he being of all that is capable in human perfection, aka Percy Jackson, the stupid but really really hot school LAD walked down the corridor, his sea-green, glittering orbs of beauty shimmering in the reflection from the overhead lights.

Oh, I worshipped the very ground he walked upon, like many of the other girls in the school. It was pointless though. Rachael and Reyna were his current girlfriends of the week: they had to timeshare, obviously. Neither of them were worthy of having him for a whole day.

I'd be worthy. Oh Percy. Why can't you just see how I'm the one who understands you? What if you just noticed me? But no. He likes tall, skinny girls with blonde hair and—

Wait. I'M A SKINNY TALL GIRL WITH BLONDE HAIR AND EYES. Eyes that can truly see how perfect he is.

I JUST NEED TO BE MORE PERFECT.

I NEEDED… A MAKEOVER.

Grabbing the nearest gay next to me I screamed in his face "NIKKI"

"It's Nico." The fabulous gay with pink hair and sparkly jeans sang, raising a perfectly arched eyebrow.

"Whatever, god of the dead." I told him. His father was head master of the school, hence my newly created and flawless nickname for him. Since you know. We're all emotionally dead here. Except Frank, a person SilverCarstairs considers to be the embodiment of all that is flawless. Plus he's ginger, which is always a bonus. Anyway, back to plot line. "I need a makeover."

"Yas Queen!" Nico exclaimed.

"Yeah, I… need to be noticed."

"Of course bae, I get you. These eyebrows are tinted for one man and one man only— I've had a crush on that Jackson fellow for years."

SMACK.

I slapppeedddd that sexy muffafucker in his perfectly contoured and strobed face. "PERCY IS MINNNNE" I screamed, grabbing a knife from my ex-boyfriend, Luke, who just happened to be walking past. With a knife. Like all middle class Manhattan public school AM-I-RITE.

BUT IT WAS ALRIGHT BECAUSE AN EVEN SEXIER MO-FUCKKER DAT GODDAMN HUNK OF ASS AKA MA MAPLE SYRUP LEAF SMOL BEAN jumped into the situation and saved us all from dying.

I luv him very much and im really sorry but I cba arsed writing any more.

"WAIT!" Percy called, running over! "You there, reader! You're who I really love! You have a wonderful smile, and I wish I could see it more often! Would you do that for me?"

Annabeth …. This story is a POV, crap…

I looked over at Percy in shock. "What reader! We're all dyslexic!"

"I'm not!" Pointed out that Canadian being of wonder.

"Shut up dude, I'm talking." Percy scowled. "Anyway. You know how much I love your smile! Please beam it out for me like a ray of sunshine. No, don't force it! Be natural! You and confident! If you don't know what to smile at, may I suggest that you read SILVERCARSTAIRS and IAMNEMESIS' stories! Because they are (retrospectively) Smol beans and toll beans and I love them. They are lil' cinnamon rolls. Too good for this world. Too pure."

CONFESSION TIME. I, SilverCarstairs, (yeah sorry I literally totally hacked Iamnemesis' account and I'm literally not sorry) have NEVER READ THE PJO SERIES. Well I read like half of the first book in 2014 but… anyway!

If you're a fan of properly well written stuff, then check out anyone who isn't Iamnemesis or Silvercarstairs.

Like Sherlock and PJO? Look for Iamnemesis.

Infernal Devices, mortal instruments or hunger games? SilverCarstairs, if you will!