Drunk Shenanigans

Disclaimer: Nothing that you recognize belongs to me. (Do I look like George Lucas?!) (Have now just realized that no one knows what I look like)

A.n. I have written a Strange Magic Modern Day AU! Here goes nothing!

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Bog King was already having a pretty crap day before the blonde pixie girl climbed into his truck's cab, making him choke on his coffee in shock.

"You're not Sunny," the girl stated sullenly as she frowned up at him.

"Aye," he replied feeling rather dumbfounded as she wiggled herself into the seat before beaming up at him. Bog was beginning to get the suspicion that she was a little tipsy.

"Scottish!" She chirped in delight at his accent and he suddenly noticed that she had glitter everywhere on her person and every time she moved she spread it all over his truck.

"Bog King," He added and felt a surge of hope as he spotted her purse and gently pulled it from her fingers.

"Boggy Woggy Kingy Wingy," She sang to herself making Bog stop dead in his search of her cell phone. His Aunt Plum called him that despite the fact that she knew he hated it.

"Bog," He repeated, a little harsher than he had intended, and Pixie Girl's eyes started to water. Oh God.

"Sorry." He was only just barely handling a tipsy girl in his truck, he couldn't handle a tipsy girl who was crying in his truck.

"I can't find Sunny Wunny," She sniffled. Bog winced in sympathy for Sunny's nickname as he succeeded in fishing her phone out of her purse. He reached over and patted her hand while dialing the most called number labelled Marianne.

"Dawn?" Well now Pixie Girl had a name at least.

"Not exactly," he admitted and heard a loud thunk on the other side of the phone. Marianne must have dropped something.

"Oh God did Dawn lose her phone? I told her not to take it out of her purse in case of emergency." Marianne's voice was filled with exasperation. He sighed loudly and glanced over at Dawn, who was drawing swirls in the glitter that had ended up on his dashboard.

"Not quite." Bog was going to break the fact that Marianne's maybe sister/best friend had climbed into his car a little easier but Dawn cut him off.

"Sugar pie honey bunch, you know that I love you!" Dawn sang, exceptionally loud and off key. Bog groaned loudly and pinched the bridge of his nose as he revised his previous guess. Dawn wasn't just tipsy, she was well on her way to hammered.

"Why is my sister singing to you? Where's Sunny?" Marianne asked.

"I don't know! She just climbed into my truck!" Bog spat and suddenly he got chills straight up his spine.

"If you have harmed a single hair on my sister's head I will cut off your testicles, force feed them to you, disembowel you and dance on your entrails," Marianne said in a deadly serious manner. Bog had to admit that it was pretty impressive that Marianne was able to scare the shit out of him over the phone.

"I haven't. If anyone's been traumatised it's me with your sister's singing and glitter and tears!" Bog fired back and, to his complete and utter shock, Marianne laughed.

"Yeah Dawn can be like that. Where are you? I'll come pick her up and see if I can find Sunny." Sighing in relief Bog gave her the address and sent a sideways glance at Dawn, who had stopped singing and was staring out the window. Just as he hung up the phone and put it back into her purse Dawn squealed and threw herself out of the truck. Bog said a few choice phrases in Gaelic as he fumbled out after her, catching up with her in time to see her practically tackle someone.

"Sunny Wunny!" She cried in joy and Bog breathed out a prayer that she hadn't just attacked a random man on the street.

"Dawn! Man I'm so glad I found you, your sister would've murdered me!" Sunny gave a visible shiver and Bog couldn't exactly blame him.

"Sunny this is Boggy Woggy," Dawn announced as Bog wandered up to them. Bog spared Dawn a frustrated glance but decided to let it go. There was no use arguing with a drunk person.

"Thanks for finding Dawn," Sunny said and Bog almost felt sorry for what he was about to tell him.

"I phoned her sister." Bog suddenly wished he had a camera so that he could have captured the look of sheer horror that fell over Sunny's face.

"Oh God," Sunny managed to get out before a car pulled up beside them and a girl hopped out. Bog assumed it was Marianne, if only because of the very terrifying vibe that she was giving off.

"Sunny, how could you lose my sister!? Dawn, how could you just climb into some random guys car?!" Marianne requested as soon as she'd reached them. Bog was suddenly very glad that he was not on the receiving end of this inquisition. Sunny waved his hands around in front of him.

"I had to go to the bathroom! I can't exactly take Dawn to the men's room with me!" Sunny protested and Bog shrugged his shoulders.

"True," he stated before he could think about it and blushed the instant Marianne turned towards him. He was suddenly struck by how her dark purple eyeshadow complimented her brown eyes. He blushed harder and held out Dawn's purse to her.

"Anyways here's your sister's purse." Marianne took it and tucked it under her arm.

"Thanks," She said and Bog shrugged again.

"No problem." He waved goodbye to Dawn and Sunny and headed back to his truck.

"What's your excuse!?" Marianne's voice carried very well.

"I saw Roland," Dawn's response was much quieter and despite the fact that Bog was several feet away at this point, he could still detect the change in the air.

"Marianne!" Bog could see a sleazy, looking blond man in a green shirt start jogging towards them out of the corner of his eye.

"Get in the car. Get in the car right now." Marianne ordered and the panic in her tone made Bog spin on his heel.

"Oh come on Marianne!" Bog assumed that this was the Roland that Dawn had mentioned and judging by the way that Marianne was desperately trying to get everyone in the car, there was some bad history.

"Go away or I'll call the police." Marianne's words and Roland's extended hand, made Bog walk faster.

I'll just go over there and intimidate him. Since Bog was a rather towering figure it didn't take much for him to intimidate others.

"Don't be like that Marianne," Roland pleaded and wrapped a hand around Marianne's wrist. She immediately tried to extricate herself from his grasp.

"Let me go. Right this instant," Marianne threatened, and just as Bog came up beside Roland and threw a right hook into his face, Marianne twisted her arm and a loud crunching sound issued from Roland's wrist. Roland hit the ground screaming.

"Sorry. It looked like you needed the assist from over there." Bog gestured vaguely behind him. Marianne smiled up at him as Dawn and Sunny climbed slowly out of the car.

"That was awesome! Did you break his nose?" Marianne requested gleefully. Bog flexed his fist a few times before grinning conspiratorially at her.

"Quite possibly. Did you break his wrist?" Bog asked and nudged Roland, who was still laying on the ground and moaning, with his boot. Marianne nodded enthusiastically.

"I'm going to call the police," Roland blubbered from the pavement and Bog and Marianne looked down at him in distaste.

"I already have, dickwad," Sunny bit out and tucked his phone away. Bog looked at Marianne.

"Should I ask?" Marianne sighed in response.

"It's a long story," She answered.

"Long enough for coffee?" Bog queried, shocking himself at his boldness. The last time he'd asked someone out he'd stuttered and blubbered so much that the girl in question hadn't been sure that he'd just asked her a question.

"I think you've earned it after this half hour," Marianne laughed, grabbed a marker out of her pocket and scribbled her number on the back of his hand.

"I look forward to hearing from you," Marianne said and Bog grinned.

"I look forward to finding out why I just broke someone's nose."

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Well there you have it! Thank you very much for the read/review/favourite/follow/reblog/like if you did any of the above!