Here's Chapter 4 and I'm tired of saying I'm sorry for the long waits because you get the picture. Depression does this shit to you; it sucks out your motivation and will to do anything. But even so, I wrote this and I hope you like it. If not, well then give me suggestions as to where to take this story because I have no ideas.

Also, to jadzjewels who said Bella's realization to being in love with Alice was a complete 180, go back and read the subtle little bread crumbs I left. She's felt the symptoms for a while but only now pieced together that they were connected to love. If the hints I left in the previous chapters weren't enough, then I'm sorry if it is a sudden thing.

Groaning, I fall back against my pillow and put my arm over my eyes. I can't believe I didn't notice before…it's all painfully obvious now. She was the one I missed the most when they all left. She was always the one who thought of my wellbeing, not Edward and I've always felt more comfortable with her than with him. Safer, even…

I'm startled by the sound of the door closing and three sets of footsteps moving through the house; the heaviest moving to the kitchen, the average moving to the living area, and the lightest rushing up the stairs. When the door opens, I uncover one of my eyes and look at my sister. She looks worried out of her mind and when she sees me, she walks over and stops by the side of the bed. Knowing what she wants, I scoot over a little and open my arms, allowing her to curl into me while laying on my shoulder.

"You rushed out of school so quickly…what happened?"

With a sigh, I adjust a little bit so we're more comfortable. "Nothing you need to worry about, sweetie. Just…something caught me by surprise, that's all."

"You know you can tell me anything, right? I may be a little unstable sometimes and I make rash decisions, but I swear I only have your best interests at heart…"

Squeezing my little sister gently and placing a kiss to her head, I nod. "I know, and I love you even more because of that. But I need some time to figure this out for myself. I promise, you'll be the first to know when I do."

She nods and we stay there for a while, her in my arms while we talk about random things. I know Hunter and Bash are keeping their distance, seeing as how Eliza and I like to have some time alone sometimes to just talk or do sisterly things without the boys. We must've been talking for a while because it's not long before Hunter calls us down for dinner.

Eliza groans, burrowing deeper into my embrace. "I'm comfortable, don't make me leave."

"I think he made baked chicken alfredo."

Eliza quickly melts from my arms, literally considering she shadow traveled downstairs. I chuckle as I follow, taking the stairs like a normal person. When I sit down, Hunter hands me a plate and we eat in relative silence. Hunter tells us a little about his day as a TA while Bash and Eliza tell a little bit about their classes. I'm silent for the most part, only speaking when I'm asked a direct question. I can tell my siblings are worried but I can't help it. The revelation that I love Alice is too difficult to wrap my mind around and I don't want biased opinions interfering with my own.

After dinner, Hunter and I wash the dishes while Eliza and Bash go into the living area to play something on the PlayStation. My big brother gives me a concerned look before speaking in my head. "You okay? What happened at school?"

"Like I told Eliza, nothing you need to worry about."

"You're my little sister, Isa…I'm gonna worry about you regardless."

With a sigh, I put the last of the dishes in their places before turning to Hunter. "I love you and I know it all comes from a place of love but I need some time. Can you give me that? Please?"

He nods and mumbles out an "of course" before walking into the living area while I walk upstairs. Laying back on my bed, I can't help the silent tears that fall from my eyes. My chest hurts and it's hard to breathe, like a weight is set on my torso and I can't see it much less do anything about it. I'm torn between wanting to be with Alice anyway I can be, even if it's just as friends, but I'm also scared that she'll leave again. That if something happens or if Edward says the word, the whole family will up and leave just like last time and I don't think I can handle getting close to them again if they could still be a flight risk.

There's a hesitant knock on my door and I wipe my eyes before sitting up. "Come in."

Bash steps into my room in his pajamas, lingering in the doorway. He's his 10-year-old self when we're at home and he looks so small at the moment that it hurts my heart more than it already is. "Can…can I still sleep with you, Isa?"

"Of course, Bash. Come here." He shuffles into my room and closes the door, climbing into bed with me.

I kiss his forehead and get up. "Let me change and brush my teeth. I'll be right back, okay?"

He nods and I get ready for bed quickly. He's watching an episode of the Rugrats when I get out of the bathroom, the one where they fall out of the closet as teenagers. All Growed Up, I think it's called. When I lay down, he curls into my side immediately and clutches my shirt much like this morning. I wrap my arms around him but don't get to sleep. Most of the night I'm plagued with conflicting thoughts about my feelings. I don't even know why this is such a big deal. If I let them in but set boundaries, I should be fine right? Besides, if they leave, I'll always have my siblings.

"Stop thinking so loud, you're waking the dead."

The sudden voice in my head startles me, causing Bash to shift around and let out a deep sigh before he settles again.

"Dad?"

"Glad to see you can still distinguish my voice. But that's not the point. What's wrong, Isabella?"

