AN: Hey guys! For whatever reason the website was fucking up, but I haven't made an actual update since around January. I was back in therapy for a while and I haven't been able to focus on this but I re read some of it and figured it was good enough to hold on to.

I also made a tumblr. Go follow it (link in bio)

Thanks for sticking with me while I clean myself up. ~S

Chapter 5

"Alex, what the hell is this?" Morello shifted in her seat to ease the pain of bench patterns imprinting the backs of her thighs. She tucked a strand of mousy hair behind her ear as Alex continued pacing the grimy tile beneath her.

"Yeah, this is kinda trippy, yo." Poussey efforted to deepen her hands inside the shallow pocket of her hoodie. The labored sounds of Pennsatucky chipping away at red drugstore nail polish served as a distraction from the unpleasant setting. Though a poor one, as the mildewy smell reeking from the cracks in the ceiling and floors was far too strong.

Alex groaned and stopped mid-pace.

"Guys, stop. I'll tell you what this is all about when Nicky gets here." She glanced at the rubber watch fastened on her wrist and groaned to see the time.

7:15

"Come on, can't we do this later?" Lorna whined.

"No, this can't wait." Alex said, a bit too aggressively than was necessary, continued pacing. "Come on, Nicky. Today." Impatience twisted tighter in her core.

"Alex, come on, just tell us what's happenin'." Taystee implored. Green eyes rolled into the back of the captain's skull in response.

"She's obviously not tellin' us till Catch shows up so jus' wait a sec." Poussey drew in a breath to preserve patience as well. Taystee smacked her ebony lips together, accompanied by a frustrated head shake.

"P, we in the boys' locker room! And if they catch us up in here? I ain't givin' them no hanky panky if they walk in 'n see us. Nuh uh!"

"Like they'd want 'hanky panky' from you," Cindy barked a sharp laugh and Taystee's hand was quick to ambush her thick shoulder. As conflict escalated between the three outfielders, Alex's patience continued to erode at an alarming pace. As she kept pacing, and as the dwindling amount of patience began to plummet, the recognition of her poor choice in congregation setting emphasized even further how damn awful the whole situation was. With every anxious pace, her sneaker would stick to the floor beneath her, accompanied with the violent, stomach curdling, squeak of rubber and tile. The dingy lighting and permanent haze from sweat that fogged the air made her head reel. And fact that they were in a room that hosted penis fights and (preferably unsaid) testosterone-related miscellanea really made her question the importance of Nicky's presence, or the whole damn meeting altogether.

She checked her watch once more to see if time had decided to comply with her circumstances.

7:22

She grunted at the hour.

"Alright, Nicky should be here soon-"

"Probly somethin' retarded anyhow," Tucky mumbled just out of earshot. Alex's eyes still darted in her direction and pierced clean into her pallid cheeks.

"Sorry, you wanna speak up a little?" Alex took a heated step toward her. Impatience once more began to contort in her ribs. Wringing out the last drops of tolerance with every twist and turn.

"Yeah, this is fuckin dumb." Tucky stood in efforts to meet Alex's towering stance.

"Dumb my ass. Are you the one holding this fucking team together? Have you had anything remotely important to say this whole damn season?"

"Don't matter. Nicky ain't comin'. This meeting is stupid. I got places to be. I'm leavin'." Tucky started elbowing past the pitcher before being forced back down into her seat with a sturdy push of her thin shoulders.

"The fuck you're not!" Alex was still over her and beginning to boil as the other girls in the locker room fell into the hands of chaos.

"Oh, you wanna go, Lurch?" Tucky stood again and gave Alex a hard push, barely causing the tall girl to stagger back at all. The frail shortstop put up a pair of bony dukes and bounced back and forth. Alex maintained her already threatening posture. "Oh, you're gonna regret touchin' me." She sneered. "In the south, we do it different than from what you're used to, City Slick." Alex scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"You're from fucking Pennsylvania." Tucky fumed from every pore in her small frame. And with a growl setting in her comparatively pathetic jaw, she brought a wad of fist to Alex's cheek.

The pitcher recoiled as her reddened cheek began to throb. She brought a hand to the angered place, inhaling a sharp breath through clenched teeth. She wiped a forming clot of blood and deepened her thin brow when she saw the crimson stain on the tips of her pale fingers.

"Come on, Lurch. Show me somethin'." Adrenaline flared all though Tucky's gaunt extremities at the sight of Alex's bleeding cheek. She blew a strand of dark hair that bounced in front of her sight of the tall girl as she continued to give her poor boxer impression. "You too scared or somethin'? Huh?" Alex, still mesmerized by the red on her fingertips, smirked. She glanced at the girl for a moment through her cage of dark lashes before wiping the red smudge on her pants.

