Traditions

A.N.: For natashasbanner on tumblr as a part of the Secret Santa gift exchange by hulkwidownet. Prompt: "Some holiday fluff, maybe their first Christmas together or something." Merry Christmas! :)

Natasha can't really say she ever actually celebrated Christmas – she never did, to be honest. There were no such things as holidays and Christmas at the KGB, and later it just never really mattered to her. She didn't have anyone to celebrate with, anyway, so it wasn't that big of a deal.

But, this year, things have changed drastically – and for the better, mind you. For the first time in what seems like forever, Natasha finally feels like she belongs somewhere; as if she has a place in the world. It's a strange feeling, but it's soothing and comforting in a way she's never felt before. She has a group of people around her whose trust she holds and earns day in and day out, whose friendships she cherishes in her heart carefully as if they're the most precious thing in the world – because they are.

It took time to let go of her opinion that love was for children (something she was thought to believe to be true) and to open herself and her heart to those around her. The beginning step was losing all her identities – losing all those masks she so carefully constructed for herself, a designation to stop being who people needed her to be and to try and find out who she wanted to be. Natasha has since found that making her own choices for herself was something incredibly refreshing, and she could now clearly see why people decided to form attachments and friendships; why they would allow themselves to become so fragile in front of others, especially in an emotional sense.

Though, to be honest, Natasha was kind of regretting all of that at this moment because – as previously stated – Natasha never actually celebrated Christmas, meaning that right now she found herself in a rare state of nervousness and even slight confusion, because even though the gifts were bought (a chore Natasha found much easier than she initially thought she would, maybe because of her impeccable skills of reading people; training for which Natasha was extremely grateful for this holiday season) and even her room at the Tower was decorated in suitable Christmas fashion (all courtesy of the incredible Pepper Potts), all of this was still uncharted territory; especially since this was the first Christmas she'll ever truly celebrate with someone she loves in every romantic meaning of the word.

It was the first Christmas she'll spend with Bruce Banner and that made Natasha both excited and nervous – feelings she wasn't quite used to, if we were being honest. But, as a true soldier, Natasha was determined to power through it and grab the handles of the situation quickly (even if she understood early on that Christmas in its essence was meant to be chaotic, with laughter and cheer filling every corner of the Tower), making sure that she's doing Christmas the right way – even if Maria did tell her that there is no right way to do Christmas; it's loud and unpredictable and crowded and although Maria tried to act annoyed by the whole thing during their short conversation, Natasha knew that Maria secretly adored the holiday, even if she was completely devoted to her work that Natasha sometimes wondered if the other woman ever took time off.

Natasha wanted to try and get into the whole idea of Christmas traditions – being a fan of consistency herself, she thought how maybe that would quickly become her anchor in the Christmas drama that was about to ensue if she believed all the stories (which she was keen on doing after previously witnessing a few Christmases at the Barton household that were usually brief on her part and interrupted by Natasha taking up a mission because contrary to popular belief, criminals did in fact work on holidays). And, apparently, Bruce's tradition consisted of hot chocolate and "It's a Wonderful Life" (a Christmas movie that was apparently a must, even if Natasha hasn't previously seen it).

So, on Christmas Eve, just as everyone finished dinner and parted ways – worn out by the Christmas party Tony decided to throw at the Avengers Tower (which, to be honest, everyone enjoyed, especially since this time it truly was a simple dinner party – although is anything ever simple with the one and only Tony Stark? - with close friends, something that they all decided should become a tradition from now on) – each going to their floors, Natasha went to her own room to change into something more casual (which meant getting out of heels and the red dress, and putting on simple sweats that made her feel incredibly relaxed already) before there was a knock on her door.

She opens them and smiles, looking at Bruce's comforting brown eyes that radiated happiness. Even though he was still rather awkward and shy in larger crowds – never truly being completely at ease – Natasha could tell that Bruce had a great night and that it would become a fond memory for him just as it will for her.

"Well, hello, Doc.", she greets him with a smirk and Bruce smiles back. She moves away from her door to the hallway, closing the doors behind her. They slowly start walking towards the cinema room, where they have decided to watch some of those Christmas movies that Natasha has been missing out on.

