A/N: This is somewhat of a prequel to my other story, "No Roads Where We're Going," although the two stories are independent. Mugen's experiences in "Perspective Evolution" shape his outlook going into "No Roads."
Perspective Evolution
...
I'm goin' fuckin' crazy and it's only been a couple weeks.
That manipulative little brat should've run away the minute I walked into that tea house. She's seen what I do to guys who cross me. Why ain't she afraid? She's too damn curious, too innocent. Got too much faith in people.
Why does she trust me? Ain't nobody ever trusted me before, for good reason. I steal, I cheat, I fight dirty, and I kill. Somebody tries to take what's mine, and they're dead, no questions asked. I'll cut down an unarmed man if he's got something I want. Shit, I'll attack just 'cause I'm bored. Why the fuck not? I don't give a shit who gets hurt, long as it ain't me. Everybody else can screw off.
So why the hell does this whiny girl want me for a bodyguard? What makes her think I ain't gonna hurt her or take advantage of her? Or steal whatever she's got and leave her ass? She's so damn clueless, she'd make an easy target.
Why does she think I'm gonna protect her? I fight for me, and me alone. I don't fight for her. Apparently she's too stupid to figure that out. Moron. She's damn lucky I've already saved her butt as many times as I have.
How'd I end up doin' this shit in the first place?
Goddamn coin toss. For what?
Something about a promise... a life debt. Idiot girl thinks she saved our lives.
What a bunch of bullshit! She didn't do a damn thing for me that I couldn't do for myself. Who does this stupid bitch think she is, orderin' me around like a trained lapdog? I ain't nobody's pet.
Then there's this asshole with the glasses and the fishy face. Who the hell wears glasses anyway? If the dumb broad hadn't interrupted our fight with her stupid fuckin' coin toss, this guy'd be a rotting corpse and I'd be on my way. Now I've gotta keep travelin' with this ugly son of a bitch until we find the girl's "Samurai Who Smells of Sunflowers"... or until I can kill him and ditch her.
I will kill him. I refuse to be defeated by this arrogant, stuck up, prissy, so-called samurai. He's too proper, and too damn quiet. He's always lookin' down his nose at me. Makes my blood boil. He ain't no better than me.
Eventually I'm gonna catch the superior bastard off guard and I'm gonna gut him like a fish. He won't even see it comin'. I'll tear him down to bloody shreds if it's the last thing I do. Then I'm outta here and this loud-mouthed girlie's on her own.
...
It's been three months. Most annoyin' three months of my life. We been all the way to Edo and didn't find squat. What a joke that was. Now she's draggin' us all the way to Nagasaki. I don't know how far that is, but it doesn't matter... if we ain't there tomorrow, it's too fuckin' far.
What am I still doin' with these dumbasses?
This bitch never stops naggin', and she's always gettin' into some shit and expectin' me to save her scrawny ass. How'd she survive on her own? She can't even walk down the street without gettin' into trouble. Then she blames it on us, like it's my fault she's too innocent to know when someone's scammin' on her. She needs to toughen up, 'cause I ain't gonna babysit her every hour of the damn day.
About all she's got goin' for her is her stubbornness. The girlie knows how to put up a fight, that's for sure. I don't know why I let her order me around. Anybody else woulda been dead a long time ago. Bossy little brat.
Why haven't I killed the ugly four-eyed fairy yet? And why am I the only one savin' little miss princess every time she squeals for help? His ass don't do shit!
Case in point: Girl disappears for some "modeling" job. (Tch. As if.) I go out lookin' for her, while he spends all day playin' some damn board game! She'd be on a boat to Europe if it wasn't for me! (What difference does it make if he paid our boat fare to cross the river?)
I got lots more of examples where that came from.
I save her from a brothel, while he's just kickin' it at the gambling house. (Yeah, so she got herself out of the brothel. Big deal.)
Who was it that saved her from that amateur pick-pocket? Me! (She kinda got herself out of that one too. I just wanted to beat that dirty punk for takin' my money.)
