floaty feeling of drifting in a cool lake- and she was certainly moving- but the weightlessness was disconcerting rather than soothing, and the last thing she remembered was exploring the woods behind Pony's house.

Pony.

Llama bolted upright, arms flailing and legs kicking out. As a reward, she almost drowned.

The sudden shift in weight threw her off her precarious balance and she abruptly found herself with a mouth and nose full of water. She raced to the water's surface, sputtering and coughing indignantly as she reached the stagnant air.

Blinking water from her eyes, she quickly scanned her surroundings. She spotted a ship wreck nearby and swam to it, carefully climbing onto its slanted deck. Collapsing onto the old wood, Llama drew in great gasps of air and closed her eyes in relief. She waited for her strength to return before she sat up and took stock of her situation.

The first thing she noticed was the water. She'd have to be exceedingly stupid to not notice it, though, considering she was just in it. Llama was not that idiotic.

The second thing was how dark and misty it was, especially at the edges of this place. Well, shit.

"I'm in Bridgton," Llama muttered, finally getting to her feet. If she saw a Grey Widower she was so out. Her gaze dropped to the wood beneath her. "I'm on a boat." She felt like there should be a beat to go with that, but she had no idea what it would be. In any case, it was a mystery how this half-destroyed ship wasn't at the bottom of the ocean right now. She frowned. Was there a bottom? Did a lack of a bottom mean everything floated? Was gravity just screwed up here? Was there some eldritch horror, a servant of the Old Ones lurking in the depths?

ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn

A splash drew her attention to the water. Only ripples were a sign that anything was there. She wondered if it was a bass or trout of some kind. If she remembered correctly, that was what most people fished up in her area. Or smelt! She licked her lips at the thought, hoping she had time to make the smelt fry this year.

That water splashed again, pulling her from fishy dreams, and drew her gaze to a large fin as it broke the surface of the water in a distinctly sharklike way. Well shit.

A giant shark leapt from the water, tail lashing as it approached her. Llama dropped to the ground, eyes wide as the great beast flew over her and landed with a crash on the other side of the ship. The resulting wave disrupted it and sent it careening into a distant collection of wrecked ships. Some were even in better condition than the one to which she clung to for dear life.

She groaned and lay splayed out on the deck. It was still early and she was already tired. Though, to be fair, when wasn't she tired?

Just as it was occurring to her that she didn't actually know what time it was, an ear-splitting crack shook her from her daze. Without thought, she bolted up and latched onto the side of another ship next to her. She pulled herself up and slipped in through a porthole just as her first ship sank. She collapsed against the side of the new ship, gasping as she listened to the ruined one finally succumb to the sea's embrace.

Hmm, somewhat poetic. Probably not worth remembering.

Llama didn't move for a long time. Eventually though, she grew uncomfortable and stood to start exploring her new surroundings.

It was dark, much like the outside had been though it was still bright enough to see by. The walls around her appeared to be white or even a particular shade of white-blue – she couldn't be sure in this lighting. The accents seemed to be in blue, at least, with little waves lining the edges. She supposed it would have been pretty enough if the lights were on – and there were lights, Llama saw them sticking out from the walls – but why they were off she could only guess at. She was pretty sure at least one person should be up manning the ship to avoid crashing into things. Not that any of these ships were actually going anywhere…

"It's probably a really sinister reason," she muttered to herself. Still, it would help to get a lay of the land. So to speak.

Now, Llama had seen way too many horror movies to be stupid enough to call out for whomever, or whatever, might be on board with her. So, she stuck to the deepest shadows – of which there were plenty, and she pushed the thoughts of monsters lurking in those same shadows away – and carefully peeked through the tiny cracks in the doorways.

No matter where she looked, there wasn't a single sign of life.

Feeling nervous, she pulled out a sort-of-gray plush bunny with black eyes and nose and shaggy fur, and hugged it tightly against her chest. It was sort-of-gray because, under all the dirt and grime, the bunny was actually white. Not that Llama particularly cared. She'd get around to washing him. Eventually.

Companion secured, Llama continued her search of the ship. It was much bigger than she thought a ship could be. Granted, she knew very little about ships, so that wasn't all that surprising. Still, she was fairly confident that a thousand or more people could be stuffed into it. Which would be terrible in the case of a zombie outbreak.

She made a mental note to add that to her notebook later.

A thin layer of dust coated everything like a shroud from the morgue, though it seemed to be more from recent disuse rather than long established abandonment. Which was kind of weird in her honest opinion considering dust was mostly dead skin and she didn't even see a corpse anywhere.

She paused. Did she want to see a corpse? Well, as long as it wasn't an animal or moving it would be an interesting experience.

Eventually, when she was sure she had explored every inch of the ship, Llama returned to one of bedrooms that had seemed to belong to a woman. With everyone gone, she didn't think anyone would really care if she borrowed some clothes. She found a towel, quickly dried off, changed, and hung up her clothes in the connected bathroom. Reluctantly, she took off her scarf as well; it was absolutely soaked and needed it. She took out a red marker and a small notebook with a pencil attached to it with a piece of twine. All of which was perfectly fine.

Thank god for waterproofing.

She froze at the thought and her gaze shot to the watch on her right wrist. It was stopped at 4:13. Shit. She stared at the frozen hands for a moment before twisting the knob to see if that would do anything.

Nope.

And now it was stuck at 6:20. Fantastic.

She took it off and looked at the back. Yup. Water resistant, not waterproof. Fantastic. And it was her grandma's watch too.

Sighing, she put it back on and made a mental note to put it away once her clothes were dry. In the meantime, she was feeling a bit peckish.

Llama pocketed the notebook - these Marines and their huge pockets, she loved them - and uncapped the marker as she left the room. She marked the door with an 'X' and made her way to the kitchens, marking the walls with swirls, lines, and stars as she went. Once she reached the kitchens, she placed another 'X' on the door and stepped inside. She stopped dead.

There was no microwave. Shit.

She groaned, wondered how she missed that the first go 'round and headed to the pantry and the freezer-looking thing.

All raw ingredients. Shit hell.

Somewhere, whatever higher power or powers that might exist were laughing at her. Maybe. Probably. Did Pony count? Pony totally counted.

The thought of her friend had her biting her lip and digging her nails into her palms. A hole opened up in her chest, a hollow pit somewhere around her heart that she couldn't quite describe. It wasn't black, at least.

Llama took a steadying breath and began searching for something simple she could eat. There was an abundance of things she could throw into some trail mix in addition to some fresh fruit. Dinner secured, she ate quickly and quickly retreated to the bedroom with a glass of water (the plumbing still worked... she wasn't even going to pretend to understand how ships worked).

She locked the door when she returned, placed the glass on the bedside table, and moved Fluffy to the bed. She paused beside it and frowned, the creeping claws of nerves crawling through her veins. Taking a calming breath, she thoroughly checked the room to ensure she was the only one inside. There was empty save for her. Solitude verified, she moved the big chair (seriously who needed a chair this huge on a ship? Who needed a ship this big, anyway? Were these Marines invaders or something?) and shoved it in front of the door as extra security. Just because she hadn't found anyone on the ship - and an inventory of her stuff showed nothing was taken - didn't mean they didn't exist.

This place had giant sharks; she wasn't taking any risks.

Finally, she removed the ill-fitting Marine boots, collapsed on the bed with her favourite bunny, and fell asleep.

LL~~AA

Llama jerked awake and stared at Fluffy. It still appeared to be rather dark. What time was it? She squinted at her watch. 6:20. Huh.

Wait a minute.

Eyes wide, she jumped out of bed, tripping over some boots in the process. She stared uncomprehendingly at them for a moment before it all came rushing back.

The mist, the water, giant jumping sharks.

"Mrs. Verne is going to be so mad at me," she groaned, throwing an arm over her eyes. She'd probably never get another babysitting gig again. Which, okay, fine, she'd actually be rather happy about that except she really needed the money. Well, she probably didn't need money in this place but she couldn't stay here. She'd find a way out, right? Somehow?

Llama frowned, snagged Fluffy off the bed, and hugged him close to her chest. Eventually she got up and went to check her clothes. Everything had managed to dry overnight, though her scarf was still a little wet. That's fine, though. She didn't mind too much.

Even so, she figured she might as well wear the Marine clothes for a while. For a change.

After a quick shower (working electricity and running water; wow did she have no clue as to how boats were supposed to work) she packed up all her stuff, put on her stuff, and began her search for a way home.

Days passed. At least, Llama assumed they did. She has no way to track the passage of time. The sky never brightened but it didn't get any darker either. Her watch was still broken and she really liked sleeping but she had really bad sleeping habits. As a result, she was completely lost when it came to time. It made her itch. She needed to know the time and it irked her so much.

Also, she really needed batteries.

She sighed as the lights and pixels on her Gameboy flickered out and her progress was lost.

Bloody hell.

She took out the freshly dead batteries and chucked them over her shoulder and the railing of the Marine ship. Which would put acid into the water and damage whatever ecosystem existed here.

Llama bolted to her feet and spun to watch where they landed which -

- was right in the mouth of the giant shark. Which then proceeded to circle around the ship like a weird stalker. Or something.

Okay then.

Llama turned and headed to the kitchen. She returned with a tray full of raw meat. She wasn't sure how sharks handled frozen food but it didn't seem bothered by the batteries so…

Also, it was a Shark of Unusual Size; it probably lived off anything it could get its jaws on.

She tipped the tray over the railing, accidently dropping it into the water alongside the meat.

Whoops.

The shark made another pass and gobbled it all in a single bite. Then it promptly swam off somewhere

"Well," Llama mused, "that was a thing."

She decided to name it Neptune. It just seemed to fit.

LL~~AA

Llama couldn't decide if this was a good place to avoid zombies or not. On the one hand, it would be pretty hard for them to move between ships. Unless they were special zombies. Or smart ones. Or had superpowers like the Flash. But normal zombies would have a hard time.

The other hand involved narrow corridors and convoluted floor plans. Plus, it was still tricky t o pass between ships for living people. Neptune didn't exactly make for friendly waters either.

Thinking about it, this would be a terrible place to be stuck in during a zombie apocalypse.

Llama sighed as she dropped more meat into the water. Neptune didn't seem to be around today but she didn't really mind. She just wanted something to do.

"I conjured up the thought of being gone," she sang quietly as she danced back into the bowels of the ship. "But I'd probably even do that wrong." She had a lot of songs popping into her head lately. She wasn't quite sure where they came from, and she knew for a fact that she'd never heard any of them before she ended up here. It was like they just drifted in from some half-remembered dream.

It was kind of annoying to be honest.

Every inch of this particular ship had been explored by now, and she was thinking it was time to move on. The food supply didn't have much of a dent in it besides the meat – which was weird, given her hollow leg, but for some reason she just wasn't hungry as often lately – and while it was nice having a place to shower and a comfy bed, it was getting rather dull and uninteresting. It didn't help that this was definitely not assisting her search for a way home.

If that even meant anything at this point. Either way, it was time to move on.