I think about it for a second, debating whether to tell my father what I told Eliza and Hunter or if I should tell him the truth. Maybe he can shed some light on the situation. He did love mom, after all and he is unbiased for the most part…

"Well…you know those vampires, the ones who left me before Eliza and Hunter found me?"

"Yeah…"

"They're here, in Forks, and I sorta…maybe…kinda might've developed feelings for Alice Cullen…"

"Okay. And what does that have to do with you thinking so loud?"

"I don't know what to do. On one hand I can let her in and tell her how I feel but what if she hurts me again? Her mate is out there somewhere and there's no guarantee it's me…in fact, the chances are slim to none. I don't think I can handle that."

"What about the other hand?"

"On the other hand, I could not tell her but there's also no guarantee that I'll get over these feelings. I know I have literally all the time in the world, but it's lonely without someone to love. I'm so sure of this, but I was so sure about Edward too…"

"That boy is the one who hurt you, not Alice. Yes, they went along with whatever he said but they're a coven. They're family, just like you and your siblings. I genuinely believe everyone but that idiot thought they were doing the right thing by leaving to protect you. Now that you can take care of yourself, I think they'll stand by you."

"That think is what worries me. There's still a chance I'll get hurt, daddy…"

There's a pause and I realize that's the first time I've sounded like the little girl my dad still sees me as. Before either of us can think much on it, he clears his throat. "But isn't that what life is about? Taking risks? It would be a pretty dull existence if you knew every single thing that's going to happen. In the words of Harlan Ellison: "Without pain, there can be no pleasure. Without sadness, there can be no happiness. Without misery there can be no beauty. And without these, life is endless, hopeless, doomed and damned." Do you understand?"

He's right, obviously. It's just…so easy to close them out after they've hurt me once under the pretense of protecting my heart. When, in all reality, I want them back in my life. I want them back in my life so bad it's scary. I want things to go back to how they were before they left…well, to a point. I want my big brother Emmett back. I want my second parents back. Hell, I'll even settle for Rosalie's cold glares and Jasper's tense politeness. But the thing I want most is my relationship with Alice; how close we used to be, texting every chance we could, talking to all hours of the night when she'd stay with me instead of Edward.

"Think about it. Now, though, you should rest. I know you don't tire physically, but you must be mentally and emotionally exhausted."

"Okay. Thanks, dad. Really, talking helped a lot."

"I'm always here for you four; if not physically, then in spirit."

The last thing I hear before finally falling asleep is the song towards the end of the movie.

The next day, I wake up and immediately notice that Bash isn't next to me. "Bash?"

"Oh, hey Isa. Glad to hear you're awake. Sorry if you're freaking out, we didn't wanna wake you up because you looked exhausted so we let you rest. Hunter told the teachers you're sick with a 24-hour thing and that you'll be here tomorrow."

"Okay. Are you guys doing okay? Eliza hasn't set anything or anyone on fire, has she?"

He chuckles and the sound makes me smile. "No, but she looks like she wants to. The Cullens, even Edward, have been asking about you and if you're okay. The small one, Alice? She wanted to go see you until Eliza mentioned the house being rigged again. She's been antsy all day and her eyes keep glazing over but every time they do, she gets frustrated and the cycle just repeats itself."

"Well, it's…" I check the clock and see it's nearly 4 in the afternoon, which is surprising because I never sleep more than five or six hours a day at the most. "How is it almost 4? I didn't stay up that late!"

"Like we said, you looked exhausted. But class is almost over, we'll see you in a little while."

I get out of bed with a sigh, the same heavy feeling on my chest making breathing difficult once again. What is this feeling? Why am I feeling it? How do I make it stop? I let out a frustrated growl and shower before I get dressed and walk down to the kitchen for something to eat.

"We need to go shopping…there's almost nothing here."

I get a poptart out of the cabinet by the fridge and make myself some chocolate milk before going into the living area to watch a movie or something. Scrolling through Netflix, I settle on Hush and sit back with my poptart. The movie's not that bad; a deaf woman living in a secluded house with very few neighbors gets targeted by a serial killer who almost kills her but she manages to kill him first. The killer is pacing around the house and she's losing blood quickly in the kitchen. Just as she's thinking up possible outcomes, however, a knock on the door brings me out of it and I hit pause.

"Hold on, I'm coming!"

I make a quick detour to the trash to throw away my poptart wrapper before opening the door and raising an eyebrow. "How did you know where I live?"

"Hello to you too, Bella." Jasper chuckles, patiently waiting in the doorway. "You gave Rose your number and address, remember? But if I'm not welcome in, I can just go."

"No, it's not that. How did you make it past Eliza's "defenses?" She said they were rigged up pretty great."

Jasper chuckles again and walks inside when I step out of the way. "I was in a war, Bella, or did you forget about that? Finding my way past enemy lines is what I used to do for a good part of my life."