And what about that checkpoint? Where was the superior shithead when I was... crap... what was I doin'? (...Okay, I don't know what happened at that checkpoint. The broad seemed kinda pissed off... )
What I'm sayin' is, if fish lips ain't watchin' out for the girl, then why is he even here? So he can strut around, lookin' all pretty with his stupid long hair? I should run him through just for that.
Next thing that happens, he gets attacked by some random asshole who wants to avenge their master. Says he killed the guy. What the hell is that all about? He obviously doesn't want to talk about it, which means he's definitely hidin' somethin'. But I gotta admit, I did enjoy watchin' him trounce that poser. The sorry son of a bitch got his ass handed to him.
Doesn't change the fact that the frilly glasses boy is an uppity bastard. The dude never talks unless it's got somethin' to do with "duty" or "honor". Bunch of useless crap if you ask me. Or else he's bitchin' about somethin' I'm doin' or sayin' that ain't up to his standards. I'm tired of him actin' so high and mighty all the time. He thinks everyone else is beneath him. Maybe he forgot that he's a disgraced ronin. He ain't even a real fuckin' samurai! He just likes playin' dress-up and havin' an excuse to act like a dick. I wanna slash that smug look right off a his damn fishy face.
I oughta just kill 'em both and be done with this shit.
...
How long have we been on the road now? Five, six, maybe seven months? Fuck, I don't care anymore. When's this gonna be over with?
I swear, every goddamn day this whiny brat needs help. If she ain't gettin' kidnapped, then it's "I'm hungry", "I'm tired", "I'm cold", "My feet hurt". Fuck! She never shuts up! Does she really think she's the only one who's hungry when we ain't eaten in three days? Get a clue, stupid bitch.
She's determined though, I'll give her that. We've been travelin' a long time and had a lot of shit slow us down, but she ain't givin' up on this thing. She still manages to get herself into some deep shit, but I keep savin' her, and we keep movin' down the road. Doesn't seem to phase her.
She's annoying as fuck when she argues, but it's entertaining to get her all riled up. Her face turns red, she stomps like a little kid, and she gets fire in her eyes. The girl can hold her own.
No broad's ever stood up to me before. She doesn't put up with my shit, and she ain't afraid to throw it back at me. Makes me wanna scream and tear my hair out most days, but I gotta hand it to her. Even the toughest bastards I ever fought couldn't stand up to me like she does.
Except for fish face here. How can anyone win an argument without sayin' a damn word? He pisses me off with his "Hmm's" and "Ah's". What the fuck is that supposed to mean? If I ask him a straight question, why can't he give me a straight fuckin' answer?
I had a lot of fun screwin' with him a while back. Guy can't catch a fish to save his life! Had a good laugh over that one. Even the little girlie was bustin' up. Then I stuck him with two of the ugliest whores I ever seen! Hope he enjoyed himself. Ha! He deserved it just for bein' a pompous asshole. That was a good day.
Or it would've been a good day if I didn't get my ass kicked by a chick! She was some kinda undercover ninja. She was hot too. But the bitch never put out! I paid good money to get laid, dammit!
The pretty boy and the loud mouth ain't never findin' out about that one.
The brat still hasn't told us who this flowery dude is. Tall, dark, and four-eyes is just as irritated as I am, and I know he's thinkin' the same damn thing. How're we supposed to find this guy when we got jack shit to go on? The girl's holdin' out on us. He knows it too, but he's still lettin' her drag his ass all over the country. If he ain't backin' down, then I ain't either. 'Sides, I gotta be around when this is done so I can kill the son of a bitch.
...
I lost track of time a long time ago, but the broad says it's been nine months. When the hell are we gonna get to Nagasaki?
So the sunflower dude is her father. What's she gonna do about it? Talk him to death? That's about all she's good for.
Nah, that ain't true. Girlie complains like nobody else, but she ain't as helpless as she looks. I've never seen her back away from a challenge. Even when she gets kidnapped, the stubborn brat fights tooth and nail, and never gives in. Maybe it's 'cause she knows we're comin' for her.
Four-eyes is watchin' out for her more now, like it's his goddamn mission in life.
Maybe that's somethin' we got in common...
He's better than me at talkin' to her. Pisses me off sometimes. I can't stand Four-eyes bein' better than me at anything. Bastard. But I don't know what to do with a blubberin' little girl. "Feelings" are for women and weak-ass pansies... like fishy-fishy four-eyed fish face!