So, she packed up all her things and as much food as she could, changed back into her normal clothes, dumped the rest of the meat into the water, and turned towards the nearest ship. It was much smaller than the Marine ship, and in much worse condition.

Sighing, Llama adjusted her scarf, pulled out her special stick, and jumped across to begin her exploration.

LL~~AA

Despite the vast number of ships, there seemed to be no one else around. It was rather eerie and made her feel as if she was in a horror movie. And not a cool one at that.

Maybe Neptune ate everyone.

"Did you eat everyone?" Llama asked the shark as it circled around. With a giant splash, it dove beneath the surface and swam away. Llama took that as a yes.

In any case, the lack of people meant she didn't feel too bad about rummaging through things. Several ships, particularly the ones with pirate flags, had vast treasure troves. Most of it was gold and jewels but every once in a while, she'd spot some silver jewelry and peculiar stones. A lot of it was really pretty and she figured nobody would really miss them with all the gold lying around. If anyone came back for it anyway. Gold just didn't suit her. A lot of it was also ugly or gaudy.

Llama played with a silver chain as she walked along this particular ship's railing. "So, what say you, Frederick?"

"I believe there was also betrayal, insanity, and cannibalism involved," the skeleton replied cheerily. He was often rather cheery for a dead guy. At least, she was pretty sure he was dead. His bones certainly didn't feel like the skeleton in the science room. Which really meant she was making an imaginary friend out of the bones of a once living dude. It was kind of creepy when she thought about it. So she didn't think about it.

She nodded and jumped down to the deck, approaching the pile of bones. She really needed to set him up better. Maybe she could find some glue?

"You will not be gluing me together, young lady!"

She rolled her eyes and stuffed him in a bag. "Oh, shut up. I'm getting food."

"At least be more considerate of others!"

"And now I'm arguing with my imagination," she muttered. "Fantastic."

Frederick huffed. "I may just be that, but I am the only thing between you and the insanity of isolation."

"Lies. I have Neptune."

"Who doesn't talk!"

"Says you, who's never seen another shark before."

"You don't know that! That could have been how I died!"

"Then why aren't you currently shit floating along in the ocean?" Well, that shut him up. Maybe she should write this shit down?

This ship's galley was, well, shit. To put it mildly. At the very least she hoped the weird smelling brown shit caked on the floor and walls wasn't shit.

The pantry was, thankfully, about 413% cleaner and Llama thanked whoever was in charge of that about a million times. Unfortunately, it was rather barren and she couldn't tell if that was from before or after it entered the Mist. They were probably just really bad at being pirates. The only thing that looked remotely appetizing was a strangely coloured fruit. Although even that was iffy.

The fruit in question looked like a flat banana with little swirly patterns all over it. It seemed to contain every colour imaginable. It was kinda trippy, but it didn't seem to have a real peel either, so that was a bonus. Licking her lips, Llama took a huge bite of it and –

- nearly choked on the horrendous thing she'd put in her mouth. The image of two strange, furry blue creatures merrily singing on TV suddenly popped into her head. Stupid creepy PSA puppets.

Swallowing the chunk in her mouth, she coughed and threw the fruit away, glaring at it all the while. That could not be called food.

"Tasty?" Frederick asked.

"I will dump you in the ocean," she growled. He laughed at her; she grumbled as she moved on to the next ship in search of something to eat.

LL~~AA

The first time she acknowledged It was on another Marine ship. She had changed into one of their rather unappealing uniforms again so she could wash her clothes. They didn't feel particularly grimly but wearing something she knew was 100% clean just made her feel better.

Now, initially she thought it was a trick of the light – which was always kind of shitty – or her eyes playing tricks on her. After all, she did once mistake a green soap dispenser for being purple. This time, however, she was thinking of how awful white was and how black or even gray would be so much better.

And, just like that, all the white in the uniform turned black.

Llama stared at it until it faded away to white once more.

"What the ever-loving hive monkeys?!"

A headache started to form behind her eyes but she ignored it as she focused on the colour-changing uniform. Well, she was pretty sure it wasn't really the uniform itself but something else. Maybe if she concentrated on purple pants.

And yup. Purple pants.

Llama grinned, big and wide, and somehow managed to resist the urge to cackle loudly. She didn't know how gained the power to change the colour of objects but it was so cool.

Or she had finally snapped and she was hallucinating. That was a good possibility too.

"I think you're a little beyond that already, my dear," Frederick chuckled.

"Shut up, Frederick," she muttered.

"You're the one that makes me talk."

"Oh, stop being meta," she groused. "It doesn't suit you."

The pants reverted back to their original colour and she immediately began experimenting, ignoring the ever-building headache in her skull. The effects of whatever it was she was doing only seemed to last a few moments and was easier the closer the object she was manipulating was to her. She also only seemed able to change one colour at a time. She wondered if she could expand that at all.

A flash of bright hot pain in her head had Llama stumbling, blinking black spots from her vision as she touched her fingers to a sudden damp spot beneath her nose.

She stared at bloodstained fingertips for a moment before the world dropped away.

LL~~AA

The first thing Llama noticed aware of was a tiny voice in the back of her head saying, "Well, that was stupid." She groaned in agreement.

If this was what it was like to be hungover she was glad she found alcohol abhorrent.

"…How about we take it slow from now on, hm?" Frederick suggested.

Again, Llama groaned in agreement.

LL~~AA

Her next misadventure in the dimension of hell – seriously, all it seemed to need now was a secret cow level… or zombies – was on an extremely weird ship called the Ishimura. It looked like it came out of some sci-fi thriller, complete with a few mangled corpses.

"Okay," she murmured, staring at the limbless torso before her, "this is the strangest case of cannibalism I have ever seen."

Frederick huffed from his bag. "My dear, this is the only case you've seen."

"Also true." She frowned. "That I know of."

He sighed.

She carefully stepped around the dead guy with what might have been his own half-eaten leg in his mouth and slowly made her way deeper into the ship, pulling out her stick as she moved. She made sure to poke the next corpse she came across, mentally checking that off her bucket list. She may or may not have giggled.

Eventually she found what appeared to be a shared living space. It was cramped, and filled with so much crap she didn't feel like going through it all. In the corner, however, was a dinky little TV that looked like it got shit reception and was hooked up to –

"An NES," Llama gasped, running her fingers reverently over the console. And, as a bonus, she spied copies of Dragon Warrior III and Pinbot that looked to be in excellent condition. Score.

She might have squealed a little. Just a little.

Unfortunately, the TV was bolted to the wall. Still, she packed up the console and games, just in case. As she did so, she spotted a yellow Gameboy cartridge with a mouse-like monster in the picture. She examined it with a frown before taking it. If she ever found batteries it would be nice to have a new game to play.

Though now that she thought about it, it was kind of strange to have such a mish-mash of tech levels in one ship. Granted, this whole place was messed up so she really shouldn't be so surprised anymore.

Opening the pantry, Llama was surprised. It probably wasn't so much that everything was covered in a thick layer of congealed blood. No, it was probably the armless zombie that was quietly eating its own shoulder. Silently, she closed the door and backed away.

"Well," Frederick muttered, "this is certainly turning into a devil's hell pit."

Llama stopped, torn between laughing and frowning. Frederick was just dumbfounded. "What?"

Giggling won out, even as she continued walking. "I-I don't k-know! It j-just-" she covered her mouth to try to muffle the sound of laughter. "It just came out!"

A broken moan silenced her, turning her blood to ice. She didn't stop moving but she glanced over her shoulder at the creature behind her. It was another zombie though it looked different from the other one. It was intact, to start with, with grimy, deathly pale skin and torn fingers. What remained of its clothing was barely fit to be rags and she noticed long, blackened teeth stretched through a wide lipless mouth. As she examined it, it twitched towards her.

Soft hazel eyes met boiling red ones.

The creature hunched over and shrieked.

Llama took off running, no longer concerned about being silent. Mad howls of murderous monsters rose rapidly throughout the ship. She upped her place, ignoring the pounding footsteps thundering behind her. She was almost glad for gym class now, turning on a dime to avoid the shadows darting down the halls towards her. Even so, she was not athletic and her lungs were soon screaming for air. Her body ached and cried for her to just stop.

She ignored it - had to had to had to - and put her stick away to dig out of one the gas cans Pony always insisted she carry around because, "I swear, if my car was human, it'd be a coffee addict!"

Never mind that said car was an ancient junker that a certain someone never remembered to fill!

She hoped Pony was okay.

Unscrewing the top, she sprayed a trail out behind her, careful not to get too much on herself. It was next to impossible but she tried her best. The next step wouldn't be very pleasant otherwise.

Finally, she burst through a door that took her to the deck. Her shoulder burned even as she tossed the can across the deck to the far railing. It bounced off several ravenous beasts before reaching its destination. She stumbled as she made to follow, ankle twisting at an odd angle as she set her foot down. Just as she ducked down, a long blackened tongue shot over her head and latched onto the neck of a distant zombie. She recovered quickly and moved out of the way as the tongue squeezed and the head popped off onto the deck. It screamed.

Llama bolted.

She fumbled for matches, quickly breaking and discarding many before one finally caught in a pool of gasoline. The old wood and rusted steel burst into flames just as she reached the edge of the ship. With a great leap, she dove overboard.

Llama loved the water. It wasn't as pretty as fire, but it was refreshing and cool. Soothing. Swimming was one of her favourite activities even if she didn't get to do it very often. She decent at it too. She never had managed to swim underwater without holding her nose, though. Diving was much harder and she could only manage really small and simple ones. But even this she could handle and she readied herself to swim away as fast as she could.

She hit the water.

She sank like a rock.

Llama stared wide-eyed into the black abyss dragging her down. Her limbs felt dead, iron weights attached to a stone body. She couldn't move. She barely had enough strength to keep her nose plugged. Her fingers twitched with rapidly dwindling energy and her eyelids drooped. The pressure of the water squeezed her, pushed and pulled until the cold dark consumed her. Her lungs burned and her hand fell away from her face, bubbles of air escaping in a stream of death.

Her eyes closed.

Water suddenly rushed around her. Or something else did. All she knew was a weightless whirling, the lightest swish of movement before everything was gone.

LL~~AA

A fierce jolt woke Llama with a great gasp, hands scrambling for purchase on the rough skin beneath her. Something stiff but flexible dug into her side and she curled around it as best she could. It felt kind of like a weird wavy triangle. An extremely wet weird wavy triangle. Though that might have just been her hands.

She blinked, weakly opening her eyes to see a blurry flame rising in the distance. She rubbed at them in a vain attempt to clear them. It only made it worse.

The thing below her shuddered and she glanced down at it. It wasn't some floating flotsam like she'd assumed but-

"Neptune?" she croaked. The giant shark lightly swished its tail, careful not to dislodge its passenger.

Llama looked back at the burning ship, only now recognizing the twisted screams of the zombies on board.

She looked away, tears stinging her eyes as she let the strange sea creature carry her away.

