Okay... guess I'm back.

Thanks for all those who reviewed :)

Just one note for a guest reviewer: both Shizuo and Izaya have their struggles in this fanfiction. It's not about Izaya alone, even if I focused just a little bit on him.

As his right hand bangs the floor, his left travels to his throbbing chest to clutch it in a firm fist. Upon leaning forward to massage that suffocating pain he casts a glance at his bleeding hand and he freezes. Mocha eyes narrow in shock, fear and disgust.

Monster. He thinks immediately.

With haunted eyes and shaking hands he discards the shreds of marble stuck in his knuckles, watching distantly as blood dripped in a steady flow.

"That doesn't even hurt." Shizuo solemnly states. He lets his limps go slack on the floor not caring for the blood streaming down, he knew it would stop eventually. He learnt that the hard way, nothing could kill him.

"Heiwajima Shizuo," He says aloud, a ghost of a bitter smile drawing on his face. "When did you sink this low?" He finishes with mixed tone of self-loath and blame, laying down on his back and crossing his arms behind his head, watching the thin streaks of cloud trailing across the azure sky. He raises the uninjured hand in front of his face, clenching and unclenching as if to sense the overflowing power of its punch.

"Why do I have no control over myself?" He asks no one in particular, for he has no one to ask, nor to trust.

"Do I have to be feared this way? Am I bound to feel alone for the rest of my life?" He allows his voice to break and his words to sound uncharacteristically small. After a long, beaten, exhausted sigh, he closes his eyes, relishing the warmth of the sun and giving a way to the sounds of birds to lull him. He had such a soft heart, and he really hated violence.

As Shizuo falls asleep, he doesn't feel the door of the rooftop open nor did he see a person leaving him and entering the school building.

Later, much to everyone's surprise, even to his own, Izaya attended his last class this afternoon, and now he and Shinra are leaving school together.

"Izaya-kun, the biology club has been in chaos since you disappeared, you should do something!" Shinra childishly whines, walking backwards few steps ahead of the raven.

Izaya sighs. "I've never been responsible for it, silly."

"But who can protect it better than you, Izaya-kun!" Shinra's hands flails.

"You can do it yourself." Izaya calmly flips over a page of the Manga he reads.

"But you're the vice president!"

"And you're the president."

"I know... I know." Shinra scratches the back of his head as he slowed down, thinking of a way to bring Izaya to take care of the club. Then another thought popped up in his mind.

"By the way, Izaya-kun." Shinra says pensively, letting Izaya advance a few steps in front of him.

"What is it?" The raven responds, obviously uninterested in whatever Shinra was going to say.

"Did you get over those recurring thoughts?"

For a second, Izaya stops dead in his tracks and he stiffens, the fingers turning the page over freeze midair and he sucks in a breath.

The reason Shinra dared to ask that question is clear to them both. Shinra knows.

It was three days before Izaya's absence that the bespectacled boy began to notice a change in his friend's behavior: unusually sleepy at class, coming late, not bringing lunch and spending his free time laying in the background sleeping, rather than doing his favorite activity, observing. Above that all, Izaya's pale and jumpy demeanor made Shinra's worry rise all the more.

The next day, when everyone was in the gym, Shinra went to the men's bathroom to check on his friend who took a long time there. Before unlocking the bathroom's door, Shinra stopped in his tracks when he heard a gagging sound, one that seemed painful and disgusting yet its owner didn't seem to care, probably too overwhelmed by his own misery. Hastily, after realizing that whoever was inside could actually be Izaya, Shinra pushed the door knob open and couldn't help the gasp that emerged from his lips upon the sight that faced him. It was indeed Izaya, bending over the sink, staring at him with a terrified, lost expression, holding a pocket knife with a trembling hand and demeaningly drooling. His dark hair strands dripped along with his drenched face and his eyes widened as he gazed at Shinra, unblinking, like a doe caught in headlights. Shinra's voice got stuck in his throat, but he still found the energy to inwardly thank God for making him the one who found Izaya this way. He was sure Izaya would be mortified if somebody ever saw him in a way beside his elegant, confident self. Finding his voice again, Shinra tried to make his friend see reason, even if he was still terrified himself.

"I-Izaya-kun..." Shinra began shakily. "Drop the knife...please." He breathed, trying to stay composed to coax his friend into doing the right thing.

Much to Shinra's surprise, the pocket knife fell down easily on the bathroom sink with a clatter, and Shinra went to collect it and hide it in his pocket immediately.

"Are you okay, Izaya-kun?" Shinra said as he wrapped one arm around Izaya's waist and helped him walk, making sure the raven doesn't fall or make a mess of himself.

"I...I want to go home." Izaya muttered, looking down and making of his hair a curtain to hide the bewildered emotions clearly displayed on his face. He swept his free arm over his mouth and chin, wiping the exceeding, ticklish droplets of water off his face.

Shinra cast a glance at the raven haired teen, biting his lower lip to prevent himself from prying or making a remark of how heart-breaking Izaya looked. In usual circumstances the two boys would be extremely, annoyingly honest with each other, but Shinra knew better. The last thing his friend needed now was being told he was pathetic.

"I think we should explain that to the teacher before he could allow you to leave." Shinra said thoughtfully.

The reaction he got from Izaya made him instantly regret his words. Izaya brutally clutched Shinra's collar and glared at him fiercely, eyes blazing.

"Don't you dare." He hissed between his teeth before he unlatched his grip and tried to steady his wobbly legs, clenching the sink for support. Shinra assisted him at once, keeping their position from earlier and walking to the teacher, only planning to ask for a leave without explanation. Being the friend of Shinra's dad, the teacher accorded them that without much ruckus nor unbidden lectures.

I hope you enjoyed it, let me know if you did. Constructive Criticism is always welcome.

Btw, the next three chapters are ready. ^^"