I need platonic IchiJyushi in my life.

So! New fandom! Hi! I've just started watching Osomatsu-san, and I must say, I really adore it... especially the bond between polar opposites Ichimatsu and Jyushimatsu. I don't know how often I'll be writing for this fandom, but I got this little idea for those two and just had to write it out. They're too precious for me to resist!

There's discussion of self-harm here, by the way. Just want that to be clear.

Ichimatsu lay alone in the bedroom of his empty house with his arms stretched over his head, his thin tank top not doing much to ward off the summer's heat.

Alone. Just like he liked it, he insisted.

It wasn't like his brothers didn't offer to bring him along to the beach. He just didn't want to go. Playing stupid games, eating food they could have just eaten at home, flirting with girls they'd never see again and who would probably reject them anyway... what a waste of time.

Yeah, a waste of time, unlike laying on the floor and counting the cracks in the ceiling, right?

At least for this he didn't have to go out in public in a swimsuit.

A small urge inside of him told him to suck it up and join his brothers on the beach, told him that he really did want to get out of this boring, quiet house, but some firm internal swearing shut that urge up for the time being. What would it accomplish, going out there among people who didn't care about him? Not that it mattered that they didn't. He didn't care about other people, either. It was fine. He was fine laying here alone all afternoon. He'd told his brothers that at least ten times while they got ready to go have frivolous fun, so surely it had to be true. Just lay there like a lump and don't move. It sounded like a perfect activity for a lazy, worthless trash bag like himself.

Well, he did get up earlier, shortly after they left, to do one thing that weighed heavily on his mind. That particular activity ended in his arms stinging from self-inflicted scratches. He could handle the pain of that. He deserved it, after all.

"I'm home!" A loud, energetic voice echoed through the house. Jyushimatsu wasn't home to be invited on the spontaneous beach trip, since he'd vanished that morning for baseball practice. Looked like he finally finished with that. Ichimatsu made a small grunt of acknowledgment that likely went unheard as his younger brother entered the room to drop his equipment in the corner and kick off his cleats. He turned away from Jyushimatsu in order to continue his fascinating hobby of ceiling study, but it wasn't long before he had Jyushimatsu crouching next to him, his grinning face mere inches from Ichimatsu's.

"Where'd everybody go?" Jyushimatsu asked.

"Beach," Ichimatsu grunted with as little effort as possible.

"Without you?" he asked with a head tilt.

"I didn't wanna," he said. "They told me to tell you you're invited when you got back, though."

"Nah, I don't wanna go, either," Jyushimatsu said. "I'm tired from baseball." 'Tired' didn't sound like a word that would ever describe the fifth Matsuno, and that wild grin certainly betrayed that claim, but it was what he stuck with as he remained in place by Ichimatsu's side. "I'll just stay with you!"

"Hmph." Ichimatsu rolled over on his side, away from Jyushimatsu. "Won't be much fun. I don't wanna talk right now."

"You feeling sick, big brother?" Jyushimatsu asked.

Ichimatsu snorted. "Yeah." Whatever cloud had settled in his brain years ago and refused to leave was sure as hell a sickness. He wasn't lying.

"Hm... oh! I get it!" Jyushimatsu cried out. "I know what's wrong!"

"How?" Ichimatsu asked, his patience tried. Even he wasn't heartless enough to make someone like Jyushimatsu feel bad by telling him to go away, but he really wanted some peace and quiet right now. Why was Jyushimatsu wasting his time on him, anyway?

"I know exactly why you stayed home! It's all over your arms!"

"What?!" Ichimatsu yelped with the most emotion he'd displayed all week. Shit, of course someone would notice that! Immediately he rolled over on his stomach and tucked his arms under his body, hiding them from view.

"Yeah, with all those scratches, it's so obvious what you did! You wanted to stay home so you could go play with cats, right?"

"Huh?" That wasn't the guess Ichimatsu expected.

"We all know you love cats, Ichimatsu! You don't have to hide it! If you'd rather hang out with cats for the day, we get it! But it looks like you found a nasty one, right? So weird! I thought all cats loved you! Guess some are just mean!" Jyushimatsu rattled off at a pace that was downright exhausting to listen to.

"Yeah. Mean cat," Ichimatsu mumbled. He hadn't even considered that excuse, but the others would believe that easily if he said it before they guessed anything else, wouldn't they? He silently thanked Jyushimatsu for being so naive and innocent that "cats" was his immediate conclusion to seeing his depressed brother scratched up like this. If the others showed up instead, surely they wouldn't be so clueless.

"I know what'll make you feel better! Stay right there!" Jyushimatsu chirped as he sprung up and rushed out of the room. 'Stay right there' wasn't a hard request to follow; Ichimatsu had barely twitched a toe by the time Jyushimatsu came rushing back with a first aid kit and a wet paper towel.