LL~~AA

Llama wasn't sure if she truly slept but a gentle nudge against her feet brought her out of a light doze. She blinked wearily at the shark. From this angle she could see only one of its eyes, and she swore it was looking at her in exasperation. How a shark could be exasperated she wasn't sure, but this place was crazy enough to believe it.

Her feet were bumped against something hard again.

Looking up, she saw a small wooden ship with an old rope ladder hanging over the railing.

"Oh," she breathed. Neptune twitched its tail in a manner Llama took as amusement.

Mustering what strength she had left, she carefully stood up on Neptune's back as it swam in tight circles by the ship. Her legs shook but they held. When the shark made a pass by the ladder Llama latched onto it, groaning with effort. The rope gave under her weight, creaking as it further frayed at the supports. But it held. Once she scrambled onto the ship's deck she peered over to see the shark's head peeking just a above the surface.

"Thank you," she whispered.

Neptune gave a huge splash and dove into the depths.

Llama took stock of her surroundings. It wasn't much of a ship, but it would do. The wood groaned as she walked over it, and large holes dotted the flooring in haphazard patterns. The mast had long since fallen and not even the fine layer of dirt seemed serviceable. A quick survey of the upper rooms revealed it to be similar, but older, to some of the more pirate-like ships she had visited. Ducking into the hold, she found a relatively intact room with some dry towels and clothes and a few dozen simple cots that weren't too badly off.

The shower was her first real destination. It wasn't in the best bathroom ever, but the water was still running and it was even hot, so she wasn't going to complain. She was tempted by the idea of a bath but-

No. Just. No.

She watched the water as it trailed down her body and splattered on the tiled floor. Drip, drop. Drip, drop. Like the pitter-patter of blood as it trickled down the vine.

"Watch, watch, the sparrow cries,

For the raven tells only lies.

Watch, watch, the raven soothes,

For the sparrow tells no truths.

And all in a titter, the birds do flitter,

And she does drown as her blood runs down."

Collapsing to the bathroom floor, Llama cried.

LL~~AA

"Do you think this is like the Bermuda Triangle?" Llama asked, tilting her head as she examined the horizon. She had been using binoculars, but they were kind of useless in this situation. She wondered if a telescope would be more effective.

"What do you mean, my dear?" Frederick responded. She had managed to locate some wires, strings, and pieces of wood to assemble him as best she could. It wasn't pretty and he was obviously missing some bones, but she wasn't sure if she had just never found them or if they had been lost back on the-

If they'd been lost.

"The Bermuda Triangle," she explained, "takes any and all ships - whether bound by air or sea - and sucks them in, never to be seen again."

He hummed. "Unlikely. There are no aircraft here and you were walking down the road when you came here!"

"Trail, actually. The Bunny Trail." She shrugged. "And I said like, not is." She pouted, fists coming up to rest on her hips. "Honestly, Frederick, don't you know wording is important?"

"To be perfectly frank, I failed grammar school."

She grinned. "I should hope you're not Frank. He's a terrible doctor."

He chuckled softly, shaking his head in restrained humor. Llama turned, throwing a fresh hunk of meat overboard. Neptune leaped high into the air and snatched it before splashing down hard into the water.

Frederick sighed. "I still don't get why you associate with that beast."

She frowned, turning towards the outer wall of the galley he rested against. "Excuse me?"

He gestured to the water. "It's a shark. It's more likely to eat you than have a tea party!"

She marched up to him, flicking him on the forehead and changing his skull to puke green. "Bad B-list blockbusters aside, Neptune had every opportunity to eat me when-" She choked, shook her head, and restarted. "It saved me. And whatever bizarro logic this place runs on, I don't care. Neptune is smart and likes me and I like it so I'm not going into whatever psycho-analytical bullshit my brain tries to throw at me!"

He sighed. "My dear, I-"

"Shut up!" She slapped the skull hard, sending it skittering across the deck. She stormed to the bow, not caring if she had broken it. He didn't really need it, anyway.

She felt her control over the skull's colour snap as she reached the top of the figurehead. She growled, throwing her head back to scream.

She didn't. Even now she couldn't raise her voice above the barest shout. There was no one to hear her save a giant shark and the bones of dead men. But her voice caught in her throat and tears carved tracks down her face. She bit down hard on lips and screamed in her mind to block out the noise filling her head as her fists met solid wood.

And only the Mists stirred as she beat her hands bloody.

LL~~AA

Llama couldn't decide. Should she take this 'DVD/VHS' thing - and what even was a DVD? - and the tapes that came with it as well as this too large pancake TV - no, seriously, why was it so flat? Was it better? Was it really necessary? And she knew TVs could be big, but this one was a freaking wall, who the hell needed that? - or should she just leave everything to sit and, well, sit and save space for something else, like a smaller TV?

"Decisions, decisions," she murmured dramatically.

"I don't know why this is so hard considering your carrying capacity," Frederick said.

"Like a pack mule," she muttered darkly.

He didn't respond.

She opted to just take the tapes - she'd really enjoyed them - if only to say she had them. But then again, they were kind of useless without something to play them on. And the TV was too big to move. Well, she'd definitely leave the Star Wars movies; Jar Jar Binks was rather annoying and Anakin ended up a bit to emo for her tastes. The Clone Wars wasn't too bad in her opinion, though. The Muppets were always fantastic and that was probably the best Moses movie she'd seen.

Sighing, Llama gave in and packed the tapes and machine, giving the TV one last glare before turning back to her skeletal companion. She was pleased to see that he was still blue.

She had certainly gotten much better at the whole colour changing thing. Now she could hold multiple colours at the same time for a few moments and just one for a good solid minute. She was getting the hang of it. She had all the time in the world, after all.

"There's gotta be something better. Something better," she sang as she packed Frederick up. "There's gotta be something better than this for me!"

Exiting the ship, Llama looked for the next nearest one to explore. She supposed, with everything she had accumulated over whatever period of time had passed - and she seriously needed to fix that, it was driving her crazy - that she could just set up somewhere for a while. But it got so boring so quickly, and if she was going to find anything that was going to hold her attention for more than five minutes, she would have to keep moving. Not that anything was keeping her attention for very long these days, anyway. Even her own stories and characters could barely hold her for more than a minute.

There was too much noiseless noise in her head and she just wanted it to stop.

Spotting a newer wooden ship that looked mostly intact, Llama lowered the boarding plank thingy she'd taken from another ship. She hummed as she practically skipped across it.

"Up flew the blue bird, black as death,

Up to the sun where it drew its last breath.

Down came the dragon, eyes of rage,

Down to the earth, now just bones of age.

Away swam the fish to find the cost,

Away to the dark, now forever lost."

She hopped down onto the new ship, leaving the last one - some retro-futuristic thing - behind. The SSV Norman or something. She wasn't paying that much attention to it. To be honest, she was getting kind of sick of finding ships that seemed more suited to space than sea.

Llama shook out her jitters, beat her knuckles into her thighs, and began her explorations.

LL~~AA

Llama was examining a series of bruises along her arm when it happened. They were the fairly light kind - just that weird yellowish-brown she could never determine the attractiveness of - and would probably fade in a few days. She had zero ideas on how she got them. Maybe she should start tracking her injuries. Lord knew she had enough of them. She had notebooks to spade too.

And then, as previously mentioned, it happened.

A great explosion of wide rocked the boat and rained down on the deck, narrowly missing her. She started and spun around with a wide grin and cheerful. She froze.

Her new guest was distinctly un-shark-like. It was longer and thinner, for one, with a long snout and straighter teeth. In fact, it looked rather like a-

"Dragon?" She frowned, tilting her head to the side.

It certainly looked like a dragon anyway. And it was examining her rather intently. Tentatively, she took a step back.

The sea dragon lunged at her, massive jaws ready to chomp down on her unwilling flesh. She dove to the side in an awkward roll as wood snapped to pieces behind her. She felt the cool heat the creature gave off as she gathered up what she could of Frederick and took off to the stern. The ship rocked madly beneath her feet as the dragon shifted, focus attuned to her as it readied another strike.

Breathing harshly, Llama exchanged Frederick for her stick and scrambled onto the railing. The ship tipped back sharply, nearly dislodging her and she wasn't sure if it was the dragon or the water. Probably both. Stick in hand, she whipped around to find a distraction.

She accidently whacked it across the nose.

The sea dragon reared back with a growl of irritation. It shook its head and glared at her. Well, that only further enraged it.

But it was enough time for her to jump.

In retrospect, this was a poor decision on her part as the next ship was too far away for her to reach. And she no longer had the ability to swim.

Shit crackers.

Neptune leaped straight out of the water below her. Her heart beat wildly in her chest as she stared at its wide jagged teeth. She was only slightly disappointed that her life wasn't flashing before her eyes.

Neptune caught her on its nose. She barely had time to acknowledge that fact before it tipped its body back. With a powerful swing of its tail, it threw her towards the ship she'd been aiming for. She flailed wildly, somehow managing to store her stick - maybe she should name it - and flew right towards the mast. Everything went dark in the instance before impact, her senses shorting out. She felt weightless, drifting into a freefall even as her body rammed into something.

Llama jolted awake as whatever she was lying on slammed into the ground. She blinked up at the cloudy sky and tried to puzzle out why her clothes felt damp. She carefully sat up and stared down at her water-splattered clothes. She seemed to be on a log of some kind, with bits of rope and fabric tied to it. A mast. Though why it was horizontal was beyond her. Standing up, she slowly turned around to examine her surroundings. She spotted two creatures fighting some distance away just as a pillar of water consumed them.

Everything came back at once.

Pain crashed into her, pushing her to her knees. She cried out in agony, curling in on herself as if it would help hold her together. Darkness curled at the edges of her vision as tears burned at her eyes. She tried to push it all away, tried to focus on the shark fighting for its life. Both their lives.

The sea dragon resurfaced, roaring like a behemoth of the Deep. Or maybe the servant of One. Shivers ran down her spine. The beast thrashed about in the water, smashing several nearby ships, and disturbing many more. Neptune rose up like a furious god and lunged at it. Teeth dug deeply into its long neck. The dragon screeched as Neptune shook its head, twisting the neck, and tearing off it reached up and sank its claws into the shark's side. Only inches away from its gills.

"Neptune!" she screamed, the sound ripping out of her throat and ringing like a shotgun blast through the Mists.

The sea dragon ripped the shark off of it, seemingly unbothered by the large chunk of its neck it took off in the process. Neptune flailed about uselessly for a moment before sinking below the waves. The water ran red.

"No," she croaked.

The sea dragon collapsed with a great huff and stretched out as if relaxing tense muscles. With a heavy blink, its eyes locked with hers. Her heart stopped.

The beast tensed, coiled up like a spring, and pounced.

A bloody form roared up behind the monster, wide jaws tearing into the dragon's neck. The monster shrieked and thrashed but Neptune held fast. The dragon lashed out, tearing itself away from the shark and almost severing its spine in the process as more flesh came away in its teeth. Neptune attacked again before it had the chance to recover, ripping through its fin-like wings like scissors through paper. The sea dragon's tail whipped out and cut a deep gorge down Neptune's back.