Her full attention rested upon Tucky, still bouncing like a ridiculous jelly bean, still expectant for Alex's move. She bounced closer to the pitcher for a moment, in hopes of making her flinch. But Alex scoffed, offering the least amount of respect for the effort. That scoff, unbeknownst to the rest of them, was the very last of Alex's patience.

"If you want a rise out of me so bad," And as green eyes darkened in the already musty light, Tucky was propelling backward against the metal lockers by Alex's effortless hand. More uproar came over the girls as Big Boo and Lorna were prying an agitated, yet terrifyingly collected Alex from a flustered Tucky. And even though the shortstop was obviously rattled by the pitcher's facile attack, she was still yapping empty threats and Alex was still not giving a shit.

Big Boo dusted her hands and turned to a visibly ruffled Lorna.

"Welp, the swim team comes back in-" she checked the complex face of glass on her wrist. "Ten minutes. I'm sorry, I'm not starting my day with seeing a chlorine-wrinkled jimmy." She heaved her backpack over her broad shoulder. "I'm out."

"Yeah, imma dip outta here too." Poussey shuffled to gather her backpack and leave.

"Yeah, before Alex fuckin' breaks Tucky's jaw or some shit." Cindy was followed by the remaining few Lions as she filled out the archway, deserting a muddled, frustrated Alex.

"Wait, guys no. Come on." She called after them. Tucky saw this opportunity to scuttle away from Alex, distracted by the others leaving. "Seriously?" And after realizing they was no hope of any of them turning around, Alex kicked the side of a locker, big toe complaining not long after. She wiped more florid droplets from the wound on her cheek and after pacing about for a moment longer, decided to abandon her plans of impromptu congregations in high school boys' locker rooms for good.

She started to sling her black bag over her shoulder as more thoughts and concerns pin balled around in her head. And she was fully focused on them as one disappointed foot fell reluctantly in front of the other.

That is, until a pungent whiff of fresh chlorine passed beneath her nose and a mob of wet footsteps began pattering around the corner.

"Fuck."

/

"-And I had to sit in a fucking locker with god knows what was in there, for like thirty minutes."

"Eesh, Jesus." Nicky forced a pained face in attempts to sympathize as best she could with her friend's injured cheek and aching knees. Alex hopped down from her perch on the sink and landed on her feet. She joined the catcher in the spotty mirror, their amusing height difference displayed proudly in their reflection.

"Seriously, where the hell were you?" Nicky turned on her heels and dawdled away from the mirror. She took sudden interest in the paper towel dispenser and continued her idle walk.

'Ehhhh," she pulled a few from the plastic case, wadding brown towels up in her hands for no reason and tossing them in the garbage.

"Come on, Nichols. What could you have been doing that took all of that time." Nicky teetered to her left until she turned to face an expectant Alex. She sighed and flicked her eyes to the musty floor before responding.

"Hot blonde from the cheerleading squad." Alex's pale cheeks flared just as her eyes did for a moment. She released a deep-seated groan and Nicky began filling the air with drowned out apologies.

"Come on, really?" Alex bothered her temple as she allowed the lousy excuse to sink in. She inhaled again, using it to unravel the knots forming beneath her pointer finger. "Okay, which blonde was it, cheekbones or minnie mouse." Nicky hesitated before troubling the girl with the answer.

"Minnie." Alex groaned even more as she walked away from the answer. "Nicky, I would've been substantially less annoyed with you if it had been with someone with a voice that's fucking at least audible to the human ear. And also with an IQ a little above 40."

"Hey, don't knock it. You would've done her too if you had the chance." Nicky then gave her a knowing look from beneath clumpy eyelashes. "And besides, with a squeaker like that, at least you really know when you're doing a good job." Alex hummed a hoarse path of agreement between her lips. She ran her tongue across her line of pearled teeth to allow the thought to simmer. Nicky shook her wild head and took Alex's former seat next to the sink.

"Yeah, about that, how did you get the chance?" The tall girl's forming smile abandoned all attempts to maintain a task oriented composure to hear the story, just for now. Nicky laughed snarkily as she cracked her knuckles against her black denim thigh.

"Well, I thought we had agreed on going into the girl's locker room to tell them. So I went in there, right. And lo and behold, Sparkle Tits in all her glory." Alex laughed. "So she saw me and was all like 'Oh I'm sorry I should've taken a stall I didn't realize you were here.'" Nicky struggled to raise her voice to the octave. "So I said I didn't mind and brrroop!" she paved a straight path with her hand to go with the sound effect. "Smooth sailing from there." Alex tipped her head back and chuckled darkly.

"Well I mean, good for you, but you still flaked." Nicky's lips fell askew.. "So when are we gonna tell them."

"Practice. Right before practice." Alex raised the frames of her glasses to her forehead and sucked in a sip of air between her teeth.

"We can try." The wild haired girl nodded and noticed the beginnings of stressed lines disturbing the pitcher's forehead.

"Hey, kid. We're gonna be fine. Don't stress over this." Alex scoffed.