Let's see, is he a woman or a pansy? "Hmm..."
He ain't neither. Dude's strong, and good with a sword. Never seen him back away from a challenge either. He's killed just as many as me. He might even be a bad-ass. But I still gotta kill him. I made a promise. Can't go back on it, even if I wanted to. (Do I want to? ... Screw that noise, I'm gonna beat his ass.)
Girlie still thinks she can stop us from fightin' each other. She thinks she's helpin' us. Doesn't want us to die. She's always tryin' to help people, even when she ain't gettin' nothin' out of it. I don't get it.
She's tried to save me more than once now. She's either jumpin' in front of me like a dumbass, or she's bringin' me back from the dead. No one ever risked their life for me. No one ever cared if I died. Why'd she do it? I been neck-deep in blood since I was old enough to pick up a tanto and gut an innocent man for his food, and I been stalked by the crow men for almost as long. There ain't no savin' me. I'm goin' to hell one way or another, don't make no difference if it's now or later. She's a dumb bitch if she don't see that.
Four-eyes ain't no different. Maybe he didn't start killin' as young as me, but he spent his whole life trainin' for it. He's soaked in blood just the same. He doesn't like to talk about it, but I know. I see it in him 'cause I know it in me.
Maybe that's somethin' else we got in common...
...
This is probably our last night. We should be at that island tomorrow. About fuckin' time.
Girlie's gone mental, or whatever Four-eyes said. She wants to talk about that "feelings" crap all of a sudden. Whatever.
Her mom died. She never talked about that before. That means she ain't got nobody, just like me and Four-eyes. Makes sense now why she wants to find her dad. I still don't get what she wants from him though. Seems like she just wants to kill the guy.
Four-eyes really did kill his master. Knew somethin' was up with him. There had to be a reason why he's a ronin, why he keeps gettin' attacked by random guys, and why he's so damn quiet all the time.
Girlie wanted me to say somethin' they don't already know about me. I got nothin' to say really. Never had no parents or a master. Never had any big life-changin' experience neither. Just bein' born into this world was enough to screw me over. It is what it is. Ain't nothin' worth talkin' about.
...
We finally get to this damn Nagasaki place, or wherever the fuck we are, and the stupid girl goes and leaves us behind. Left a stupid note and some sweet shit I never ate before. Should we go after her?
Fuck it, if Girlie thinks she can handle it on her own, then it's on her. My part in this is over, debt paid in full. Now I can go back to wanderin' free without all this shit to tie me down.
Right after I kill Four-eyes.
Except he doesn't seem to wanna fight anymore. Not sure if I do either. But a promise is a promise.
Hope Girlie's dad is on that island. It would suck if we came all this way for nothin'.
She's smart... She'll be okay.
...
Those motherfuckers took her! I gotta get to her. Can't this damn boat go any faster?
Four-eyes better not get himself killed, or I'll let the crow men haul me away just so I can kick his ass in the afterlife.
...
Goddammit, she's hurt. Look at her. This asshole with the eye patch is fuckin' dead! Nobody hurts her and lives.
This is all my fault. They wanted me, not her. And now she's tied up, bleedin' and bruised. She shouldn't even be here. She should be talkin' to her sunflower dude... her father.
I'm gonna get her out, no matter what I have to do.
"Look, I'll put down my sword, but in return, you gotta let go of the girl."
For shit's sake, I cut her ropes, and she's just standin' there.
"I ain't gonna die. Have some faith in me, will ya?"
Girlie, I swear to hell, you better start runnin' like your life depends on it. What's it gonna take to make her move her ass?
"Get lost. I said GO!"
...
Aw, Shit. Ugly wheelchair guy's packin' enough black powder to blow up the whole damn beach. There ain't no way I'm survivin' this. The crow men are comin' for me for the last time.
Four-eyes better've beat that shogunate son of a bitch. I hope Girlie found her father.
This is it...
...
"What? You guys again. I can't move my body. Looks like I finally bought it. It's been sweet."
"Mugen!"
What the ─?