As Llama watched in amazed horror, the mist around them thinned. It spread and spread like a hole in the universe, and clear blue broke through the dim world of dingy purple.

"Neptune," she croaked, voice barely louder than a whisper as she blinked the light from her eyes. She cleared her throat and tried again. "Neptune!"

The sea dragon snapped at the shark, who dove deep just in time to avoid sharp teeth. Neptune rose up beneath it, powerful jaws latching tightly around the remains of its neck. It twisted just so and the sea dragon gave one last enraged roar before it finally stopped moving.

That was the last sight Llama saw before the blue consumed them. Only a patch of watery red remained.

"Neptune," she breathed, voice cracking as tears finally fell. She sat there for what seemed an eternity, until her legs ached from more than pain, until shivers shook her down to her bones. Until she had no more tears to shed.

Llama stood on shaking legs, pain and tired muscles making movement difficult. She crossed the mast to yet another ship, away from the wreckage of the fight. The next ship after that was close enough that she could climb despite her protesting body. So, she did. And she moved onto the one after that. And the one after that.

She kept moving until she collapsed out of agony and exhaustion, the words of a song she didn't know drifting off her tongue into the silence of the void:

"Lost in the darkness,

Hoping for a sign.

Instead there's only silence,

Can't you hear my screams?

Never stop hoping,

Need to know where you are.

But one thing's for sure,

You're always in my heart."

LL~~AA

Llama didn't sleep much after that despite Frederick's insistence on it. She couldn't risk a concussion. You weren't supposed to sleep with concussions, were you? She just didn't know how long that was supposed to be for; maybe she should have paid more attention to M*A*S*H. It probably didn't matter at this point. She'd probably been awake long enough. She didn't even know if she had a concussion; she couldn't remember the symptoms and she wasn't bleeding anywhere, surprisingly. So that was a step up from the rock and that blasted metal top.

"I really think you should rest, my dear," Frederick urged as Llama clamored aboard yet another ship. She wasn't sure how many she had visited at this point – and she hadn't even looted them! Her Party would be disappointed in her – but she didn't care anymore. For all she knew she'd been wandering in circles.

"As you've been saying, my dear brain. Brain ghost. Brain ghost skeleton."

"Hohoho! I didn't know you felt so highly of me!"

"Like cheese through a grater," she replied. Blinking, she stopped and gazed unseeingly into the distance.

"I think you should sleep, my dear."

"…Yeah, okay."

Llama turned abruptly, stumbling over a random ball in the process. She scowled at it before kicking it hard off the ship. It soared high into the sky, disappearing quickly into the Mists with what she liked to imagine was one of those anime twinkles.

"Woo! Kick it, Barack!"

"Sleep, my dear."

"…'kay…"

LL~~AA

This particular ship that Llama found herself on seemed to be, in general terms, made of wood. Large portions of it, however, consisted on some kind of metal. It tasted a bit iron-y, but that didn't really help her much.

"…Why did you lick it?" Frederick inquired, quirking an eyebrow.

Llama shrugged. "It seemed like a good idea at the time?"

The skeleton started grumbling to himself but she reduced it to a footnote in a story. She really didn't have the concentration to keep it up at the moment.

Continuing down the barren corridor (and, man, was this place big), a thought occurred to her.

"Frederick, where did that ball come from?"

He frowned and tapped his chin with a long bony finger. "Hm, I'm not sure. A storage unit, perhaps? This ship is fit for giants, my dear, there is sure to be some space set aside for recreational tools."

She turned her eyes up to the towering ceiling and sincerely hoped giants weren't a thing that actually existed. She was no David. "But then why was it on the deck?"

He shrugged. "Perhaps one of the crew dropped it before abandoning ship or dying? Perhaps there is some otherworldly or ghostly presence that wishes to see you suffer?"

"Don't need help with that," she muttered; he frowned. "Let's just move on, shall we?"

"As you wish."

She smiled slightly at the thought, beginning to softly sing one of her favourite songs as she skipped almost cheerfully down the halls;

"'Cause they said they'd stop the fighting

And they said they would bring peace.

And they said they'd find a serum that can cure all our disease.

And they said they'd house the homeless

And put black and white in tune.

And they said they'd feed a hungry child

And I hope it's someday soon!"

Llama turned a corner and stopped dead, a frown pulling at her lips as she stared at the sight before her. "What is that?"

"Well," Frederick began, "it appears to be a door."

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, I see that."

"Then why did you ask?"

She flipped him off. Approaching the door, she tilted her head as she examined it. It was massive, which she supposed fit a ship this size. She felt like an ant next to it. It was extremely ornate, especially against the plainness of everything else here. It almost looked like a statue of some kind anime mech. The only indications it wasn't were the rather obvious line and hinges that framed it as a moving object. It also seemed to be the reason for the random patches of metal built into the ship, if the surrounding section was anything to go by. It would definitely need stronger supports than just the wood.

She pushed on one of the doors. Strong, sturdy. Okay. She punched it.

"Jesus Hell!" she shrieked, hopping back as she cradled her fist. Pain brought hot tears to the corners of her eyes as she stared at her reddened hand.

"What was that for?" Frederick shouted.

"Hitting works on electronics!"

"This isn't an electronic! We don't even know if it's broken!"

She huffed and raised a dubious eyebrow. "Oh? And how can you tell?"

"My dear," Frederick stressed, eyes boring into hers, "stop."

Llama sighed and made a mental note to reduce the amount of pointless arguments she held with herself. It was starting to get ridiculous, even if they were fun. He was right, anyway. She didn't always like listening to her brain, but at least this didn't involve kitchen knives and pointy edges. Her brains were probably still a little scrambled from that fight – she twitched, twisting heavy stone weights from her shoulders – however many days ago that was.

Just more proof she needed help, she guessed.

Bracing herself against the door, she focused all of her strength into pushing it open. Slowly, it creaked inward.

Her jaw dropped as she gazed upon the treasure trove behind it.

The first thought that crossed her mind as she stared was 'alchemy'. The next corrected that to 'chemistry'. The third said the former sounded much cooler.

She stepped into the lab, eyes roving hungrily up the walls that almost seemed to sparkle in the dim lighting. Each one was set with shelves, with each of those filled to the brim with books of all sizes and colours, and boxes and elegant glass bottles and loose sheaves of paper.

Candles in antique holders burst alive as she entered, and she ran her hands along the long wooden table that took up the center of the room. It was covered with complicated sets of tubes and flasks, with burners on some kind of contraption that allowed everything to move all over the table. Other tables, similar to it but bare, ran along the edges of the room below the shelves almost like really tall benches.

"What is this place?" Frederick breathed in awe.

"Science," Llama replied, dropping his bag on one of the wall tables. It seemed to actually be attached to the wall. She rounded the center table and frowned at a corner set with vials and pink candles that haphazardly circled a pentagram. Weird.

"That hurt, you know," he gripped.

"You don't have a nervous system."

"I have feelings, my dear."

She waved him off and moved to the nearest shelves, climbing onto the table to reach them. She bypassed the boxes and bottles, more interested in the books than anything else. For some reason, none of their titles appeared in their spines despite many of them looking like they should. Curious, she picked one at random and pulled it out. Chemistry. Huh. She put it back and took out the next one. Physics.

"Urgh!"

Scrunched her nose, she shoved that one back into its place with more force than was strictly necessary and moved on. Dime Storm Magic. The next one was simply tilted 'Metadata'. Whatever that was.

Llama stopped, blinked, dropped the book in her hands with an echoing thud and returned to the last one. She stared at the shiny black cover with vaguely interesting font. She turned it over. A synopsis. Involving witches.

"Huh."

"What is it, my dear?"

She gently placed the book on the table. "There's fiction here."

"Huh."

"Yeah."

A wave of dizziness swept over her and she grunted as she leaned back against the shelves.

"Sleep, my dear," Frederick urged. "You can think about it in the morning."

She nodded and pulled out a blanket she'd nabbed from some ship ages ago. Setting up her scarf as a pillow, Llama took out Fluffy and curled up under the blanket to sleep.

LL~~AA

Out of all the subjects in school that Llama was required to take, math, science, and gym where the only ones she actually didn't like. Her recent (?) circumstances had given her a new appreciation for physical activity. Sports could still go to hell, though. Science was okay but she never fully understood it, and math was evil and she never really got beyond the basics. Well, she did but that didn't mean she actually remembered any of it. What use was trigonometry, anyway?

Long story short: Fuck physics.

Chemistry though? Chemistry was interesting. It was probably the only science she actually enjoyed and she regretted not paying more attention to it in class. Well, environmental science for the eleventh graders sounded interesting but the Pigeon Lady was teaching it and she'd already screwed up Llama's French. No way in hell was she putting up with that shit again.

And just, fuck physics.

"What exactly are you looking for, my dear?" Frederick asked, examining the growing pile of books beside her. She'd set him up by the small opening in the doors. They were open just enough for her to slip through but anything more would knock the skeleton over. She'd decorated him with some of the various Christmas decorations she had stashed away, particularly the loud, hard to break ones. If anyone other than her came in, she would know.

She might be kind of paranoid. Kind of.

The result was a haunted skeletal scarecrow.

"Snakes and mice get wrapped up so nice," she sang, "with spiders' legs and pretty bows. It's ours this time!"

"My dear," he sighed.

She smirked. "Science!"

"Science?"

"Yup!"

"But you're not fond of science."

She shrugged and tossed aside more physics books. "Well, magic would be better but I don't know any or even if it would work." She frowned, pulled out a notebook, and made a note.

12. Magic.

"And you believe science will help you?"

"Well, the TV and radio people think it will eventually solve all the world's problems."

"Because they are ever so reliable."

Giggling, Llama moved onto the next set of shelves and up a book at random. She frowned at the title and found no synopsis anywhere. Sitting back, she opened, "'The Official Unofficial Encyclopedia of Devil Fruit (Re-Revised Edition).' Okay then." Why this was next to the Element Encyclopedia of 5000 Spells and The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy she didn't know. Whoever organized this lab library had absolutely no sense of order.

Shrugging, she turned to a random page and began reading.

"Sabi-Sabi no Mi: paramecia. It grants the ability to rust objects, both organic and inorganic, on contact." Well, that explained nothing. She flipped to a different entry. "Yami-Yami no Mi: logia. The element of darkness, it grants the ability to create and control darkness." There was a picture to go with this one. It was of a large purple fruit that sort of resembled a pineapple. Or a tight-knit collection of oddly-shaped grapes. Pinegrapes? Why were they called pineapples in the first place? English was weird. Not that French was any better. 'Earth apples' just sounded ridiculous.

Another look at the picture, however, peaked her curiosity. It had the same swirly pattern as that terrible fruit she had before.

She quickly flipped through the book for the scant few pictures the book contained. She wasn't quite sure what she was looking for, or even if she wanted to find it, but the whirling thoughts in her head demanded she try.

Even so, Llama froze when her gaze fell upon it. There on the page was the exact image of the rainbow banana thing. She swiftly started reading.