"You just came off of a fucking sex high. That's not fair."

"You want a sex high? What about Blondie, eh?" Alex threw her head back and let out a pungent bark of laughter. But when she returned her chin to level and discovered Nicky's anticipating eyes, she blinked an eye roll.

"Nah. She's too relevant." Nicky furrowed a perplexed brow.

"Relevant." Alex took a vacant spot on the other side of the sink and sat cross legged to face Nicky. "She's hot, kinda cute. Ugh, likeable even. Seems pretty relevant to me." She smirked as Alex swayed her head back and forth, agreeing with a slight tilt of head.

"No, relevant as in she's too important to the whole thing right now. She's my stand in and I have to coach her. If I was screwing around with her on the side and god forbid we don't see eye to eye on something, there goes my sex and our fifth year win."

Alex was right for the most part. For the large majority of those who knew Alex, they knew how much she loved sex. And for those who really knew Alex, they knew how much she loved and needed to win. Alex was the kind of person who thrived on the adrenaline triggered from victory. Her competitive core was a heated beast, untamed and with a constant need to be fed. Alex, tough, determined, and executive, was addicted to everything gained from winning. Cheers, pats on the back, hard work paying off and sweat, blood, and tears all finally meaning something. But for those who really knew Alex, they knew that she had a crippling fear of loss. Not the kind of that stemmed from defeat (although Alex hated that), but just loss. Alex, beneath a cold and lovely exterior, was choleric. Passionate. In everything. Sex, winning, relationships. Alex wasn't like Nicky. One fuck and nothing more. Alex envied that of her friend. She would see faces of moans in the janitor's closet pass by her as she went about her day. And as much as she would push everything beneath her surface, she'd never entirely forget. And because of her (former) blinding hatred for the blonde and because she simply was just that hot, Alex knew the sex would be great. And Alex knew she would never be able to forget it. She knew she'd become addicted to it. And though she'd never admit it to herself, she knew she'd go in too deep. And eventually, Alex knew Piper would just turn into another lost girl she had to push beneath the surface. Alex didn't want that. For reasons yet unknown.

Alex, tough, determined, and executive was scared of losing Piper. If ever they had the chance.

"I mean, maybe when all this is over." Alex hopped down as the muffled bell rang through the thick bathroom door.

"Huh." Nicky landed on her feet as they plopped onto the tile. "I mean if you won't take her, I certainly will." Alex whipped around to face the cheeky girl.

"Shut up."

/

Everyone was standing when Piper entered room 117A. Chatter amongst her fellow classmates caused a powerful buzz of jumbled words to press against her temples and rattle in her ears. She turned to a scrawny looking boy to her left.

"What's happening?" She tucked a muddled strand of hair behind her ear in wait.

"Seating arrangements. Pay attention." The response rushed from his thin lips as he hastily returned his attention to what the teacher was saying.

"Err, Chapman." Mrs. Bell gave a seat in the back of the room a strong couple of pats. The blonde adjusted the strap of her backpack on her shoulder and roamed over to the lonely seat, navigating through clumps of students attempting to do the same. She allowed her bag to drop like dead weight on the floor next to the dreary seat she surrendered to. Her aching shoulder thanked her for releasing the burden. And because Bell was only on the letter D and she had a while to go, Piper allowed herself to doze into the crook of her elbow. Noises became nothing but a blurry hum, and heavy lashes fluttered down to a close...

Nudge.

Nudge.

Shove.

Piper jolted awake and took her change in surroundings. Chatter levels had hushed into a mild whisper and bumbling bodies had already settled into seats. From the nerves in her left shoulder still vibrating beneath her skin, she drowsily began to shift her gaze and position to that side. Hazy eyes glazed over Bell writing foreign words on the board and a few students on their phones. Until she addressed the shove.

"Oh," Another spike of energy surged through her when she saw Alex's smug expression. Her placid, mossy eyes pierced her, even behind the lenses of thick frames and a deep laugh echoed from her smile at Piper's still torpid state.

"Hey, sleepyhead." Piper wiped the grit from the corners of her eyes, too quickly, because Alex laughed again.

"No need to preen, you look fine." Piper began brushing out her tender blonde locks through her fingers and tried not to wince too much at the pain. "I like tired Piper. She's cute." Alex adjusted the frames on the bridge of her nose. The blonde stopped her brushing to revert her gaze to Alex.

"Ha, thanks." Her fingers continued their harsh motion through her hair and Piper's nose scrunched once more at a knot she came upon. Alex chuckled.

"No, really. She is, you don't believe me?" Piper stopped mid stroke and her hunched posture straightened in faux assumption.

"Really?" Though the word came out dry her rosy lips struggled to keep down a smile.

"Really really." Alex rested the play for a moment. Just before reviving it. "The mascara under your eyes, droopy eyelids, adorable." Piper's cheeks began to blossom in pink and her hand rushed to clean the alleged makeup from beneath her eyes. Alex's raspy laughter blushed Piper's bones.

