AN: So I actually managed to fit time in to write this. This is a one-shot of if the big rebel attack hadn't happened.

Kiera said in an interview that if the rebels hadn't attacked, Maxon and America wouldn't be together.

So, if you don't want to see a sad ending for our fave couple Maxerica, you might not want to read this.

Disclaimer: All characters belong to Kiera Cass

Maxon and Kriss's engagement party served as a reminder that I was the loser; the biggest loser in all of Illéa. Nothing would ever compare to the pain I was feeling. It was like someone had pushed me down, and I couldn't get back up. But here I was, trying to look happy for Maxon's sake. I noticed that my smile was drooping, so I forced it back up, trying to hold back the tears. I wished this hadn't happened, that Aspen hadn't been outside my room this morning. But what was done was done. I couldn't change it. And neither could Maxon, because he made his announcement public. Once something is out there, you can't take it back.

No one was talking to me. Everyone looked like they wanted to respect my privacy and allow me to drown in my sadness alone. I heard someone tap the mic from behind me. I turned to see Maxon holding it, with Kriss right next to him. His warm brown eyes met my gaze. Is it just me, or is there a hint of heartbreak on his face? He quickly averted his eyes from me, wrapping an arm around Kriss. No. That was supposed to me. This was too much. I have heard of breaking points, and I'm sure that this was mine; seeing my love with someone else. I quickly turned to make my way out of the room.

I was almost at the door when someone grabbed my arm, hard. I turned to see King Clarkson with a sly smile planted on his face, his hand not losing any grip.

"Your Majesty", I said, trying to keep my voice even.

"Hello, Lady America," stressing the word out, like I didn't deserve to be of that honour. I guess I didn't. "Where do you think you're going?" he asked.

"I'm only going to the bathroom, Your Majesty." That was a lie. I planned on going somewhere that nobody would find or hear me.

"You should really sta–" he said, but was interrupted by Queen Amberly, who was at his side.

"Just let her go, Clarkson," she said kindly.

When he didn't, she said, "Clarkson, please."

He finally released my arm, which hurt a lot now. But it was nothing compared to the pain in my heart when I turned back for a second to look at Maxon, who gave Kriss a quick kiss on the cheek.

I walked out of the room as quickly as I could without making it seem suspicious. Once I rounded the corner out in the hall, I broke into a run. I made my way to that small nook where I saw Maxon and Kriss kiss for the first time.

When I got there, I sat down on the bench. I took my shoes off and hugged my knees to my chest. I leaned my head back onto the wall and looked out the window. I let the tears come, not bothering to wipe them as they flowed down my cheeks.

Hadn't I tried my best? I wanted Maxon, but I ruined it for myself. Did he love me? He had said it last night, but now, I couldn't be sure. I loved him, and I let him go. I was so stupid. I should have been more careful. I shouldn't have waited until the last minute. But if I told him before, would he still forgive me? I remembered our last kiss, so sweet and full of love. Now, he would be giving all that to Kriss. At that thought, a sob escaped from me. I tried to cover it up, but it was too late; I already heard the high heels clicking on the floor, telling me someone was coming.

I looked out the window, hoping that if the person came, they would have thought I was observing, not crying, and walk past me.

The clicking came closer and closer, until I finally heard it stop. "Lady America?" I heard a voice ask, unmistakably belonging to Queen Amberly.

I scrambled to my feet, keeping my head down so she wouldn't see my tear-stained face.

"Your Majesty," I said, lowering into a curtsy.

"Lady America, are you alright?" she asked, concern lacing her voice.

"Yes, Your Majesty," I said, trying to keep my voice from breaking.

"Lady America, look up at me, please." She said. I couldn't. I just couldn't. I didn't want her to see me like this.

"Lady America, look up at me," she repeated, with a sterner tone.

This time, I lifted my head so my eyes would be looking at hers. When they did, she gave a light gasp.

"Oh, my darling," she whispered, looking at me with worry. She wrapped me in a hug, which caught me by surprise.

This sudden action got my tears to start flowing again. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen. I was supposed to be happy in the end, not crying into the Queen's shoulder. She stroked my hair gently.

"It's okay," she said, "It's okay."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty," I said as my tears were coming to a stop.

"Shh. Don't say anything. It's fine. Just follow me." She said.

I trusted her, so I slipped my shoes on, and let the queen lead the way.

We went upstairs, and took many little hallways, when finally, we were in the Royal Corridor. I was confused by this, but I followed her nonetheless. She stopped in front of a room, unlocking the door with a key she pulled out of her pocket.

She pushed the door open, and inside, the view was breathtaking. In it was a big golden chandelier hanging from the ceiling, with a few plush couches here and there. The walls were a beautiful rose gold, making the whole thing feel more enchanting.

"I come here to relax my mind, sometimes." Queen Amberly said.

She led us over to one of the couches, motioning for me to sit down. When she was settled in as well, she asked, "Do you love him, America?"

"Yes I do, Your Majesty." I replied.

She gave a light laugh, "No need for titles here, darling. You can call me 'mom'." I paused when I heard that. It brought me back to that one day in the Women's Room when she said I could call her 'mom' if the Selection ended the way she thought it would. But it didn't.

Her expression turned more serious. "Do you love him, America?" she repeated.

"Yes, I do, mom." I said again.

"But who's him? My son or the guard?" she asked.

I froze. I turned towards her, unable to speak. How did she find out?

"Your Majesty, how–," I started.