"Iro-Iro no Mi: paramecia. It grants the ability to change the colour of light an object reflects. [May affect general light wavelengths.] Further testing required."

"Well, obviously," Frederick huffed. "You've barely scratched the surface of what you can do!"

She changed him to an obnoxious orange. "No, dumbbell, it literally says that."

He paused. "In the book?"

"In the book."

The candles flickered. "They might be messing with you."

"Oh, they are definitely messing with me." But this did provide an explanation for her weird abilities besides 'ghost powers'. (She still wasn't completely convinced she wasn't dead.) Magic fruit was definitely an interesting twist.

She turned to the front of the book, hoping for more information on these Devil Fruits. It was, weirdly enough, both the most scientific and the least scientific thing she had ever read. 'Incarnation of the Sea Devil' sounded like superstition – she didn't even feel more devilish than usual! What a copout – and 'fruits of the Sea Devil' sounded like a bad porno. She really hoped that wasn't actually a thing that existed. Pony had already destroyed her mental innocence, please let her keep something.

Further down the page, a short passage caught her eye. "Though Devil Fruits grant incredibly strong (or incredibly useless) powers, any who eat of the fruit will mysteriously lose the ability to swim."

"Oh my," Frederick gasped, covering his mouth.

Llama stared blankly down at the page, images of torn flesh and bloody teeth flashing behind her eyes. The crushing pressure of the water seemed to have risen up and gripped her in its icy hands. She choked, gasping for breath despite the abundance of air around her. Dimly she was aware of voices in her mind supplying speech to the figments of her imagination, the fake beings she created or conjured from stories when she had no other friends to turn to. Which meant she was faking this – like everything else – and was a stupid little bitch and why was she upset? She had no reason to be! Her life was great! She had no problems to be concerned about! It was her fault she got herself into this godforsaken place and it was good, it was what she deserved; everyone was better off without her worthless, attention-seeking ass, especially-

"Ki-"

She threw the book at him. She missed, of course. Her aim was shit and the book was too heavy to get any real distance. It was probably for the best; Frederick was fragile enough already, a book that size would destroy what was left of him.

Her stomach growled, low and loud in the silence of the lab. She scowled and punched her abdomen. It was hunger that got her into this mess. If she wasn't such a pig-

Llama took a deep breath and tried to focus on anything else. She knew she probably still had some food stashed away that would be easy to eat.

Ignoring it, she grabbed various chemicals and slid off the table to set up on the experiment table.

"My dear-"

She cut the thought off with a punch to the chest. Her stomach rumbled again so she pulled down more chemicals. She also took out a notebook and a chemistry text as well.

"What are you doing?" Frederick hazarded.

"Experimenting, organizing." Flipping open the notebook, she began to record the names of the various chemicals and components and the compounds everything consisted of. Focus shifting to the task she set out, she retrieved some safety goggles and got to work.

She worked until she was exhausted, ignoring the angry pain in her stomach as she refused – didn't deserve – to eat that night.

LL~~AA

"Listen up brothers and sisters, come hear my desperate tale. I speak of our friends of nature, trapped in the dirt like a jail! Vegetables live in oppress-" Llama halted her song as she came upon an unusual sight. A small door that was caved in and lying scattered about the floor in several large chunks. And by 'small' she meant 'normal-sized'. Because this place was frigging weird.

Scanning the corridors around her, Llama lifted the lantern she'd pilfered from the lab and stepped through the shattered entryway.

Inside was a towering library. Kind of. The shelves extended all the way up to the barely visible ceiling much like in the lab, but only a handful of shelves close to the ground actually contained anything. The books were clustered around a desk with a very high-backed chair that looked more like a throne. Both were deep shades of purple. Whoever designed this place was a genius. Even the carpet was a nice shade of orchid with accents of lavender and lilac. Llama cautiously removed one boot and stepped on it.

"Ohhh!" she moaned, collapsing onto the plush flooring. She could sleep on this forever. Shame she didn't have anything to cut this up with. This would have been a fantastic sleeping mat. Unfortunately, she had a rather strained relationship with pointy objects that were not her stick.

Rolling to her feet and kicking off her other boot, Llama approached the desk. She didn't have time to be goofing off; she had highly dangerous chemicals to mess with!

Rounding the chair, Llama froze. It was still occupied. A bloody quill was stuck in the guy's throat. The corpse's hand was flecked with blood and the thin coating down his neck looked like it had congealed a long time ago despite the rest of him looking relatively fresh. This was getting rather confusing.

So, Llama poked it with her stick. It fell over. Okay then.

She stepped up to examine the papers on the desk. She understood nothing.

Somehow the papers had managed to avoid all the blood (the desk didn't, boo). However, what was written on them was best described as chicken scratch. This man had obviously been a doctor, not a calligrapher. What she could make out made as much sense and she wasn't sure if it was some foreign language or some kind of code. There did seem to be quite a few formulas that she couldn't make heads or tails of. A quick look in the books revealed the exact same writing. They were even handbound, which suggested all the loose pages would have eventually ended up as a book if circumstances had been different.

She glanced down at the corpse with a frown. Maybe he was the owner of the lab she commandeered as her own? In which case…

Llama rifled through the desk drawers. If he was the original lab owner then he must have something to use for it.

"Aha!" she exclaimed as she opened an overly large door. Inside was a well-worn gasmask and several pairs of white gloves. Just what she needed to work with volatile and vivacious chemical combinations she had yet to understand.

Packing up the whole drawer, Llama spun around and-

-nearly jumped out of her skin at the sizable skeleton at the far end of the room that she hadn't noticed before. Well, she failed her spot check. At least it wasn't a critical fail, else she'd probably be a living bruise or something. In any case, this place was liable to give her a heart attack one of these days.

None of which really mattered when faced with the skeleton of a giant. Because, apparently, they did exist. She was so done with this shit.

"Feels like you, standing there so small, just a space between the stars," she hummed quietly, slowly backing out of the room. Once she was in the hall she raced back to the lab. She really hoped she wouldn't be encountering any living giants any time soon.

LL~~AA

Llama stood on the deck of different ship and sighed forlornly at the rock in her hand. The lab had no books on geology or crystals or anything. Somehow. How did a lab literally packed to the brim with books, of which more than half were science related (with a strangely large section of harlequin romance that she really didn't want to touch, even with a ten-foot pole) not have even one geology book in its collection? Apparently having an overabundance of physics books was more important!

Just. Fuck physics.

Finally, Llama chucked the rock at a nearby ship. It fell very, very short. Sighing once more, she grabbed another, repositioned, and rolled her shoulders.

"My dear, why are you doing this again?" Frederick was propped up in the door to the cabin, safe and secure in case she needed to rush them out of sight.

"Practicing." Maybe if she flicked her wrist just so- Score! She actually managed to hit her target that time! Now if only she could hit what she was actually aiming for. "Explosions are better when you're not standing right next to them."

"But why explosions?"

She stopped dead halfway through a throw, rock tumbling through from her fist into the depths below. Slowly, she turned all wide-eyed innocence and shocked disbelief as she stared at her skeletal companion. She clasped her hands to her chest and leaned forward as if imparting some great secret. "Because," she stage-whispered, "explosions are pretty."

If this was an anime, she swore he would have sweat-dropped. As he was a figment of her imagination, he did so anyway. "You are a very strange girl, my dear."

She smiled and went back to practicing (and why had she collected so many rocks? Yeah, they were pretty but they were literally all over the road, why did she need so many?) "I try."

Frederick sighed and left her to it.

(She made a mental note to ensure she didn't lose anything else when having dramatic conversation with herself. That was just dumb.)

LL~~AA

Llama stared listlessly at the page, mind adrift in the void. Her head hurt and her eyes kept slipping away to stare at nothing. She'd been on the same sentence for hours. She still didn't know what it said. Groaning, she dropped it and tipped sideways to lie on the table.

"Bored, my dear?" Frederick teased.

"Shut up," she muttered, flinging an arm over her eyes.

"You could continue your experiments."

Llama peeked out at the mess she'd made of the lab table. She rolled over. "Nah."

"There are still hundreds of books to-"

She snorted. He huffed.

"Throw stones! Exercise! Gather supplies!" he suggested.

"No, I'm-" Tired wasn't quite the right word. She'd gotten plenty of sleep recently but it wasn't nearly as effective as it should have been. She would probably try to sleep anyway just based on how she felt, but she doubted she would actually be able to rest. Her concentration was shot, she couldn't focus on anything for more than a minute and even though she was bored out of her mind, she couldn't think of anything she actually wanted to do. She still didn't have batteries since apparently everyone who ended up here lived in a battery-free society, but even if she did she was pretty sure not even her freaking Gameboy could keep her attention for very long. She was just so… so… listless? Restless? She didn't have the right words. Did they even exist?

"Perhaps you're just sad, my dear."

She frowned. That was a word already considered and pushed aside as 'not sounding right'. It seemed to fit her mood in some vague, general sense but something about it wasn't right. Off. Wrong. Because she wasn't actually sad or feeling blue or however the hell you described it. She knew what sad was and this was just not it.

This was just… down.

"No, not sad," she whispered, staring blankly at the ceiling. "This is too despondent for sad."

Turning her back on door and skeleton, Llama curled into a ball. And no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't get herself to cry.

LL~~AA

Llama stared at the coils of foamy soap dripping off the edges of the lab table. She should really come up with a better way to refer to it. Lable? No, that was stupid. Scratch and rewind.

"You know, my dear, I really don't think that was the type of explosion you were really aiming for."

She fixed him with a Look before returning to her soapy contemplation.

"You are not setting it on fire."

Llama groaned. "But it would be so much easier!"

"The ship is made of wood-"

"And metal!"

"-And you don't even know if burning it would have any real effect!"

"Then how am I supposed to clean this up?"

"Perhaps like a normal person?"

She sighed dramatically and whipped some soap into the corner with the graphite form she's made earlier. This is what she got for wanting to try her hand at science fair volcanos.

After she cleaned up, she returned to crafting shells for her bombs. They were crude constructs, but they were more for testing than anything else. Besides, they were meant to explode, they didn't have to look pretty.

Frowning, Llama fiddled with the unfinished shell in her hands and changed the dingy gray to a bright baby blue. Maybe when she was good enough she could make them a bit more glamorous. For now, she simply needed to perfect the shell and inner casing that would hold everything in place. It was a delicate process, after all, as the chemicals needed to be kept perfectly balanced until the moment of activation. She also needed to be careful of how much material she used; this place might be big but supplies were still limited.

What would happen if the bookcase broke and fell on her?

Llama banged her head against the shelves behind her. It only sort of helped as now she was worrying that would be the catalysis for the world coming down on top of her. Which was ridiculous considering the bookcase was literally the wall. How did structural integrity even work on this ship?

She sighed and moved onto the next shell. Only one science at a time, please. She was pretty sure that building shit was required math she wouldn't understand anyway. Math was evil. Screw math. And fuck physics.

