"I cannot believe that you're Dick Grayson."
"You've been saying that for the past hour," Robin laughed. He grinned in amusement at Artemis' stunned expression.
"Seriously though," Artemis pressed, "Dick Grayson." She paused, and her expression darkened slightly. "You absolute troll."
Robin coughed. "Oh yeah," he laughed awkwardly, "I'd almost forgotten about that picture…"
Conner stared at him intently, and Robin shuffled slightly. Sure, he'd expected this response when Bruce had given him the all-clear to reveal his identity. As Dick Grayson, he'd been in the public eye from the age of nine, and if the revelation of who he was wasn't shocking enough, the team also had to deal with the knowledge that Batman was Bruce Wayne (sure, he hadn't outright told them about his adopted father's identity, but it wasn't too hard to make the connection).
Still though, the stunned looks he was getting weren't the greatest thing to deal with.
"I saw you in a magazine once," Conner told him, sounding thoughtful. "You have very nice eyes."
Robin flushed. "Er, thanks Supey."
"Wow, you must be loaded!" Wally exclaimed, grinning widely. "Guess we know where Bats gets his money from, huh?"
"Er, yeah," Robin shrugged. 'You knew something like this would happen,' he reminded himself. The team would get used to this revelation after a while — it'd become old news soon enough.
Wally continued his excited stream of questions. "So, does your dad know that he's funding him, or do you hack into his bank account or something?"
"…Uh, I'm sorry, what?"
Wally's eyes widened slightly. "Oh, sorry Rob!" he exclaimed. "I meant your guardian, or — whatever you call him — "
Robin shook his head. "No, but — what do you mean, 'funding him'?"
"He means," Kaldur said, "does Mr. Wayne know about your activities as Robin?"
Robin blinked. '…What?'
"Is he not worried?" M'gaan questioned, frowning.
Robin was starting to realise that he and the rest of the team were on very different pages.
"Does that mean Batman is friends with Mr. Wayne?" Conner asked, his brow furrowing.
Yes — very, very different pages.
"Nah, can't be," Artemis said, flapping her hand. Robin listened, aware that he probably resembled a goldfish at the moment. "There's no way Batman would ever associate with Bruce Wayne — no offense Robin."
"…None taken?" This was - wow. Of all the scenarios he'd imagined, he hadn't taken this into account. "But guys — "
"You know, I thought finding out your identity would be the key to finding out Batman's!" Wally exclaimed in frustration. "But now I'm even more confused!"
"I bet it's the Commissioner."
Robin turned, and stared at Artemis incredulously. "Wait, Commissioner Gordon?" he spluttered. "You think Commissioner Gordon is Batman?!"
Artemis shrugged. "Well, you're pretty good friends with his daughter, aren't you?" Artemis frowned thoughtfully for a moment, her head cocked to the side. Then, she shook it slowly, dispelling the idea. "Can't be," she murmured. "There's no way in hell Batman would have a kid…"
Robin gaped.
"Hey Rob, your dad probably doesn't know that you're Robin, right?" Wally inquired. Robin decided to direct his incredulous stare at Wally, because, honestly, he didn't know what else to do. "I mean, he doesn't seem like the brightest crayon in the box — again, no offense — and if he knew about your secret identities, I doubt he'd be able to keep his mouth shut."
"Maybe Artemis is right, and it is someone from the police force," M'gaan mused. "Does anyone else have any ideas?"
Kaldur looked thoughtful. "Perhaps it's someone that Robin knew prior to his adoption."
"Oh yeah, that's a good idea Kal!" Wally said enthusiastically. "It'd make sense, why Batman has all those kick-ass moves — he was part of the circus!"
Robin's eye twitched. The thought of Bruce Wayne being part of the circus…no, it was just too weird.
"Good idea Kaldur!" Artemis told him, nodding her head. "But do you know who I think it is?"
'No,' Robin thought, 'and at this stage, I REALLY don't want to know either.'
"I am betting you that it's the butler!"
'…aaaaand I was right.'
"You should see the glare that guy can give," Artemis continued, while the rest of the team listened with rapt attention, and nodded their heads thoughtfully. "I always knew it looked familiar, but I'm only starting to put the pieces together now — "
"Guys, Alfred is not Batman!" Robin interjected. "And it really isn't that hard to figure out who is! Come on — who has the money to fund all the expensive equipment that Batman uses? Who has bucket loads of free time? Who has the perfect public persona, so that no one would ever suspect him…"
He was rewarded with a series of blank stares.
Conner frowned. "So…it is your butler…?"
Robin closed his eyes, barely resisting the urge to walk over to the nearest wall, and repeatedly smash his head against it. "It's Bruce!" he cried. "Bruce is Batman!"
"…Your butler and your dad have the same name…?"
Oh god, he was going to scream — he was actually going to scream.
"No!" he yelled. "Bruce Wayne is Batman!"
There was a moment of silence, and Robin thought, 'yes, FINALLY they've got it.'
…And then they started laughing.
"Oh, good one Rob," Wally choked out between guffaws, slapping Robin playfully on the shoulder. Robin felt his eye twitch. "For a moment there you had me going. Bruce Wayne is Batman…yeah right…"
"No really!" Robin exclaimed, a hint of desperation in his voice. "Come on, it's obvious when you look at the facts — lots of money to fund his projects; lots of free time; someone you'd never suspect…" The team were still staring at him in various degrees of amusement and confusion. "…A large manor with a cave underneath it…"
He stopped abruptly when he saw the sympathetic expression that was appearing on Artemis' face.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" Robin asked, with dread in his voice.
"Oh Robin — I get it now," she said softly.
"What?" Robin demanded. "What do you get?!"
Artemis sighed, and touched his shoulder gently. "You don't know who he is, do you?"
"…WHAT?!"
"Yeah, that makes sense!" Wally agreed, while Robin let out an internal scream of frustration. "Bats never told you who he is, did he?" He shook his head. "Wow, he takes paranoia to a whole new level…"
"No — guys, you aren't listening!" Robin cried desperately. "Bruce Wayne is Batman!"
M'gaan frowned. She looked so sad — Robin wanted nothing more than to punch her in the face.
"Oh Robin, you poor thing," she murmured. "I'm sure it isn't that he doesn't trust you — Batman is probably just waiting for the right moment to tell you!"
"I know who he is!" Robin howled. "Bruce — my DAD — is Batman, goddammit!"
"I say we go question the butler," Wally said seriously.
…
AN:
…I really need to stop writing these one-shots, and focus on my chaptered fics.
However, I am now on holidays, with nothing to do, and these random fic ideas keep flowing. And Young Justice, and anything to do with any of the members of the Bat!family - especially Dick - is the best. So I had to write this xD
Tell me what you think!