WHAT?! A new chapter of LOVE HANDLES?! Well, yes and no. This is an advertisement, but since it's against the website's rules to have a chapter that is only an author's note, it's also an extra chapter of sorts. First things first…drumroll please…

LOVE HANDLES IS NOW ON YOUTUBE!

A talented voice cast has been assembled and is bringing life to all of your favorite characters. There is also some simple animation to give spice to the visuals. Definitely check it out—since it's in a different format, some parts have been rewritten, there is less narration, and there is more dialogue.

If you'd like to relive the fairytale, visit my profile and click on the link at the top. If the link isn't there, search for my profile "twilitprincess" on Youtube. Click on it and it should be there.

Enjoy and make sure to leave a comment!

As for the chapter you're about to read…once again, I joked about a strange pairing and my sister dared me to write a sequel. I have no plans for a full-blown sequel because I feel it wouldn't live up to the original, plus I don't want to become known for writing crack pairings (even though I totally make them work). But I thought of a scene that was just too good to pass up. And who knows, this might even be voiced sometime down the road.

Please enjoy this extra chapter! I call it…Chicken Wings. Hope it makes you laugh!

Palutena paced the length of her room, twirling her staff in her hands. Every so often she would reach for the phone on her bedside table, think better of it, and return to pacing.

Why was she so nervous? It was just Wii Fit Trainer! They were friends. Of course, she had done nothing but mock her relentlessly about her crush on Wario…they hadn't even spoken since the ball took place, a week ago. But there was an apology in order. That, and Palutena needed advice. Love advice. And after seeing the other girls' reactions to Wii Fit Trainer's love for Wario, the fitness trainer might be the only one who would understand her predicament.

Palutena took a deep breath, summoning her courage. It's just a silly little phone call—you're a goddess! You can handle this. The thought made her smile. She picked up the phone and input Wii Fit Trainer's number with confidence.

The phone rang twice. Then a harried voice answered. "Hello?" There was a strange sound in the background. It sounded like a motor running.

"Wii Fit Trainer!" Palutena exclaimed. An apology died in her throat. Oh, why was apologizing to mortals so hard? Instead of doing so, she blurted out, "How are you?"

"Palutena?" Even through the phone, Palutena could sense the annoyance radiating from her friend. "Why are you calling me? Is something wrong?"

"N-No…I mean, nothing serious. I'm just looking for a little bit of…advice."

"What sort of advice?"

"Love advice." Palutena nearly choked on the word.

There was a long silence on the other end. Palutena almost thought Wii Fit Trainer had hung up on her. But then her tired voice sighed in her ear. "I'm not so sure I'm the best one to give love advice. I don't have a great deal of experience. Besides, I'm busy right now—I'm going to Mount Wario."

"You're going to WHAT?!"

"I'm going to a resort in the mountains with Wario!" Wii Fit Trainer snapped. "So please don't call me again after this."

"Oh," Palutena said faintly. "Wario's there?"

"He's sleeping right now." Wii Fit Trainer paused and Palutena heard the sound of the motor again. Wait, no—it was Wario snoring. Palutena bit back a chuckle of amusement. "I suppose I can talk for a little bit," Wii Fit Trainer sighed. "So what's wrong? You and Cloud aren't quite clicking?"

The memory of Cloud at the ball came to mind. He looked so sharp in that tuxedo, sharper than his goliath sword. His silken blonde hair was unlike anything Palutena had ever seen. And yet…and yet…

"Yes, I went to the ball with Cloud since he asked me," Palutena said quickly, forcing out the truth. "But there's someone else I like and I don't quite know what to do about it."

"Who is he?" Wii Fit Trainer asked curiously.

Palutena's throat closed with embarrassment. She couldn't bring herself to say it.

"Okay, you don't need to tell me. After all, I've been in your shoes before," Wii Fit Trainer said, understanding. "How about you describe him for me instead?"

Just the thought of her love made Palutena's heart grow warm. Her eyes misted over with memories. "Well, he's big and round…" she said dreamily. "He has the prettiest eyes and the cutest smile…oh, and he's got an appetite like you wouldn't believe—"

"It's WARIO?!" Wii Fit Trainer erupted suddenly. The sound of the motor cut off. "And you made fun of me! You said I should be purified!"