"I don't ha- Wha-?!"

"Ladies do I need to rearrange you?" Bell's disapproving, yet perpetually aloof voice barked. Piper made herself small while Alex did just the opposite.

"No, we're okay. Just allowing the lesson to uh. Percolate." Alex again adjusted her glasses, this time to feign a glimmer of genius, raising her thin brows for an extra touch of brilliance. Bell continued on with whatever rambling she was distracted from as Alex turned to Piper, doing her best to reattain diligence. She was etching away in a notebook, handwriting neat enough to be a font and notes organized as anything.

Alex smirked.

"Though you do snore up quite the little storm, you know that?" Piper had to eclipse her forming smile again with a blue eye roll. Still focused on her notes.

"Ha ha, funny, I don't snore." Her pencil continued to scratch against the paper and she was still earnestly focusing on what was being written on the whiteboard, though Alex's faint snickering caused Piper's stomach to stir.

"You do too, I was listening. You should get a breathing strip or something." Piper crooked her brow.

"You were listening to me sleep?" The blonde asked, incredulity woven in her voice. Alex stopped for a moment as her smirk fell into her lap.

"Oh, no. No I- I was just-"

"Ha. My turn to make you stutter." Alex cocked an intrigued brow as Piper's sly lips simmered into a satisfied smile.

"Not bad, Chapman." Alex settled into the back of her seat and Piper turned to her. Her once sly smile flourishing into a radiant one, deep blue eyes glistening like lucid, endless ocean. It wasn't cocky or lined with banter, it was genuine. Pure. And so fucking gorgeous.

Alex couldn't help but smile back.

"Yeah?" Piper let the tip of her tongue peek out from her teeth. Alex threw her hands up in defense, nothing to retaliate with.

"Didn't know you were full of surprises."

"Didn't know you were so fascinated."

Alex felt her chest swell when she chuckled, again unable to respond to the blonde's quick response. And as Alex was shaking her head and allowing this innocent mystery bask in her sunshiney glory, she was realizing how fucked she was. As boring as this class was, time was painless as long as she was with this one. She was supposed to hate Piper. Right from the get go, she was supposed to hate her. But the more Piper was unraveling right in the palms of her hands, the harder it was becoming for her to do so. On top of this girl looking like the fair maiden from a renaissance painting, Alex discovered how fucking fun it was to banter with her. How for the first time in her life, she was speechless. Unable to quip back with something better or corner someone in a game of conversational wit. Piper had out-bantered and completely flustered the queen of both banter and collectivity in a single bound, clueless to the feat she had conquered. She had backed Alex into a corner that forced her to question everything, completely unawares and looking damn irresistible while doing it.

And Alex thought she was clever.

She allowed her eyes to stay on the blonde for a few moments longer before her gaze fell into her lap.

"Too relevant. All in good terms. Just to keep it genuine."

She reminded herself to leave things the way they were. Too relevant. Too much at stake.

She sank her front teeth into her bottom lip.

"So uh, any other surprises you wanna share with me?"

When Piper's cheeks flushed an addle shade, Alex's effortless smirk returned.

/

Nicky heaved the last of the bags with the catcher's gear on the bench beneath her cubby with a grunt. She dusted her calloused hands on her pants and took a seat on the top next to Alex, watching the girls pull into the empty parking lot.

"You ready for this?" The catcher looked to her tall friend, who was lazily spitting sunflower seeds from the corner of her lip. The pitcher turned to her, inhaled through her nose and chuckled.

"No," she fished in the bag for another good seed and popped it in her mouth. She turned away for a moment and spat out the shell out. "It just brings back so much, you know? That whole game. Everything with that woman, that whole team, just." Nicky hummed and took a fingerfull of seeds for herself.

"Yeah. It's a lot." She crunched. "But c'est la vie or some shit." her americanized french made Alex laugh for a second, before her face returned to a tinge of blue once more as she sighed. Nicky clicked her tongue behind her teeth.

"Hey," Alex met her friend's determined almond eyes. "Better now than later. And also," She blinked away her own apprehension before continuing. "We got each other in here. They can't get mad at you. We got us. Now's the time to you know, get shit done. Before all hell breaks loose." Alex nodded. Then a smirk was quick to find her wired lips.

"I see you've not changed in the comforting department." Nicky scrunched her freckled nose and shoved a laughing Alex.

"Fuck you, Vause." Nicky's frown was ripping at the seams as she continued to swat at her friend.

"No, no. it's cool. You did pretty good." Alex affectionately pushed the catcher's forehead. From a distance, they heard a sharp whistle, Red's whistle. The two players made eye contact with the sound, chests beginning to bear the weight of what they had to do.

Red's fierce pupils sent lasers to the girls, a small nod of fiery head reminding them of their task.

