Damien's POV

I was in my bedroom, playing Life is Strange, and listening to the mournful wails of damned souls, when my door burst open.

"DAMIEN YOU SON OF A GUN!"

Letting out a slight cluckle, I turned on my swivel chair to look at the owner of the voice; Kenny McCormick.

"So, where's the baby? Are you hiding her in your hoodie or something?" I asked.

"No! Why didn't you tell me that the baby's father is Eric Cartman?" He demanded, with his fists clenched at his sides, and his face as red as my father's ass.

"Because, you didn't ask."

"Why would that fact even cross my mind?" He scoffed, "As far as I knew, Wendy was only ever intimate with Stan and Kyle!"

"Obviously not, anyway, do you have the baby or not?" I asked with a sigh, beginning to lose my patience. I needed that baby ASAP if I planned on raising her the right way.

Oh yes, they would ALL be sorry for the way they made fun of me when I first moved to that ignorant town full of infidels!

Sure they had let me into their friend group in the end, but at that point, it was too late! I had already deemed them my enemies for life.

I couldn't help but to smile as I imagined it, the offspring of Cartman and Wendy being raised in Hell by the son of Stan.

When it would be time for her to be released, she would unleash pure chaos on earth!

I raised my hands in the air, and started laughing manaically.

"What is so funny?" Kenny demanded, bringing me out of my fantasy.

I stopped laughing and sighed.

"Look, it's either the baby or Karen, you have twenty-four hours."

Craig's POV

"You really have to snap out of this whole wanting revenge thing, I have a great therapist I could reccommend you, she has helped me a lot."

I sighed and rolled my eyes.

"It's kind of hard for me to see a therapist while I'm in jail, Tweek."

"I know, ugh, I just want to help you." He said, twitching slightly, just like he used to do a year ago. Maybe his therapist wasn't as good as he said.

No, she was great. I shouldn't take it out on her just because I was miserable.

Before he started seeing her, Tweek could barely form a sentence without freaking out, and now, he was just like everyone else, almost.

"I know, it's just, I am so sick and tired of people telling me to move on, and that Kyle wouldn't have wanted me to get revenge, and all this other bullshit!" I shook my head, "Have you met him? He's stubborn as hell, I mean, it gets annoying sometimes, but it's one of the things I love most about him, I mean-"

"Craig." Tweek cut me off.

I responded my flipping him off, but I didn't say anything, I knew it would probably go through one ear and out the other, just like everyone else.

"You keep referring to him in the present tense, he's gone dude, you have to let him go."

I shook my head.

"I can't let him go, there's still a chance that he can come back to me, I'm not going to give up on him that easily!"

"Getting him back involves giving the the child of Eric Cartman to Damien to be raised in the underworld, do you have any idea what will happen man? It will be hell on earth!"

He was right, I knew he was, and it wasn't just his paranoia talking.

There had to be another way, there had to be a way to get Kyle back, without letting Damien have the baby, I just didn't know what it was yet.