Hello. My new chapter was kind of problematic and it's because I had to rationalise Rhaegar's behaviour when I, personally, don't like this entire Rhaegar/Lyanna thing and I disapprove of their approach to the matter (even though I can understand Lyanna's behaviour); I also think that Prince was a bit mad about the prophecy.

Secondly, the thing is that I don't know when the next chapter will be published, if it will be published at all. I'm not sure whether my current beta will be able to help me and without her work it would not be as good of a story. And while my beta still helps me it's probably a matter of time before she will have to focus on other, more important things. I need to find a new beta and if you know an active one, please send me his/her nick on this site in PM so I could maybe reach out to them (I know that there is an official list, but I doubt that more than half of them are available). I will appreciate your help! Enjoy new chapter

Chapter 16

Rhaegar's confession

Rhaegar, suddenly unsure, took a deep breath. He was the King for a long time and he knew how to face many problems, but now it seemed that he lost the ability to speak. That's why he was delaying that conversation for so long- he simply didn't know how to put everything what happened into the right words. However, he had to at least try.

The children looked at him expectantly. "They are children no more", he thought, "but almost adults. They have to learn it from me or otherwise someone else will tell them. It's better if they hear it from me".

-The truth about what? The war?- asked Aegon.

-Yes, you need to know about the War of the Usurper, Robert Baratheon, and what really happened- replied Rhaegar, speaking with a hint of hesitation undetectable for anyone but Ellia. Since she wasn't there no one noticed.

-Ok, so what really happened?- asked, rather rudely, Daenerys.

-Firstly, you need to understand that it isn't easy for me. That is why I never speak about it, the truth is hard to accept- started Rhaegar but Dany wasn't in the mood to listen to someone beating around the bush, so she said harshly:

-Yes, we get it, you are hurt. Now can we go to the important part?

Everyone else were perplexed by her behaviour but the King's sister was too focused on finding out of what happened in the past- especially if that could endanger her relationship with Robb. That's why she couldn't just let go and had to push to dig the truth out.

-You're probably right, Daenerys- Rhaegar sighed and continued- Did you know that Eddard Stark, the current Lord Paramount of the North and Lord Of Winterfell had three siblings?

All of the young Targaryens shook their heads.

-Yes, it was necessary to keep this information from you to hide the truth- spoke Rhaegar with a calm voice and proceeded:

-You see, Ned Stark had two brothers once- Brandon and Benjen, and one sister, Lyanna- Rhaegar tried to hide the pain and regret but failed, and everyone noticed.

He urged the others:

-Before you judge me, remember that I was young- young, stupid and naive. I wasn't thinking clearly and I let emotions overwhelm me. I was the heir of the Kingdom and as such I should think about the consequences of my actions.

-What happened?- Rhaenys eventually muster the courage to ask that dreadful question.

Despite all those years, he still remembered her and when that question was asked, her image rose from the hidden corners of his heart- those tiny parts that still loved her. Rhaegar saw her thick dark brown hair again, her oval shaped face, her tall and slim figure. Above all else, he saw her lively grey eyes, so full of joy and happiness. Rhaegar remembered her when she was happy with him- even if that happiness didn't last long.

Rhaegar shook his head. It would do him no good if he dwelled on the past but it had to be done. That's why he took a deep breath and started his story:

-Everything began a long time ago, during the great tourney at Harrenhal.

Prince Rhaegar came to that important event late. The whole ceremony was supposed to be only a ruse, so that he could talk with important vassals. It was necessary, because his father was falling into madness more and more, and time had come to depose him. Rhaegar's plan was to gather vassals, make an agreement with them and overthrow his father together. It had to be done for the good of Westeros. Unfortunately, his father, while being insane, was not stupid- he showed up to the tournament and, in that way, sabotaged the Prince's plan. Rhaegar thought that it all was a waste of time, when the King decided to participate in the tourney. As it turned out, it wasn't as pointless as he predicted in the beginning.

He met that girl a while ago when he was greeting the Starks, and then she was practicing before the tourney. Prince caught her off guard during her sword training. She impressed him with her bravery and amused him with her rebellious nature (that last part was only in his mind). For two days they were meeting in secret- Rhaegar helped her prepare to the tournament and he wanted to keep it to himself. Even when, in the end, she decided not to participate, it was still worth it.