Llama yawned loudly as she went about her work. It was tedious, despite being a useful time waster in this place. But her concentration wasn't that great at the best of times, and right now it was just shot to hell. It made the job take almost three times as long as it should. Everything just made her want to sleep, but often when she tried she simply couldn't. Nothing held her attention, and everything seemed boring and it felt like ants were skittering beneath her skin and itching to move but she had no real energy to do anything.

Blowing hair out of her face - which she really needed to cut it at some point; it hadn't really grown but even shoulder-length was annoying – she abandoned her work and stood. Maybe a walk would help clear her head. Llama sluggishly left the lab, harshly banging her knuckles into her thigh in a futile attempt to distract herself from the noise in her head.

LL~~AA

Cracker One failed to launch. Cracker Two was so delayed it barely sparked. Cracker Three ignited what was left of Cracker Two and was thus deemed inconclusive. It also set the ship ablaze so she was forced to find a new target. Cracker Four lacked an ignition. Cracker Five gave off a tiny explosion of mostly harmless sparks and Crackers Six through Nine produced similar results with varying degrees of size. They also ended up destroying her second target.

Llama bit her lip, tilted her head, and recorded each reaction in a notebook.

Frederick eyed her. "How many of those do you have?"

She blinked at the page she was on before turning to him. "You can never have too many books."

"My dear," he huffed.

She shrugged. "I buy them because I like them and want to use them for something and either forget or just never fill them but still want them for that purpose so I keep buying more for notes and shit." She hummed and tapped her chin with the pencil. "Or using blank pages in my school notebooks."

He raised an eyebrow. "My dear, please do not tell me you have all of those school notebooks stashed away on your person right at this moment."

She flushed. He sighed forlornly, rubbing his forehead like it was beginning to ache.

"In my defense," she huffed, "before I got here I was fully expecting to go to school the next day."

"Don't you have a backpack you take?"

"Yeah, but that's just for show." She quirked an eyebrow. "Do you want me to have back problems from carrying all my shit around for a whole day?"

He groaned and threw his hands into the air, muttering to himself about something that sounded suspiciously like 'obtuse children in a junkyard.'

…She was starting to think she should just make Frederick into an actual character in one of her stories. At the very least it would make talking to herself less weird.

"To be fair, humans generally don't do well in complete isolation," he said.

"Hm. Well, at least I have a reason to be crazy?"

"Exactly!"

She wasn't quite sure she believed that but who was she to doubt her own brain? Though it would be nice if it stopped randomly urging her to jump into the water or dive into oncoming traffic. She could do without, thanks.

Taking a deep breath, Llama curled into a tight ball and bit her lip hard until the spike of fear the thoughts sparked passed. Her fingernails dug crescents into her palms as she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to calm her breathing.

"I tried to kill the pain," she murmured, voice wavering on the lyrics that flew unbidden into her head. "But only brought more. So much more." Breathe, just breathe.

Eventually she calmed enough to shake herself away from the thoughts and stand up again. Her eyes lock onto the dimming flames of her first target as it slowly sank into the depths. Retrieving her notebook, she backed away from the rails.

"The Crackers did better than the Bombs," Frederick whispered. She nodded and jotted it down. "I think you're getting closer to a better mechanism. Your spark needs some work though."

She hummed. "The Snappers had a few good ones. It will all need a bit more fiddling though. Some of the chemicals won't mix properly so I'll need to go back and read up on them again."

"You'll likely need to adjust the specific amount of each, as well."

She squinted at the page. "How about-"

A sudden break in the clouds had her flinching and hiding against the rail. Peeking over it, she spotted a clear blue sky past the sparkling edges of the tear in the mist. A large wooden ship careened into the dark waters, smashing the debris littering the area. A black flag flew from the tallest mast, the jolly roger strange against the dreary backdrop. The ship crashed into another and, as swiftly as it tore, the mist converged and sealed the new arrivals in.

She wondered if they would survive longer than the last ones.

Despite all the romanticizing she knew she was guilty of, however, there was one fact that stuck with her through all of her through everything.

The past was harsh and it was better to leave it behind.

And pirates had been a terrible, cruel reality.

Llama gathered up her things and quickly went back to her home base.

LL~~AA

The hissing roar had barely registered before Llama whipped around and chucked a small bomb at the serpent that had been following her for a while now. It exploded in a brilliant flash of light and the beast roared as sparks of green and blue crackled around it. Llama quickly jumped to the next ship, ducked below deck, and followed the haphazard path she'd made a few sleep cycles ago. It led the way back to her mothership via a twisting route through the watery ruins. It was closer to the water than she was comfortable with - and she was rather sad about that reality still – but most of the wrecks were too tall for her to do it up high and few were stable enough to support a walkway anyway. All of which combined into her not knowing how the hell she would make it there.

The rickety route of gangplanks and broken masts was serviceable enough, and the new ship was still marooned in the remains of older ones so she didn't have to worry about anyone moving it and destroying her hard work. What she was worried about, however, was were the newcomers rummaging around in things that weren't theirs.

Well, nothing here really belonged to her either but after so long alone this place felt like it was hers. Sure, it wasn't safe – far from it – and it was so, so lonely and there was little beyond walls and fists and teeth to distract her from the bad thoughts, but it was hers.

It wasn't home but it was enough.

Which was why she was quite annoyed when she found a group of kids scavenging near her mothership.

"Devil spawn," she muttered, pulling up her scarf to hide the lower half of her face. She didn't care what Pony said, children were the true evil. Right up there with hospitals.

Well, Llama supposed that Verne kid was okay. Annoying, but okay. Whatever his name was. She forgot.

These little demons, though, were obviously ransacking the ship for supplies. Which was fine; she'd already looted it of anything she considered valuable. But they were still too close to her mothership and like hell would she let those reproductively required monsters raid her ship. So, she did the most reasonable thing she could think of.

She snuck up behind them and whacked them all with her stick.

The children shrieked, whipped around, took one look at her, and ran away screaming. Llama tilted her head, raised an eyebrow, then shrugged and stored her stick. That method was more effective than she thought would be but she wasn't going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Unless it was bananas.

Frowning at the weird wiring of her brain, Llama quickly hurried home. When she arrived, she checked all the entrances to ensure that her traps were still active and in place – and that no one seemed to have snuck aboard – and marked that as a positive on all fronts. Excellent. She disabled one, ducked inside, and reset it. Smirking, she skipped down to the lab.

Frederick sighed as she bounced into the room and unloaded her haul. "Don't you ever take a break, my dear?"

She tossed him a Look. "Oh? Shall I count the ways?"

"I meant when you're not so…" He gestured vaguely, a plethora of words flashing across her mind. Some just didn't fit while others she was adamantly against.

In the end, she just shrugged and said, "It's not that noisy today and I'm rather behind on my experiments anyway." She adjusted a burner and showed off an unlabeled flask filled with an iridescent blue liquid. "And I wanna play around with this, see what it is."

He frowned. "You know you haven't had luck with strange iridescent things in the past, my dear."

"Well, I'm not going to eat it."

"Can't you find a safer pastime?"

Her shoulders slumped and she pouted. "My batteries died again." Right when she was about to get a fire stone for her Eevee too. It was going to be so cool, she just knew it. It was a fire-type after all, why wouldn't it be cool? Now if only she could get the other versions, whatever they were. And a trade cable. And more Gameboys. And a shit ton of batteries.

"Even so…"

She rolled her eyes. "My concentration is still shot; let me do this while I still have the motivation."

"I suppose I should be grateful I'm not currently dressed in drag and doing the hula."

She snorted and carefully divided the mystery liquid into different flasks. There was just enough for evenly split it between five of them which meant she only had that many chances to figure out what this mystery liquid was; or at least narrow it down.

Llama hummed as she placed the first flask down on the burner and turned it on. She turned to her supplies – or what was left of it due to her increased bomb production – and a lot of the nearby ships didn't have what she needed if she hadn't already taken it. She wasn't keen on going too far away from the mothership if she didn't have to. She needed to be close in case of an invasion. But she also really didn't want to move. She liked this ship, giant skeleton creepiness aside.

Llama pulled out some copper sulfate, slivers of steel wool, and that weird metal powder she'd made the other day that she still needed to figure out. She was pretty sure she knew the formula for it considering what she used, but it would be better to make sure. And using a bit of it here couldn't hurt. Besides, what better way was there to discover new things about mystery metal than by mixing it with mystery liquid?

"That is a terrible idea, my dear. Stop it."

She waved him off and pulled on gloves and safety glasses.

"Where is your gasmask?"

"I dunno. The bathroom, maybe? I forget."

He sighed.

Turning to the burner, she flicked it on and set about organizing the table. She took out a thermometer and checked the temperature of the mystery liquid. 20 degrees Celsius. Interesting. She took additional measurements with the other flasks – lighter than water, 0 on the PH scale – and while she didn't have the equipment for everything she managed to make do.

By the time she was done with that, the burner flask experiment had taken on a slight red hue with a temperature increase of sixteen. Everything else seemed to remain the same.

Llama hummed, jotted everything down in a book, and picked up the copper sulfate. She carefully tapped some into a different flask and stirred it with a glass rod. It took a second to fully react but when it did she gasped.

It was beautiful.

The mixture darkened to a swirling pool of deep purple with streaks of a very pale yellow. They were sharp in tone and seemed to join together in an elegant dance. Llama stopped stirring and checked the burner flask – a little hotter and thicker but not yet boiling – before taking the measurements of the other mixture. It was a few degrees below room temp and the purple parts rose to the surface as it settled. Interesting. It told her jack shit, though.

Moving to the third flask of mystery liquid, Llama dumped a chunk of steel wool into it and stepped back. For a moment, nothing happened as the wool drifted cheerfully through the liquid. Then the air snapped with a crackling boom and she jumped back. Bubbles popped around the wool before dissipating into the crackle of electricity. Sparks jumped between the substances like tiny, white-hot roots. It was pretty, but she was pretty sure this broke a law or several. Then again, she ate an iridescent fruit that granted her the ability to change the colour of objects and turned her into a cement block in water, so what did she know?

The steel wool quickly dissolved and the frequency of the sparks increased.

"Umm…" Frederick started.

Llama nodded and climbed up one of ladders scaling the bookshelf walls. She glanced back when she felt she was high enough. The mixture, at that point, was little more than a flashing bulb that would fit nicely in an evil lair. As she watched, it starting humming like a demented bird and exploded in a ringing burst of burning light. Llama snapped her eyes shut against it and clung to the ladder like a leech.

Eventually, the light seemed to die and she cautiously opened her eyes. Her vision was horribly spotted but it didn't seem too bad overall. Blinking rapidly, she descended the ladder and patted herself down when she reached the floor. Everything seemed to be in order and she wasn't covered in anything strange so she figured she was alright. Hopefully the other flasks-

Llama jumped and rushed over to the burner, quickly turning it off and removing the flask from the heat. A swift survey showed nothing was on fire, which was a bit sad but she'd prefer not to burn the whole place down just yet.

"Well," Frederick breathed, "that was something."

