Missing You
Pairing: Asanoya (Asahi x Nishinoya)
Rated: K (fluff, starts with some angst, but it's a happy ending)
Summary: Set after Asahi and Nishinoya's fight. The road to recovering a relationship is not always easy, and sometimes the problems run deeper than they appear.
"You won't know if you don't try damn it! The next one could've gone through for all you know! Don't you dare decide to give up on a ball I've recovered!"
Even now, Nishinoya's voice rang out in Asahi's mind. That match they had lost to Datekou was a crushing defeat. Asahi had never felt so angry with himself before and the way Nishinoya had yelled at him was simply too much. They both said too much, went too far. The happy comfortable relationship they had built up so far had been broken leaving uncertainty and regret in its place.
Asahi thought about it all the time now, before that point they had been on good terms, friends on the borderline of something more. Their relationship was an unspoken one, a bond that was never clearly stated out loud. But with that last defeat, Asahi had ruined everything. He had ruined everything for their team as well as his relationship with Nishinoya. He couldn't go back, he couldn't face Nishinoya again after all of the terrible things that happened. He couldn't forgive himself.
The longer Asahi stayed away however, the more he missed volleyball. The more he missed the thrill of playing and spiking the ball. It probably didn't help that everyone was trying to get him to play again… everyone that is, except Nishinoya. It made Asahi terribly sad, he wondered if the libero would ever forgive him, would ever love him again.
Days turned into weeks and Asahi had still not gotten on the volleyball court again. And he continued to mope until the day he was thrown back on the court along side Suga and Nishinoya.
"Call for the toss again, Ace!"
In that one practice match, Asahi regained his confidence in himself as well as learned the true meaning of relying on his teammates. But more than that, he was just glad Nishinoya was speaking to him again.
Of course it was awkward in the beginning, Asahi more than anything wanted to go back to the way they were before. He honestly just missed Nishinoya, he missed his jokes and his laugh and the way he would sneak shy glances Asahi's way when he thought he wasn't looking. But after that whole incident, despite gaining Nishinoya's forgiveness, their seemed to be a deeper scar in the libero's heart that refused to let Asahi in any closer than as a friend, until one day Asahi had decided to ask what was wrong.
"Umm… Noya, is something bothering you? Are you mad at me?"
The two had gone home after practice together. Hanging out at Asahi's seemed to be their regular habit now. Asahi's parents were always away and Noya would always ask for help with homework so it worked out well. The ace of Karasuno scratched the back of his neck nervously as he waited for Nishinoya's reply. The shorter boy who had been sitting on his bed reading a magazine had responded without looking.
"What do you mean Asahi-san? We're hanging out, of course I'm not mad at you!"
Nishinoya laughed playfully, not seeming to take Asahi's question seriously as he continued to flip through his magazine. Asahi took a deep breath and asked the question that had been bothering him for a while.
"Noya… we've been kind of different from the way we were before, more distant. I know I messed up, and I know you forgave me, but it feels…"
He struggled for the right words before blurting out what he hoped to be something that made sense and got his point across.
"It feels like you're avoiding… us, the way we used to be, and I want to know why."
Nishinoya remained silent for a long while. The magazine lay forgotten off to the side. Asahi was so nervous now he was beginning to feel like he would pass out.
And then suddenly, Nishinoya spoke. It was so quiet Asahi wouldn't have believed it was Noya if he hadn't seen the boy speak the words himself.
"Why are you asking that now…?"
Asahi was scared now, scared that he had gone and messed it all up again. He watched the smaller boy nervously before replying.
"W-Well… you mean a lot to me and it's been bothering me for a while. I miss the way we were before."
Nishinoya inhaled and exhaled slowly, avoiding eye contact. He seemed to be organizing what he had planned to say if this conversation ever did come up.
"I just… I don't think we should go back to how we were before. It's too complicated, if something like before happens again, someone will get hurt again and… and I just don't want to deal with the commitment."
He rambled out, still not looking at Asahi as he spoke. Suddenly, it all made sense to Asahi and he realized just how badly he had hurt the person that he had come to cherish the most. He moved closer to Noya, gently turning the boy to look at him. What he saw broke his glass heart. Nishinoya was a light shade of pink, his eyes were tearing up but he was holding them back, trying to look cool Asahi suspected. Asahi placed a gentle hand on Noya's face before taking a deep breath and speaking.
"I'm sorry… for hurting you so deeply. I… I was angry with myself, but never with you. I have the utmost respect for you Noya. You have so many qualities that I admire, and I shouldn't have left you… I shouldn't have and I'm sorry I did. But more than that, I want to have that relationship with you again…"
Asahi trailed off, wanting to say more but also not wanting to scare the small libero. Nishinoya finally looked up at Asahi, his expression seemed torn.
"Why should I believe you now?"
He asked almost childishly. His eyes seemed to be searching Asahi's for the answer he wanted to hear. Asahi despite his nerves took Nishinoya's hand in his and smiled.
"Because… I love you. I've loved you since the first time you told me to depend on you. And I am weak-willed and I do lack courage at times, but you're the opposite. You make up for everything I lack and I love you for it. So if there's anything left of you that still cares for me, please give me another chance."
Nishinoya's face had lit up completely showing off the brightest and most dazzling smile Asahi had ever seen. The libero flung himself at Asahi, hugging him tightly.
"Yes. Yes of course! Asahi-san, I can't believe you said something so cheesy, but I loved it! It was great! You're great! I love you Asahi-san!"
Nishinoya announced quickly and loudly before kissing Asahi's cheek causing the taller boy to blush and stammer nervously. Nishinoya just laughed and plopped himself down in Asahi's lap, wrapping his arms around his neck and kissing him happily.
"You're not allowed to go all glass heart on me again, okay Asahi-san?"
Asahi smiled and nodded, holding Noya close and kissing down his neck playfully.
"Okay."
THE END
Extra:
The next day, Asahi and Noya announced their relationship to the rest of the team…
Noya: Sooo, we're dating now! Congratulate me Ryuu!
Asahi: Ah… yes, it's true.
Tanaka: Orryyyaaaaa! Nice one Noya-san! Guess that means I have Kiyoko-san all to myself now!
Kiyoko: Congratulations to the both of you.
Daichi: Who confessed first?
Suga: All that matters is that you two are happy. (Proud Mama)
Hinata: Wah! Sempai, teach me your ways!
Kageyama: Shut up dumbass! Who would date you anyway?!
Tsukki: That answer is obvious.
Yamaguchi: Tsukki's so smart!
Tsukki: Shut up Yamaguchi.
Ennoshita: Anyways, congratulations you two!
Daichi: I can't lose to Asahi…
Suga: They make a nice couple.
Hinata: Ask me out Kageyama!
Kageyama: That dumbass…
Tsukki: I'm surrounded by idiots.