Nicky nudged Alex's shoulder and motioned to the girls beginning to pile in with their things.

"Ready or not, here we go."

/

"Hey, uh guys." Alex began, apprehension tacking onto pathetic start to Impromptu Congregation Part II. She cleared her throat and continued. "Um. We have something important to talk about. Nicky has uh, been so kind to join us, finally." She smirked nervously as Nicky made her presence known. Her pale fingers fiddled with the rims of her glasses for a moment. "So the important thing is that there's someone, well, familiar. Making a comeback this season." Alex looked up from her tattered black Chucks to see the team before her, sat upon buckets and on benches, all with perplexity oppressing their faces.

"Vause are you feelin' okay?" Lorna piped with an uneasy smile.

"Yeah uh, you don't look so good. Like you gon' puke up on the floor." Taystee's brows were bent in on each other, visibly uncomfortable at the thought of likely possibility of Alex vomiting.

"Herbal teas are fantastic for indigestion," Crazy Eyes added, only to receive disapproving looks from Cindy and Taystee. Alex struggled with a sour taste in her mouth.

"Guys, I'm fine. Just please, pay attention." She gulped in a breath of air and took a moment to swallow it down. She grappled with the nape of her neck, planning how to phrase the following sentences.

Until she did vomit, all the words she wasn't supposed to say so blatantly.

"Vee's back this season and the county has forgiven her for all the money she took for team booster funds." Alex allowed her head to surrender to gravity. The dugout shrilled in reactions. Frustration, anger, contempt, all in one response.

"But she was suspended! After all the shit she did?!" She could hear Tucky's twang stick out through the voices.

"Yeah, the county just bought it?" Big boo stomped a frustrated foot against the dirty floor.

"This thing is rigged, man. This is bullshit!" Poussey smacked her glove against her thigh and ran a panicked palm over her wooly head. Everyone was going off all at once. All ranting, all raving. Alex couldn't catch their attention if she tried. Nicky attempted to calm the riot of lions as well, but to no avail. She turned to the pitcher, already a bundle of nerves and already swarmed with her own response to the whole ordeal. Alex was unable to respond. She just stood before her team, making out whatever words she could in the tumult of reactions.

Nicky finally managed to take things to a physical extent. She took the knob of her and banged it against a nearby bucket. The sound meshed with the voices for a while, but eventually they settled and silence came upon them.

Alex glazed over the sight of everyone's faces again, this time all troubled with the same distress she felt when the news was dropped on her. But she sighed for the thousandth time that day, remembering her responsibility. Remembering to fulfill Red's trust in her.

"I know this is a lot. For everyone." She addressed everyone's gaze. The weight of everything pressing further into the pitcher's hands. "And yeah, this thing is rigged. This is bullshit." She stuffed her hands in her pockets in attempts to warm her freezing extremities. "But in the end, it's our bullshit. The bullshit we've gone through together for the past four years now. Even longer, for those of you who've played middle school and rec ball together." She smirked for a moment to reminisce on her younger days with Nicky, as did the three outfielders, who nudged each other and shared a few smiles. "Vee is fierce. And scary good. But you know. Shit, so are we right?" She scoffed and mustered a weary smile through flattened lips. She looked to Nicky on her left, now sat open legged on a bucket. The catcher gave Alex a subtle nod, for encouragement, to keep going with the awful, cheesy motivation.

It was working, at least. Alex continued, more determined.

"She's gonna try and pull some fucked up shit like she did last season. Worse, even. So now, time is money. Practice is money. Use every resource you can to prepare for whatever fucked up things she might have in store for us. We know how sick she is." Boo grunted in agreement, kicking up a plume of orange dust with the toe of her cleat.

"But guys, for fucks sake, we just need to work together. Relentlessly. Push all the bullshit we have with each other aside," She glanced at Pennsatucky for a second before continuing, who acknowledged her as well. "So we can work through the bullshit that's in front of us now." The team remembered Piper. Unpresent for this meeting, but as Alex addressed this point, it was like the blonde was at the center of the dugout. "I know this 'ecosystem', or whatever the fuck you wanna call it, is what holds us together, but we have to be together for this because this season is going to be nasty and awful and grueling if we don't. I know I don't want to do that," Alex swallowed the lie about having to tolerate Piper and pressed on with the point. "But we have to if we're gonna win." More silence poisoned the air around them. Turmoil was dead. It was just hard pressed news on the foreheads of the girls. Everyone of them swimming with confusion with nothing to do about it than to prepare for the worst.

Alex shifted her weight and once again, acknowledging the gloom before her. "Okay I don't know what else to say so just go practice. I guess." She adjusted her glasses again, unnecessarily so. "That's all, folks." She chuckled weakly at the awful conclusion.

And just as things started to return to a remotely normal pace, Piper trotted in.

