Here's the a story! I'm hoping I can have it done in under 10 chapter, but who knows how that will go.

I was waiting to post this here and AO3 until I had an idea of where I was going with it, and had more than the first chapter written. I have chapter 2 done and posted on tumblr (majormetalandcolonelsparky or stillnotginger10 tagged / texting-fic) but I'm going to wait a couple of days to post chapter 2 here so that I have time to work on chapter 3, and hopefully make posting a little more evenly paced.

This site is messing with my formatting a bit, so emoticons may be different here than on AO3 and tumblr, and I had to add the lines in between sections instead of just space. Let me know if it messed anything up and I missed it. Hopefully it's all still good and readable though.


Ed is bold

Roy is italics

Al is normal


Saturday PM


(3:22) Shit. Broke my arm again. Winry is going to KILL me OTL

(3:24) Again? Do you break your arm often?

(3:25) You're right! Once a year isn't THAT bad

(3:26) Maybe this time I'LL get mad when she hits me with her wrench

(3:28) Should I be concerned? Maybe you should call the police, not a stranger, if you're being abused.

(3:29) Abused?

(3:30) Did you just call your older brother a stranger?

(3:32) I don't have a brother. Plenty of sisters though.

(3:35) …Al?

(3:36) No. Wrong number.

(3:37) WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY THAT BEFORE ASSHOLE?

(3:38) FUCK

(3:39) Do you swear this much with everyone who isn't your brother?

(3:40) NO. JUST BASTARDS LIKE YOU

(3:41) I'm honored.


Monday AM


(9:01) How's the arm?

(9:05) Who is this?

(9:06) Fuck. Leave me alone creep. Bastard

(9:07) Such hostility. I'm only showing concern.

(9:08) It is the middle of the night (

(9:10) It's 9AM?

(9:10) What?

(9:11) Are you in a different time zone? Sorry, I didn't think.

(9:13) SHIT IT'S 9AM G2G FUCKING LATE


(9:11) WHY DIDN'T YOU WAKE ME UP!?

(9:12) I tried! You threw a book at me!

(9:12) Throw one back next time! I'm so late for O-chem

(9:13) What the fuck Al!?

(9:14) I'm saving you a seat and told the prof your car wouldn't start.

(9:16) You're the best little brother


Monday PM


(12:58) My arm is fine btw

(1:00) Hello again. I wasn't sure I'd be hearing from you.

(1:02) Yeah well, figured I owed you for the wake up text

(1:02) Saved my ass

(1:03) So yeah. My arm is fine. Winry fixed it

(1:04) Good to know.

(1:05) How did you break it anyway?

(1:07) Was walking by Engineering and one of the undergrad's launched a rocket into it (

(1:08) Fucking idiots. Who tests a design that's so obviously crap?

(1:10) Clearly they're not as smart as you.

(1:11) Obviously

(1:12) So are you a grad student then?

(1:13) Huh?

(1:14) You said undergrads as if you weren't one.

(1:15) Oh right. Yeah, getting my masters

(1:16) I'm not saying where though! You're still a creepy bastard

(1:18) Alright, alright.

(1:19) I suppose I'm not getting your name then?

(1:20) No way in hell

(1:21) A nickname?

(1: 23)

(1:25) Fullmetal

(1:26) Fullmetal? Interesting nickname.

(1:27) It's just something some people call me. Don't ask.

(1:29) You got a name?

(1:31) Call me Flame.

(1:32) Flame…? õ_ó

(1:34) What exactly is that symbol supposed to be?

(1:35) A raised eyebrow. What the fucks it look like?

(1:36) You do better then

(1:37) ',:-)

(1:39) …that looks creepy as shit

(1:40) Does not.

(1:41) Fucking proof you're a creepy bastard

(1:42) :(

(1:43) Sooooo Flame? Why?

(1:44) You hot or something? haha

(1:45) Very ',:-) ,':-)

(1:46)

(1:46) Did you just wiggle your fucking eyebrows at me?

(1:47) You liked it.

(1:48) Omg you're a creepy perverted bastard

(1:49) This is why they have seminars and shit about stranger danger

(1:50) Or maybe it was drinking. Idk I didn't go

(1:51) Oh good. Then I can prey on you all I want

(1:53) …the fuck?

(1:54) Joking. Joking. Though I feel the need to point out that you called me handsome first.

(1:55) I did not!

(1:55) Shut up!

(1:56) Aw are you blushing?

(1:57) Shut the fuck up!


(1:51) Who are you texting?

(1:51) You?

(1:52) No. Before that. Ling says you're paying more attention to your phone than your food.

(1:53) Wtf? Ling's not even here.

(1:53) Yes, he is.

(1:54) Lies. I don't see him.

(1:55) Does anyone ever see Ling?