"No, no, it's not-!"

"Who ya talkin' to, babe?" Wario's voice asked casually.

"No one," Wii Fit Trainer answered curtly. Click! The line went dead.

Palutena uttered a short, frustrated sigh. "I wasn't talking about Wario," she told the empty room. Just the thought of dating Wario made her feel nauseous. But she supposed she wasn't one to judge. That's what Peach kept saying—that they shouldn't judge others.

Just then, there was a loud knock on the door. "Who is it?" Palutena asked, daring to hope it might be him. She opened the door and blinked back her surprise. "Oh! Hello, Cloud."

"Hey." Cloud looked her up and down. "You look nice today."

Palutena couldn't resist running a hand through her long hair and grinning. "Thank you," she giggled. "May I ask what brings you by?"

Cloud puffed his chest out with confidence and lifted his chin. His gray-blue eyes were serious. "Well…it's been a week since the ball…"

"Yes?"

"And I know I already told you this, but I just wanted to say it again: I had a great time."

"So did I," Palutena said warmly.

"And I was wondering if you'd like to…make our relationship more…official."

Palutena's smile dropped away. She stared at Cloud, wide-eyed with astonishment. She could feel her heart sinking in her chest. "You want to make us official?" she echoed, dazed.

"Yes. So what do you say?"

At the end of the day, Meta Knight could always be found in the lounge on the western side of the mansion. The setting sun's rays would filter in through the room's gigantic glass windows, bathing the entire room in an orange glow. Perfect for reading, unless a group of rowdy youngsters should decide to invade.

But all was quiet as King Dedede waddled down the hall towards his destination. That is, until he drew closer to the room and heard a sole, high-pitched voice tittering away. That voice definitely did not belong to Meta Knight.

Dedede paused just at the entrance to the lounge. There was Jigglypuff, wearing a huge red ribbon and leaning stiffly against the doorframe. The penguin king felt a flash of annoyance that she was in his way and was tempted to punt her like a soccer ball; like he did to Kirby whenever the pink puffball was in his way. Instead, he forced himself to stop and listen.

"—and I just love to dance!" Jigglypuff blabbered away. "It's um, a shame we don't have these balls more often b-because I'd love an excuse to dance more!" She forced a very awkward laugh. "Wh-What about you, Mety? I bet you'd be a great d-dancer if you just let loose a little! Y…You're s-so cool already!"

Meta Knight was sitting on a great red armchair by the window, two sizes too big for him. An open book sat in his lap. His amber eyes were glued to the page. They did not so much as flicker in Jigglypuff's direction.

King Dedede cleared his throat. Jigglypuff flinched violently and whirled around. When she saw it was Dedede, she relaxed a fraction and called back to Meta Knight, "A-Anyways, I need to go…powder my nose. B-Bye Mety!"

With that, she scuttled from the room while King Dedede wondered: what nose?

But Jigglypuff's lack of a nose was quickly forgotten. He had more pressing issues to attend to. The penguin entered the room and plopped himself down on a plush couch across from Meta Knight. He kicked his feet up on the coffee table and grunted loudly, "You're so smooth with the ladies, Meta Knight. How do you do it?"

For a few seconds, there was no response. Meta Knight's eyes flicked to King Dedede. Back down to his book. Back to Dedede and then around the empty room. "…Are you talking to me?"

"Who do you think I'm talking to?!" King Dedede exploded. "You're the only one here, I ain't talkin' to myself!"

"I'm reading," Meta Knight said in his deep voice, fixing Dedede in a cold yellow glare. Any other smasher might have been intimidated and left the room as soon as possible, but not Dedede. He knew Meta Knight well.

So he prattled on without fear. "I've noticed how girls always giggle when you walk by. At first I thought they were gigglin' cause they couldn't handle me! But eventually I realized it was all for you." He frowned deeply, eyeing his old frenemy with suspicion as though he had a disturbing hidden motive.

Meta Knight closed his book with a sigh, knowing he wasn't going to get any reading done with King Dedede around. "I suppose it's the mask," he said with a note of amusement. "Women are attracted to that air of mystery—"

"Nah, I tried wearing a mask and everyone thought somethin' was wrong with me. It's because you're cute."

