It has already been one whole year, 12 months, since baby Caelan Bodhi Tilsley was born into the arms of the angels. One year ago Carla was certain she would never recover from the loss... There was no way she would ever feel whole again, no way she would ever smile or laugh again. Today, she is missing her son more than ever but she also knows that she is stronger than she ever has been... Life is not the way she thought it would be. Life is not the way she wanted it to be. But this is the life she was supposed to have.

'Can you believe it has already been one whole year?' Carla asks as she sits down on the edge of the bed beside Nick.

'Seems to have flown by! What do you want to do today?' He asks as she snuggles into his side.

'Can we go see him? Maybe let a balloon go or something?' She asks and he nods his head.

'Of course. Why don't I go get Arlo dressed?' He suggests kissing the top of her head.

'That would be amazing.' She replies smiling slightly.

'Do you have your phone with you?' Nick asks as he glances down at his phone.

'No... Why?' Carla says glancing at her husband.

'Chelle texted me, apparently she's been trying to phone you.' He replies.

'I didn't want to deal with anyone today, Nick. I didn't want to deal with the sympathetic texts. I just want it to be our little family.' She explains and he nods his head.

'I get that. I'll tell her you'll phone her later.' He says as they reach the grave. Carla is holding Arlo's hand and clutching a large pale blue '1' balloon in her free hand.

'Hi, baby boy.' She whispers kneeling down next to the grave.

'Happy birthday, buddy...' Nick says smiling slightly as he bends down next to his wife.

'It's hard to believe that a year ago today we held you in our arms for the very first and last time.' Carla says glancing over at Nick.

'We brought someone to meet you.' He says glancing down at the carseat by his feet.

'Who's this, Arlo?' Carla asks gesturing to the tiny blue bundle.

'Teddy.' The toddler replies.

'That's right... Caelan, this is your baby brother Teddy Caelan Tilsley.' Nick says watching as Carla runs her hand over the gravestone.

'We love you so much, Caelan.' She whispers as tears fill her eyes.

'Happy birthday, angel.' She adds letting go of the balloon and letting it float up to the sky.

'Mummy.' Arlo says instantly throwing himself into his mother's arms.

'Mummy's okay, baby.' She replies kissing the top of his head.

'Hey, love... How are you doing?' Michelle asks as the Tilsley family make their way into the pub.

'Mm... We've just been to see Caelan.' Nick replies as Carla stares down at the floor.

'Do you want to go through the back? Have somewhere a little more private?' Michelle asks.

'No, I'm okay. I'll be okay. Can I have an orange juice, Chelle?' Carla asks smiling over at her best friend.

'Of course you can. Go sit down, I'll bring the drinks over.' Michelle replies.

'I'll have the same.' Nick says and Michelle nods her head. Carla finds a table and sits down, lifting Arlo onto the seat beside her.

'I was thinking, why don't we have a drink or two then head home and have a cosy night in. We can order Chinese and cuddle up on the sofa.' Nick suggests sitting across from Carla.

'Sounds good to me.' She says quietly.

'So how are you doing?' Michelle asks placing the drinks on the table.

'I'm okay. Well I'm not but yeah.' Carla mumbles.

'Why don't Steve and I have Arlo tonight?' Michelle suggests glancing at the little boy curled into his mother's side.

'I-I don't know.' Carla replies.

'Come on, you two need a break. You have had so much going on this past month. With teddy being born and everything. Plus I miss my little buddy.' Michelle says.

'Okay...' Carla replies.

'You know what I kept thinking this morning?' Carla asks as she sits snuggled up on the sofa with her husband.

'What?' He asks.

'How lucky I am. I don't think I could've got through today if it wasn't for you, Arlo and Teddy... Not going to lie, it still hurt like hell but I think you all made it just that little bit easier.' She replies.

'Why don't we go to the seaside this weekend? We can travel down on Friday and stay until Sunday.' He suggests and she nods her head.

'That sounds like a great idea.' She says smiling slightly.

There's a room way up in heaven with hearts all on the walls, left by tiny angels who's wings were just too small. These hearts you see are special for they're made off tiny feet. They represent all babies who's hearts no longer beat.