(1:56) Damn ninja

(1:57) So you're not texting me, or you weren't a few minutes ago

(1:58) You're not texting Winry. I checked.

(1:58) Stalker

(1:59) You're clearly not texting Ling. Rose's phone is broken. You never text Russell.

(2:00) Because he's an ass

(2:01) So who are you texting?

(2:02) I have more friends than that

(2:03) Uh huh. Sure. So who are you texting?

(2:05) No one. It was a wrong number. New phone, remember?

(2:06) I wrote the wrong number when trying to text you Saturday

(2:07) You've been texting some stranger since Saturday!?

(2:08) Not continuously

(2:09) Shut up

(2:10) Interesting. Him? Her? Name?

(2:11) You're not going to get on the news for being kidnapped by some wrong number stranger, right?

(2:12) omg

(2:13) I'm done talking to you


(2:12) So why Flame?

(2:13) It's just a nickname from work.

(2:13) What? Did you burn down the break room or something?

(2:14) Haha something like that.

(2:14) A creep and a pyromaniac? Maybe Al was right

(2:15) About?

(2:16) You trying to kidnap me

(2:17) You don't plan on it, do ya?

(2:18) Damn. You got me. Been planning it since Saturday.

(2:19) Now I'll never get the ransom money.

(2:20) Haha we're broke college students. Kidnapping me wouldn't do you shit anyway

(2:21) Besides I'd kick your ass if you tried

(2:22) You think you could?

(2:23) I know I could

(2:24) Arrogant brat.

(2:25) Creepy bastard


Tuesday AM


(10:17) Entertain me ;)

(10:18) No

(10:18) Go away

(10:19) Don't be like that. I know you missed me.

(10:20) No. Go away

(10:21) Words can hurt, Fullmetal :'-(

(10:22) Tough. I'm on my way to teach a class. Can't talk.

(10:23) Oh, you teach?

(10:24) Yeah. I teach, they pay some of my tuition. That's the deal

(10:25) Srsly g2g

(10:26) Ttyl?

(10:27) Prbly. Be in lab all night

(10:27) Could use the company

(10:28) It's a date.


Tuesday PM


(9:30) Are you at the lab?

(9:34) Where else would I be? I practically live here

(9:34) Where are you? Somewhere fun?

(9:35) I'm at home, having a nightcap before bed.

(9:36) Sounds more fun than babysitting experiments here

(9:37) It probably is. It's a good nightcap.

(9:38) Sorry about earlier. I hope I didn't make you late.

(9:39) No, no. It was fine. Made it just in time

(9:41) Good. Hate to think I'd gotten you in trouble just because I was bored at work.

(9:43) Where do you work anyway?

(9:44) I'm in the army. A Colonel. So they just stick me in an office all day.

(9:45) Where you slack off

(9:46) Fullmetal! I am offended!

(9:47) You can't act offended when I'm the person you text when you want to slack off -_-

(9:48) Still offended!


(9:44) How old are Colonels in the army?

(9:46) Good evening to you too, brother. Having a nice night?

(9:48) It's fan-freaking-tastic, Al. The lab is alive with the sound of music

(9:50) Are we quoting musicals now?

(9:50) How long have you been there?

(9:51) Too long. I'm going insane

(9:51) But seriously. Colonels. How old?

(9:52) Idk. I don't regularly question military officers about their age.

(9:53) Ughhhh why not?

(9:53) Why the sudden interest?

(9:54) ...

(9:55) Brother?

(9:56) Flame's a Colonel

(9:56) Who?

(9:57) Wrong number guy

(9:57) Or girl. Idk

(9:58) We really are going to be on the news OTL

(9:59) Why do I talk to you?

(9:59) Why do you talk to strangers?

(10:00) GOODNIGHT ALPHONSE


(9:54) Still offended?

(9:55) You insulted my character. I'll die offended.

(9:56) Can you be offended and talk at the same time? Because the lab is boring

(9:57) Sigh u_u my suffering means nothing to you.

(9:58) Pretty much

(9:58) Brat.

(9:59) What are you doing in the lab anyway?

(10:00) Right now? Watching the 3D printer make a part I need

(10:00) I meant what are you studying.

(10:01) Is your nightcap so boring that you want to hear about science?

(10:02) I like science.

(10:02) Really?

(10:03) Why is that so surprising?

(10:04) Idk most people get bored when I talk about my work

(10:05) And soldiers seem less brain more brawn

(10:06) I'm offended again.

(10:07) You get offended a lot, huh?

(10:08) No. You're just offensive.

(10:08) Hey!

(10:09) Do you deny it? ',:-l

(10:10) Oh no. The creepy eyebrow is back

(10:11) ',:-)

(10:11) ,':-)

(10:11) ',:-)

(10:12) Stop! Stop. I'm getting weird looks for laughing at a computer

(10:13) You do realize that just makes me want to continue, don't you?