"I am NOT cute," Meta Knight growled, pounding his little fist on the arm of his chair.

"Sure, sure," Dedede said, waving a hand. "Anyways, I need some love advice…"

Meta Knight's eyes narrowed behind his mask. "What makes you think I am qualified to give you love advice? I am not in a relationship."

Dedede blinked. "What about that lil' hot mama that was just in here, singing your praises?"

Meta Knight continued to squint at Dedede, looking befuddled.

The penguin refrained from face palming. "In case you forgot, her name is Jigglypuff."

Still, Meta Knight's expression did not change. "I am not in a relationship with Jigglypuff."

King Dedede's jaw dropped in shock. "What! I thought you went to the ball together!"

"Jigglypuff often tries to speak with me, but I cannot understand what she is saying most of the time. I believe she suffers from a severe speech impediment. Did she really ask me to the ball?"

"Oh, Whispy Woods have mercy," King Dedede groaned. "First of all, Jigglypuff doesn't have a speech impediment, I'm sure she's just nervous talking to you because she likes you! Second, she went around telling the entire mansion and their grandmother that she was going to the ball with you, so either she was lying or you said yes in some form. Third…why'd you even go to the ball if you thought no one asked you?! It doesn't seem like your kind of thing."

"On the contrary, something always goes wrong at special events such as these. I was on standby with my sword, waiting for evil to rear its ugly head." Meta Knight's eyes gleamed at the thought of battle.

King Dedede couldn't resist rolling his own eyes. "Of course," he said sarcastically.

"Also I am rather partial to those little macaroons that Ganondorf brings every year."

Dedede hopped to his feet, throwing his arms up in a gesture of defeat. "I don't even know why I bothered talking to you about this. If anyone should be looking for love advice, it's you." The king turned and began making his way out of the room.

"Not interested," Meta Knight said, reopening his book. "Good luck with Palutena."

King Dedede froze with one foot out the door. Very slowly, he turned around. "What did you say?" he whispered.

"I said I am not interested in a relationship—"

"No, no! The second thing!"

"Good luck with Palutena?"

King Dedede shot across the room and was instantly before Meta Knight. He grasped the knight's cape, bunching it up in his fists. "Who told you?!" he hissed, glaring Meta Knight right in the eye.

"No one told me," Meta Knight said, maintaining his calm. "Any fool with half a brain could tell if they just looked. Now let me go or I will make you."

King Dedede did as he said. He stumbled over to the window and put one hand on it, leaning against it for support. He gazed outside in a rather dramatic fashion, his eyes clouding with memories. "I never thought much of Palutena," he murmured. "When we first met, I didn't even bother remembering her name. She was just another peon to me. I didn't realize that she was actually a goddess."

Meta Knight was observing the ends of his wrinkled cape, twisting it in his hands. "Now I have to iron this," he grouched under his breath.

"Then we really met. I had just come home with the XXXL bucket of chicken wings from Triple D's and I wanted someone to watch me eat it. It was past midnight. Kirby was asleep and I knew you would never go for it…so I convinced Palutena to."

"I'm glad you know me well enough to realize I do not enjoy the sport of watching you eat," Meta Knight snorted.

"So she was watchin' me get all greased up with these chicken wings. And my words were smooth like butter. I was incredibly charming, just like I always am! Then she says, 'how about dinner and a show' and she pulls out her staff and just starts—"

"I did not ask for your entire life story," Meta Knight snapped irritably. "Just get to the point."

Dedede's expression saddened. He came away from the window and sat down heavily in the couch across from Meta Knight. "The point is, I thought we had a good time, but contact fizzled after that and she wound up going with Cloud to the ball. But…"

"But?"

"But that night, we shared one dance. It gave me back my hope, but it's been a week and again, nothin'! I'm not sure where to go with this. Since you and I are friends, I thought—"

"Acquaintances."

"Fine. Since we're acquaintances—"

"Colleagues."

"I wanted to ask you to be my wingman."

King Dedede gritted his beak and waited for Meta Knight's answer. There was nothing but a long silence in response.

Then Dedede thought of something and began chuckling. "Hey," he said, getting up to try and poke at Meta Knight. "Hey, take out your wings so I can make the joke properly."