Bruce lifts his arm for her to take and Natasha finds it so incredibly cliché that she can't help but smile. "So, Natasha, are you ready to finally get the true Christmas experience?", he asks with a silly voice and Natasha shakes her head because damn, could he be any more of a dork? And how can he be so cute?

She takes notice of what he's wearing, and she can't help herself but make a comment. "That depends. Do I get my very own ugly Christmas sweater?", she pauses. "Because I'm incredibly jealous of yours."

Bruce laughs. "Damn it, you just guessed your present.", he jokes. "When you open it, do me a favor and act surprised."

"Sure thing.", she says, giving his hand a tight squeeze before they finally enter the movie room and part; Natasha going to take a seat as Bruce brings them two steaming cups of something Natasha guesses is hot chocolate. "You really do take your traditions seriously, Bruce.", Natasha says softly as she gently blows on the steaming drink before taking a sip.

"Oh, I take them extremely seriously, Ms. Romanoff.", he replies. "Last year Tony said he wanted no marshmallows in his hot chocolate and I almost had a Code Green right then and there.", he says and Natasha can only say that Bruce must be truly comfortable if he's making Hulk jokes. Christmas suits him, and Natasha wishes that it was every day of the year just so she could see him this relaxed all the time. She doesn't know if it's the fact that they're alone, or maybe even the hot chocolate, but she hopes that this won't be the last time before next Christmas that they do something like this.

"He doesn't like marshmallows in his hot chocolate?! WHY DOES HE HATE LOVE?", Natasha yells out in mock shock and Bruce almost chokes on his drink as he laughs.

"That's what I said!", he replies and they settle in their seats to watch the movie. The opening scene starts, and Natasha turns her head slightly to look at Bruce as their hands connect.

"So, what is so special about 'It's A Wonderful Life'?", she whispers. Bruce's reply is a cryptic smile.

"You'll see."

(130 MINUTES LATER)

(Natasha's eyes are still wet from all the tears. "If you tell Tony about this I will kill both of you."

Bruce is quick to reply, "My lips are sealed."

Natasha nods, still surprised at how emotional this film has made her. "Good.", she says. "Now get me some more hot chocolate."

Bruce jumps to his feet and grabs her empty cup, kissing her at the same time.)

If Natasha thought the time leading up to Christmas was hectic, then actual Christmas Day was on a completely different scale. Seriously. The S.H.I.E.L.D. base isn't in this much chaos even when it's under attack, and that's saying something.

So, when they have breakfast and exchange the gifts, Natasha is relieved as Bruce suggests they take a walk outside and is quick to accept.

Growing up in Russia, the cold never really bothered Natasha, so she is probably the only person in the city of New York that is walking out into the snowy cold weather with barely more than a light jacket and a woolen hat that she put on simply because it was a gift from Laura and she wanted to make her happy. Bruce, on the other hand, is carefully bundled up in a thick coat and a scarf, his head being free of a hat and letting his curls fly all over the place in the slight wind.

They get some coffee to go at a nearby coffee shop and then take a seat on the park bench, watching as the kids in the park play with the snow by making snowmen and having snowball fights.

"Thank you for last night.", Natasha says, even though she knows she doesn't have to thank him. She still does, though, because she wants him to know how much she appreciates it.

Bruce smiles at her. "I was my pleasure, Nat. Really.", he says. "It's been a while since I had a Christmas this good. And it's thanks to you.", he says and Natasha can feel her chest fill up with a special kind of warmth. Her smile brightens and she slides closer next to Bruce, grabbing him by his scarf and pulling him into a long kiss that leaves them both breathless.

"I adore you.", she says as their foreheads touch and she can see a light shade of green in his eyes as his pulse races from the heat of the kiss. Natasha smirks at the fact that she's able to make him go crazy with just a kiss. "Now don't go green on me."

Bruce smiles. "I've got a compelling reason not to lose my cool.", he says and this time he kisses her, although it's a much shorter kiss.

This, Natasha decides as she's looking at Bruce – feeling happier than she's ever been in her life and knowing he feels the same – the park bench and the coffee and the neighborhood kids playing in the snow and the light cold that makes their cheeks red and the kisses that leave her breathless are the kind of Christmas tradition she definitely wants to keep.

And she has a feeling Bruce does, too.