It's Girlie... She brought me back again. How does she keep doin' that?
Four-eyes... Never thought I'd be so glad to see him.
But this ain't over yet. We still got a fight to finish.
"A promise is a promise. And you and I have some unfinished business to take care of."
This is stupid. It ain't even worth it. What's this gonna do to Girlie? She's gonna hate whoever wins, if we don't end up killin' each other.
It still has to be done.
...
It fuckin' figures our swords would shatter.
"We really suck."
"You got that right."
I understand it now. We've always canceled each other out. That's why neither of us can win. We're opposite, but the same. Two sides of the same coin. Or maybe two thirds of a whole... Girlie's the one who's held us together all this time. It's her we fight for.
She's safe. Don't matter what happens to us now.
I can't stand up anymore...
...
My whole body hurts. Where am I? This doesn't look like hell.
Is that Four-eyes? He's awake. Shit, he looks like I feel. He's got bandages all over him. So do I. Girlie must've patched us up.
Shouldn't I wanna kill him? I could do it. He's just layin' there, injured. I could reach over there right now.
But I don't want to. Even if I could, I wouldn't attack him unarmed and injured, without givin' him a chance to fight back.
"This is so weird. Up until now, whenever I met somebody who was tougher than me, I couldn't rest until I killed the guy. But for some reason... I don't know... I just don't feel like killin' you at all."
Huh. Friends... go figure.
...
Feels like summer again. Guess that means it's been about a year. This long-ass trip is finally over, and we're all movin' on.
I might actually miss these two. Four-eyes said we're his first friends. I know he meant it. Me and him both know that Girlie loves us, but I ain't sure if either of us really knows what that means. I suppose it means we're family. But I don't know what to make of that either. Four-eyes might get it. He's better with this shit than I am.
I never had family or friends before. Never thought I would. Never thought I needed it. Trustin' people almost got me killed more than once, and I can't respect anyone I don't trust. Nobody was ever worth it.
But they are.
It's so strange.
This annoying loud mouthed brat pushed and shoved me all over Japan. For some reason I let her. Why? It sure ain't because I wanted to make this journey. Goddamn torture listenin' to her naggin' and complainin' every day!
But I figured out how to get her back for all her whinin' and arguin'. When she starts gettin' that fire in her eyes like she ain't gonna budge, I just gotta embarrass her until she's got nothin' left to say. She runs out of steam eventually. It's so satisfyin' to shut her up. I'll deal with all of her bullshit just for that.
Girlie's strong, in her own way. She goes after what she wants. I don't think she's backed down from anything in her whole life. Shit, she stood up to us. She stood up for us. She never gave up, even after all the shit that went down. She was in it to the very end. Takes balls to do that. Takes courage.
She smiles a lot, even when everything is shit.
Her eyes light up when she laughs...
Dumb broad.
Then there's this silent son of a bitch ronin who I still can't beat in a fight. We came to an understanding a long time ago. It was simple: keep the girl safe. We never said it. We didn't need to; we both knew. He kept up his end. He killed that shogunate assassin and saved Girlie when I couldn't. Dude's tougher than anybody I ever met. I don't know what "honor" means exactly, but he lives by it.
He's loosened up some, but he's still too proper. Still pisses me off. "Hmm... Ah..." Bastard.
I've got him pegged, just like Girlie. I don't need to shut him up 'cause he never fuckin' talks anyway, but I can sure piss him off. He's even easier than she is. All I gotta do is say somethin' rude or insult his honor. Gets him every time! He thinks he's hidin' it 'cause he keeps a straight face, but he has a tell - that eyebrow twitch is a dead giveaway. Oh, man... if I can make Girlie speechless and get Four-eyes to twitch that eyebrow... nothin's better than that!
He doesn't look the same without those stupid glasses, but I'm still callin' him Four-eyes.
I wonder what he's gonna do now. I wonder what Girlie's gonna do.
Shit, what am I gonna do? I got no idea. Guess I'll just start walkin', see what happens. Maybe find somethin' new.
Don't know if I'll ever see Fuu or Jin again. Probably won't.
"Catch ya later!"
But maybe... Maybe one day fate will throw us back together.
Owari.
終わり