Meta Knight avoided Dedede's large yellow hand and jumped to the ground. "I'm leaving." He started towards the exit.

"No, wait! Come on, Meta Knight. I know we don't always see eye to eye, but I'm on my knees begging here!"

"You are not," Meta Knight said without looking back as Dedede pursued him down the hall.

"Figuratively, I am!" King Dedede put on his best puppy dog eyes, but still didn't get down on his knees. After all, he was a king. He would bow to no one.

"Do you even know what figuratively means?"

"More or less! Come on, Meta Knight, I need you!"

To his surprise, Meta Knight stopped short. He turned around and faced Dedede, who was daring enough to stick out his lower beak in an attempt to look even more pathetic. For a long moment, Meta Knight just stared at him, his expression unreadable behind his mask. Dedede imagined all of the insults that were boiling just beneath the surface. He braced himself for when they were burst forth and scald him. He never could have imagined what Meta Knight would say next.

"I accept."

"YES!" Overjoyed, King Dedede sprang straight up into the air and landed with a resounding boom. "I knew you couldn't say no to your king!"

"You are not my king," Meta Knight said flatly. "I will do it because I am bored. But on one condition: payment."

King Dedede deflated ever so slightly, hoping Meta Knight didn't know about the stash. He rushed to distract him. "Oh yeah, money! No worries, I've got tons! And you'll need it since you're always crashin' that Halberd of yours. Haw haw!" He guffawed loudly, hoping that he was in the clear.

But Meta Knight was a bird dog that had already caught the scent of his prey, and there was no leading him astray. "I know you hoard sweets in your room."

Dedede flinched as though he'd been punched in the gut. "Aw c'mon, Meta Kni—"

"I want half."

King Dedede felt a tear come to his eye, thinking of his stash being cut in half. His mind raced to think of a way to cheat Meta Knight out of this, to open up a loophole he could climb into later. But then he realized that if all of this worked out, he'd wind up with something far sweeter than sweets in the end.

Meta Knight held out his gloved hand, offering it to Dedede.

King Dedede winced as he took it and shook it. For Palutena. "You drive a hard bargain, but you've got yourself a deal," he told Meta Knight.

"Very well." Meta Knight unsheathed his sword and began cleaning it with a cloth. "So I'm to assassinate Cloud so that he will no longer stand in your way."

"WHAT! I never said that!"

"Is that not the job of a wingman?" Meta Knight's wings flapped out on either side of him and his eyes shone with humor at his stolen joke. "Do not worry. No one will even realize he is gone, I promise you that. Do you remember the little mii from when we first moved into the bigger mansion? The one who ran about wearing one of my masks, shouting that he was me?"

King Dedede scratched his chin, pondering. "Now that you mention it, yeah! I haven't seen him around for months. Whatever happened to that guy?"

"Exactly." Meta Knight sheathed his sword and turned to go.

"Wait, Meta Knight." King Dedede put a hand on his shoulder to stop him. "I think the others might notice if Cloud disappears. Just a hunch."

"Then what would you have me do?"

"I dunno. Can't you just throw on a leather jacket and some sunglasses and start harassin' Palutena so I can swoop in to save the day?"

Meta Knight's eyes were slits. "I'm not doing that."

"Please, Meta Knight! I'm on my knees, begging—"

"Stop saying that!" Meta Knight snapped. "It would be a lot more effective if you actually did it instead of saying it."

Dedede's shoulders slumped. He hung his head in defeat. "Look…" he mumbled. "There's not a whole lot I care about in life aside from myself—"

"You don't say."

"—but I care about this." Dedede met Meta Knight's eyes, resolve hardening his features. "All my life I felt like I was out of everyone's league and now I've found someone who comes close or…may even be out of my league, as difficult as it is to admit it. I have no idea what to do! I need some guidance. I need someone who's got my back."

Meta Knight sighed deeply. And instead of sassing Dedede, he decided to take his plight seriously. "Fine," he declared. "I will help you in any way that I can."

"Thanks, pal." Dedede smiled, but something still weighed heavily in his chest. He sat on the ground, sighing. Meta Knight stood by his side, looking at him curiously. "Even so…" the penguin said, "I'm not so sure it'll turn out in my favor. After all…what's a king to a goddess?"