The dark-haired girl, or Lyanna, as she was called, repaid him by confessing to him, even when he was just a stranger to her. She told him about her brothers, her father Rickard and about her happy childhood in the North. Lyanna seemed happy talking about it but soon enough her attitude changed- she revealed that she was betrothed to Robert Baratheon, a young Storm's End lord, and it happened without asking her about her opinion. Speaking about it, she was unable to hide the bitterness in her voice. Rhaegar felt sorry for her- even when he lived in Vale, the tales about bawdy and randy heir of house Baratheon reached the Capitol.

It was a sad story but Rhaegar had his own to tell. He told her about the burden he felt because of all the expectations and responsibilities weighing on his shoulders, and how he was sick of it. He spoke about his father and his agonised mother who was unable to stop her husband from falling into madness. Eventually, he confessed that his wife's expectations killed his love for her, that he was unable to even look at her, and how their marriage, which started well, transformed into something nasty.

-I love her, I truly am, but I don't recognise her anymore. It's killing our marriage- Rhaegar told Lyanna. And she listened, really listened and didn't pretend like many other people. Rhaegar couldn't really understand it, but he sympathised with her when she told him that being a woman is horrible in the sense that if she was born a man she could do much more than just sit around and be pretty. Both had problems in their lives so they connected. The world wasn't fair and they couldn't do anything about it but at least they had someone to talk to who could listen and understand.

Rhaegar quickly discovered that he wanted more than a friendship. Following that feeling, he gave her a flower crown after he won the tournament but she was furious and she refused to talk to him at first. Soon, however, she forgave him, since she felt really lonely at home. They stayed in touch through letters (it wasn't an easy task but they had help) and were friends. However, even though he apologised Lyanna for making rushed advances, he still wanted her in a different, much more intimate manner.

-Seventeen years ago I organised a tourney in Harrenhal. All of more important lords showed up. The Starks also came- all of the brothers and Lyanna, while their father stayed at home.

Rhaegar turned to Daenerys and spoke directly to her:

-Yes, my sweet sister. I don't know where you heard it but it is true that Lyanna Stark was the reason of the whole Rebellion. It was a really trival matter- I fell in love with her.

The children were suprised, Aegon had a painful image on his face but it was Dany who was the most terrified. She stuttered:

-And then? What happened?

Some time after the Harrenhal tournament Rhaegar secretly travelled to the North. Before he left, he had a big fight with his wife and decided he had enough. Additionally, the letters which he receiving from Lyanna were increasingly hopeless and desperate. Her time to marry Robert Baratheon was coming fast and the Stark girl hated it. She had no desire to became the Storm's End lord's wife. When the Prince read the last letter something stirred within him and, on impluse, he hurriedly left the Captiol. He wanted to see Lyanna for the last time.

The journey was long and tiring but Rhaegar managed to reach Wintertown. He didn't come to the castle and he hid in town and send a message to Lyanna. He then stayed in the Winterfell Godswood and there he was waiting.

Late at night, she finally came. That day Lyanna was even more beautiful than in Harrenhal. She smiled at him and asked:

-My Prince? What brings you here?

-I came to see you- replied Rhaegar.

Lyanna laughed and told him:

-While I appreciate the gesture, it wasn't very wise. My father would be furious if he found out.

Rhaegar nodded and spoke again:

-So, soon you are getting married.

The Stark girl's gaze became blank and distant, and after a while she cracked up and started crying.

-Rhaegar, I don't want to. You saw him at Harrenhal, how he acted? So close to his betrothed. He may think he loves me but he is wrong- he just sees a pretty girl to fuck until he gets bored and moves to his next target. What am I going to do?- she sobbed loudly and continued- You know, I thought about suicide... I would be finally free... But then I thought about my father, my brothers, I couldn't do it!- she wailed and continued crying.

The Prince couldn't stand to see her hurt. He had to do something, so he took her into his arms and tighly hugged her. For quite a long time Lyanna was crying into his shoulder, staining his doublet with her tears but finally she calmed herself. She lifted her head and looked into his eyes and once again Rhaegar was enchanted by her. She looked young and innocent but there was a fire within her, something that he rarely saw in women. Her beauty, will and stubborness was a deadly combination for any man. And those eyes... His thoughts were interrupted when Lyanna rose on her tiptoes and kissed him. The Prince was suprised at first but then he responded with passion.

-Marry me- whispered Rhaegar when they parted.

Lyanna looked at him with hope and fear; she was conflicted.

-I can't- she finally replied- I quite like this idea but I can't... What would my father tell? And Brandon- you don't know him but he would do something stupid. And you are also...

-A Prince- Rhaegar finished for her and kissed her again- However, you know that I've had enough. I deserve to be happy. You deserve to be happy. Just this one time.