(10:14) Ughh


(10:10) Just ask him how old he is.

(10:11) GOODNIGHT ALPHONSE


(10:16) Sooooo? What's your major?

(10:17) That's pretty much the college equivalent to asking about the weather

(10:18) But fine!

(10:18) Biomechanical Engineering

(10:19) Wow

(10:19) What are you planning to do with that degree?

(10:21) Winry and I are working on a new type of prosthetic limb

(10:22) We'll really be able to get funding and make progress once we graduate

(10:23) But we've got a lot done already

(10:24) Is this the same Winry that fixed your arm?

(10:25) Uh

(10:25) Yeah

(10:26) Hmm

(10:27) Have the two of you ever considered working with the military?

(10:28) We have a lot of funding available if you can convince the powers that be to take an interest.

(10:29) Hahahahahahahahaha

(10:29) No way in hell

(10:30) We're staying civilian

(10:31) Oh well, worth a shot.

(10:32) If you change your mind though, a recommendation from me would go a long way.

(10:33) Oh yeah? You a big shot?

(10:34) I like to think so.

(10:35) Even though you set fire to the break room?

(10:36) Haha even so.

(10:37) Though I may get in trouble with my Lieutenant if I'm late because I stayed up all night texting you.

(10:38) So I'm afraid I have to go to bed. I shall talk to you tomorrow though.

(10:39) Fine! Leave me to a night alone in the lab :(

(10:40) Haha goodnight bastard

(10:41) Goodnight, Fullmetal.


Wednesday AM


(2:56) Are you still in the lab?

(2:58) I thought you were going to bed

(3:00) Having trouble sleeping. Still need company?

(3:01) I'm still not making any huge breakthroughs, so why not?

(3:02) Everything okay?

(3:04) Yeah. Fine.

(3:05) Alright…

(3:06) Tell me a bedtime story?

(3:07) HAHAHAHAHA

(3:07) Once upon a time…Fuck off!

(3:08) Must admit: I've heard better.

(3:09) Fuck

(3:09) Off

(3:12) So has nothing interesting happened at the lab?

(3:13) Nope. Forget the lab

(3:13) Tell me about what YOU do. I still don't anything about your job

(3:14) What do soldiers do?

(3:16) I really don't want to talk about that right now.

(3:17) Or think about it.

(3:17) Sorry

(3:18) No. That's fine

(3:19) Something to do with why you can't sleep?

(3:20) Shit. Sorry. Nvm don't answer that

(3:22) Sorry

(3:26) Once upon a time there was a brilliant wizard…

(3:27) Oh. Am I getting my story?

(3:28) Not if you keep talking

(3:29) *zips lips*

(3:30) Right. Where was I before I was so RUDELY INTERRUPTED?

(3:31) Once upon a time there was a brilliant wizard

(3:32) Who was the best at potions. He could make a potion for everything

(3:33) And the whole town loved him

(3:34) And he was badass as hell

(3:34) So the town also feared him

(3:35) And he was the tallest man in any land

(3:35) A whole head taller than the king

(3:36) Two heads taller than his brother Al

(3:37) He sounds very tall.

(3:38) His tallness is very important to the story

(3:39) Of course.

(3:40) The brilliant, badass, extremely tall wizard's name was Fullmetal

(3:41) *gasp* I did not see that one coming.

(3:42) Weren't you shutting up?

(3:42) *zips lips*

(3:43) Better

(3:43) One day a horrible, ugly ogre attacked the town

(3:44) So Fullmetal joined together with his brother, Sir Alphonse

(3:44) Who was much shorter than Fullmetal

(3:45)

(3:45) Right

(3:46) The brothers joined together to fight the horrible, ugly ogre

(3:47) The ogre's name was Russell

(3:48) Russell? How is that an ogre's name?

(3:49)

(3:50) The ogre's name was Flame

(3:51) I like Russell better.

(3:52) Too bad. Flame is a much better name for an ogre

(3:52) A horrible, ugly ogre that the townspeople ran crying from

(3:53) I'm not sure I deserve this.

(3:54) The brothers moved to attack the ogre

(3:55) The poor probably handsome, ogre.

(3:56) But then the not handsome at all ogre tripped

(3:57) And fell over in an embarrassing display of its own stupidity

(3:58) And then rose from the ground more handsome than ever?

(3:59) It was dead. Killed by its own lack of coordination

(4:00) The poor ogre. It didn't deserve to go that way.

(4:01) The townspeople cheered

(4:02) And threw a party for the brothers, but especially for their beloved, tall wizard

(4:03) And everyone lived happily every after. Except the ogre. Who died ugly

(4:04) What a marvelous story.

(4:05) I thought so :)

(4:06) With those kind words in mind, I think I can manage to sleep now.

(4:07) Night bastard

(4:08) Thank you, Fullmetal.