"Hey guys. What'd I miss?" She asked, innocently, out of breath, noticing the sluggishness of what should've been a normal dugout settle-in. The sea of faces turned to her and fell before her cleated feet, all bleak and heavy. She felt her own chest drop when they did nothing but head for the green. And yet no one had the energy for snide remarks or nasty side eyes. They all passed by her, dejected, tired without exertion. Leaving Piper clueless in the doorway, unable to comprehend their behavior.

She looked to Alex, eyes searching for some answer. Any answer. But Alex had none, she was just as drained as the rest of them.

"Nothing. You're fine." She turned on her heels and made her way to the bleachers to nest. Just as Piper went to the field to work. Both unfocused. Both confused.

/

Piper sent the the ball whizzing into Nicky's glove, beautifully so. With an graceful spin that made yellow and red blend like hypnotic art. And Nicky lobbed the yellow ball back to her, with no effort at all.

The whole time Alex hadn't spoken a word to Piper, except to remind her to "release through the pinky" and to "not finish so closed." Aside, no banter, no smartass comments had escaped her lips since she saw Piper in sitting next to her in class. The blonde tried to make eye contact with her from the field. She tried to send beams of please look at me I'm trying to impress you to Alex, perched up on her usual spot in the top of the bleachers. With her dark head resting on her knees or following the spots of crows that textured the vivid sky. Silent Alex wasn't normal. Silent Alex was borderline worrying.

Piper sent another rise ball to Nicky with a hollow smack of leather, looking to Alex for at least a grimace of approval. But the girl was too fascinated with the tattered cloth of her Converse to look up. Piper huffed a warm breath of air and allowed her glove hand to drop to her side.

"Hey, Nicky my shoulders kinda tired. Uh, is it cool if I take a break for a second?" Nicky's face was screened from the black mask on her face. Any and all expressions were obscured behind the metal. But perplexity was still evident in the pebbles of her voice and shrugged shoulders.

"Uh, yeah. Sure." Alex brought forested eyes up to the catcher, who was making her way to a bottle of water leaned up against a fence.

"Yeah, Nic, if you're hot take a break too. Do whatever" Alex called after her. The catcher responded with a distant thumbs up. Alex turned to Piper. Concern vexed the blonde's fair cheeks as did that same concern flood the oceans in her eyes. The expression made Alex's brow twitch. She ignored what looked like sympathy on Piper's, in attempts to keep the lesson in motion.

"How's your shoulder feel?" Alex was trying so hard to ignore the entrancing shade of blue that was drowning in worry.

"I already said it was tired." She responded. The pitcher tilted her head for a moment, attempting to recall the blonde's words.

"Oh." Her green eyes returned the grass beneath her shoes. Piper nudged her broad shoulder with the gentle point of her finger.

"Hey, are you okay?" The beginnings of a frown tugged at Alex's lips.

"Yeah, I'm fine." She released her eyebrows into a light pair of arches, though the dim light in her pupils betrayed them.

"Alex, don't lie come on." Piper offered another, more insistent stamp on the taller girl's shoulder, one that Alex brushed off like dust. She raised her glasses to her forehead to accompany a laden sigh.

"Piper, just leave it. It's nothing-"

"Woah, what happened to your cheek?" The raw mark of crimson on Alex's cheek glowed in the light of the marmalade sky. Poorly applied concealer faded around its edges, visible attempts to hide it behind the thick rims of her glasses. Fresh blood still glistened against the sinking sun. The aching shades of violet beneath it matched the lilac wine in the clouds.

Piper's finger reached to graze the bruised wound, but Alex swept it away, another dismissive sigh rising in her throat.

"I said it's nothing. It's-"

"Fine? Yeah, Alex that doesn't look fine. I have stuff in my bag."

"Piper, I respect the fact that you're trying, I can see that. But don't be dramatic." Piper's heart hiccupped in embarrassment. Alex scoffed, bitterly enough to sour the blood rushing to the blonde's fair, untainted cheeks. "You don't have to full on fucking nose dive into my shit. We're not fucking friends. I'm just teaching you, and you're just learning. Nothing else. God." Piper could've snapped back. Easily. Her tongue was sharp enough, her skin thick enough. But these words coming from Alex were serrated, dipped in poison that made Piper speechless. And they damn borderline hurt. She receded.

"Okay," She tightened her blonde ponytail and cast her eyes to the side. "Sorry I asked." She wandered a few steps away, pulling her arm across her slight frame to stretch her unknotted shoulder. Alex watched as she stretched the other arm, guilt tossing in her ribs.

Way to be harsh, Alex. The bite of her words left a sour sting on the tip of her tongue, but more sour was the confusion about why she even regretted it.

"Wait, Piper." The blonde's chin peered over her shoulder. Alex raked a hand through tangles of raven hair. "Uh. It's starting to throb." She winced at the sub-par excuse. "Again." She felt an eyeroll coming on, but one directed upon herself.

Ugh.