Lyanna still looked unconvinced.

-I meant that you are already married. What would your wife tell? What about your father- he's the King, after all.

Rhaegar face darkened, then he replied:

-I told you that I don't love my wife anymore. She can't give me what I need and treats me like a child. My father... well, once we marry he can't do anything. I am his heir and he will have to accept it.

-It doesn't change the fact that you are already married- observed the Stark girl.

-Yes, it's true. Forunately, more than once my ancestors married more than one woman- said Rhaegar but he stopped when noticing Lyanna's pale face.

-No! How dare you to suggest something like this. I have my own dignity, Prince, even though I am not a member of the royal family! You will not treat me like someone worse- I am not a Frey or another stupid woman from a minor house!

Rhaegar silenced her for a moment and spoke:

-Yes, by law Ellia is first and will always be the first. It doesn't matter for me. You didn't see how she treated me... after what I came through I will stay away from her as far as possible. After we marry it will stay this way- she cannot stand in the way of our happiness. Do you need more convincing?

Despite all of the efforts, Lyanna still didn't seem convinced. She looked like she wanted to do that but she was also afraid. Seeing her hesitation, Rhaegar added:

-You will see how they will react. They try to control our lives but now we will be able to forge our own destiny. And one more thing- you wanted adventure? I can provide it. You will not be confined within four walls with your only purpose to have children. Help me and let me help you!

Lyanna froze in place, deep in thoughts. After an agonizingly long moment, she nodded, smiled to Rhaegar and told him:

- Let's do it. Right here, right now, before the heart-tree. We have each other and the Old Gods as witnessess. That's all we need. And then... we have to escape- she added with hesitation.

Rhaegar smiled and kissed Lyanna. He knew that from now everything will get better.

It wasn't better. Everything became more complicated with time and nothing was certain. It was not a right time to dwell on the past, the teenagers had to hear his story. Rhaegar replied to Daenerys's question:

-I fell in love with her. For the first time for years I felt like a free man. I love your mother, you should not doubt it- he spoke hastily to Rhaenys and Aegon- but it doesn't change the fact that Lyanna Stark was a special woman, one of a kind. I will always remember her. I married her in secret a few months after the Harrenhal Tourney, and we escaped somewhere we could not be find.

The silence in the chamber was deafening. Rhaenys and Aegon were looking at their father like he was a stranger while Daenerys had mixed feelings- she knew how it is to fall for someone you were not suppose to, but she was also hurt because she realised that, because of the past, there would be many more difficulties for her (and Robb). More than she anticipated, that was.

Rhaegar continued his story:

-I thought that we will be happy, all of us. How wrong was I... From that moment on, everything changed for worse, but it wasn't directly my fault. I can only tell you what happened at second-hand because by then I was already with Lyanna. She was betrothed to Robert Baratheon and he was a very impulsive man; he didn't take kindly what I did but it is not the worst. When the Starks found out about everything that happened they were outraged- and Brandon Stark was the angriest of them all. He was the oldest son of Rickard Stark and his heir but he died. He died because he came here, to the Capitol with an outrageous demand. In a way I could understand him but my father was not that forgiving. I don't know how it happened but both Brandon and Rickard Stark were killed by my father.

It wasn't exactly true because Rhaegar knew how they died. However, he came to a conclusion that it could have been too much for the children. All three of them were in a deep shock and Daenerys seemed to be deeply hurt. In that moment, unwanted, a memory of Lyanna founding out about her father and brother popped into his mind.

Rhaegar slowly and loudly came towards Lyanna's chamber- he did it on purpouse so she could prepare herself if it was even possible. The Prince doubted it but they had no choice- they had to figure out the situation. For some time, they lived like a husband and wife and even though Lyanna grumbled a bit because she was forced to hide, they were still happy. Nothing lasted forever and their idyll ended when a raven from Starfall arrived. Daynes relayed a message from the Capitol and when Lyanna found out she went crazy- she kicked and screamed, she cried and cried; most importantly, she refused to meet with Rhaegar and he wasn't happy about it but he understood, or at least tried to understand. Almost a whole day passed and his wife was still ignoring him. The Prince thought that they couldn't drag it for so long so he came to Lyanna's room. She was lying on her bed and she stopped crying. When she saw him, she raised her voice:

-Leave me alone!

-Lyanna, my dear, I am so sorry for your loss- started Rhaegar but Lyanna interrupted him, shouting:

-Don't you dare to tell me you are sorry! IT'S YOUR FAULT! You tricked me and now my father and brother are dead!