She nodded and dropped onto a bench. Her eyes traced over the stark streak of shimmering blue on the table and… around a fresh hole in the floor. Okay. Pulling out the required pieces for a PH test, she carefully chose a spot of the now-goo-like substance and tested it. It ate the testing paper before she could get a result.

"Okay, I'm not touching that."

"No, you are not touching that."

Sighing, she grabbed the thermometer and jabbed it into the first flask. Or she tried to, at least. The contents were rock solid, and the ambient heat alone was enough to make her flinch back and check her hand for burns. Thankfully there didn't seem to be any. She grunted tossed the tool away, picking up her mystery metal and ignoring the sound of glass breaking. She upended the metal into the next flask of fluid, leaving a bit to use later. She stared down at the mixture intently as it slowly began to bubble.

Then, without warning, it exploded.

Llama flew back, only just saving her head from a meeting with the floor by tucking her chin in. She let out a loud 'oof' as she hit the ground and she laid splayed out like a fish on dry land as the dust settled.

"...Are you okay, my dear?"

She groaned.

"...Perhaps you should get some rest."

She ripped off her now sticky goggles and rolled on to stomach, cursing whatever high beings she still couldn't decide if they existed or not.

LL~~AA

Llama frowned at the breaker in her hands. It was just ordinary gunpowder but for some reason it smelt… different. Not off, really (could gunpowder even go off in that sense? Did it have a best before date? She'd have to look into that) but it was so much more poignant somehow. It didn't make any sense. Not that anything really made sense here.

This was starting to get confusing.

"Only starting?" Frederick chuckled.

"Oh, shut it, you."

She took another sniff. Yup, definitely stronger. Also slightly more pleasant but maybe she was just being weird.

"Lab accident."

Llama slowly turned to stare at him. His head was slightly tilted; she nudged it back into place.

"Ah, thank you, my dear. But seriously, lab accident with barely understood chemicals?"

She scowled. "This isn't a comic book."

"That would make it easier, wouldn't It?"

She jerked away, glowering at the table and the objects she had all but thrown onto it that morning. Or whatever it was.

He sighed. "My dear-"

An explosion rocked the boat, tipping the table's contents to the floor with a crash. Various chemicals, elements, and liquids mixed with broken glass and burnt wood. With a harshly uttered 'shit', she grabbed Frederick and threw herself out of the lab. The room burst into flames almost as soon as she cleared the doors.

She hit the ground hard, dropping the skeleton and rolling over several times in case any of her clothes caught. When she stopped she patted herself down and found that, no, they hadn't though her pant legs were a bit singed. Great. Fine. She could live with that. She turned to find Frederick lying limp on the floor. Several pieces had come loose and rolled down the hall. She scrambled after them.

Another explosion, pained screams. They were not the screams of children.

"Shiver my timbers, shiver my soul, yo ho heave ho. There are men whose hearts are as black as coal, yo ho heave ho," she whispered, gaze locked on the ceiling. She stood and ran.

Because not all the explosions were hers.

Yes, she booby-trapped the ship to high heaven but they were small, spread out, not-

The ship rocked with the force of another blast.

'Fire! In the second row! This whole place is a powder keg!

The tremors of chain reactions above sent shockwaves through floor beneath and made her legs shake and eyes water. The acrid smells were almost overwhelming; marshmallows and banana-boats and chemicals and poison gas and campfired and gunpowder. She latched onto that last one, held the sense of danger-safety close to her heart and ran as fast as her legs could carry her.

She'd designed the traps for her after all, for her and her forgetful brain. She left signs that were obvious to her, things she'd catch even at her most absent-minded, that were familiar notes and only just eye-catching enough to draw a some 'huh' from the curious but little else. She'd experimented with Pony, found what worked and what didn't or even worked too well. She walked the halls of the ship every day, keeping an eye out and memorizing every inch of each trap location. Memorizing and memorizing because she always forgot. And now the ship rocked and shook and heaved and everything shifted just enough that she couldn't trust that the traps were still in place. A few went off in her wake.

Her lungs burned and she wasn't sure if it was just exertion or if the heat and smoke were getting to them. Fire ate at the ship somewhere, the heat seeping into the colder spaced. She saw it lick along walls as she moved, always just within sight. She didn't stop, didn't pause or slow to watch it grow and fatten in morbid fascination the way she liked to do. She followed the winding corridors as they steady twisted up with stairs and stairs, up up up. And finally, finally, she reached the hatch that would take her to the deck. She scrambled up and out, slipping past the traps, and took a big gulp of mostly smoke-free air.

Only to choke on it as a gun was aimed right between her eyes.

It was a flintlock pistol as far as she could tell, and just how stereotypical could you get? Didn't current pirates have AKs or something? Couldn't these guys at least upgrade to a revolver? Or did they just want to be historically accurate?

She followed the path of the gun up to the rugged, scarred man holding it. And his rather modern-ish clothes. Scratch that last thought.

"Hey there, girly," he sneered, gesturing for her to get up. She stood wearily, eyes darting to the group of angry men around her. None of them were dressed like pirates but they were the only ones besides the kids that were currently in the Mist with her. Their flag had been kind of weird, maybe that explained It?

"Ya wouldn't happen ta know 'ow ta get outta here, now would ya?" another growled.

Llama curled into herself, arms wrapped tightly around her and fingers digging into her side. She bit her lips and shook her head.

"Now, now," yet another said, "that ain't right. We've seen yur traps, girly. Ya know this place" He stepped closer and shoved his face into hers. "Ya must know the exit."

She leaned back as far as she could without tipping over or touching the man behind her. She felt frozen, even as her breath hitched and sped up. She shook her head.

His face twisted into a snarl. "Hey, now." He reached for her.

A new explosion practically rocked the ship onto its side.

Her arm snapped out and backhanded the pirate across the nose. He reeled back and she ducked around him, racing to the railing while the men stumbled through the aftershocks. Her momentum rammed her into the rails. She grunted, scrambling over it with barely a look at where her little path was. She spotted it not too far away - surprisingly unmoved - and shimmied over to it just enough to risk a jump.

Blunted nails scratched her skin as she leapt.

Llama landed with a resounding crack - but the boards held; they held but how long, how long? - and bolted to the next ship. Caution was ditched in the waves and the boardwalk shook violently with each step she took. But it didn't matter. It didn't matter when fire hungrily licked behind her and pirates sneered and peered and what's the risk of drowning compared to that?

When she was close enough, she jumped to the pothole she always used and latched onto the edges.

The boardwalk dropped beneath her feet.

A gargled voice cried for help but she didn't turn. She scrambled into the new ship. She barely paused, racing through the halls as fast as she could. She bashed into walls, nearly ran into corners and tripped over her own feet.

The only sounds chasing her were her own rapid footprints and harsh breathing.

She made it to the other side, scrambled onto the next part of the boardwalk, and was halfway up the side of next ship when the cry of a cut off scream drew her attention.

Llama finished her ascent and, panting, finally turned back.

The entire ship was wreathed in flames. It lit the dark sky like a beacon in the night, the light painting the Mist the colours of sunrise. The fire almost seemed to dance before her eyes. She became aware of the intense heat as adrenaline faded from her system. She shivered despite it and hunched over to try to retain some measure of warmth. Black plumes of smoke rose high to mix with the Mist, forming a twisted signal if destruction.

It was beautiful.

Her eyes trailed down as an explosion made a hole below the waterline. Corpses floated right next to it. Her breath caught in her throat and she turned, collapsing to her knees and clutching at her head. She hadn't meant to do it. She hadn't meant, hadn't meant hadn'tmeanthadn'tmeanthadn'tmeant-

Frederick.

Her eyes snapped open (when had they closed?) and, standing, spun around to stare at the slowly sinking wrecking. The bodies were going with it.

"They probably would have killed you," Frederick whispered.

"Maybe."

"They weren't good people, my dear."

"Can't know that."

The ghost of a ghost sighed, shoulders dropping from some imagined weight.

"I forgot your bones," she whispered hoarsely.

"I wasn't actually attached to them, my dear."

"I can't have nice things," she hiccuped. "I ruin everything I touch."

"That's not-"

"Stupid, idiotic bitch."

Shutting down all thoughts of her imaginary friend, Llama collapsed to the deck in tears and bashed her head repeatedly against the hardwood as she cried.

The flaming ship sunk below the waves, all traces of it and the pirates consumed by the cold water.

LL~~AA

Llama didn't stay in one place again. She jumped from ship to ship, experimenting with explosives whenever she got the chance. Occasionally the children came too close to whatever ship she currently claimed as hers. They were easy to scare off.

While she found children annoying, she had to admit that the moniker they'd given her was rather amusing. For one because ninjas were awesome. For two because they managed to realize the importance of Mr Pointy. Or maybe that was because she kept hitting them with it. Either way, scaring the crap out of them was both hilarious and the only real source of entertainment she had since she still couldn't find working batteries and couldn't always focus on books.

That probably said more about her than she was willing to analyze.

In any case, Llama did everything she could to keep the bad thoughts away. If it didn't work, hitting her head usually helped knock them out.

While she still occasionally picked up some pretty jewelry, Llama tried to focus on only one thing.

Surviving.

LL~~AA

Ships that came in from beyond the Mist were rare but it did happen. Both before and after the kids and the pirates. Llama had never paid them much mind. They were never close enough to truly affect her. She'd occasionally hear shouting or screaming in the distance, or come across a new ship in an area she frequented.

But even with Neptune and the sea dragon gone there were still monsters that lurked in the depths. She never saw any of the newcomers alive. Except the pirates. And the children.

The pirates were dead now, though. Dead and gone with fire and chemicals. The kids were still around. How they survived when others didn't was a mystery to her. Maybe this was the real Neverland.

And for all her jokes about horrible things happening to kids, she'd never actually do anything to them. Sure, she hated kids but she would never wish for them to suffer. So she never did more to them than scare them away and hit them a little with Mr Pointy.

Children were a necessary evil. Like politicians.

There were times when Llama wondered if she should be concerned about her morbid sense if humour.

Rambling tangents aside, Llama started actively avoiding whatever came from Beyond. Except the kids, because they were apparently ants. Ants were fine when they were outside but could they stay out of the house, please?

Sighing, she stretched and headed off, just missing the dark shape sliding away in the water.

LL~~AA

Llama wondered when she'd stopped looking for a way home.

LL~~AA

Crabs, Llama decided, were bloody awful. Sure, the little ones were freaking adorable - really, the only small things that weren't adorable were freaking spiders, urgh - but if she didn't see one ever again she'd die happy.

Giant crabs were bloody freaking awful. This one in particular was an asshole. An asshole that was trying to eat her. It could go to hell.

Llama threw one of her larger bombs at it and ducked, quickly running alongside the railing to get a better angle. The sound of a cascading explosion was closely followed by a guttural roar. Because obviously. If Llama ever got out of here, she was going to whack Hollywood with her stick. Repeatedly.

She lept onto the rails and chucked her string bombs after lighting the fuse. They did not go far. She slumped as the tumbled towards the water, got caught on a giant pincer as it came up, and blow it off.