"Mind, cleaning it up?" She shifted her weight to her heels, a pathetic grimace surfacing on her cheeks.

Piper turned to face her completely. She mosied on over to her, taunting in her step. But her expression was clean of mischief. It was kind, chaste in a way.

She motioned her head toward the dugout, to her infamous duffle bag.

"Not at all."

/

"So what happened?" Piper squirted a pink dollop of scented hand sanitizer into the center of her palm, the gentle aroma of sweet pea wisped under Alex's nose as Piper rubbed it in. The pitcher was sat cross legged on the bench of chipping green paint, glasses still perched at the crown of her head and cheek still scabbed and open.

Piper rummaged through her bag until she fished out a floral printed pouch. The crisp sound unzipping shrilled beneath her dainty fingers.

"I just got in a fight. It was dumb." Alex blew a strand of hair that threatened to fall to her nose. Piper located a small pad of gauze and splashed it with her water.

"Oh." She cleaned around the area of scab and Alex winced when she pressed to hard on the tender bruise. She then pulled out a small can of saline spray, popping the plastic cap off and shaking vigorously as instructed. Alex's brow creased.

"How much stuff do you have in there?" Piper bent down to meet her mossy eye. She gave a quick, cool spritz of wash and Alex flinched at the icy sting.

"Lots." Piper resealed the cap and dropped it back in the bag. She went back and raked through the contents of the pouch again. The ointment she was supposed to apply next came into account.

She looked to Alex, awaiting whatever sort of treatment would sting or soothe her wound next. Her eyes glanced back at the tube of Neosporin, the final step in the curative procedure and the abrupt exterminator of any further conversation before they continued back on the green.

The setting was too close to perfect. Alex, mesmerizing and undeniably dominant being cared for by the nurturing hand of Piper. The two alone under the colors of dusk, nothing but the overhead lights to keep their space alight. All of it to be terminated by the damned tube of ointment.

The conversation still could flourish, undistracted and uninterrupted. Piper chewed her lip in a brief moment of consideration.

But only if she kept the healing process in motion.

Piper forgot the ointment and looked to the facial sunscreen.

She dabbed a white droplet on her finger and walked over to Alex's cheek.

"Tucky." Alex continued, shying away from Piper's touch when she rubbed the cream around the bruise. "We just had some stupid fight and she popped me in the cheek. Her fist is just a wad of bone, nothing but a scratch it's fine."

"Hmm." Piper wiped the remaining sunscreen from her finger onto the black of her pants and returned to her bag.

What to use, what to use.

Her eyes fell upon a stick of mint chapstick.

Good enough.

She rubbed a wintry swatch on her finger.

"Hey uh. That wasn't cool of me. Just now." Alex blurted, suddenly. The statement made Piper stop midpace to consider the rough beginnings of an apology. An apology from Alex Vause. The girl whose wound she was over-tending to and the girl who she was most terrified of in the world.

Piper finished the two step journey to the girl's cheek.

"I'm sorry for what I said back there. I've just had a rough day." Alex's lashes flitted up to meet Piper's focused gaze. Her fingers stopped their rubbing motion and those vast sapphire eyes began to drown the jade in Alex's.

She smirked.

"No shit. I mean you got punched in the face." The blonde felt Alex's low chuckle ricochet against the small of her back on the walk to her remedies and time slowers.

"Hey, Alex?" She dipped her finger into a bottle of eyedrops.

"Hm."

"What was going on, when I walked in before practice. It seemed heavy." Alex sighed beneath the tip of Piper's wet finger.

"Heavy doesn't even begin." The blonde caught Alex's eye before it could fall to the floor. Lead pupils and dull irises still failed to hush Piper's curiosity.

"Not to be invasive, but what exactly-"

"I can't tell you." Alex cut through the question like a slick knife. No harshness seemed to carry through her words, but they held a weight of stern conviction, which receded into a doleful apology. "I'm sorry just not now, I'm still trying to process it myself."

"No I get it, it's fine." Piper wiped her cold finger on her pants and went back to her quiet search. And when she discovered no other antidote could carry the time, she finally unscrewed the top of the ointment.

She squirted a white tap of the calming cream onto the tip of her finger, looking to Alex in apprehension for a moment before dabbing it on the wound.

"And hey,"

"Hm." Alex hummed again. Piper swallowed an anxious taste that plagued her tongue. And even though her finger remained in motion, her words seemed to stop in her throat before escaping from her lips.

"Are we friends?" The blonde's innocent question held an unexpected weight in Alex's hands. She allowed it to sink into the tips of her fingers, even though it troubled her. She was supposed to hate Piper. She wasn't supposed to get close to Piper. She was too delicate.

She was too relevant.

But the longer the question remained in the palms of her hands, the easier it was to carry. The harder it was to deny an honest answer.

The corner of the Alex's lip tugged downward.

"I don't like to label things." Alex's clever pupils absorbed Piper's expanse of iris. The color started to drain from endless blue into the color of sheer disappointment.