Rhaegar tried to be symapthetic but her screams made him angry as well so he retorted coldly:

-You are just as responsible for this as I am. Yes, I wanted marry you but you agreed! You got what you wanted- you didn't have to marry Robert Baratheon.

Lyanna looked at him with painful expression and whispered:

-Yes, I wanted be free, to choose my own path. But not for this price.

-I am sorry, I really am- spoke Rhaegar softly and hugged her. She stiffened in his embrace but then she went limp- If I had known what my father was planning to do I would have done everything to stop it.

-I know- replied Lyanna- but it doesn't change the fact that I killed Bran. And my father.

Rhaegar tried to come up with good words to tell but he couldn't find them so he shut his mouth. He wanted to add one more piece of information but when he saw her state, he decided not to spill it. If she knew that her second brother, Eddard, raised banners to fight with the Crown... well she could try to escape. He couldn't allow that to happen so Rhaegar remained silent.

Lyanna broke the silence with words:

-It's too much for me to handle right now. I don't know if I will ever forgive you- and myself- for all of this. Maybe yes, maybe not- time will tell. For now, please leave me alone.

The Prince wanted to argue but he held his tongue when he saw determination on her face. He nodded and left Lyanna alone to stand and look at the view behind the open window.

Rhaegar didn't know that then, but it was a beginning of the end of their love. Lyanna tried really hard to forgive him and herself but her guilt was impossible to overcome and put behind. When she found out about the Ned Stark rebellion she wanted to go back to him but Rhaegar couldn't allow her to do it. She started to resent him. Then they learnt that she was pregnant. She accepted her fate and Rhaegar was hoping that the birth of their child would rekindle their love. However, in the end both Lyanna and their son were dead and reason for that was so mundane that Rhaegar couldn't belive it. In addition, his father soon passed so he had to go back to King's Landing to take the Throne. He made peace with his wife, Ellia. The beginning of his reign was horrible but he made it through that.

His thoughts were interrupted by a commotion in the solar room- Daenerys rose to her feet and fled the room, tears n her eyes, before anyone could stop her. Rhaenys and Aegon stayed to hear the end of their father's story.

- After Rickard and Brandon Stark's deaths, the war began. My father wasn't satisfied with their deaths, he wanted the heads of both Ned Stark and Robert Baratheon. Jon Arryn was taking care of them durng those times and he refused to let them go. He was the Warden of East and Lord Paramount of Vale so his voice mattered, and he raised the banners. It was the first move of the War of the Usurper. Do you have any questions?

Rhaenys was first to ask:

-How did mother forgive you? How could you do that to her? She was your wife!- she fumed but she relented under a hard stare of her father.

-How did mother forgive me? It's a good question- Rhaegar paused for a moment and then continued- At first, she stayed with me because of you. You were her children and if she had decided to leave, she would have to let you go. She was unwilling to do so, for your sake, she stayed. Then, with time our love came back. I was stupid, on the first sign of trouble, I escaped. That's why I did it- I gave up on her and for that I have no excuse- the King said it with such bitterness that he had some trouble composing himself- But your mother gave me another chance. A chance which I did not deserved but I took it and did my best. In a sense we needed a shock- and if those events hadn't led to the civil war I would be glad because, with time, we found each other again. Is this answer satisfactionary?

Rhaenys stared long and hard at him, then nodded. Aegon used that opportunity and asked:

-Father, how were you able to convince lord Stark to surrender? If I were in his situation I would never cease fighting- I would fight till the end- me or my opponent.

The King only smiled in response and said to his son:

-Answer to this question, my son, will forever remain a secret for everyone besides me and lord Stark- he looked outside the window and saw complete darkness- It's late, my children, so you have to rest- after all, I'm not the only one who has duties and places to attend tomorrow. Go to sleep and think about what I told to you. I hope you won't judge me too harshly.

Aegon and Rhaenys exchanged looks and they both nodded and left. Rhaegar noticed that his son took the news calmly, while Rhaenys was clearly distressed. She was upset but he understood her. The King only hoped that his children wouldn't resent him for his mistakes.

Rhaegar tought that it didn't go so bad. Yes, it was unpleasnt but he felt immense relief. No more hiding- and besides, they would found out about it sooner or later.

In one way it was far from over; Rhaegar knew that he had to talk to his sister. Daenerys was really upset and the King had a strong suspicion why. She would have to be calmed- if not by him, then by someone else, but it was not a job for today. It was a hard day and the King deserved a rest so he came back to his chambers and to Ellia.