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GHOST IN THE MACHINE

by Child of Ragnarok

CHAPTER 1: The Man-Thing

I was headed for Theta, in a desperate bid to save me and everyone else from the WAU. The last I remember is cold, and wet, and the fear of what would happen when my dive suit inevitably failed, and the searing pain of that... thing... biting off my right arm and left foot, and then the darkness...

And then I snap back to reality. I mournfully watch my reflection in the nearest shiny thing (a battery pack compartment), seeing a face that used to be human, but is now just a jumbled mess of electronics, structure gel and implants, all with the same eerie blue glow. The WAU cobbled me together and brought me back to life... or something like that. Or maybe I'm just in hell. I don't know. And I weep for it.

I don't know how many times I've cried out for God to save me from this, this wretched existence. God never answered. Or maybe God is the WAU. I don't know anymore. I don't know if I care. And I weep for it.

I don't even recognize the voice that comes out of what I suppose is the WAU's artificial replacement for the vocal cords I no longer have. And I weep for it, with an unfamiliar voice.

The WAU left my mind intact. I can remember what I've done to those few poor souls who ventured near me. Something comes over me, takes over my brain, forces me to viciously attack every living thing that approaches me... And I weep for it.

Suddenly, I tense up and feel a sudden sense of hostility. Something is near me. I feel the pincer that now replaces my right hand involuntarily opening and closing in a threatening manner. I'm driven to turn around.

It looks humanoid, wearing a Theta dive suit, but a quick glance into its helmet reveals only a Cortex Chip. Looks like another of the WAU's attempts at playing God. It's holding a battery pack in its shaking hand – evidently, it came in here just for the battery. It must need the battery for something – it can't just have come in here randomly – but I can't tell what. Every bit of its body language radiates fear. I imagine the thing must be almost as afraid as I am.

The man-thing takes a hesitant step back and I feel an involuntary rage building up, the precursor to me losing all control of myself. "Don't!" I try to scream at it. "Stay away from me!" But my voice is distorted and I can't get the words out.

Immediately, I realize that it's the wrong thing to do, as the thing turns tail and begins to run. My voice box shrieks in fury. Within me, I shriek in anguish. I know what's about to happen, and I can't do a damn thing to prevent it.

Out of their own volition, my legs start running toward the entity, and my arms stretch out. I'm closing in, despite my best efforts to the contrary, my best efforts to stop myself, to get back in control of that hideous experiment of nature that's called my "body".

My pincer snags the thing's leg, and it – he – screams in pain and terror as he is tripped and falls onto the floor. I begin sobbing as I move to remove his helmet, unable to prevent myself from doing so, unable to tune out his desperate pleas for his life. "I'm sorry", I sob to him, "please forgive me, I'm so sorry, I can't help it..."

His helmet comes off from my ministrations, and I flip him over. His Cortex Chip head stares into my eyes, and his entire body tenses up in unspeakable fear. Apparently, the WAU is not quite done having its fun yet. A desperate cry – from him, from me, maybe from both of us – as I grab the Cortex Chip with my pincer. "I'm sorry, God, I'm so sorry, please forgive me..." My desperate pleas for his forgiveness mingle with his desperate pleas for me to stop, as my claw tightens ever so slowly, probably to serve as sick amusement for the WAU.

And then there's a crunch and the casing of the Cortex Chip gives way. A few sparks, a wisp of smoke, and the man-thing's pleading stops. Yet another senseless death, carried out through me by someone whose intentions I can't begin to comprehend. God. The WAU. I don't know. Maybe they're one and the same. I don't know.

The WAU's influence over me is released. He is apparently satisfied that the human thing is dead. I fall to my knees next to the human thing, grasping in vain at its slackened limbs, desperately begging for it to wake up, to forgive me, to understand... but it's all in vain.

And I weep.

Author's note:

For some reason, the Robot Girl (as the SOMA Wiki calls her) enemy in SOMA really got to me. At first, she scared the bejeebers out of me. Now, with some Fridge Logic in the baggage, she makes me more sad than scared. Some (me included) theorize that she's actually aware of what's going on and what she's become, but unable to control herself if provoked, and that's why she's crying while idle and tells the player to get away from her when she's alerted. So I figured I'd try to write this little piece from her point of view.