It was a color Alex never wanted to see in Piper's eyes. But god, Alex was still just as lost.

But a moment later, her lips lurched back into a keen smirk. And from there, they released into that signature Vause laugh, the one that could slice through stained glass and snatch Piper's heart in a single bound.

"I'm just fucking with you. Yeah. Sure." The bright pigment in Piper's eyes revived as they rolled back with the air of a sigh. She couldn't help shake her head and chuckle silently at the cruel joke.

"Fuck you."

"Don't threaten me with a good time." Alex's laugh aroused again in her throat. Piper returned to the floral pouch and uncovered a small bandage, ripping it from the wax paper packing on her way back to the fully dressed wound.

Alex watched Piper fiddle with the adhesive sides of the compress and couldn't help but laugh at the way she'd hiss curses under her frustrated breath.

It was too adorable to deny.

Her devious eyes narrowed into fine slits, lips still shaped in their smirk. "Can I at least get a kiss first?"

Piper spread the bandaid taut across her patient's cheek with a smile forming upon her rosy lips. She tried to maintain a platonic composure, although her her cheeks were heating beneath her fair skin and it was painfully obvious that the other girl had Piper trapped. And because it was so impossible to keep up a friendly facade around someone like Alex Vause, there was nothing to do but comply.

She took a spot of the sliver of bench Alex's crossed legs left. And even though she could feel wood splintering her skin through her pants, the fact that her burning face was so fucking close Alex's was distraction enough.

Alex couldn't believe what she was doing. Alex was joking. Piper was crazy. She wasn't supposed to do that. Both of them knew well enough that she wasn't supposed to do that. Alex wanted to turn her cheek, tell her no, and sprint past the field, catch the soonest bus and make it for the hills. But god, it was too hard to coax her heart back down into her chest, stop her stomach from floundering inside, and to stop her own cheeks from rising in color.

Why was she getting nervous?

Alex was near frozen. The only thing she could move were her eyes to watch Piper graze her lip against her's, and to let them flutter to a close.

Piper wasn't supposed to be doing that. And yet there she was, allowing, and hell, even thirsting for it.

The blonde's opened her eyes, kissed the tips of her fingers, and pressed them to the band aid on Alex's anxious cheek.

"Okay, you're all set." Alex's eyes darted open, to see a smiling Piper, looking too proud of her clever little trick. Her jaw fell open. Alex Vause, for the third time that day, had been played.

"Aw, come on!" A laugh shrilled from Piper's contented chest and Alex shook her head, helpless and yet laughing along with her.

"Doctors don't mess with their patients." Piper's lips folded in on each other, still perched in a clever grin. Alex's eyes fell on Piper's lips for another moment, almost bemoaning the fact they didn't touch her's.

"Fair enough." Alex shrugged and held out a sardonic hand. "Thank you, Dr. Chapman."

"My pleasure." Piper shook it.

It took a moment for them to break the gaze they refused to let go of.

Nicky's fuzzy head peered out from around the gate. "Hey, lesbo love bunnies. We got ten minutes 'till security shows up." Alex shifted her gaze to Piper for another second before arising. She clasped her hands above her head and careened back to stretch. The blonde remained on the sliver of her seat for a second, just watching Alex bend the knots out of her spine and allowing the girl's soft groans rattle in her bones.

The tall girl turned over her shoulder and motioned with her head to walk in front of her. Piper scrambled to her feet to make it to the green, but mostly to catch a walk by herself. To fathom the fact that she almost kissed Alex Motherfucking Vause.

She traveled alone to where Nicky was sat on her bucket, mind still tumbling in her skull, lips trembling gently where they swept across Alex's. She bit the inside of it to stop its soft quivering.

But she couldn't help but laugh at the smart little trick she played. It outwitted Alex, which was an achievement already. And she did feel satisfied, hell even proud. But her silent laughter came from a place of panic. What would've happened if they kissed back there? Piper's chest warmed at the thought of Alex's fingers tugging at her disheveled ponytail. Skilled hand reaching for the button of her pants...

So much for being just friends.

Piper drove the thoughts from her wild imagination. And just as she thought all traces of Alex were gone, she heard feet prancing against lush grass behind her.

Alex nudged her shoulder, smirking and panting.

"And uh, hey Doc,- Since when do you need sunscreen to dress a wound?"

Shit.

AN: I was supposed to post this chapter this weekend after not touching this for so long, but I went on an impromptu road trip to North Carolina with some friends instead, oops. Seriously, we were supposed to go to the mall but plans changed (evidently.) But it was so amazing we got there at like three in the fucking morning and stargazed and drove through the mountains and ran around in nature and yelled at the sky when it rained. And then when the sun came up we jumped in this lake and froze our asses off and just fucked around and didn't give a shit and it was the best.

Anyway, thanks again for reading. You guys are really the best. ~S