Smirking, I sit on the couch and Jasper sits next to me. "Enemy lines, huh? I'm the enemy now?"

"Your sister seems to think we are and by that logic, if we're your enemy you must be ours." The joking light in his eyes makes me let out a small laugh. I never spent much time with Jasper, so I'm surprised with how at ease I feel with him. He can't use his gift on me because of my Reaper gene, meaning this feeling is real and natural and it startles me a little. I never thought it would be this easy to feel comfortable with any of the Cullens but my dad's words ring in my mind and I let it happen.

After a few minutes of goofing off and joking, I look at his bright gold eyes; the color indicating he fed before coming. "In all seriousness though, why are you here?"

"We were worried about you. Your brother almost ripped Edward to pieces and your sister burned him but good when he tried to make them let him see you so he went off to sulk. Probably to Carlisle and Esme in an attempt to make them uproot and leave again. But Alice, Rosalie, Emmett, and I have already decided that we'd rather leave the coven than be lead around by a pompous, spoiled brat and a man who gives into whatever said brat wishes." He lets out an unnecessary breath and runs a hand through his shaggy blond hair. "As for why I'm here, I figured that Emmett wouldn't be able to get past flaming defenses and if Emmett gets hurt, Rosalie will be on a warpath for your sister and Alice can't see you or your siblings so she'd end up getting hurt. We all wanted to make sure you were okay and unharmed."

I feel the pad of his thumb under my eye and realize silent, traitor tears are falling yet again. Why am I crying? This is ridiculous. "That's sweet of you, really." That's when I remember that Jasper's an empath. He'd have some idea why I'm feeling this way if it's emotional. "Hey, Jasper?"

"Yeah, darlin'?"

"What does the mating pull feel like?"

The question seems to trip him up a little but he quickly recovers and hums. "The mating pull only occurs when you've been near your mate before. It's like…a weight is placed on your heart and the only way to alleviate the pressure is to be near your mate. That's before the mating bond is complete; where you accept your mate and your mate accepts you and then you mark each other. After the mating bond is complete, you feel whole and the weight is lifted. At least, that's what I gathered from Rose and Emmett. I haven't found my mate yet so I wouldn't know for sure."

Nodding, I gesture to the movie and he nods. We finish watching and just as the police arrive, the door opens and my siblings file in. Eliza's the first one to notice Jasper and she doesn't seem happy with his presence. "Did you take down my security measures?"

"He found his way through on his own. You have to remember, Jasper used to be in the military so it's pretty hard to keep him away from something he wants." I look at my sister, smirking slightly at the irritated look she's adopted.

Hunter raises an eyebrow. "And you're something he wants?"

"Just to make sure she's okay and still alive. Believe it or not, I do care about her." Jasper says, his tone sharp.

Before anyone else can respond, his phone goes off. "Hello?...Alice, slow down, even I can't understand you…Yes, I'm okay…I'm with Bella, that's probably why…What? Hold on, let me ask her." He turns to me and motions to the phone. "Alice wants to know if she's welcome here for a little while. She says she's been having visions of Edward all day and she's accomplished the impossible by getting a migraine. Maybe being around you will cancel out her gift for a while and give her some peace."

"It's worth a try." I nod, my heart skipping a little at the thought of seeing Alice so soon after my epiphany.

Jasper leaves the room to talk to Alice while Bash and Hunter head to their rooms, leaving me sitting on the sofa with an upset Eliza. "You could've said no; you know that right…"

With a sigh, I rest my head against the back of the sofa and close my eyes. "I don't think I'll be saying no to anything involving Alice…"

I can practically feel her eyebrow raise so I decide to brush it off. "She used to be my best friend and even though she hurt me, I still care about her a lot. It'll take time, but if she's willing to try, then I'm sure we'll get back to where we were before all of this."

"I just don't wanna see you get hurt again."

"I know, sweetie. But you're not always gonna be able to protect me. Besides, it's my job to protect you, not the other way around." I roll my head to the side and open my eyes to look at her, a small smile on my face as her nose scrunches up at the thought of being a damsel in distress.

Whatever she's about to say next doesn't have a chance to leave her mouth as a knock on the door sounds through the house. "Did Jasper take down your stuff?"

"I guess…anyways, go answer the door. She's your company anyway."

Flicking my little sister's forehead, I make my way to the door and take a deep breath before opening it. "Hey, Alice."

That's the end of Chapter 4. If there's anything you wanna see in Chapter 5, let me know. Also, X Blue Eyed Demon X gave me the idea to put Jasper and Eliza together and I'm on board but I wanna know who else would be. I tried to incorporate some realism because I've been writing for the Pitch Perfect fandom lately (nothing published) and it's something that, if done properly, really boosts the quality of a supernatural fic, in my opinion.