"We gotta clean that up! You'll get infected!" Jyushimatsu said. "It's okay, I know how to do this! I get scraped up all the time during baseball! Just sit up!"

It took a major portion of the energy he had, but Ichimatsu humored his brother's enthusiasm and pushed himself up so he sat cross-legged. Jyushimatsu grabbed Ichimatsu's arm, pulled it out straight, and dabbed at one of his cuts with the paper towel, leading Ichimatsu to yelp.

"That stings!" he snapped, the sting doing the opposite of his brother's promise to make things better. He could handle the pain when he was the one who caused it, but this was a bit much. "What is on that thing?! I thought it was water!"

"I'm disinfecting it! I don't want my big brother getting sick!" Jyushimatsu insisted. "It's for the best, I promise!"

Ichimatsu kept hissing and swearing as Jyushimatsu cleaned out his cuts, but this display of temper did nothing to slow the younger Matsuno down or deter his grin. After what felt like much too long to the pained Ichimatsu, Jyushimatsu finally tossed the towel to the floor and claimed the first aid kit. "Now for the fun part!" he said as he rifled through the box. "Which ones, which ones... ooh, these!" he said. "All right, arm out again!" Ichimatsu would have never voluntarily offered his arm after what happened to it last time, but he didn't even have a chance to make that choice for himself before he had Jyushimatsu grabbing him again. After getting the arm in position, Jyushimatsu retrieved the package of bandages he'd found from the first aid kit once more. He reached in and pulled out several at once, and with surprising dexterity, managed to apply each bandage at a steady pace. Each bandage was a different bright color, with cat faces of various fur patterns adorning each bandage and smiling up at Ichimatsu.

The bandages were kinda cute...

"Um... thanks," Ichimatsu mumbled.

"No problem!" Jyushimatsu replied in his usual lack of indoor voice as he took Ichimatsu's other arm and started bandaging it as well. "Gotta take care of my brother! Especially since you look after me, too!"

"Even though the cuts are because I did something stupid?" Ichimatsu asked. "I'm the dumbass who went and got attacked by a cat."

"Why's that matter?" Jyushimatsu asked. "You're not stupid. Stuff just happens! Not your fault! Doesn't mean I won't take care of it!" He placed the final bandage, then let go of Ichimatsu and admired his handiwork. "There! Feeling better?"

"A bit, yeah," Ichimatsu admitted. Cat bandages really made him feel better? What was he, five? "Um... one more thing," he asked. "Could you get my hoodie?"

"But it's super super hot out!" Jyushimatsu said.

"Yeah, but... I don't want the others to see this," Ichimatsu said, unsure if he was more worried about them guessing the source of his injuries or about the cat bandages.

"Ohhh. Got it!" Jyushimatsu skipped his way over to the closet, reached in, and tossed the purple hoodie in Ichimatsu's direction. He pulled it over his head, grateful for the privacy it offered, if not for the sweltering heat.

"Need anything else?" Jyushimatsu asked.

"No. I'm fine," Ichimatsu said. "You going to the beach?"

"Still tired!" Jyushimatsu said with his usual energy. "Besides, I gotta help look after you! You tell me if you need anything, and I'll do it!"

"Thanks," Ichimatsu said, honestly grateful for the offer, even if he couldn't imagine taking it up without feeling like garbage for being such an imposition. Well, if anyone had to walk in on him and coddle him like this, at least it was Jyushimatsu. No comments on how stupid he'd have to be to cut himself up, no constant badgering about his mental state, just slap on some bandages and he'll be on his way, forever clueless as to what he just witnessed.

"Oh... and big brother?" Jyushimatsu said. "Next time you feel like doing something like... like playing with mean cats... how about you talk to us instead? Me, or any of the others? I bet they won't mind. You shouldn't do things that hurt just to make yourself feel better. It won't make you feel better at all! Just talk to us, and we'll do something nice that doesn't hurt like... like cat scratches!"

What was with the hesitation? Did he figure-?

No, of course he didn't. He was Jyushimatsu. He didn't even know what cutting was. Right?

"Sure. I will." Exhausted in several ways, Ichimatsu collapsed onto the nearest pillow, not even bothering to pull up the blanket. Jyushimatsu crouched by his side again and patted his head.

"We love you, big brother."

Ichimatsu grunted in response.

"I'm gonna go watch TV. You take a nap until you feel better! Come get me if you need anything!" With that, Jyushimatsu skipped off and let his brother be alone once more.

It took a lot for him to admit it, but Ichimatsu would have had a worse day if Jyushimatsu didn't come home.