She sighed. That experiment was a bust. Meanwhile, the crab screamed.

She scowled even as she hopped to another ship. Crabs were not supposed to make those sounds. Did crabs even make vocal noise? What does the crab say? Why was this the thing that was confusing her when she was fighting a giant freaking man-eating crab?

Llama grabbed her next bomb - and this thing was taking way too many hits - and took aim. The crab lunged. She threw. It swallowed it.

She saw the moment it went off. The beast seemed to hiccup, belching out a cloud of smoke. Its momentum carried it forward until it collapsed in a heap in front of her. The waves rose, pushing the surrounding ships away. Several overturned. Hers rocked under the force and she sank into a defensive pose for balance. Her eyes remained locked in the animal.

Eventually the waves receded, the ships calmed and the huge corpse settled. Llama continued to stare at it for a moment before tossing one more bomb into its face. It blew up in a gory mess of blood and fishy flesh.

Satisfied, Llama jumped onto its treasure-covered back - and how did this shit stay on during that fight? Why did a crab even have all this shit on it on the first place? How did it even get it all on? Roll around in sticky glue? - and poked it with her stick just to make sure, then began scouring it for anything she might like.

After all, if she was going to be ambushed by monster crabs with glittering backs she might as well get something useful out of it.

LL~~AA

Llama made a mental note: her new sense of smell was weird but useful. She made a second one: pirates were scary and weird. The rubber one in particular. Though she might just be biased for fire.

It was at this point she wished she still had that devil fruit book. She really wanted to know how that one worked. And what kind of effects she could make with her explosions.

It occurred to Llama that she might be going crazy in here.

She wondered if she cared anymore.

LL~~AA

Llama felt like hissing. For one because the sun was too frigging bright, holy shit. For two because she hadn't liked the sun before all this, so she wasn't surprised she hated it even more after leaving the Mist.

Thus far, the Mist was winning in the the points department.

(And holy shit was it terrifying to find out that time didn't work properly there. How much time had passed? Did Pony even know she was missing? Would anyone be looking for her?)

Something was happening on shore, but she didn't really care. She just wanted out of the sun and away from everyone around her. She also didn't trust the look of the place they were docked at but maybe she'd spent too much time in a ship graveyard. But for all she knew there were just as many monsters here as in the Mist. So she did the next best thing.

She hid in the orange trees. (At least, she thought they were orange trees. They certainly looked like oranges and she wasn't about to question their orange-iness. Look, the only thing thing she needed to know about food was if it tasted good, leave her alone.)

She wasn't sure how much time passed after that - she might have dozed off - but the next thing she knew she was being bothered by a blond man.

"Ah, hello there, Llama-chan!" the curly-browed creep - what was his name again? Snajey? - sing-songed. "What are you doing in such a place? Com on out and I-"

He was close - too close, tooclosetooclose - and her reflects kicked in before she could even process anything.

She whipped out Mr Pointy and whacked curly-brow across the nose.

He yelped and fell back, wide eyes staring at her in shock. There was a red mark rapidly brightening on his face, but other than that he didn't seem all that affected by it. Damn it. She stamped down on the urge to apologize. She didn't know him, he shouldn't have that close and she brandished her stick when it looked like he would try to approach again.

Another blonde - this time a woman - and put her hand on curly-brow's shoulder. She was a spindly thing that reminded her of the trembling aspens back home. Which wasn't a great comparison, really, considering the big one was knocked down in that wind storm a couple years back.

"Sanji-san, perhaps we should leave her alone for now and let her adjust. I'm sure she's not used to such boisterous people just yet."

Sanji - she was kinda close on that? - sighed. "You're right, Kaya-chan." He stood, pulled out a cigarette and glanced at her before moving away. "Perhaps it's time to start on lunch. What would you like for dessert?"

Llama tuned them out and curled into herself. It would seem she was stuck here for a while.

Taking out Fluffy, Llama relaxed and went to sleep.

LL~~AA

When she woke, it was dark. And she was still tired. As per usual. Fantastic.

Sitting up, Llama noticed a covered dish just on the edge of the trees. Her stomach growled angrily at her. She sighed and investigated. Opening it revealed what had to be dinner and it smelled divine. Hesitating for only a second, she dug in.

It was a touch cold but still delicious, whatever it was. It was also not quite as filling as she'd hoped but there was a second dish that might have-

Chocolate.

Llama frowned at what had to be dessert. If one could call it that. It looked like some fancy French dish that she had no hope of naming. And it was chocolate. But maybe looks were deceiving? She reached out with her fork. After all, there might be some flavouring that would counteract the chocolate. Never judge a book-

Nope, it was chocolate. Pure, undiluted chocolate. Urgh.

She stood, picked up the trays, and wandered to the kitchen. She needed to throw this shit out. Or pawn it off on someone. Whichever came first.

Llama found the kitchen in the cabin beneath the trees which was actually rather convenient. A light was on and a person sat at the table, which was slightly less convenient. She stared at the dessert in her hand. Maybe that person would like it? Taking a steadying breath, she went inside.

The person - woman, tall, dark hair, curious eyes - looked up from the book in her hands as she entered. They stared awkwardly at each other for a moment before the woman smiled and offered the seat across from her. Llama took it, placing the dishes in front of her.

"Enjoyed Cook-san's cooking, I see," the woman said. "He's very good, wouldn't you say?"

She shrugged.

"Did it fill you up?"

She shook her head.

The woman quirked a brow. "But you haven't finished dessert."

"It's chocolate," she said as if that explained everything. Which it totally did.

The woman chuckled at the face she made. "You'll want to inform Cook-san, then. He can't stand wasted food and he always likes to make special treats for the girls on the ship."

Llama pushed the dessert towards her. She blinked but accepted with a smile. "My name is Robin, by the way."

"Llama…"

She laughed again. She had a nice laugh. "I know. You're all the crew can talk about at the moment."

Well. That was terrifying.

"Oh, it's only good things, I assure you. Captain-san has already decided that you'll be a member of this crew."

Llama wasn't entirely sure what to think of that. Her eyes dropped to the table, nerves fraying under Robin's stare. The book caught her eye and she leaned towards it. The Rainbow Mist?

"That's where you were," Robin said, fork scraping up the last of the chocolate monstrosity.

She frowned. "I thought it was Ape's Concert? Though…" She tilted her head. "What would an ape need a concert for?"

Robin chuckled. "Can't apes be musical? After all, boys can be rubber."

"I guess…"

"But to answer your first question; Ape's Concert is the name for graveyards like that. That particular one just happens to be contained in the Rainbow MIsts." She slid the book over to her. "I have all the volumes of this if you would like to read them."

She nodded and Robin left to retrieve them. Llama, feeling awkward after a minute or so, took the dishes to the sink.

"Ah, leave those," Robin said as she returned. "I can take care of them. I'm sure you want to get started on these."

Llama nodded eagerly, took the books with a mumbled 'thanks' and retreated outside. Someone was snoring loudly in the crow's nest, so she returned to the orange trees. Or whatever they were. Settling down, she cracked open the first book.

LL~~AA

The next day Sanji was going around with mid-morning snacks. Chocolatey snacks.

Llama had been dragged out of the trees - apparently they were mikans; she was considering calling them oranges in protest - and was currently hiding behind Bluejay since they wouldn't let her go anywhere else. Assbutts.

"Blue-chan! Llama-chan!" the cook sang as he noodle-danced over to them. She wondered if one of his past lives was a squid. "I have dessert for-"

"Chocolate is disgusting."

The pirates froze, Bluejay with her hand reaching for the treat and Sanji bent over with the tray held out to the girls. Slowly, they turned to her.

"Ah?"

"Chocolate," she repeated. "It's disgusting."

Sanji frowned, brows bunching up in confusion. "But… You ate the dessert I left for you last night?"

"I gave it to Robin." She fiddled with the end of her scarf. "Because it was disgusting."

Something in him seemed to break and the tray slipped from his hand. Thankfully, Blue caught it, bringing the desserts close with a cheerful, "More for me!" Sanji's face went through a complicated series of expressions that she couldn't read. Maybe no one had ever called his food gross before?

"It was chocolate," she pointed out. "So it was gross." Which really didn't seem to be helping if the twist of his face was anything to go by. At least Blue seemed amused by this? Or maybe she just liked having a shit tonne of chocolate. "Also beans. Not green beans or spring beans, those are good. But the kidney shaped ones. Like Lima beans or… kidney beans. Those are gross. So is chili. Not the country but the food, the country's probably nice. I've never been. Also milk. Milk is nasty. Unless it's in cereal. Or chocolate. Chocolate milk is good but strawberry is better. Oh, and hot chocolate is delicious, especially with whipped cream. Peanut butter is only good in a sandwich with jam. Salmon is gross. Mint is worse than chocolate, especially if it's with chocolate. Unless it's mint chocolate chip ice cream. Mint chocolate chip ice cream is delicious.

"Ah?" Sanji still seemed to be broken. And Blue was staring at her. Probably because that was the most she'd said in one go since she came aboard. Oops. She took the opportunity to flee.

LL~~AA

The Straw Hat pirates, it turned out, were insane. It was fantastic. There were days, however, when she was convinced the Mist had finally cracked her and this whole adventure was a massive hallucination. Knocking the thoughts out sometimes helped, but not often.

There was still something that didn't make sense, though.

It wasn't until after they'd escaped from G8 that she was able to get Robin alone.

The woman was set up in the kitchen for watch and Llama tiptoed in with an armful of books. Robin smiled at her as she approached and closed her book as she sat down. It looked like a history book, and Llama's fingers twitched with the urge to crack it open and learn its secrets.

"Did you enjoy them?" Robin asked, indicating the volumes she placed on the table.

She shrugged. They shared a quiet moment before Llama mustered the courage to speak.

"Why am I here?"

Robin blinked, obviously taken aback by the question. "What do you mean?"

She gestured vaguely. "I mean. Why am I here?"

"Captain-san-"

She shook her head. "No, like." She stopped and frowned. "The books said that people leaving the Mists end up at the same time if not the exact same place that they entered it. So." She swept her arms to encompass the room around them. "Why am I here?"

Robin tilted her head, eyes sparkling like she wanted tear everything down to sink her teeth into the mystery. "I don't know."

Llama slumped.

"It may be because you were with us when we left. Perhaps too much time had passed in your world or the connection was weak in that particular moment." She shrugged. "I'm not sure we'll ever know. Why not make the most of it while it lasts?"

There was something sad in the way she said it. Or Llama was just projecting. Llama was projecting.

She frowned, nodded, and stood.

"Bomb-chan," Robin called as she reached the galley door. She turned to her. "If you need anything-"

"I'll be fine," she murmured, retreating.

Thankfully the crow's nest was empty - the crew seemed to have finally realized it was her spot, even if some people still tried to use it for watch. Taking Fluffy out, Llama hugged the rabbit to her chest and curled to sleep, willing the tears away.

Because there was nothing wrong in her life that she should be upset about.