"How I found out doesn't matter. What does matter is who you love. Do you love the guard?" she questioned.

"Yes, but as family. Not as anything else anymore." I said. She nodded in an understanding way.

"Then, do you love my son?" she asked, wanting to really know.

"Yes." I simply said.

"What makes you love him?"

"I don't know."

"Think, darling."

I felt awkward saying this, but I had to get it out. "I guess it's because he always makes it feel like there's no one else when we're together. And he's always there for me. I…I just love him." I said the last part quietly. "I love Maxon." I said, hoping to take the aching out of my body.

Nothing was working. I couldn't seem to remove the pain from my heart. It was worse than when Aspen left me, when Kota left, and even when my dad left. I cried quietly, hoping she wouldn't notice. But she did, probably because my shoulders were shaking uncontrollably.

"I love him." I kept on saying when she hugged me.

"I know, I know." She said soothingly.

"I never wanted to lose him." I said.

She stopped hugging me and looked at me.

"I always wished that it would be you. You make him so happy. I can tell. And he makes you happy, I'm pretty sure. He will soon come to his sense and realize that he should have picked you." She said.

"I don't think so. Kriss is perfect for him. He loves her." I said, staring down at my lap in shame.

Queen Amberly gave a sigh, while shaking her head. "My dear," my heart broke when I heard these two words. He used to call me that, and I never let him. Now, I wish I did. "Why do you always do this to yourself? You're always pushing yourself over the edge. Please don't do this. You don't have to bend so much that you break."

She put her hand on mine, making me look up at her. "Please come with me," she said.

I got up and followed her yet again.

She led us to the side of the room that was close to the door. A mirror was hanging against the wall. I looked at it, and saw my reflection. A broken-hearted girl who was trying too hard. Then I looked at the woman next to me in the mirror. It was the Queen. A beautiful, confident, and selfless queen.

"Close your eyes. I'll tell you when to open them," she said, calmly.

I did as she said. I heard things rustle against each other, and felt something on my head. It was being readjusted, when I heard, "Open your eyes."

I lifted my eyes and looked in the mirror. And there, laying in my hair, was a crown. Queen Amberly's crown. "I think that's how it should have been like." She said.

I was so taken aback that I couldn't stop looking at my reflection. For the first time, I caught a glimpse of what could have actually happened. I could have been married to my true love, became Queen, and call this person I stand next to 'mom'.

I turned to hug her, when I caught a glimpse of something at the open door. Maxon. Had he been here the whole time? He looked so hurt.

"Maxon," I breathed out, causing Amberly to turn towards the door, who quickly ran over to her son.

I slowly made my way over, being cautious as I went.

"Mother, what are you doing?" I heard him ask.

"I'm trying to help her." She said.

"By giving her your crown?" he asked.

"I'm doing whatever will help." She reasoned.

There was silence between them. I hoped to break the tension by saying, "Your Highness, shouldn't you be with your fiancée?" I barely even registered my voice, because I wanted to be his so badly. And now I couldn't.

"Yes, but I have to sort this out first." He said, with coldness in his voice.

But his eyes met mine, and instantly softened. Did he want me like I want him?

"Excuse me." Queen Amberly said, walking out of the room, leaving it to me and Maxon.

"I'll go to my room to pack up." I said quietly, avoiding eye contact with him. As I was walking past him, he took my hand.

"Can we just talk for a minute, America?" he asked. I debated this for a moment, but this was probably the last time I would ever see him, so I may as well stay.

I nodded slightly, and made my way back into the room. He closed the door for privacy. He turned to me and asked, "Do you love him?"

"I only love him as family." I said.

"I thought you would be honest with me, seeing as I told you everything about me. But surely, I can't trust you, can I?"

I didn't want to answer to that, because I knew the answer, so I switched the topic.

"I love you. Do you know that? And the whole day broke me apart. This may be the last time we talk, and I have one last question for you." I hesitated a bit. "Do you still love me?"

"America, stop wasting my time. Answer my question." He said.

"Maxon. Do you still love me?" I pressed.

"Answer. My. Question." He said harshly.

I gave up. "No, you can't trust me." I said, shame pouring all throughout me. "But please," I pleaded. "Do you still love me?"

He didn't answer. He just stared at the wall behind me.

"Do you, Maxon?" I really wanted to know. I asked the question again in a strained whisper. "Do you?"

He suddenly looked at me and said, "YES. I STILL DO! I LOVE YOU, OKAY?"

I paused. He still loves me. He looked so frustrated in that moment, like his dad could be. Then, as quick as ever, he came to me, and put his hands around my face, kissing me like never before. We're not allowed to do this. So I pulled back.

I looked at him, his eyes full of love and desire. "We can't do this, Maxon. You're already engaged to another woman." I said, although I wanted more.

"I should've asked you instead. I've always wanted you. I want you now. I need you." He said, his hands brushing my cheeks. "I love you." He said quietly, pressing his forehead to mine.

"I want you, too. But I can't have you." I replied. "And you made your choice, so you can't have me."

Pain and regret hit him in the face. Tears started pooling in my eyes.

"I love you, Maxon." I said.

I slipped out from his hold and turned to the door.

"America, wait," he said, his voice cracking.

"No. I can't. This is goodbye, Maxon." I said, tears trickling down my face.

And with that, I walked past him, out of the room, away from the person who could have been my one and only.

Okay. I actually hated writing that ending. I wanted Maxerica to have a happily ever after, but not all stories end happily.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed. Please review!

Bye